fck-joe
fck-joe
SUCKER;;
131 posts
joe jonas. singer. 1/3 of jonas brothers
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fck-joe · 6 years ago
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linzmorgcn‌:
“I think I am too cool for that actually to happen don’t you think?” Lindsey questioned sending Joe a knowing look. “However I could be a pretty amazing fangirl, could’ve showed up with an ‘I heart DNCE’ t-shirt” she teased. Crazy to think she had become friends with someone who was a Disney star turned rockstar, in a way she kind of liked it. The actress had her own fame to claim but it was an inner moment she would probably have when she said yes she was a fan of his band, even if at first his song Cake by the Ocean didn’t actually mean Cake by the ocean. But that was her own inside joke she would debate on sharing.
Seeing Joe’s eyes roll made Lindsey let out a laugh. She could easily tell the situation she was in with a couple of bandmates playing a couple of jokes. Actually it wasn’t the first time she had been tested with teases and jokes considering she had a whole band of co-stars who teased each other endlessly on set. But at least they seemed like cool people so far, and if they weren’t she had alcohol to keep her covered. She leaned back hearing Joe’s sentence quite entertained with it “at least I think they would. Oh I am glad you asked Mr Jonas, the one time? There are plenty, such as this one. Although this one sucks a little less now that I am here, but it is lacking quite a few beer kegs how disappointing” she teased with an overdramatic sigh.
“For sure, way too cool.” Joe agreed, meeting her lion with a smirk. “I mean that’s one way to win over a group of cocky rockstars. Proclaim your love in bold print on a t-shirt.” It amused him to no end seeing people in merchandise from his various musical pursuits, be it Camp Rock or DNCE. He was flattered of course, but at the same time seeing his face on a shirt would never get old.
“That’s a bold statement,” he quirked a brow. “How many Morgan parties can say that they’re fully crowded within the first thirty minutes?” It was all too easy to slip into the banter that typically characterized their interactions “We’re classy adults here, no kegs. If I wanted to a cultivate a college basement party atmosphere I would’ve had you DJ,” he teased. “Damn, Joe’s feeling brutal,” Jinjoo laughed, earning a grin from the singer. “I thought he was bad on tour. You should see him in the morning before coffee, the guy will bite your head off.” Joe shook his head, tousling his hair, “Okay, that’s just the risk you take talking to someone who isn’t a morning person before 11am.”
Action/Reaction ✘ Joe&Lindsey
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fck-joe · 6 years ago
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chlobenzz‌:
Oh yes, I expect the works. Top 10 things? I will make them very easy for you. Chocolate covered Strawberries, a massage voucher, some new sunglasses since I dropped them in the pool on this cruise.. Am I overwhelming you yet? If I am not I haven’t suggested the 10 day trip to Costa Rica… Just yet. Awe bless you Mr Jonas, it took a lot of photoshopping and hiding inside the Hardzello apartment. That’s all I can really say, oh and of course FaceTime calls set above the stomach.
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Consider it done, your requests are manageable. I can make the strawberries, massage, and new sunglasses happen by this time tomorrow, and your Costa Rica package will be waiting for you when we dock. Maybe wait until post-baby to have me put the bookings through, I think Ben might kill me if I whisked you and Baby Hardzello out of the country on a moments notice. Impressive, that’s some crafty work right there Ms. Bennett.
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fck-joe · 6 years ago
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cmlotz‌:
Caity knew that Joe was the ideal person she thought of when going to have a drink with. It was a cruise and everything so far seemed beautiful but it is also was a great opportunity to get drunk and party which Caity obviously spent 55% of her life doing that anyway. So adding onto a bar by the pool and on a pretty great ship just seemed a lot more of a cooler way to drink. 
Thank god it was easy enough to find Joe on the cruise expecting it to take a while considering everyone was obviously going to be around the pool as the sun was shining away. After Comic Con and filming it had been a tight squeeze to fit in before she would have to go back to all of that. So being in South Haven was quite precious to her. She let a laugh fall from her lips seeing him “I would be very disappointed in you if you decided to drink without me, ice tea? That’s pretty depressing… I had a bunch of doughnuts” she said with a smile pushed against her lips as she bounced up on one of the bar stools. “Come on you know I would always have to go for shots first, then a Frose sounds like an absolute treat Jonas.”
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Joe had gone into their meeting knowing that he would most likely be useless for the rest of the day, having cleared his schedule as soon as hanging out was on the table. When they went out drinking or partying, they went hard. That could only be amplified by the fact that the cruise had a great bar and the whole atmosphere practically screamed party.
“I missed doughnuts? Fuck, screw the iced tea I should really be texting you before I decide on anything,” he chuckled, running a hand through his hair. “It’s a plan then.” With that, he waved over the bartender and put in an order for their shots. “Aside from giving you doughnuts, how’s the cruise treating you?” Sitting on a ship in the middle of the sea made for a very different kind of vacation, especially in terms of adjusting to having a roommate, and he was curious about how she was liking it.  
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Seaside Drinking » JOE&CAITY
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fck-joe · 6 years ago
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So you’re the one I should be sending a shitload of gifts to? Done. I’m going to be needing a list of the top ten things you want, either physical gifts or spa treatments or, hell, vacations, because you’re an incredible person and incredible people deserve big-ticket gifts. What I also want to know is you’ve managed to keep this a secret? Consider me impressed. 
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Yes yes my fellow Haveners, the rumors are true. The questions have been answered as to why I haven’t been drinking at events, and hiding myself away because at times I thought I was looking a little chubby… I went through a phase. But I am so damn proud to announce I am carrying Hardzello’s baby. Don’t ask how it happened because it will make me puke, there’s no pun involved in that sentence. But I accept all your gifts, hugs, extra, extra.
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fck-joe · 6 years ago
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tessthomps‌:
I tried to sneak off with Thor’s Mjolnir during Ragnarok, and that… didn’t work out. Chris never lets that thing outta his sight, which is super lame. He’s already got one at home – I don’t see why I couldn’t keep this one. But it’s fine, I’m fine. I kept to the small things; things that I’ll never reveal, just in case Marvel comes after me. I can do coffee too, if that helps, but my support usually wins people over. I’ve got that type of face – I’m everyone’s favorite hype woman. Oh, a hundred and one? Seems like a stretch, but fine. I’ll do what I have to to get those shrimp and grits in me.
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Call me next time, maybe I can distract him while you run. Mjolnir is the ultimate grab. Is there anyone on set who might help you out? There’s gotta be at least two of those floating around at any given time. That explains it, it’s all in the face. You play the part of favorite hype woman well — if you aren’t careful you might become my new best friend. Deal, wine and shrimp and grits in exchange for a few apologies. Sounds like a fair trade to me, be prepared to be amazed.
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fck-joe · 6 years ago
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Feeling the buzz of his phone from its place on the lounge chair beside him, Joe lifted it and unlocked the screen to find his marching orders for the day. Luckily he was already at the pool. If there was one thing he wanted to do on the cruise, it was to get drunk. There was something about drinking on a boat that made it more fun, and Caity was the perfect person to add to it.
It didn’t take long to reach the bar, as it was only twenty feet from where he’d posted up that morning. With the tour with his brothers starting soon, he didn’t know how long it would be before he’d have this kind of downtime again, so he planned on soaking up the carefree cruise lifestyle for as long as possible. He spun around at the feeling of someone pressing on his shoulders, a grin spreading across his lips when he saw her. “Not a chance, c’mon I can’t start drinking without my favorite drinking partner. All I’ve had today was an iced tea and some fries to make sure I don’t get wasted too quickly,” he smirked. “What’re we starting with? Shots? Frosé? Pick your poison, Lotz.”
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Seaside Drinking » JOE&CAITY
( Joe Jonas // @fck-joe )
Caity instantly knew as soon as there would be a cruise in her view there was going to be drinking. Although she knew deep down she would calm it down it was a holiday, and what better way to drink than with one of her best friends? Sending a text to him to meet her at the bar by the pool side Caity pushed her sunglasses up to her forehead scanning around for the dark haired man. She knew as soon as her and Joe spoke they would instantly get along, a similar kind of vibe on life, drinks and partying how could she not get along with him? And the cruise was the perfect way to bound their friendship with a mountain load of liquor?
The cruise came as a gift to sit back, relax and even drink. She was thankful she already had a roommate to bother, ready to bond with Joe on the people they were with during the cruise they clearly had a lot to talk about. And adding alcohol to the mix it was sure to be a good evening. Seeing his back towards her over the crowd, the blonde let a soft laugh push from her lips as she quickly walked over and used both her hands to push up on his shoulders to jump in front of him. “Please don’t tell me you started without me or that would give me a reason to walk away and never speak to you again” she teased winking over in his direction.
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fck-joe · 6 years ago
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linzmorgcn‌:
“I would’ve been a pretty interesting person if I was that type of chick to wander around aimlessly looking for some Jonas Brother party, it was the music that gave it away” Lindsey remarked wiggling her eyebrows over him once. If it was a quieter type of night where no one but Joe was in his apartment then maybe she really would make an impression on everyone in his building. She was lucky it was a party, and was merely surprised with how many people recognized her from the show. Easily slipping into a conversation with the people around her seemed natural once Joe had left her. 
She probably should’ve mentioned what her poison was before she left him but it was easier to make him guess even if he may be choosing for a while. The brunette noticed the walls growing closer due to the amount of people, she would’ve predicted how massive a Jonas party would be. He was indeed one of the most well known celebrities in town, was she envious? Yeah maybe a little. But at least she had the company of his band members. Her view switched over to the bandmate who called her name, showing him a laugh she gave Joe a surprised look when she heard she was talked about. Becoming overly flattered it was the complimented words of a party vibe. “Let’s call it that I just know how to party better than most Haveners” she said moving her head to face the other band member. Taking the silicone cup from Joe and hearing him instantly caused the brunette to roll her eyes. “Let’s be real, I am sure most of your parties would be pretty dull if you didn’t have me there Jonas” she teased bringing the cup to her lips.
“You definitely would have been,” Joe agreed around a laugh. “Especially if you told them where you were off to, devotes fangirl is definitely a unique look.” Saying that he and his brothers were back together was still a very surreal feeling. They weren’t kids anymore, they’d proved that with their various solo endeavors, but he had a feeling that any mention of the Brothers would always remind people of three scrappy teenagers singing on Disney. And the idea of Lindsey being one of their fans was comical.
Joe jokingly rolled his eyes at the look she gave him, meanwhile, Jack just chuckled at the exchange. He knew all about his bandmate’s teasing tendencies, and it had taken a little while but months in a tour bus had allowed them to find their own balance between the teasing and genuine friendship. He wondered if it was the same here, as Joe was the kind to keep a limited inner circle and his sense of humor could be a lot for some people. “Would they really? I mean, I’ve thrown quite a few ragers without you and they’ve turned out fine. Tell me one time my party’s needed saving?”
Action/Reaction ✘ Joe&Lindsey
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fck-joe · 6 years ago
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tessthomps‌:
I’m a humble kleptomaniac. I’m not about to proclaim it to everyone and let them know what I get up to in my down time. If they knew, I’d never get away with it. Between the scripts and rewrites? You won’t believe what else I decide to collect – taking the wardrobe I wear for movies isn’t so bad, right? We all do it. Did you ever think otherwise? I’m here to support your worst, most weird-ass thoughts, and remain judgement free. As much as humanly possible, of course, because I’m bound to have some kinda opinion.         Do you think if I said sorry a hundred times, I could still get in on these shrimp and grits?
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Wardrobe is probably more universally acceptable since I’m sure more people do it. But so long as you stay humble in your kleptomania, I can’t imagine that anyone is missing the things you’re sneaking off with. Fair enough, and you should know that I’m always indifferent until someone proves that I should feel otherwise. Usually they win me with coffee, but you’ve managed to do it with support. Make it a hundred and one times and it’s a yes. Maybe I’ll even throw in a sparkling wine to pair with the dish... if I’m feeling generous.
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fck-joe · 6 years ago
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benhcrdys‌:
you’re not only the first to know, you’re literally the first person beside joe and i to know — i haven’t even told rami and gwilym yet, and i’m pretty sure they’re going to be our top choices for the godfather position. thank you. me and joe already have a way that we’re going to announe it to the rest of the town, so until then please try your hardest to not spill the beans. god, joe is just straight up chaotic with the stuff he does. whether i like it or not, i’m going to have to end up being the strict parent, because if not our child will burn our house down or something.
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Mum’s the word. I’m good with secrets, you have nothing to worry about. Besides, I have tour prep coming up so I’ll be too busy to squeal. If being the strict parent means saving your home from total disaster, I’m behind you 100%. 
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fck-joe · 6 years ago
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cmlotz‌:
You did not just start singing Queen lyrics to me, I guess it relates. Same goes to you, I would hate to lose my best drinking buddy. We’re like the dream team, except we are R+21 and drink together. But it’s like, youtube videos? You’d think those would be the ones you’re like, yeah okay feed me lies and clickbait. My blonde is showing when it comes to that then, because that’s how much I suck. I can’t disagree with you there, few life hacks and tips hep me through life. Anytime before December and I will come running right over, well I don’t see a Jonas Party invitation in my hands now do I? It’s more depressing that you’ve thrown one without me attending. A two day notice? I think that sounds fair enough. That does sound quite depressing, do I have to be one of those people who makes you eat if you follow the process? You might be… But I can’t tell since I am too offended you offended my age. 
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I thought it was clever, especially since it totally relates and all. Exactly, we’re the new and improved dream team. If it’s your blonde showing, then I have no excuse. Remnants from the one time I went blonde? YouTube brings us Buzzfeed Unsolved though, which I refuse to accept as anything but fact. Your attendance would have upgraded it from epic to legendary, which is why this Jonas Party I’m throwing for you is going to be the biggest thing this country’s ever seen. Y’know sometimes I think it’d be better if I was a dog and couldn’t talk... this is one of those times. Will bonus booze and mozzarella sticks unoffend you?
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fck-joe · 6 years ago
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michaelb-jordann‌:
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I like your style, my man. I should also include my favorite snacks, especially candy because people are always giving and getting me gifts which I feel like shit for never being able to use or even liking. You were so much younger back then and what moms describe as ‘moody’ for teens which I swear I didn’t grow out of yet. You seem to have to, which is good for you and even better for the ladies. So tell me, how many of those women be throwing bras and their number up on stage?
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Favorite snacks, that’s a really good idea, plus it doubles as a shopping list since you’ll have all your preferences in one place. So then you don’t have to limit them to just fans and can give them out to your family as well. Just might be a little hard to explain why you had them made in the first place. Fair, I was very moody. And too many. Way too many. Maybe I’d appreciate them if I was a girl and actually wore bras, but at this point I’m like ‘you know this is going in the trash, right?’
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fck-joe · 6 years ago
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linzmorgcn‌:
Lindsey could already hear the music booming blocks away, It was clear a Jonas type of party could’ve always been the centre of something massive, something huge. Though she couldn’t blame them since it was one of the hottest bands, surprisingly she could handle a lot of random party people as long as their was alcohol she couldn’t see a problem there. As soon as the alcohol would flow she was sure to chat up as many people as she could to make some new friends. Plus this was Downtown so how could she expect any less then loud music and insane parties, she just couldn’t.
When the door opened she showed the boy in front of her a simple yet formal smile. “I was considering knocking on every door but that makes me feel like a loser doesn’t it?” She questioned and was lightly joking behind her words as she stepped inside the apartment. The music was louder as she stepped in and she could already see many people filling the room, but at least there weren’t so much she couldn’t see the wall on the other side of the room. She was actually thankful that Joe had invited her now out for a good night at his place. Following his lead to the couch, Lindsey was lowkey starstruck but wouldn’t show it through her exterior. She gave a small wave to everyone trying to remember each and every one of their names as Joe spoke to them. She honestly zoned out around Helena, but then snapped towards Joe’s direction automatically zoning back in when he questioned her. “Oh hell yes, a drink would be awesome” she said placing herself down on a free spot placed on the couch.
“Maybe a little, though it might have won you friends with all my neighbors,” Joe laughed, closing the door behind her just on the off chance those neighbors weren’t yet aware that he was throwing something. Joe nodded in response to her answer, leaving Jinjoo to launch into a conversation about how she recognized Lindsey from TV. It was odd seeing his two worlds collide in that way, but so long as everyone stayed happy it was something he could adjust to. He didn’t mind an excuse to throw a party.
Not knowing her drink of choice, he figured it was a safe bet to bring whatever he was having and grabbed an extra beer out of the ice bucket he’d set up in the kitchen. On his way back, Joe found himself caught up greeting a variety of new guests, most of which he’d never seen before in his life. He was about to give a lame excuse about why he was needed back in the living room when an arm was slung over his shoulder and a familiar lopsided mohawk came into view. “So Lindsey, Joe says you’re a good person to have around at parties,” Cole called upon entering the room, all but throwing himself down onto the couch next to her. Chuckling, Joe handed her one of the beers and went to perch on the arm of the couch. “In case you haven’t figured it out, this is the Cole who was undoubtedly off being a weirdo. A lying weirdo, I said you were ‘decent’ to have at parties,” Joe smirked, sipping from his bottle.
Action/Reaction ✘ Joe&Lindsey
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fck-joe · 6 years ago
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cmlotz‌:
Oh wow put the pressure on will you, alright make it even more terrible if it doesn’t touch someone’s heart then you and I can never speak to each other. Or is that too awful and it’ll be bye bye Joe and Caity? I will admit I believed the theory after watching one of those conspiracy theory videos, then I called myself an idiot afterwards. Of course, you’ll always be safe with me giving you tips on what woman appreciate though I am sure you know all about that already right? You compared my safety to hot chocolate? I think that’s the funniest thing I have ever heard. I would love to do a random cake party, I think we need one honestly since it would guarantee to be the party of the year. Plus I have never been to a Jonas party before so that would be quite interesting. God who would put themselves being in a starving state. Take, that. Back! I am 32 so that sounds absolutely depressing.
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Pressure! Pushing down on me, pressing down on you no man ask for. Under pressure! I think this is all motivation to ensure that we don’t screw it up, if only so that we can keep the professional drinking team together. I mean some of the videos can be pretty convincing, so I can’t fault you there. It’s impressive what they can accomplish with a couple good clips. I do, but a few tips never hurt anyone. You’re welcome, I’m known for my comparisons. Name a date, we’ll make it real, it’s a crime that you’ve never been to a Jonas party. I can work on at least two-day notice. I-uh, it’s not really depressing— it’s a drawn-out, natural process. Besides, other aspects of your life make up for it. How am I doing? I feel like I’m making it worse.
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fck-joe · 6 years ago
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benhcrdys‌:
eh, i’ll give your suggestion a three out of five. i feel like that’s fair enough. yeah, really. we haven’t announced anything since it’s still decently early, but in a few months me and joe are going to be proud papa’s. i have a feeling that joe will end up being the fun dad, and i’ll end up be the more strict one.
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I can live with that score. Well, I’m honored to be one of the first to know, I swear I’ll keep it quiet — I won’t buy out the kid’s store until it’s reported in the papers. Seriously, congrats though, this is amazing. Eh, being strict isn’t too bad. My dad was strict as hell but we understood why he had to be that way. Besides, when you give the okay to do something crazy or impulsive, you’ll be more exciting than constantly fun Joe. 
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fck-joe · 6 years ago
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Despite the party having started less than fifteen minutes earlier, Joe’s flat was already filled with people, guests even spilling out onto the balcony adjoining his bedroom. He’d invited the other three members of DNCE under instructions to invite friends... who had consequently invited friends — not that he minded though. Considering how he’d yet to have anyone over, this was as good a house christening as any. Besides, having Cole Whittle at a party was the equivalent of throwing a rager. Hopefully they wouldn’t be receiving a noise complaint for at least another few hours.
Hearing a knock at the door, Joe made his way through the crowd to see who was there, opening it to reveal a very nicely dressed Lindsey Morgan. “Look who it is, glad you found the place alright,” he smiled, opening the door wider so that she could step into the foyer. He’d invited Lindsey partially to see if they could be civil enough to last a full party, but mainly because he knew how great she was at parties. Definitely a good time to have around when they weren’t fighting. Besides, Jinjoo was a secret fan of hers so it was a win for everyone. He’d just have to be on his best behavior, which he kept in mind as he led her into the living room where the 3/4ths of the band had camped out on the couch. “Guys, this is Lindsey,” he introduced, gesturing first to her and then to everyone who’d stopped to look “Lindsey, this is most of the band. Jack’s over there with his fiancé Helena, Jinjoo’s on the end, and Cole’s somewhere probably being a fucking weirdo. Can I get you anything to drink?”
Action/Reaction ✘ Joe&Lindsey
Lindsey had instantly jumped at the chance when Joe decided to invite her around to his place to hang out with him and the members of DNCE. She had been listening to their music for quite a while now, but never truly thought she would get the chance to meet them. She guessed it was the perks of being friends with some hot shot rockstar. Especially when Joe mentioned the word ‘party’ Lindsey became ecstatic, a chance to party with some famous people who she could probably bother with how they got the ideas for their songs seemed like a pretty awesome idea.
Dressed to impress Lindsey had made sure she knew correctly where she was going, but in the back of her mind getting lost along the way. She did fear for the outcome at this party since Joe was really the only one she knew here. And he wasn’t the best person to rely on, the friendship if they could call it that was very up and down. She could never tell if they were about to have a scrap at each other or just keep their mouths shut while trying not to piss each other off. It was actually quite an entertaining type of thing they had going, but if they ended up arguing tonight in front of DNCE… She might not be too impressed with it anymore. She hoped Joe hadn’t started drinking without her as she tapped a couple of times on the door only praying she had the right address.
@fck-joe
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fck-joe · 6 years ago
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michaelb-jordann‌:
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Questions about underwear just plan creepy my dude. I have had way too many of ‘em in my life time. Boxer briefs always and that’s on my momma. If I have to explain it or say it one more time, I’m gonna lose it. You might get a hot chicks number in a bra or two, so of course you say thank you and save that lace for post show. You are a Jo-Bro. You do whatever you want, including whoever you want.
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Start carrying around little business cards with all your info printed on them — height, favorite color, underwear preference, the whole deal so you never have to answer again. Yeah, but I’ve gotta say, that whole “Jo-Bro” lifestyle gets pretty old, back during our first run I could be a serious asshole. Like genuinely, sometimes I’m surprised people wanted to be around me.
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fck-joe · 6 years ago
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daniellenpanabaker‌:
I believe it. Even with something so ground-breaking? I thought for sure they would be beating down your door. Oh, how much time are we talking? 
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People are scared of the future, I don’t know what else to say. We’re thinking a mid-2020 rollout so we’d need a working product from you by March, at the latest.
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