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My boyfriend won’t stop talking to me about whether or not I would eat Pokémon steaks. We think maybe Mr. Mime steaks would have white meat and ooze a purple liquid. I feel like you’re the only one qualified to tell us more

listen the ONLY part of a mr mime thats edible are the red spots, and thats ONLY after being properly cooked - if you bite into any part of their body while its still raw youll suffer near immediate food poisoning

luckily, just like red kidney beans, the potential toxins are easily to remove provided you take the right steps

once theyve been safely removed from their inedible surroundings, the larger red spheres are ready to begin working with - its worth noting that the smaller spots on the hands and cheeks also fall into this category, but theyre almost always too small to be considered harvesting by most professionals 

youll want to start by cutting away any flesh thats still directly touching the pale parts; when in doubt, a wider cut is always preferred. better safe than sorry ! one benefit of working with mr mimes is that, along with many others in their typing, their bodies are held together with physic energy and thus dont require deboning

the next part is going to require boiling in a large pressure cooker- some may find it a challenge to to find a pot big enough to host all the parts, so cooking them individually is fine. remember to follow the instructions to the letter

after theyve been removed and dried, an easy way to text if theyre safe to eat is to cut them in half and check the spongy center - a darkened purple core means theyve been boiled long enough, while any lighter, greenish tints means you probably needed a bit more time

once theyre out of the danger range, you can now safely use them in variety of dishes ! their almost mushroom-like texture means they absorb flavors well, and pictured above is one of my personal favorites

THIS guy though, you can just pop em into your mouth whole. its fine

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There's a lot going on here.

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It’s Pride Month Eve, so leave out some milk for Freddie Mercury and his cats.

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Looking at the life I left behind, to living these beautiful moments truly shows how life can change. I've never been more in love. I don't know if I've ever been happier. I can't help those who don't want it, but I can't worry about them either. I deserve this, to be this overwhelmingly happy

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Being truly cared about and seen has made me realize things that I never truly understood about myself. I think parts of me are healing that I didn't know were damaged

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I can't sleep

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It's so interesting how my own mind tries to sabotage me. I'm happy, but my intrusive thoughts try to find every loophole that it can to make me doubt. I never had realized I was paranoid and delusional until last year, Borderline is such a mess. I'm fighting it tooth and nail, and thankfully she understands that my paranoia around her comes from my own lack of self-worth, and not anything she's done. She's not flawless of course, and I'm probably being a tad impatient, but none of that has earned the onstrusive thoughts that come.

I am pretty sure I am in love with her, and I have no actual doubt she feels the same. My BPD likes to tell me otherwise, but I'm not letting it sabotage the best thing in my life.

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It's really a curious thing. To be honest. The change in perspective, leaving the group, it's done a lot for me. I don't think it's just her. Yes, she triggered me to break out of my spiral, allowed me to feel what I'd been repressing, but the rest is on me.

I am getting closer to local friends, still keeping in contact with people who care, and that's what matters. It feels so good to not be in that place anymore. I feel awake and alive. I've been going on hikes weekly, probably gonna start working out again with them. I'm happy. So happy, for the first time.

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It still feels surreal, having a girlfriend. It's me than that though. Like even though her and I had an immediate connection, or we are scarily similar or that we balance each other well, but the fact she makes me feel so loved and desired. It feels unreal. And I haven't been this happy in so long. And I feel like I deserve it.

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It feels so weird, letting these people go, embracing the people I should have been. But I'm actually happy. For the first time, despite everything

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I'm not going to let the thoughts win.

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There it is. I've been waiting on the crash. This is a bad spiral even for me, the level of delusional paranoia I have right now is killing me. The ideation is bad. I've imagined at least four different ways.

My grandfather's dementia is getting bad. It's killing me. Had to take his keys away because he wasn't home when I arrived at midnight. Found him in his car asleep at my work. He doesn't know he's in Texas.. i know I'm just being like this because of my disorder.

I know none of my thoughts right now are valid but that doesn't make them go away. Fuck I'm in hell, this is so hard right now. I'm starting to feel everything.

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Down we tumble through the dark

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If I can't fight through this, I don't deserve it

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Brain be braining

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A lot of things are still awful, but I finally got a win. I met an amazing person. Matches me completely. I never understood the "she's the one" thing until now. It's still brand new, but the feeling is mutual. Life may have finally given me something. And I'm not letting go

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It's the kind of pain that takes your breath away. A pressure in your chest that makes it hard to breathe. It's more and more and more. These last two months have been so hard. I don't legitimately know how I've survived, but things aren't going to get easier. Not for awhile.

Maybe the one glimmer in my life will shine, but I'm not holding out for it. Nothing has worked out in over a year and I'm done. I'm just. Fucking. Done.