ficto-confessions

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I FINALLY HAVE A HUMAN F/O AND S/I WHICH MEANS I CAN USE ALL THOSE COUPLES PICREWS?!?!?!? IVE NEVER BEEN ABLE TO USE THEM

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Sorry if my question seems dumb.

How do I feel less cringe when showing my F/Os or talking about them?

I love them dearly but every time I speak of them or show them I'm so embarrassed and I can't stop cringing

Don't know how to answer this, sorry.

Maybe the comments could help (if any appear here)👇

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long story short I loved my f/o so much I believe in him now. if you feel similar, you're not alone. I lived for years thinking I was the only person who had beliefs like this, that I was simply crazy, until I heard about pop culture paganism and pop culture magic. PCM varies from person to person, from using Pokemon cards to represent the elements in an otherwise traditional ritual, to working with or worshipping arceus as an actual deity. for me it means working with an egregore, a being created by the collective thought energy of a group, in this case a fandom, of my once f/o, now just other (though I acknowledge that he and his source are still fictional, they just spawned an egregore). not trying to convert anyone just telling people they're not alone.

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I really want to talk about my silly Warriors ship but I'm way too embarrassed to talk about it on my main so I'm doing it here.

I have two AUs with him! I'm not saying who he is, just that he's a ThunderClan cat.

AU 1 is just my self-insert (I do not ship my human self with a cat, we are both cats, please do not be weird about this) born into ThunderClan around the same time, basically a friends to lovers thing. It erases a lot of canon events but I don't care!

AU 2 is where we're from different Clans (he's still ThunderClan, but I'm from ShadowClan) and he eventually leaves to come live with me.

I use two different self-inserts for this.

I know this is so stupid but I've been doing this since I was twelve and I don't intend to give it up now. Sometimes I just want to be kitty cat and have kitty cat problems.

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I used to headcanon that my f/o as well as my oc smoke cigars or cigarettes, but ever since my dad started smoking more I’ve stopped doing that. He used to never smoke, to only after big fights with my mom, to only while on business trips (he doesn’t know I can see the pack of cigarettes in his work bag or the growing pile of cigarette butts in unused plant pots), to nearly all the time. He also fights with my mom more often and she often brings up divorce. I also notice he feels a bit tense after he smokes which worries me. I just now associate it and the smell of it with fighting and instability in work-life balance and poor relationships. So that’s why I don’t do that anymore.

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I’m in a bit of a moral dilemma. I think I’m decently left wing I think. The only belief that really would be relevant to share is that I’m anti capitalist. Capitalism has also affected my race very badly. However, my f/o is capitalistic to the maximum. He might be caring and sweet and wonderful, but he’s pretty much the embodiment of and does everything negative to come with capitalism. He also kidnaps people a lot, and is part of a company who wants to turn the main characters’ home into a business district. Obviously I do not like him for this. I think it’s important that I make sure I don’t condone his actions. I purposely made my s/i flawed (and even less left wing) for liking him and I love to spin him around in my head and ask him “what the actual fuck is wrong with you. Why are you such a boot licker. What goes on in that brain of yours”. But sometimes when I imagine my selfship and feel genuine love for my f/o, I feel really guilty for that. I’m currently going through a very difficult situation that has been lasting for almost 2 years. I’ve been affected by depression and intrusive thoughts throughout that time too. My f/o is typically the only thing that brings me happiness and joy when everything else fails. I love him a lot. He’s wonderful really. But I feel like a bad person for finding that comfort within him and I worry not only my fandom sees me that way, but also the selfship community as well as potentially more left wing mutuals. Am I in the wrong? Also I get very serious about this but at the end of the day it’s a kids game. It’s a game designed to emulate kids games. The only serious lore moments are like few and far between or are going to be cut from canon soon.

TLDR: my f/o is a very very bad person, and I feel bad for loving him. Am I in the wrong?

Well, I don't have a say in this since I dont give a damn about politics but let's say don't bring political views when it comes to f/os & attraction since its not a good idea./lh

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I love my husband Hancock. I am playing Fallout4 and currently have a mod installed where I can stay in his house. I am decorating it and making it all nice for us. We get together every playthrough. He means so much to me.

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sighhhhh i think i have a Crush. on a Girl Character. feel a bit nervous about being a dude falling in love with a woman because a). people are probably gonna assume i'm straight (i'm bisexual and also a trans man. neither cis nor het), b). all my other f/os are male so having a girl as an f/o is a first for me, and c). i think a lot of people headcanon her as a lesbian and i feel like people are gonna be weird or mean to me over that. then again im probably overthinking this way too much (many such cases. i overthink and get scared way too often) and i should just Man Up and Smooch That Lady. world's queerest straight couple

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My irl boyfriend is a wizard I think because he's guessed three characters he thought I would like and all three have become f/os. It's a curse, if he thinks I'll like them he is probably correct.

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i dont know if this is allowed here because i guess its some sort of drama, and confession blogs tend to not allow that. i just need to get it off my chest somewhere because its genuinely causing me a lot of stress, to a point where ive been unable to sleep at night a lot

lately, there's been someone going around in discord servers with ficto/selfship/yume focusus accusing me of being a proshipper, lolicon, something along those lines i think i dont even know the specifics. i dont even know why, i dont know who this person is, and i've never even seen them before until i found out about this happening, but i assume that they're a grown adult because they've been doing this in 18+ servers.

dont you have better things to do than go around spreading lies about people?

and what the hell did i even do to you?? i dont even know you.

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I’ve had a slight crush/squish on a certain character for a few days that’s getting shipped with another certain character to the point where their ships tag is trending on tumblr and as someone who is uncomfortable with doubles due to stuff like trauma this is actually the worst I cannot imagine anything to do with my self insert because I keep thinking of the painfully obvious doubles ship whenever I try to listen to music or come up with anything or even read imagines and I feel selfish for feeling this jealous when I haven’t even been in the fandom for a week😭😭😭 I’m actually very upset and feel very bad about it though

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My f/o is pretty niche, only getting art every now and then. Unfortunately, I’m too scared to look at his tag, because another and much, MUCH better artist started selfshipping with him and has been posting their art in his main tag. I feel too embarrassed to block them, as I previously followed them and they even credited my Headcanons for my f/o with inspiring their art, but with how awful my mood swings and general mental state has been I cannot stand the thought of sharing my f/o. I feel like my f/o wouldn’t want to be with me because I’m not a good artist and because of my mental state. I feel so worthless.

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I can never relate to people who say "omg I'd HATE my F/O if they were real" or "I'd never get with my F/O IRL". As someone who's both Fictoromantic and Fictosexual it feels like I've been with my F/Os for several months already, sooo. Yeah I absolutely would date them if they were real. "But they're so flawed-" and?? Do we not love people regardless of their flaws anymore? Like I get if they're a villain or something it might make stuff more complicated but I fell for them for a reason, I genuinely love them and would be ecstatic if they could be my IRL partners

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I might be fictoromantic/sexual, I think, because before my first ever irl relationship, I only wanted to be in relationships with fictional characters. Now I hold my main F/Os as high as I hold my irl spouse and our child. They are super important to me, and I see them as real partners to me as my spouse. My spouse even supports me and even sends me stuff of my F/Os. They spent hours trying to find the newest episode of my F/Os source material for me.

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My mom saw I was in the process of decorating my room, and she started talking to me about my family refurbishing my room. She commented on how none of my furniture works together, which I agree with. So I tell her that we can replace my old furniture with new furniture in the same place. But she said that wouldn’t be a refurbishment, and that’s when I understood what she was saying. She meant taking down all of my posters, rearranging all of my furniture placements, molding everything to conform to what my mom and dad like. Lots of space, minimalistic, and modern, which I am the complete opposite of.

This made me pretty upset, because my room is my space, I mean they call it my room for a reason. The last time something like this happened without my permission, where my family replaced a dresser in my room, I started crying. I like coming back to an unchanged, but still controllable place as an autistic person with all of my favorite things in it. My life has been god awful this past year, with school issues, horrible mental health, attempting suicide, getting outed as trans to my unsupportive family by a close friend who had normalized stalking and manipulation further for me, and one of the ways I first started coping with my shit life this year was redecorating my room to look nice. I feel like less and less things are in my control as I get older, and more people leave me because I can’t control things such as my neurodivergence, mental state, or the fact that I’m dealing with my emotions horribly. I feel like I have no control over my life or my body, and even though I have friends, I don’t think my family actually likes them or think they are good influences on me (because I am autistic and a lot of my friends are trans and “autistic people are easily influenced” so yeah you can see where that’s going) So it’s nice to have one thing I can control and come back to. And then my family, who I feel have given up on me completely at this point, just come in and say that they want to completely tear down my room to conform to what they want this summer…. It makes me feel less like a person and more like a doll that life and other people in it get to play house with.

When I was voicing my watered down, kiddie, simplified opinion to my mother, which was simply that I liked my room the way it is and that I don’t want to change it, my tone changed slightly. My mother instantly noticed, looking annoyed. In a rushed way she said goodnight to me, and left my room. I was basically paralyzed for the next five minutes, feeling completely abandoned and that nothing was in my control. The only way I snapped out was remembering that someone can’t exactly abandon you if they had already left when you needed them most because you were literally planning a suicide attempt six months ago.

So I crawled into bed, emotionally exhausted. I plugged my phone in, planning on falling asleep. I looked around my colorful, lovely, safe room I liked being in, and it hit me that I was gonna probably lose it all in the next month and a half. And I almost started crying, which is really not great, because I hardly ever openly express sadness anymore due to emotional suppression. So I only start crying if I really feel it. I was also angry at myself and my family. I was going to start thrashing in anger, hitting pillows and the wall and my mattress, scrunching blankets, but when I turned around I was weighed down by my grey weighted blanket.

I immediately thought of my f/o, and imagined talking to him, around the time I would move into his house and start sleeping in the same bed. I imagined him asking me if there would be anything I would like to put in our room, and I would say as the chronic people pleaser I am “whatever you want is fine” to him. Obviously he wouldn’t take that for an answer and after a little bit I tell him about how after i (hypothetically in the future. It’s really likely though. I have no control over my life anymore, so what’s to expect. I’m also projecting onto my oc (it’s just convenient to use 1st person on him) he’s like 34 he’s not my age at all.) came home one day from school and saw that his room had completely been changed by his family with his posters and art and bags and charms and shelves with figures being stripped from his walls and his cozy bed that clung to the wall put out in the open with new, unpleasant and unfamiliar furniture and with his plushies moved around strangely and all of his trinkets and crafts thrown away and how absolutely devastated he was because he had lost one of the few things he had control over.

Obviously upset at what had happened to his husband, my f/o assures him that he will never ever do that and asks again what I want on in OUR room, and also encourages him to look around at what’s already in the room for ideas. I start listing off lots of cutesy things I already have in my real room, as well as things like a giant dog bed (cuz they’re MAD comfy) and movie posters. This led to me talking to f/o about who framed Roger rabbit for like a good 15 minutes. Imagined montage of me shopping and bringing out old furniture and posters and frames and all things cutesy and pink and frilly ensues. At the end it’s just contrasting with his art deco aesthetic so strangely yet well and us being so happy at the end and agreeing that we complement each other perfectly. we are so tired of installing furniture and shopping and taping prints and pushing thumbtacks and putting up shelves and putting back together figures and cleaning and dusting and washing and tidying up again that we both collapse into bed together, tired out of our minds. Before I shut my eyes, I mumble out a loving, genuine, ‘thank you’. I curl up to him, purring softly in my sleep, grateful that some like him exists, and that he’s my boyfriend on top of that!

I love him and I’m so lucky to have him ❤️

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As a fictoromantic guy who considers himself aroace when it comes to real people, finding aro spaces where I can relate is... hard. A lot of it is "I don't need anyone, zero romance whatsoever, get it away from me, I don't like it at all and am above such things". Which, of course, I fully recognize is just exaggerated jokes and not to be taken seriously. It's just that it's the most popular joke I see, and I really can't relate to it. Most accounts or stories I read are about rejecting the idea of romance and going against it altogether. And if that makes the individual happy, then I'm very happy for them! I just don't find those widely spread sentiments something I can connect to in any way. I like romance with my fictional boyfriends and husbands. I love them more than anything, they're on my mind 24/7, they give me all those romantic feelings and that makes me very very happy. So when the idea is that aro people don't like love, are against it, or just don't have any connections to it whatsoever, I feel kinda out of place. I still consider myself gay since I'm a man attracted to only men, just only fictional men. So when I see those statements I try to rewrite it in my head as "to me this only applies to real people but not my fictional men" but it's just not the same y'know? It's not the same as seeing more representation for aros who have a healthy relationship with romantic love and might even still be attached to it in some way. Especially ficto people.

Tbh I'm fictoromantic too but since I know ppl target the romantic attraction or any kind towards real ppl,I pretty much still relate to the "Ew romance",content & don't change it so it would fit my identity.

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I feel stupid. I’m an artist and usually I’m really good at it, being asked to make art as gifts of to teach younger grades at my school things like lineart and color theory. I have won a few contests and have been featured in an auction, a magazine, multiple school newsletters, etc. However, my f/o is difficult for me to draw. I want to make beautiful art like everyone else who draws him but I feel my art looks horrible compared to others. I want to draw us so badly. You have no idea how many beautiful drawings I have in mind I cannot create because I can’t draw him. I feel like a fraud, like I can never channel or show how much I love him. Like I don’t try enough for him. Like I don’t love him because I can’t draw him. I love him so, so much and I breaks my heart every time I can’t draw him. Does he think I love him, even if every drawing I make of his beautiful self look like a strange mockery of his body?

I can't draw any of my f/os either,so I guess that's normal.