fg-jae-blog

[fg-jae-blog]

fg-kang:

kang doesn’t like drinking, not when it makes him feel this good. it feels like a lie.   

he remembers through heat.

TW: mature content

the sun baking down on them, twelve year old boy smiles and the sounds of kicking footballs and cars honking making up the background of his youth. the way he fried under the stage lights at their first show, the warmth in his stomach from kang’s bright smile. the icy heat wave of embarrassment rushing over him when he groaned out “kang” into kim’s hair the first time they fucked, surpassing the fieriness of actually fucking for the first time, actually feeling something other than disappointment and hollowness. he doesn’t let himself feel freely that often, preferring a slow, anguishing but controlled boil. but now and then, with kang pressed against his side, a fever would blossom across his body and the boil would threaten to spill over and burn him away, exposing him to the world.

he sucked in a deep breath, thankful for kim’s advice to always wear his tightest pants to shows. “you never know who you’ll be taking home,” kim would warn and then flash a shit eating grin. there was a game being played there, one which jae knew nothing of the rules or players. he often felt like that with kim, out of his league and out of his depth. it was something he couldn’t keep track of, couldn’t unravel within himself and set right, like how the numbers in his arithmancy homework often slipped away. it always led back to them - kim and kang. they were enigmatic, but yet he knew them like brothers. jae had always centered his universe around kang, from the first time he saw him, but kim too had had a giant, planetary force that knocked jae out of orbit.  he had watched carefully, observing their sultry, engrossing chemistry that engulfed all in their path. it made their band successful, women crazy, and men jealous. but, he had not been so careful as to not be dissolved into it, icarus to the sun, a moth to a flame. and oh, had he burned.

he felt the same sensation, the scorching of his skin, as kang breathed against his neck. “fuck,” kang said, his weight becoming even heavier against jae’s side. he huffed; anyone else, he would have just left and found something that involved less responsibility and less clothes to fill his night with. but this was kang, so all he could do was express a little displeasure at the situation. of course, he wasn’t drunk enough to try and argue that he was completely displeased. but there wasn’t enough tequila in the world to convince him that this is what life could be like, sans alcohol, sans kim involvement. kang laughing almost into his ear, the intoxicating smell of sweat, alcohol, and a show hanging off of him. he might act like this with kim, but jae was everything not kim, and therein lied jae’s problem, didn’t it? “how much did you have to drink?” he wanted to come across as scolding - did kang even know how many people would take advantage of this kind of situation, did jae even know? however, it landed with much more concern than he would have let drip through sober.

the way kang slurs yours shouldn’t have excited him like it did, stirring up dust at the bottom of his gut, a fatal mixture of sensuality, apprehension, and self loathing. it keeps stirring despite kang’s admonition of sharing a bed with kim. jae was no stranger to that, after all; kim always stole all the blankets but jae wouldn’t mind, a heat spell enchanting his body from shame. it was a different kind of heat than the one know, where he felt out of control and reckless, kang’s body heat, words, just his total being totally overwhelming. he wanted to respond with a warning, a way of setting up a wall, a if you vomit in my bed, i’ll kill you, but instead he choked out a too soft and too vulnerable, “ok,” and tried to angle them towards the dungeon before kang begins stumbling.

jae was neither a demon nor a saint, just a simple sinner, so he watched kang stumble before sighing, extending his right hand. “here,” he gestured wildly and impatiently, angry with himself and kang and the situation. he turned his head away, hiding his flushed face and inappropriately tight pants before he adds, “let’s go, then.”

[fg-jae-blog]

it always ends like it began, just the two of them, young and dumb and smelling like sweat.

jae had to have known better, but he also knew that knowing better would never land him in a situation like this, with kang’s hair in his face and tucked into his side. he should have been able to see this outcome earlier, when he was on stage, bright lights piercing his skin and his hair halfway in his eyes. but he was blinded by fame and smoke and rock n roll. he mingled in the after party, as much as jae ‘mingled’, letting everyone give him a drink of this or that. he hadn’t been paying attention to kang, or really any of the other guys in the band, knowing they were probably trying to have as good of a time as he was. but he should have known, should have paid attention, should have been smarter and wiser.

he was and continued to be a stupid, stupid man.

the show had mainly cleared out by the time he had seen the rest of them - kim and kang and all of his friends, drunk and bleary but still hyped up from their set. it was always electrifying, that feeling of being the focus of everything, of the vibration of his guitar, his music, across his being. almost as electrifying as taking in the sight of flushed kang, drunkenly hanging off of kim, rambling about something that happened in the after party. jae doesn’t smile, but he figures his amicable nod is enough as he enters the foray. on stage, they are all a band, but here, they are just friends. his family. and kang. he finds his place naturally in the circle, the final piece in a broken puzzle. everyone looks ready to leave, their gear long since packed up and sweat dried on their faces. they all look happy, or at least pleased, in jae’s case, but kim has a knowing smirk on his face that lights the blood under jae’s skin on fire. “we’re all about to head out,” kim drawls easily, pausing to look at kang. “can you handle this?”

jae hates his knowing eyes, and mostly he hates that kim does know. he knows everything that jae has bottled up and packed away, a suitcase for a vacation he’ll never take. jae hates that he’s so predictable, when he nods at kim, letting kang slip off of kim’s shoulder and onto his. jae can and will handle it, because at the end of the day, it was always comes down to the two of them. that’s all he’s wanted, right? he exits the room of requirement, kang in tow, to the sound of kim’s laughter.

“kang?” he asks, softly as he dares. he’s usually made up of all angles and concrete, but here there is something silken, fragile, and delicate. “do you want to go to your room or mine?”

@fg-kang

[fg-jae-blog]

hi guys wat’s up!!!!!! i’m bailey, a trash lord, and this is my garbage king, jae won moon. he’s a big bitch™ but it’s ok because he’ll probably still make out with you.

the best way i can describe jae is a really wet cat. he's v reserved, v bitchy, and v judgmental. even his closest friends he keeps at a distance, and even though he is capable of feeling the full spectrum of human emotion, he's very controlling on what he shows to the public. so he's basically constantly emotionally stunted and really sassy. he can also be hella manipulative, since he’s super in control of what he expresses and doesn’t. he doesn't really act like he likes anyone, and he honestly only likes music and straight guys so i mean.. not wrong. he's part of a band, but he has his own little emo soundcloud situation going right now, and might be getting his own solo career? think: frank ocean but with childish gambino lyrics. but hush it's a secret, just like everything else in his life. most likely to sleep with your girlfriend then try to sleep with you when you try to fight him over it. a true bi icon.

friends. jae, like i said, is super reserved and not friendly in the least bit. however, if you can deal with someone being bitchy/sassy to you until you gain his limited trust, then you will have a friend for life. jae is very loyal to his friends, and even though he doesn’t trust them completely and doesn’t let anyone see the real jae TM, he is v ride or die. outside of his band, i imagine he has a couple of friends, especially his roomies from hogwarts and people who frequent the coffee shop he works at. however, you’re never going to be best friends with him and he’s definitely always going to be a sourpuss. proceed with caution.

enemies. jae hates everyone and everyone hates jae. besides people that don’t like his band (read kang’s wanted ad), he really doesn’t like people that: try too hard, play quidditch, or are too cheery all the time. he doesn’t like overly friendly people, and he’s constantly a bitch to everyone so honestly i wouldn’t be surprised if most people wished he would die. he gets into fist fights a lot, whether it be because he thinks you’re talking shit about his friends or because he slept with your girlfriend.. or boyfriend.. or whatever. also, people probably don’t appreciate that he’s shit at his job and a big whiny baby.

lovers. jae will sleep with anyone!!!! he’s constantly horny, the mad man. he sleeps with women and men, but his preference is women who scare him and straight guys that are curious about getting it on with a dude. he’s very emotionally unavailable obviously, so it’s mainly one night stands and then he pretends he doesn’t know you when he sees you next. he’s dated a couple of people, but never for very long because once they find out he’s in love with his straight best friend and unable to get over that, they pretty quickly get over it. however, i do want an andy to his april (since he is a humanoid cat).

and here are my plot ideas

other people in remedial classes at hogwarts. they probably do like a summer study group, and jae constantly tells everyone how stupid they are, despite the fact he is 100% the worst with school work. this includes tutors and other academically disinclined peeps. most of these people would probably be his friends???? but he would never admit it and they probably think he hates them lol.

his coworkers/frequent visitors to bean’s coffee shop. his coworkers probably hate him because he constantly shows up late, really can’t do his job, and either flirts with or insults every single customer. frequent visitors are probably just like wow how are you so incompetent? and then he broodily remakes their macchiato for the fiftieth time because he doesn’t remember how to make one.

fans of his soundcloud who think he’s super dreamy and romantic and nice, but then meet the real thing and are SEVERELY disappointed. or really into that, if you’re into being belittled and condescended to.

i want him to get a boyfriend that constantly comes to the coffee shop and is a soft poet boy who sees the best in him (which is v little). they should be like andy dwyer, but smart, bc jae is just april but stupid as hell. i just want this sourpuss to have a beautiful romance and be able to be soft and like take the stick out of ass around someone.

awkward flings that are like why didn’t you call????? and jae is just like peace out and disappears lmao

people who want to get drunk and/or high and/or just fuck around with someone who is a major downer

honestly i’m up for anything and so is jae thanks for reading baes!!!!!

[fg-jae-blog]

Frank Ocean; Ivy 

[fg-jae-blog]