fawnworked

[fawnworked]

just popping on to say hi + give a little update. i've still been really busy with portfolio work BUT hopefully next weekend i should be able to find some time to sit + write. i miss oliver + i miss you all too, feel free to come bug me on discord if you like otherwise i'll be back soonish!

sorry for being MIA! super busy w family + academics... life has been hectic lately, to say the least. it's likely i'll be mostly inactive here for a while, but i'm more likely to be around on discord so feel free to add me (just please tell me who you are if you do)! i'm holophotal over there

[fawnworked]

sorry for being MIA! super busy w family + academics... life has been hectic lately, to say the least. it's likely i'll be mostly inactive here for a while, but i'm more likely to be around on discord so feel free to add me (just please tell me who you are if you do)! i'm holophotal over there

[fawnworked]

"Oh, no. I'm not that way at all." It's deadpan, but a pretty obvious lie to begin with and given away further by the fact that he breaks, a little irrepressible twinkle. Oliver needs attention like he needs air, and though he may not opt to seek it in crowds he can relate to the sentiment. He washes down his little fib with a sip of his pint, long-ignored in favor of conversation.

At their next comment, he nearly chokes on his drink. Recovering relatively smoothly, he mumbles "Yeah, I get that" into the quiet. He really, really does. "Sometimes any noise at all is too much. Like, even the sound of my own clothes and breathing and that." He pauses, thinking, then asks "Can you hear electricity? Like, do lights make noise to you?" He doesn't experience it himself, but he's heard that some people do.

He exhales a laugh at the alcohol comment, raising his glass. "Cheers to that."

"Mm, tolerable. Good phrase." And this compliment is genuine. Nadine is the furthest thing that one could be from a literature major. "I like bars, and shit like that. I mean, well.." They motion with their fingers as if they're rewinding a tape. A common theme of talking with them is recognizing that sometimes, they just tend to say things without thinking. It's a shock they haven't already made this motion.

"It's like... I dunno if you're this way, but uh, I thrive on being around people at times. Absolutely adore just like, attention, and all that." There is a knowing grin here. "But at the same exact time, sometimes I'm in a place like this, and I just need everyone to shut up, and stop breathing."

A tiny pause. They're not even entirely sure why, just feels like it's needed.

"Alcohol though, that's nice, too. Haven't found a truer friend."

[fawnworked]

"Now that you mention it, I might’ve seen them." It’s an affectation, and one he isn't that concerned with convincing her of; he absolutely has seen her writing. It plays a large part in his newfound fascination with her, beyond the inherent magnetism of recognizing another person who doesn’t fit in here. Her words demonstrate a depth that the majority lacks, even in this supposed world of high academia. "–Yours tend to be on the more macabre side, yeah? Very different." He's quick to clarify, a hint of a smile tinting his voice: "Different is good."

The poetry seems a safer topic of discussion than what happened to Lisa’s mother. Oliver isn’t much good at offering sympathy at the best of times, and her story is downright horrific; he doesn't know what to say when words clearly can't negate the misfortune and suffering she's been through.

"Well. Regardless of how you wound up here, I'm glad you have. It's sort of exciting to find another real person here." He pauses. "Especially another with an interest in literature. I hate to admit it, but I'd probably like you less if you were here studying maths." He smiles at his own joke, an exhale that's not quite a laugh.

"I'm sorry, I don't mean to be rude." || @fawnworked, oliver

⸻ People often asked Lisa how she'd ended up in England. Although, they typically lost interest soon after due to her tendency to fall silent. It wasn't that she couldn't tell Oliver what had happened to her — to her mother, Lisa just needed to search for the right words. She needn't be overly descriptive when she discussed it. She hesitates to answer the inquiry, but she chooses to try.

. . .

❝ . . . There wasn't a reason to stay there anymore after my mom . . . ❞ She swallows, letting the air escape from her lungs through her nose and feeling her chest deflate. ❝ Dad remarried and Taffy, my stepsister, she got into some competitive cheer-slash-dance program up here. So, we moved. Again. Wasn't as big a deal the second time. ❞

So, things had shifted. Her step-sister and everyone else in her immediate surroundings began looking like Abercrombie & Fitch ads, while she made a smooth transition into her alternative style. Truly, there'd only been one silver lining to the hand she'd been dealt: a superior college essay, which paired with her poetry and gpa, landed her a full-ride to Oxford.

Of course, these people were twice as shallow as the folks back home, which was saying something. The only other American import she could find had taken to calling her 'MySpace,' due to her personal style.

Oliver seemed the first to notice she had a personality as well.

❝ . . . It isn't rude to ask. ❞ She pauses. ❝ I got in on my own merits . . . not because of what happened. [...] I write poetry. They're — they're in the paper sometimes. ❞

[fawnworked]

muse relationship headcanon game w @sheldoney

who curses more? : oliver. who is more patient? : oliver. who does the driving? : oliver. who is louder? who is quieter? : sheldon is definitely more talkative, but ollie doesn't mind that. who is more physically affectionate? : probably oliver. who is more likely to tease the other? : sheldon. who is better with time management? : sheldon, absolutely, though oliver is pretty good with it himself. who wins the arm wrestling matches? : oh oliver is 100% taking sheldon DOWN. he boxes! who controls the music in the car ride? : for some reason i imagine them riding around in absolute silence... cracking myself up lol. who covers dinner when they order in? : 50/50 split, or if they're eating different things they pay for their own items. who is more outgoing? who is more shy? : i don't know that either of them are necessarily "outgoing" or "shy", but they're both particular. who has the more outlandish fashion sense? : neither of them dress particularly outlandish, as far as oliver is concerned. who starts the tickle fights? who ends them? : oliver isn't ticklish. who has the darker/more "edgy" sense of humor? : oliver. who is more competitive when it comes to games? : oh my god, these two... they're both HIGHLY competitive & this seems like a recipe for disaster actually, lmao. who has the bigger appetite? the bigger sweet tooth? : oliver isn't much of a foodie nor a sweet tooth, so? not sure! who is more likely to get in a confrontation in public? : sheldon. who hosts the parties/hangouts? who organizes them? : oliver probably hosts. he can't foresee a world where sheldon trying to party-plan ends well, so maybe he does that too. who is better at cooking? do they ever cook for each other? : oliver, & he would absolutely cook for sheldon if he wanted. who is more likely to engage in dangerous and/or illegal behavior? : oliver 100%... he commits felonies when he's bored. who is more likely to notice when something is wrong with the other? : oliver. he's very in tune with body language generally, & sheldon in particular is easy for him to understand. who does the talking in public settings (i.e. to the waiter at a restaurant)? : both. who is more likely to extend a helping hand & provide emotional support? : oliver. who is the bigger prankster? do they get the last laugh or do they suffer for it? : oliver doesn't enjoy being the butt of a joke, & he isn't one to pull pranks either.

[fawnworked]

muse relationship headcanon game w @everyoneismytoy

who curses more? : felix. who is more patient? : oliver. who does the driving? : felix. ollie is a passenger princess. who is louder? who is quieter? : felix is louder, in every context. who is more physically affectionate? : felix, & oliver couldn't be happier about it. who is more likely to tease the other? : felix. who is better with time management? : oliver. who wins the arm wrestling matches? : felix, because oliver lets him. who controls the music in the car ride? : felix, usually. he's more into music in general, so ollie doesn't mind. who covers dinner when they order in? : felix. who is more outgoing? who is more shy? : felix is the social butterfly between them, probably because he's always had to be. oliver is an observer by nature. who has the more outlandish fashion sense? : in their youth? felix. in older verses? oliver. he develops a taste for more trendy avante-garde fashion over time, as he acclimates to being wealthier. who starts the tickle fights? who ends them? : oliver isn't ticklish. who has the darker/more "edgy" sense of humor? : oliver, probably, but he doesn't go there out loud often. who is more competitive when it comes to games? : oliver 100%. do NOT play games with this man unless you can handle his godawful sportsmanship. he's out for blood & is not above straight-up cheating. who has the bigger appetite? the bigger sweet tooth? : oliver isn't much of a foodie nor a sweet tooth, so probably felix for both. who is more likely to get in a confrontation in public? : felix. who hosts the parties/hangouts? who organizes them? : felix hosts, because what better venue is there? in older verses where he's gotten married, his wife does most of the planning. otherwise those duties fall to the staff. who is better at cooking? do they ever cook for each other? : oliver is better at cooking only because felix has never had to feed himself, lol. they don't cook for each other, maybe as a one-off gesture on ollie's part but that's it. who is more likely to engage in dangerous and/or illegal behavior? : felix is more reckless & impulsive whereas oliver is secretive & premeditated, but both get into their fair share of trouble. who is more likely to notice when something is wrong with the other? : oliver. he pays a probably excessive amount of attention to felix's body language, so he nearly always notices when something is off. who does the talking in public settings (i.e. to the waiter at a restaurant)? : both, depending on context. who is more likely to extend a helping hand & provide emotional support? : oliver. felix typically has more immediate emotional needs & ollie tends to keep his struggles to himself. who is the bigger prankster? do they get the last laugh or do they suffer for it? : felix is, & oliver is a poor sport about it.

[fawnworked]

'you think I'm playing god? fine, you play, ollie. you decide, right now, who should live. us, or them?'

"Us." He doesn’t hesitate to answer, steadfast belief bright in his eyes. "I'm not saying we should let them win, Lis." Whoever’s best suited is who comes out on top—that’s the way of the world, and Oliver has no doubts at all that he and Lisa have the potential to be an unbeatable team. Their combined resolve is incomparable.

He only questions her knee-jerk approach to the issue at hand. "I just wonder if this is the most, er, effective way to handle things." Outright murder is… beyond his comfort zone, if only just slightly, and it likely wouldn't even keep them safe. He's in over his head; one foolish mistake, and now they have this to reckon with. For all his psychological fumblings and background manipulations, Oliver's unused to such immense and immediate pressure to act.

He grounds himself with a breath, cogs turning. They need a plan of action that doesn't involve straight-up killing everyone who's onto them. "More bloodshed draws more attention. What else can we do? Do you really think they're going to try to kill us?"

[fawnworked]

❤️ let’s pretend u don’t know this

<3 always down to ship w other muses too btw

[fawnworked]

dude trust me *lying, manipulating*

[fawnworked]

❤️runs for the hills

yeahhh omg let’s do it! i could see them being so much fun to write

[fawnworked]

❤️ yeah

always & forever open to shipping in more verses bb! felix & ollie are it 💗

[fawnworked]

Send ❤️ if you want to ship but are too shy to ask

Can be sent on anon or not

[fawnworked]

He nods along as he listens raptly to Felix's mumbled explanation, keeping a hand in his hair. It brings him a resolute comfort to be reminded every now and then that he really does enjoy these nights they share in secret—that while Oliver may be sick for wanting to have him like this, so too is Felix sick for coming to him in need of such treatment. Sometimes he has to remind himself that the only reason they started this little game of theirs is because Felix asked, all those years ago. When they were still in the prime of their youth, less fragile and more foolish.

"Who's to say what we should and shouldn't do, besides ourselves? This is what we want. Nothing gets in the way of that." He takes one of Felix's lax hands, brings it up to his face to press a quick kiss to the back of it. With Saltburn temporarily all to themselves, at least they can pretend for the night. In the confines of this bed, they are their own keepers. That's what matters.

When Felix's eyes fall closed, he smiles softly. The man deserves a little rest, body fighting as hard as it is; he deserves a little reassurance, too, whether or not what Oliver says is entirely honest. "I'm not afraid, angel. You put your trust in me, and I'll take care of you." Truthfully, he's terrified that one day they'll push too far, but he does his best to make peace with the possibility and does all the research he can to feel safer doing what they do. If, God forbid, something were to happen... at least his love would go knowing he was cared for.

it was after they finished doing what Felix wanted to do . To have his body broken and put back together again and become reborn in this world that no one ever would find out about.

He was in love with Ollie and his body was his for the taking and to do anything he wanted to as it always was in the end. . It felt different now and he should stop but he didn't want to do it. His body needed It and he would die without it but he would die with it too .

as he let him touch him and take care of him Felix got closer to Ollie and he thought about it. .all the feelings that came from when it happened. He felt close to death and to life if that is crazy well it is.

"It feels like I'm dying and when I go through it I feel like I could see God and see the world in a different way in another way . I never ever felt like this before. Not until you Ollie. . And I know I should stop but I can't do it . Does it scare you ? Does this scare you? I'm not afraid Ollie I'm not afraid. " he closed his eyes and he stayed in his lovers arms safe from the world and his wife.

He didn't want to go back to being sir Felix catton and live that lonely life again. He started shaking again and he had to ride it out because it was heaven and Oliver was his God. . They were together and nothing mattered only them. He was older but nothing changed and it never will.

[fawnworked]

He's pleasantly surprised by their reaction, but given that they'd been willing to bring up the subject in the first place he figures he probably shouldn't be. It's odd, to be able to talk about this, but it is immediately soothing to know this is another thing he and Nadine have in common.

The little explosion gesture earns a quiet chuckle. It's very much apt; even for Oliver and his literature degree, sometimes words don't do the trick. "The headphones seem like a great idea." He would be nervous to call attention to himself, but enough people wear them out and about anyway these days that they don't look out of place in most settings. In fact, he hadn't consciously registered that they were even wearing them. "Might just have to get myself a pair."

At their next question, he looks around. The bar and its other occupants had faded away while they chatted, his attention focused entirely on Nadine. "Eh." He shrugs. "It's... tolerable. The background chatter can be a bit much, but I do okay." Because he has to, or else start drinking alone at home which is a whole new level of depressing he isn't ready to stoop to. "I do even better with a couple pints in me. Fuzzes the noise out a bit."

“Dude, sick!” There is always a level of relief that comes with someone like them. A way that shoulders relax slightly, as they feel just a little more sure that he’ll be easier to interact with than most. They know that everyone does not feel the same as they do about the subject but they’ve found a way to be proud of that aspect of themself. Most of the time.

“Listen, I don’t blame you. Crying sucks. Especially when you’re already feeling all like.” They are making little explosions with their hands. That seems more fitting than any word could be. “My parents just thought I liked throwing fits all the time.”

And they have to wonder what his relationship with his parents is like. They want to ask, but he doesn’t seem nearly as open as they are just yet. So they’ll wait.

“I started just wearing headphones when I went out, genuinely changed my life.” They tap the pair that are currently hanging around their neck. They go basically nowhere without them. “How d’you feel about a place like this?” The bar they were in wasn’t crowded, but it wasn’t empty, either. They’re curious.

[fawnworked]

"Not the magazine type." ...As if he needs to say as much. He's a literature student, after all; tabloid gossip and the latest fashion trends don't typically pique his interest. The next bit out of her mouth does, though. "Why should I take Elspeth's side on anything? If you mean what I said about the suit... I just gave you my honest opinion. It is sheer." He plays coy, unsure what she's trying to imply.

A sly smile cracks at the mention of Felix's probable reaction. That would be a sight to see, no doubt; the man is adorably prone to pouting, overgrown child that he ostensibly is. Thinking it over, eyes wander pointedly, then a firm: "You shouldn't change. It looks good on you." He lets the comment hang in the air, trying not to look too pleased with himself for it. "...But UV exposure is nothing to play around with, Vee." He's mostly joking—fairly obvious, given his own bad habit of forgoing sunscreen and ending up more burnt than bronzed—but his delivery is distracted.

She narrowed her eyes at him, a ROLL of her hues then before she shook her head. "Jesus, Ollie, have you NEVER picked up a magazine before?" she asked, puffing on her cigarette then as she laid back, covering her forehead with her arm as she felt the sun against her skin then. She didn't really know what she should expect from him, really, it wasn't like she knew anyone who cared about fashion. At the mention of her mum, her lips cracked into a smile, however, looking over to meet his eyes with a cocked eyebrow. "And here I thought you'd actually be taking HER side," she hummed in agreement, a nod of her head then as she licked her lips.

"He can POUT all he wants about it, I'm not going to change--" The answer was nearly obvious... Felix had not seen her little NUMBER just yet, and she could only imagine his reaction when he does. "I'm certain Farleigh would GAG so at least that's another in my corner, no?" she added with a small smirk. "D'you reckon I'd need sunscreen underneath if it's meant to be see-through?" Because she NEEDED his eyes on her always.

[fawnworked]

OLIVER QUICK and FELIX CATTON SALTBURN (2023) dir. Emerald Fennell

[fawnworked]

The guilt—and Felix's ghost, the manifestation of his actions lounging in the grass before him—is all Oliver has left. Listening to him speak sends pangs of longing through him, sharp even after all this time and all these ghostly visitations. The words themselves land softly. I'm not leaving without you. It would be sweet, if he didn't understand what Felix was asking.

Maybe it was anyways. These somber moments together are the only good thing he has. His life has been neatly reduced to curling up in Felix's old room and waiting out the darkest of the lonely times, keeping himself out of it by whatever means he can access. The offer of eternal togetherness sounds blissful in comparison. Never mind the path to getting there.

"What I want is to be with you, Felix. I don't care about anything else." His voice thickens as tears well up in his eyes, exhausted and sad and full of hurt. "Just not... Not like this." He gestures at Felix's form, a manifestation of his soul—a ghost, haunting Saltburn much the same as Oliver does. But while Felix's anchor is his death, Oliver's is the life that he could have had. "This is torturous, for both of us. If it's the best we've got I could stick it out, but. If I can be with you forever..." It's all he wants, in whatever way he can have it. The answer is easy. "I'll do it."

‘I did this. I did this to you.’

@fawnworked

vengeful - v.e. schwab sentence starters change tenses/pronouns as needed !! some lines have been edited for clarity / length / ease of roleplaying tw : death , violence , language , mental health

the ghost was outside of saltburn laying in the grass just trying to figure it out and yet the truth is he was happy to see Oliver again and he didn't think he would get out of bed and stop being so depressed .

But here we are now. Talking about the things we can't change. Thing's that happened to them both and how much it shaped them. It made Felix sad seeing him that way.

fix it and make it better. The guilt had to end before it was too late and it would ruin them both as it was. Looking at Oliver Felix took a deep breath wanting him to understand what he wanted. .the guilt and everything has to end . It needed to be fixed once and for all .

" you did this to me Ollie but you got me back . I'm not leaving without you and you know that . We have to move on together and you can't stay like this . Human because I thought about it and I know that we have to be together in the afterlife . Do you want to be young forever Ollie ? You know what you have to do and what I want. This isn't helping us and you know that. What do you want ? "

He was serious about it and he wanted Oliver to be with him to die with him and become a ghost . Closing his eyes Felix was confident he would say yes and just take him up on his offer to be with him forever . No one was happy being like this and Felix was ready for this if his one and only would do it . Be with him forever as he should be .