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好萌…！

I have never played AC but the villagers are cute…

So here’s Artyom and Pavel purely for funsies

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[Tab] for notes

Note 1

亲爱的阿尔乔姆：

        兄弟，见字如晤。

过得怎么样？当你看到这封信时，我大概已经不在你身边了。不要难过，还记得我们宣誓过吗？从加入游骑兵的那天开始，一条命就任凭梅尔尼克摆布了。你不要生老头子的气，兄弟们的死不能怪他……

[字迹辨识不清]

……blyat！听着，你恨我也好，我实话实说，我从来没有相信过你，什么无线电，什么曙光城，兄弟，你还不懂吗，我们只是老鼠罢了，地铁里乌泱泱的一窝病鼠，子孙后代还是一窝病鼠，靠着蘑菇和其他老鼠的尸体存活，偶尔吞噬掉一两个站台，对不起，接着就被一把火烧掉。你是不同的，我知道，但我永远无法像你一样，就像老鼠永远生活在下水道里。我只是毫不起眼的配角。老头子也是，所以你不要生我们的气……

[字迹辨识不清]

……我也不知道为什么，但我会说的，当着梅尔尼克的面，在法庭上。不是为了什么“宁鸣而生，不默而死”，是为了你，阿尔乔姆。所以你大概是再也见不到我了。幸运的话，我会被老头子踹出游骑兵，跑到环线去给这帮兔崽子押送物资，或者到图拉站去擦地板。总之，再相见就很难了。但一句话，舍我其谁？兄弟，共勉。

        照顾好安娜，别故意去惹毛老头子。努力活下来！

  

2035.??.??

莱塔加

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Meme

When the order is out on a mission:

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God…my fav part of the book😭😭😭

METRO 2033: The Gospel According To Artyom

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omg🥵

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Tab to read the notes

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建设速写 partyom

The novel Artyom & Pavel who still gets good luck in redline missions

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喜欢的不得了

gimme kis

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Incorrect Tensimm quotes

Store Worker: Would a Mx. Doctor please come to the front desk? Doctor, arriving at the desk: Hello, is there a problem? Store Worker: points to Master and Jack Store Worker: I believe they belong to you? Master and Jack, simultaneously: We got lost :( Doctor: I didn’t even bring you guys here with me-

Doctor: *Screams* Master: *Screams louder to assert dominance* Jack: Should we do something?! Donna, observing: No, I want to see who wins this.

*Everyone is standing around the broken coffee maker* Doctor: So. Who broke it? I'm not mad, I just wanna know. Everyone: Master: ...I did. I broke it. Doctor: No. No you didn't. Jack? Jack: Don't look at me. Look at Donna. Donna: What?! I didn't break it. Jack: Huh, that's weird. How'd you even know it was broken? Donna: Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's broken. Jack: Suspicious. Donna: No, it's not! Rose: If it matters, probably not, but Martha was the last one to use it. Martha: Liar! I don't even drink that crap! Rose: Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier? Martha: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, Rose! Master: Okay let's not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, Doctor. Doctor: No! Who broke it!? Everyone: Rose: Doctor... Jack's been awfully quiet. Jack: rEALLY?! *Everyone starts arguing* Doctor, being interviewed: I broke it. I burned my hand so I punched it. Doctor: I predict 10 minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick. Doctor: Doctor: Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.

Doctor: Time for plan G. Master: Don’t you mean plan B? Doctor: No, we tried plan B a long time ago. I had to skip over plan C due to technical difficulties Jack: What about plan D? Doctor: Plan D was that desperate disguise attempt half an hour ago. Donna: What about plan E? Doctor: I’m hoping not to use it. Rose dies in plan E. Martha: I like plan E.

Doctor: I CAN'T DO IT! Master, laughing: I CAN'T EITHER! Doctor: I CANT FUCKING DO IT ANYMORE! Jack: WELL I'LL TELL YOU WHAT, YOU CAN EITHER GIVE UP NOW, OR YOU CAN FIGURE IT OUT. BECAUSE WE CERTAINLY CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT YOU, AND WE KNOW YOU CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT US. Doctor: Doctor: I appreciate it, Doctor: BUT LOOK WHAT WE'RE DEALING WITH- Donna: Doctor- Doctor: YOU GOTTA DRAW THE LINE SOMEWHERE! Rose: Doctor we gotta- Doctor: YOU GOTTA DRAW A FUCKING LINE IN THE SAND. YOU GOTTA MAKE A STATEMENT. Doctor: YOU GOTTA LOOK INSIDE YOURSELF AND SAY 'What am I willing to put up with today?' Doctor, motioning to Martha: NOT FUCKING THIS

Doctor, walking into their house: Hello, people who do not live here. Master: Hey. Jack: Hi. Donna: Hello. Rose: Hey! Doctor: I gave you the key to my place for emergencies only! Martha: We were out of Doritos.

Doctor: You lying, cheating, piece of shit! Master: Oh yeah? You’re the idiot who thinks you can get away with everything you do. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD Doctor: I’m leaving you, and I’M TAKING JACK WITH ME Donna, picking up the monopoly board: I think we’re gonna stop playing now.

Master: For self defense reasons, I'm going to pretend to be a burglar and you guys have to act wisely. Jack, Donna, & Doctor: Okay. Master: If you don't want to die, give me all your money. Jack: Bold of you to assume I have money. Donna: Bold of you to assume I don't want to die Doctor: Bold of you to assume I can die.

Master, singing to the tune of I Kissed a Girl: I killed a guy, and I liked it- Doctor, whispering: Should we call the exorcist? Jack, also singing:The taste of his cherry chapstick. Donna, appalled: Call the exorcist.

Doctor, singing to the tune of I Kissed a Girl: I killed a guy, and I liked it- Donna, whispering: Should we call the exorcist

Master, also singing:The taste of his cherry chapstick. Jack, appalled: Call the exorcist.

Doctor: I'm bored. Jack: Wanna commit first degree murder Doctor: Sure! Donna, hearing them: No- Stop, don't do that! Put that knife down! Put Master down!!

Martha: I’ve done a lot of dumb stuff. Master: I witnessed the dumb stuff. Donna: I recorded the dumb stuff. Jack: I joined you in the dumb stuff. Doctor: I TRIED TO STOP YOU FROM DOING THE DUMB STUFF!

Donna: Are we really going to let Doctor keep Master? Martha: We kept Jack.

Donna: Good morning. Master: Good morning. Martha: Good morning. Doctor: You all sound like robots, try spicing it up a bit. Jack: MORNING MOTHERFUCKERS!

Doctor: Guys, I’ve been meaning to tell you… Master and I are dating Master, Martha, Jack, and Donna: *gasp* Doctor: Master, why are you surprised?!

Jack: ....Thou shalt not marry each other, for thy art both sinful... Doctor: I just wanna fucking marry Master!!

Jack: Is this your plan B? Doctor: Technically, this is plan P. Jack: Plan P? Is there a plan M? Doctor: Yes, but I marry Master in plan M. Master: I like plan M.

Master: Someone take me to art museums and make out with me. Doctor: But they said not to touch the masterpieces. Master: Well somebody's got to pin the artwork to the wall. Jack, on a walkie talkie: This is Jack, those idiots are fucking around in the East wing again.

Master: I didn't drink that much last night. Jack: You were flirting with Doctor. Master: So what? They're my partner. Jack: You asked if they were single. Jack: And then you cried when they said they weren't.

Master: This date is boring! Doctor: This isnt a date. I said I was going to the store. Master: Then why did you invite me? Doctor: I didnt, I specifically said "dont come with me" then you said " fuck you Doctor I'll do whatever I want!

Jack: Hey Doctor, wanna third wheel on my date with Martha tomorrow? Doctor: Sure. Jack: Master! Wanna third wheel on my date with Martha tomorrow. Jack: Great! I've always wanted to go on a double date! Doctor & Master: ... Martha: Jack...

Master: Hey Jack, wanna third wheel on my date with Doctor tomorrow? Jack: Sure. Master: Martha! Wanna third wheel on my date with Doctor tomorrow? Master: Great! I've always wanted to go on a double date! Jack & Martha: ... Doctor: Master...

Martha: Why are your tongues purple? Doctor: We had slushies. I had a blue one. Master: I had a red one. Martha: oh. Martha: Martha: OH. Jack: Jack: You drank eachothers slushies?

Jack: *about Master and Doctor* They make a cute couple, huh? Martha: They certainly are standing next to each other.?

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笑得🤤

this is my opium magnum or whatever it’s called, behold

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笑得

They are trying to hang semi peacefully

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Hahah

One of my favourite things about the relationship between the Doctor and the Master is that you can kind of watch them grow old together as the show goes on, but instead of becoming better and more intelligent people, they just grow up to be even bigger idiots. They start out as these respectable gentlemen, a sort of Moriarty and Sherlock battle of wits dynamic, with sword fights and secret history. Then you go watch something from 30 seasons later and the Doctors in a red bull stained hoodie while he rides a tank and plays a rock solo on an electric guitar during a medieval gladiator tournament while the Master just rolls her eyes and smiles fondly. Love these two.

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Oh

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🥺

Two sides of the same coin.

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🥺🥺

yall ever think about all the pet names the master has for the doctor and

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xddd

the doctor: ily

the master, blushing furiously: uh. thanks

the master, later, to a very amused companion: THANKS. i said thanks.

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xddd

The Doctor, in TSoD, still trying to play it cool: “Let’s leave Earth together…so we can fight and battle and stuff.”

The Doctor, in EoT, having dropped literally all pretences: “Run away with me. We can explore the universe, just you and me. Please, let’s literally run away together.