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was chatting with friends about taste in partners, I said I wanted someone whose weaknesses I could cover and vice versa (I get things off tall shelves, they say I ordered no pickles) and we could sort of mutually protect each other.
these motherfuckers were like "this guy's got a party composition kink"
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Toddlers are so pure. She doesn’t understand that we help her with certain things because she’s little. She thinks that everyone just helps each other like that. So she tries to blow on my food and cut it up for me and tries to help me put on my shoes.
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Chai tea bag + lil but of brown sugar + apple cider packet + 16 oz. mug of hot but not quite boiling water
it will not Fix You but like. maybe. maybe.
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op turned off reblogs due to getting harassed over this post but i agree with this too hard .m y post now
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You are a villain famous for “killing” heroes. In reality, heroes come to you to fake their deaths.
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op turned off reblogs due to getting harassed over this post but i agree with this too hard .m y post now
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if you’re white and wanna write a poc character and feel awkward about it i implore you to ignore any twitblr stuff treating it as a massive ethical burden and instead come in more with the same mindset you’d have if you wanted to write about idk firefighters but didn’t know anything about firefighters so you do... research. Like fuck off with the weird kinda creepy calls for spiritual introspection you’re not writing about god damn space aliens you’re writing about humans and if you think you need more perspective of different life experiences just read?
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op turned off reblogs due to getting harassed over this post but i agree with this too hard .m y post now
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i put “All I Want for Christmas is You” through a MIDI converter, and then back through an mp3 converter
the result is this garbage
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i swear to god i actually pay attention in class
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