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It's so unfair, and I hate to sound like I'm whining. But it kills me. It kills me to know I intertwined my life with yours. Forever. I can't stand you. You think it's fine to examine every aspect of my life, my body. You think it's normal to watch my every move. I hate you. I just do. Some days, it's not so burning. But it's always there.

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I am wasted. In full Adam Sandler eating pickles out the jar in public, I don't give a fuck mode. I'm unkept. I'm a little dirty. Like I said, drrrunk. I'm home, people are over. I'm comfy and don't care. When people invite others over, I usually don't care. Don't even bother me to ask. If you can vouch for them, I'm good.

Someone brought over "B". I think his name is Brian, but to me he's "the fray". Can't explain it, but that's how I save his name in my phone. We hang out, I'm a fun drunk. I'm a little louder than usual, but I keep my wits about me pretty well. I like this one. He's cute and funny. I keep touching his arm because it's skinny but strong. He seems skinny but strong, and not in an obtuse way. More like, he's active, uses his body to get shit done. My kinda shit. We hang out. Hard. Talk all night until his friends take him, he's from out of town and has to go.

I'm at an event. This is a nice event, my friends get us in spitting distance of an orchestra. There's infinity pools up around the balconies and the place is illuminated from no particular source. It's gorgeous. We're all looking good. I'm in cute sandals because I usually don't do heels, but the ground is a bit wet so my ass is seated. Sandals do not have traction footing. I'm in awe of the music. I get goosebumps when they start to play. They call for "silence" from this balcony audience.. some of my friends are highly improper and untrained animals. It's embarrassing, but I silently laugh too. The moments pass. I'm in love. I love music, I'm entranced. My friends get up and start to mingle, I'm just watching the conductor and musicians. Suddenly, he's just there. Seated on the grass in front of me, little to the left. I grab my phone and immediately text him. "Are you free after this?" Before I get a response, before I look up from my phone, he says "Well you certainly look a lot different." We start walking around, I'm acting shy. I'm very glad I did my hair and put on my favorite perfume and got my nails done. I like him seeing this side of me. I'm sure it's quite a shock. He's here to shoot the orchestra, but also has to get some pictures taken. He looks at me, he's blushing. He pulls me in to a hug, and I don't let go. My arms are around his neck, I'm tall but it's still a stretch. Now I'm in this hug for too long, and it's awkward if I don't make a move. I pull my face back just enough to kiss him. He pulls me so tight into him that we crash a bit into the wall behind him. When we finally let go, it's bliss. It also just feels normal. Like we had always kissed. I go to start walking down the steps but my slippery sandals betray me. He grabs me by the waist before I fall. I turn and smile at him, but he says "Don't smile at me like that until we're both on solid ground please".

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Embroidery Wall Art and Brooches

Shimunia on Etsy

See our #Etsy or #Embroidery tags

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The reason some girls wear make up..

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this is iconic

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GOALS

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“I ask for, not at once no government, but at once a better government. Let every man make known what kind of government would command his respect, and that will be one step toward obtaining it.”

— Henry David Thoreau, Civil Disobedience

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“I wandered about in rapture, borrowed books by the armload, and became known to the librarians. I liked to inhabit books, devour them. Reading seemed so similar to eating, to consumption. I didn’t like to eat now unless there was a book open by my plate.”

— Nayomi Munaweera, Island of a Thousand Mirrors (via a-ramblinrose)

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always be honest with your intentions, considerate with your words, and kind with your actions.

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Say Anything (1989)

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“Until we have begun to go without them, we fail to realize how unnecessary many things are. We’ve been using them not because we needed them but because we had them.”

— Seneca, Moral Letters to Lucilius

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“Even though it will never stop hurting, what happened to him, it will get better some day; with the right amount of time and the right combination of people. It will still burn like crazy, but the heat of it will come in and out like a radio signal and he’ll learn to live in the spaces in between.”

— Jennifer E. Smith, Windfall

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- Feelings -

by Pedro Gabriel

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“Integrity is choosing courage over comfort; choosing what is right over what is fun, fast, or easy; and choosing to practice our values rather than simply professing them.”

— Brené Brown, Rising Strong