finalflinguk

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Only Human... the next chapter

Only Human… the next chapter

Practice what you preach

After 10 years developing Final Fling as a platform for end of life planning, I’m onto a new project… Only Human… funeral directing and Humanist celebrancy.

I want to spend less time in the virtual space of online, digital and advance planning and more time in the real space of delivering funerals and ceremonies.

The individuals, couples and families I work with…

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Living life to the full - right to the end

Living life to the full – right to the end

Julie, age 9

Today, as Final Fling is in wind-down mode, a user based in New York, Fiona shares how the site helped her family – especially her sister – when her sister was dying.

There was something about the very name “Final Fling” that encapsulated Julie’s approach to her “bonus years”. 

Fiona, Julie’s sister

“My younger sister, Julie, introduced me to Final Fling.  She had ‘life-…

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Handing over the Final Fling baton

Handing over the Final Fling baton

I’m delighted to have teamed up with a couple of friends in the field to offer Final Flingers a secure alternative for their onward journey.

As users know, I will be closing Final Fling at the end of May. Time for change. No drama.

Final Fling alternatives

Once I’ve Gone and Biscuit Tin are two alternative platforms that have similar offers to Final Fling, with secure digital spaces for…

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And finally... a few kind words

And finally… a few kind words

Fling Founder, B (right), with Hilary Peppiette, death doula, at the Scottish Funeral Awards.

I’m all about meaningful rites of passage. Small or large rituals to mark changes in life. As part of my own rite of passage to mark the process of winding down Final Fling, I want to share some of the lovely tributes I’ve been enjoying this month since I let users know that for me, it’s time for change.

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A little knowledge goes a long way - a DIY funeral

A little knowledge goes a long way – a DIY funeral

This is a lovely share from Ana, who used Final Fling and other resources to give her the knowledge, agency and power to get the send-off she and her parents wanted, without all the rigmarole:

My parents wanted to plan their own funerals

“Many years ago, my parents decided that they would like to plan their funerals. We are a practical and not at all religious. They wanted a simple, cheap…

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Final Fling - a user's tale

Final Fling – a user’s tale

Pauline c.63

Thanks to Fling user, Pauline Tait, for taking time to write a personal tribute to Final Fling for the job it has done to help people engage with end of life planning. Take it away, Pauline.

Thanks Final Fling

“I would like to thank Barbara for creating Final Fling, for opening up rational discussions about death and dying and providing the tools to plan for the inevitable.

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Finale Fling

I hit another big milestone in March. If the world was normal, I would have my bus pass by now and be taking me and my white hair on jaunts. As it happens, they’re not issuing bus passes and there’s nowhere to go.

I think about all the other people missing out on small and big rites of passage moments. Last day at primary school… graduation… funerals.

It’s also made me think about my next…

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Using lockdown productively for end of life planning

Dot Merriott on her wedding day in ’74

I’ve had a lovely connection with a Flinger over the past few weeks and I thought it worth sharing as a prompt to doing useful things with pockets of free time.

Dot Merriott just reached the end of her first year using Final Fling. She had received a wee ‘birthday wishes’ message from me, hoping she was enjoying using the website. I always ask for…

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Things to do to avoid the shock of death

I’m not going to engage in the drama too much right now. Just wanted to suggest 5 things you can do right now to be ahead of the game.

Set up a Final Fling account – always free.

Get a Will in place. I have an adviser I can plug you into if you’re stuck.

Get Powers of Attorney in place in case you become unable to make your own decisions.

Know what you want for your funeral– start with how much…

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Death looms large - the Covid effect

Death looms large – the Covid effect

I decided in the Covid-19 lock-down period not to get involved in scaremongering or engage in drama about death.

My partner’s mum died from a cold in December. This wasn’t reported anywhere. It didn’t add to a daily count; it wasn’t publicised in headlines reporting on the number of old folks who slip away every winter. Talk to any funeral director or celebrant and they’ll tell you what a…

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Digital legacies rule

Like mother like daughter

OK, I love an actual artefact – the touchy-feely real things in life, but there’s a lot to be said for the power of digital – especially when it comes to digital legacies. You just have to take a look at this old photo to see how much an artefact can diminish over time.

This black and white photo (above) did not enjoy being in a frame, behind glass. I never…

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Join the coffin club

Join the coffin club

Picture Copyright http://www.chriswatt.com

I ordered my own coffin in 2012. I hadn’t realised I was joining a global revolution. It turns out, on the other side of the globe, in 2011, a group of active retirees in New Zealand began to happily meet up at the Coffin Club. They make friends, have a laugh and handcraft their own coffins.

My coffin in the basement

I ordered my coffin for…

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Last rites and plain talking

Last rites and plain talking

I live my life as a Humanist and get my spiritual highs from nature, loving relationships and the joy of being human, with all our frailties. I don’t feel any loss as a result of not having a religious practice.

That is, until recently, when I came across something for the first time that I thought I’d like to adapt and bring into my life. The practice of Last Rites.

Signalling the end

I…

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A fond farewell

We had a family Final Fling this month – a fond farewell. A good goodbye. It really was a wonderful celebration of a life well-lived.

After all the years I’ve been encouraging others to plan ahead, it really was a joy to be delivering a funeral that had been thought-through and owned – by the person who had died and the family.

I remember the night we sat round the kitchen table 5 or so…

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Memory quilt

Friend of Fling, Ailsa, shared a lovely idea for remembering and we think it could help in the space of loss and remembering without burdening. Let’s say, we think it has legs…

It can be a challenge sorting through the remains of a life. What to keep; what to let go. It can feel painful not to keep everything… as if letting go means someone else’s wee treasures and ephemera didn’t matter. And…

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Funeral parlours licensed like tattoo parlours

Funeral parlours licensed like tattoo parlours

Scottish Government is introducing a statutory Code of Practice, an inspection programme and a licensing scheme for funeral businesses as part of a regulatory framework to ensure high standards of service. They’ll be working on implementation over 2019/20.

In their consultation and investigation they drew an interesting parallel comparing the funeral parlour business model and the wide…

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WATER CREMATION – ONE ANSWER TO CLIMATE CRISIS

WATER CREMATION – ONE ANSWER TO CLIMATE CRISIS

(Sandy age 3 between 2 big brothers – youngest of 11)

If you’ve been watching BBC’s Years and Years– a near-future view of our world – you may have seen the funeral in episode 3 where the chat goes (to paraphrase) ‘this isn’t a normal crematorium you know, it’s an aquatorium’.

Fire or water?

Turns out, given the option, 80% of people asked would choose water cremation over flame…