floorbeastie

[floorbeastie]

average person has 5 statements factoid actually just statistical error. average person has 1 statement max. Statements Sam, who has a horror story for every single phase of his life, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

[floorbeastie]

"people are allowed to be grossed out"

ok. keep it to yourself. it's the polite thing to do. if i'm not enjoying food someone made, that i get to eat for free, i'm not gonna shit all over their cooking and personal tastes

[floorbeastie]

Nothing more embarrassing than accidentally using a big word wrong because now I'm simultaneously both stupid and pretentious, the worst combination of all time

[floorbeastie]

everyone was joking about trump dying today and I think that's really horrible and cruel. PLEASE do not joke about trump dying unless it's true and confirmed!!! I got really excited and then when I found out he was still alive i was really disappointed!! like that's so mean to do to people

[floorbeastie]

Sir, Jonah Magnus has successfully manipulated another Bouchard

[floorbeastie]

tim: I feel like I'm being watched

elias: ehehehe I have nooo idea what you mean!! that's so weird who could possibly be watching you?? eye would never 🤭

jonathan sims, though the walls of his office: SUPPLEMENTAL: tim had 12 eggs for breakfast. that's too many eggs. I don't think he's human.

elias: ...

tim: ...

elias: OH you meant-- yeah jonathan's definitely stalking you. you should probably confront him about that.

[floorbeastie]

Blessed with artistic skills and what do I use them for?

[floorbeastie]

Animated another scene! Also from chapter 4 of deltarune...

youtube link

[floorbeastie]

Who told him about them

[floorbeastie]

really well-adjusted groups of teens over here❤️

[floorbeastie]

kris's gallery

[floorbeastie]

ok but why is Martin convinced that everybody tryna steal his girl.

Like buddy. Your girl is an evil eldritch fear entity in the form of a 5 foot negative three skinny depressed snooty rat man with no ass and undiagnosed autism who hasn’t showered in a month, is probably a closeted theatre kid, and is a total bitch to everyone he knows including you. I promise you you’re not in danger.

[floorbeastie]

[girl who would like to take a break from being a person voice] yeah no I'm just a little tired today

[floorbeastie]

[floorbeastie]

Yk… the Magnus archives is mid. I’m gonna go on a rant below the cut to not clog up peoples feeds but like. It’s not all that.

TL;DR: It’s badly written imo.

Hello, John.

Apologies for the deception,

but I wanted to make sure you started reading, so I thought it best not to announce myself.

I'm assuming you're alone; you always did prefer to read your statements in private.

[floorbeastie]

rip magnus archives crew but I'm built different. if my boss was literally all-knowing and couldn't fire me, I'd be in his office all day asking him questions about everything. I wouldn't use google anymore. I'd be like "what's the rarest kind of tree frog" and he'd be like "shut up please shut up" but he'd tell me the answer every time.

and then I'd go home and immediately call him and be like "hey elias I forgot what time I put the burekas in the oven, how much longer should I leave them in"

and he'd be like "I hate you so much. you put them in 12:42. they should come out at 1:12"

[floorbeastie]

They are done Beholding, now they are just being held <3

Bonus art under the cut:

Nils Holgersson my beloved

(Base credit to _sexy_pan on Twitter for the second one)