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normal business partner activities

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that weed you smoke is "bad people" weed

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i hate when men complain about women’s body hair, even like the fine hair on their backs. go fuck a shark if you wanna have sex with something hairless

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After many years of selective breeding, they've finally developed a breed of phoenix that, rather than self-immolating itself into ash, instead roasts itself to a perfect internal 165° F while burning off all the feathers, resulting in an instant, ready-to-eat poultry dinner.

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When fans notice their demon hunting injuries

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If you want a good object lesson about what we can and can't know about the past, we don't know Ea-Nasir was a dishonest merchant selling shoddy goods.

What we know is we have found a cache of complaint tablets about him selling low quality copper as high quality, in a site that was probably his own residence. We know multiple people complained he was a cheat. It's entirely possible they were right. It's also entirely possible that he kept these complaint letters as records of people he would no longer do business with, because they had made accusations and threats in order to bully him into giving them free copper. That is an equally valid interpretation of the evidence.

My point is not that we have maligned Ea-Nasir, my point is that thousands of years later, we do not and cannot know.

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preserving this awesome comment before i blocked them for unrelated bigotry

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Adult realization: you will make mistakes, you will act irrationally. You will commit some wrongs that cannot be fully righted. People will dislike you and misunderstand you for all sorts of reasons. None of these make you a bad person. All you can do is try your best to be kind and just to people, grow and learn.

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Mama deer do not reject their babies if you touch them. You should not do it but the whole “If you touch baby animals, their parents will reject them.” thing is largely a myth. You shouldn’t touch a baby deer because you might scare it. Or its mom might come out of nowhere and beat the shit out of you. Don’t do it. Monitor the fawn from a distance if you must. But deer are tougher than they look.

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hung out with my young cousin today and she showed me "soul bug school" which is the gap between her toy chest and the wall where she secretly puts every dead bug she finds in the house

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you need ANYTHING you just tell me. My boy Lucario will hook you up. *gestures to lucario*

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I’m just saying if Daniel Radcliffe, the literal protagonist of the Harry Potter franchise since the age of ten years old, was able to disavow JK Rowling and move on from the HP universe then actually what the fuck is anyone else’s excuse. There is no one else on the planet who can say their entire childhood was HP more than that guy and he still cared about trans people more than the average tumblr user who says “we’re protesting by making all her characters queer and trans!!” like you can do better. You should do better.

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sure, you can have my number *writes a long equation and grimaces as a beam of light turns me to ashes*

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chris martin accidentally exposing a CEO for cheating with his employee via a kiss cam at a coldplay concert is the funniest thing i’ve heard in a while

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No, I would not steal a car. However, if I had the ability to create a copy of someone's car that I could have for free while the other person retained their original car, I would definitely do that.