fartonexit

[fartonexit]

I can feel the caffeine and the still asleep part of my brain having a fist fight

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Is Tumblr actually embracing itself finally?

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Just thinking about Brazil and how they are polluting my yard with warm dangerous snow

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I can point to so many ppl in my life that act this way, and one of them is my grandmother

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Dream setup getting there

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I'm exhausted and wanting to scream

[fartonexit]

This is what hard work looks like

Hot sautéed mushrooms to boot

[fartonexit]

Blast this in your most hated enemies house when they’re asleep

https://youtu.be/q84iebqfRC4?list=OLAK5uy_m0drokAb1nwlWfyFQJnWgvoc7vg3lau_I

[fartonexit]

Officially had to hold a shit for 2 hours today bc my boss hda to have me double back on orders that mere already sent out only to throw out half the shit I just made.

Really, why the fuck am I required to be employed if every single place I work is run by fucking spasticks

[fartonexit]

I'm tired of crying. Melon please come home.

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Well my partner is an idiot and lost my chameleon up a tree. We spotted him once we think, but are waiting to see if he pops out.

[fartonexit]

HEX GIRLS in SCOOBY DOO AND THE WITCH’S GHOST (1999), dir. Jim Stenstrum

[fartonexit]

I can’t stop laughing

[fartonexit]

Well I'm back. Not reaving or anything, but been dealitg with shit.

Got hazed at the drag bar. Probably not meaning to ha e, but thats what it was. So I blew up at them on their fb page the next day and quit, basically. And I know one of them has access to my tumblr. I'm going to address them here just in case.

Kris, no one cares.

Anyways, I'd go in a lotg rant of all the wous and hardships of my daily life that hurt my job and wah wah but at the end of the day the only person that NEEDs to care about me is me.

My problem ot the bar was that I was still coming out and still dealing with really raw emotions based off of abuse I'm still experiencing. And actually now I've gotten an apology for stuff I didn't even know about, but has helped my life for the better.

And yeah I didn't say anything but motherfucker I owe you nothing stop making me feel like I have to tell you my life you fuckin bitch I don't want to get over it.

That was for kris at the end.

Been missing therapy appts, not on purpose. Bc of family or my partner, though now I think I've torn into everyone about how god damn important my appts are that if they intersect and for some reason my appt is their responsibility, tough shit.

The house is slowly becoming less of a hoarder hole. Slowly my mother is starting to accept me and kind of understand that transitioning isn't a little social patty cake game. Its me growing up because I got stunted emotionally, and it just so happens I already hated the vessel I'm in, it was just accentuated more and more for so long I probably am a bit fucked in the head now, but then really who isn't at that point.

But we're actually going to try to communicate. She walked up to me last night, honestly started to make me flip out because I'm expecting a certain subset of info, which also kinda showed her, hey, I'm defensive rn because I don't expect anythitg good fr stuff, and she's questioning that and I'm fucking glad.

I'm at a point transition wise where I've boiled more genders off too, now I'm just at 2. When I was a kid I experienced more like 10 or so, sometimes it feels like 40 or 50 though, but I think thats the DiD function of your brain at the time.

Side note child psychology and developmental psychology are mother fucking fascinating.

Then it boiled down to seven, then five, then last year it went from five to four, and as I've been able to socialize more, 2. Beth are nonbinary subsets that probably genderwise in a traditional sense ares't very describable, but I experience part of my life thru touch, so while it may not make sense to someone else, its literally just because describing things is dard for me.

In any case, at this point I'm putting money together to get my HRT. The meds are like 99% paid for, I just gotta get the copay. Better than paying 3k a few months a year! I'm gunna legally change my name, and depending on how burned I feel at the time, I kinda sorta decided I'd usurp my full name. But I won't explain why though, I don't owe that to anyone but me.

Only doing pesticide job rn, but honestly other than my income slowing down, things have gotten easier. I actually have time for my hobbies now. I can catually PLAY A ROUND OF TARKOV AND NOT GET IN TROUBLE FOR BEING LATE TO SOMETHING i DON'T WANNA DO. Its literally night and day that job.

Really I think the lesson is work at your own pace and fuck america. And I say that patriotically.

[fartonexit]

Gunna look at this every morning until I have my HRT in hand.

May 8th and 9th, 2021

[fartonexit]

Take a pipe to your nearest chud.

https://medium.com/@katelynburns/im-a-trans-woman-and-i-don-t-know-how-to-do-this-6958817a29b7

[fartonexit]

Had to rip into my mom yesterday over a flake and a half of hay.

A flake and a half of hay that I 'wasted' that had a nettle plant in it.

I'm not going to put shit in a hay net that'll intentionally stab my horses.