fluffi-dragon
fluffi-dragon
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•it/he/they•••this is my sfw tickle blog I probably will post art maybe -w-
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fluffi-dragon · 10 months ago
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Over My Dead Body
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Got writer's block on the fic I mentioned with X23 so I wrote this to keep my creative juices flowing. 😁 Hope you guys don't mind. lol I swear this was just going to be a little drabble, buuuuuuut I got carried away. It was just like, I have an idea! Oooh I have another idea! And then it just spiraled. 🤣 I suck at writing short fics. lol
Probably not my best work, but just a little silliness between these two guys. Another fic where Wade discovers Logan is ticklish and goes all out on him. I very much enjoy tickle origin fics. 🥰
Again some somewhat movie spoilers, but if you haven't seen the biggest movie in the world by now then that's your fault. lol Then of course the typical foul language and Deadpool's dirty mouth.
"Deadpool and Wolverine"-verse
M/M Tickle Fic
Word Count: 5,139
"Fucking give me that remote, Wilson!" Logan let out a teeth-bared snarl while chasing Wade comically around and around the couch like in a Scooby Doo cartoon.
"But baby cakes, I want to watch 'Touched By An Angel'! Wade snickered, managing to stay just one step ahead.
"Fuck that shit! This is the final round for the Flames in the Stanley Cup, and I am NOT missing it!" He finally caught up to Wade and took him down with a flying tackle of heavy adamantium as they both crashed to the floor and the tv remote went sailing out of reach.
Logan quickly scrambled to his feet as he made a break for it, but Wade successfully grabbed his leg to trip him as he hit the floor again with the merc now up and giggling as he ran to claim the prize.
"Yessss! Home run! And the crowd goes wild!" Wade mimicked the sounds of a cheering stadium while triumphantly holding the remote over his head. However, this was instantaneously followed by a loud growl from Logan as he charged his roommate like a bull and slammed into him harder than a Mack truck.
Wade didn't have time to yelp as his body went flying across the room though the remote had been knocked from his grasp and dropped to the ground, exploding the case open as the batteries all popped out. Logan reached down to pick it all up, shaking his head in annoyance as he walked back over towards the couch and tried to jam the batteries back in properly.
"Motherfucking idiot. Just sit your stupid ass down and take the L. I'm putting on the hockey game and that's that."
But Wade wasn't through yet. He was having too much fun with this! He was always trying to get Logan to roughhouse and play with him, but with the X-man being such a stiff it was hard to get him to let loose. Alcohol usually played a big factor in getting Logan to loosen his inhibitions and engage, but at the current moment he was sober as a judge. 
Pissing him off was the next best thing, and Wade loved a good chase and the physical contact, even if it was of the more painful variety. They had a rule about not spilling any blood inside the apartment, but he knew Logan could be pushed too far sometimes and forget about that so Wade would usually back off before he reached that point.
Though at this present time he had only antagonized him a little bit so he knew Logan would be able to tolerate him just a smidge more.
Logan's hypersensitive ears easily picked up the sound of the energetic man coming at him again as he turned around just as Wade plowed all of his weight into him to tackle him onto the couch. Wade quickly took the position to straddle the man's thighs and started making grabs for the remote as growling curses were hurled at him.
"Goddammit! You juvenile fucking moron! Just back off! The only way you're getting this over my dead body!"
"Bet," Deadpool nodded and kept up in his efforts.
As they played slap-hands fighting to get a hold of the controller it slipped from their grip, hitting Logan in the face on its way down before sliding inside his collar down into his button-up overshirt.
"Nice going, captain loser. Don't worry, I'll get it!" Wade immediately went after it as he haphazardly began squeezing and poking around Logan's midsection as he tried to find the location of the remote hidden beneath the fabric.
As irritated as he was Logan now found that he had a new problem as his body started involuntarily reacting to the way Wade was grabbing at him. It was making his skin crawl. Shivers running up his spine as he began to writhe underneath the other man, trying to avoid the touches.
"Stop squirming, would you? You're making this way harder than it has to be. And I can't find the remote either," Wade teased, always managing to slip in inappropriate innuendos, but Logan was too occupied to make a sarcastic retort as he frantically tried to grab and get control of Wade's busy hands.
"Q-Quit it, shithead!" Logan gritted through his teeth as Wade just clucked his tongue and shook his head.
"Oh c'mon! Stop fighting it and just give it up!" Wade's words held a double meaning in this situation as his hands moved lower, giving the grump a particularly firm squeeze around his hips as Logan couldn't hold it in anymore. 
His back arched off the couch accompanied by a loud snort; his nose scrunched as a soft string of giggles tumbled their way out. 
Upon hearing that Wade immediately stopped what he was doing; practically frozen in shock as he stared down at the bigger male below him. After a few long, tense moments a slow grin of realization started to spread over his face and Logan was suddenly overcome with a feeling of immense dread at what was about to transpire.
"Did...Did you just giggle?"
"....No," was all Logan could say lamely; his uneasy mind not allowing him to come up with anything else as Wade only smiled more.
"Now here's the plot twist that I never would have expected. You wanna tell me what that was all about? Forgive me if I'm finding it difficult to believe that a hardened tough guy like you could possibly be, dare I say it.....ticklish."
Logan's eyes betrayed him as they widened in pure terror; his brain frantically trying to figure out a solution to get him out of this mess, but his silence told more than enough.
"Ohohoho, you are, aren't you? Well this just made things a lot more sexy...I mean, interesting," Wade stroked his own chin, pondering the situation while Logan finally regained his wit and was now on the rebound to try to deny it.
"What? Are you kidding? Tch! I am not ticklish. Where the fuck do you come up with such stupid ideas?" He made his best attempt to sound convincing, but Wade could easily see right through his bullshit.
"I gotta tell you that all sounds exactly like something a ticklish person would say. A pitiful performance like that isn't going to win you any Oscars," Wade smirked before his eyes then drifted back down to Logan's torso, "Oh dear. It looks like the remote has fallen inside your shirt. Whatever shall we do?"
Wade was gently tugging at the front of his shirt as Logan narrowed his eyes.
"Just get offa me and I'll get it myself. Quit looking for excuses to grope me, ya fucking pervert," Logan growled deeply with his characteristic hard-as-nails Wolverine glare, trying to be as off-putting as possible to hopefully get Wade to lose the notion.
"But it's so confusing when your mouth says 'no', but your eyes say 'yes'," Wade grinned, giving a light tickle to Logan's sides that made him flinch, "By the way, what do you want your safe word to be?"
"Touch me and I will cut your useless motherfucking head off, Wilson."
Wade laughed chaotically and shook his head.
"Now that's kind of a mouthful to say. You should pick something easier like 'umbrella' or 'avocado' or 'supercalifragilisticexpialidocious'-"
Logan realized he was running out of time for stalling and was now struggling to push Wade off of him before he could actually carry out this heinous act, but the merc simply shoved his arms aside and launched his attack, tickling wildly along his ribcage.
"Oh I get it! You don't want a safe word! Very kinky! I like your style! Well you did say the only way I was getting the remote was over your dead body. Who knew it was going to be death by tickling?"
Logan made a strained grunting noise as he steeled himself and began writhing about, still fighting to force Wade off despite the fingers running along his ribs. He in no way wanted to give Wade the satisfaction of making him laugh and would hold it in for as long as he could.
"Looks like we've got a tough guy, ladies and gentlemen," Wade grinned, momentarily looking out at the camera then turning back to his victim, "You know in all the fanfics I've read it's always the toughest guys that are the most ticklish of all. Look at you doing everything in your power not to laugh. How cute. Too bad you're not going to be able to keep that up. I pretty much wrote the book on 'lerring."
Wolverine had no idea what that meant but could hardly fathom the idea that he was going to have to listen to Wade's annoying jabbering and teases without being able to give him a piece of his mind. Because if he even dared to open his mouth it was game over and he was going to fucking lose it.
"So are you like one of those guys who are only ticklish around here...," Wade squeezed and massaged into his sides as an involuntary grin stretched across Logan's face while keeping his jaw clenched, "Or are you one of those head-to-toe ticklish kinda guys? I'm betting the latter."
While still keeping one hand digging into his side Deadpool now reached up to teasingly trace his fingers with a feather-light touch over Logan's ear and down his neck as the man wrenched his head away and scrunched up his shoulder to try to cover up that side of his head.
"Ooooh so sensitive. Am I going to have some fun with you. All we're missing is the sweet sound of your laughter. C'moooooooon just let it out already. You're not embarrassed of your laugh, are you? I'm sure it's wonderful. Don't be shy now, it's just the two of us here."
Every word that came out of Wade's mouth was slowly eating away at Logan's resolve along with his mental capacity to resist the laughter building up inside of him. Giving into Wade's demands was not high on his list of favorable activities, but he knew it was about to happen whether he wanted it to or not.
"You are one hard nut to crack, I'll give you that. But that's okay, it's just going to make breaking you even sweeter. Heheh, look how red your face is. You look like you're about to explode. I just need to find the right spot to poke that bubble and free you of your burden. Hmmm, I think I know where....," Wade smirked big time as he changed tactics to thrust his hands underneath Logan's arms and furiously tickle into his armpits.
The battle was finally over. Logan had fought for as long as he possibly could, but he just couldn't take it anymore. With Wade having honed in on one of his most sensitive areas he felt his lips make one last valiant effort to stay sealed as they trembled right before releasing his loud, pent-up outburst.
"HAHAHaahaha! AhahahahaStop! Stahahahap ihihhit!" Logan hollered as he managed to shove Wade's hands out of his pits, though they immediately latched onto his waist and dug right in. Wade was beyond pleased with this turn of events.
"Ahhhh there it is. And it's just as adorable as I imagined. See? Nothing to be embarrassed about," Wade's grin encompassed his whole face as he didn't let up and kept kneading his thumbs right above Logan's hips.
"I wahahahasn't embahahaharrassed, ya dehehehense fuhuhuhucking prihihihiiick!  Gahahahahaa! Just didhihihidn't wahahahaha-wahant to gihihihive you the sss-satisfahahahaction!" Logan struggled to speak clearly through his laughter as he twisted and squirmed, trying to wriggle out from under the other man.
"Well mission failed, my little stud muffin. I can't believe you've been hiding your ticklishness from me all this time. Think of all the fun we're going to have together now!" Wade exclaimed with pure glee as he moved back up to the ribs now that he was receiving the reactions he wanted, making Logan cackle uncontrollably.
"Fuhuhuhuhuuuuck!! Okaahahahay! You gohohohohot meheheee! I'm tihihihicklish! Now fuhuhuhuhuhuck ohhohohoff!" Logan's hysterical proclamation was accompanied by a series of hard snorts, making Wade's face light up even more.
"You're a snorter?! Oh that's just so precious! How can you expect me to fuck off after hearing that?! Nononono, I think I will keep fucking on, thank you very much! Besides if I stop now then this will be this shortest tickle fic ever written!" He increased his speed, probing between every rib bone as he played his friend's sides like a ticklish piano.
Logan surprisingly laughed even harder, wheezing for air as he continued letting out a snort every few seconds with his burly arms pitifully clamped as tight as he could against his sides. Nothing was stopping the devilishly dexterous fingers of his hyper roommate though.
"Wihihihilsonaaahahahahah.......sssstooooohahahahahahooooop! I'll....I'll gihihihihive you ohohone lahahahast chaaa-EEEHEEHEEHeheheheheheeh!" Logan literally squealed much to his chagrin as he broke into high-pitched giggles with Wade switching spots to now claw mercilessly at his stomach and waist.
"Oh I've never heard a Wolverine squeal before. It's just the gift that keeps on giving. Definitely going to need that as my new ringtone. But hmmm, I think this could be better...," Wade mused as his fingers kept scratching over the buttons going down Logan's flannel shirt, no doubt hindering his tickling efforts if only a little.
In the next second he grabbed Logan's overshirt and pulled hard in opposite directions to pop all the buttons as the remote was finally freed and clattered to the floor. The mercenary smirked as he saw that Logan wasn't wearing anything underneath as his hairy, heavy-muscled torso was now on full display.
Logan was grateful that it had all stopped and the remote was now nowhere near him as he leaned his head back and tried to catch his breath.
"........Fuck......Okay.....You win you win. Just take the fucking thing.....and go ahead and watch your stupid ass shoHOHohOhOHOhoW! NAAAAHOHOHOHOOOOO!!"
Logan had thought it was over, but his momentary sparkle of hope vanished instantly as Wade paid the controller no mind and lunged for him again.
"Ahh yes, that's much better! Now I can really get my hands in here!" Wade smirked in delight with his fingers currently buried and wriggling into Logan's armpits while the feral man roared with deep belly laughs before fizzling into helpless wheezes.
"Ohoho you're very tickly here, aren't you? Bet you wish you would've chosen a safe word now, huh? Or not. Maybe you're enjoying this. Is that it? Don't lie to me now."
"I'm gohohohohonna fffffff-aaahahahhahahah.....fuhuhuhucking k-kihihihill yooooou!" Logan wheezed out as he weakly smacked at Wade's arms and haphazardly kicked his legs around.
"Awww don't be mean, peanut. I just can't get enough of the sound of your laugh. That's not a crime, is it?"
Logan couldn't remember having ever been tickled like this. It had been so long since he'd been this close to anybody, and his memory of such things was pretty fuzzy of anything that happened before his regrettable incident. After those events he'd become even more withdrawn and had fallen deep into depression from the unbearable guilt he felt, confident that he never deserved to be happy again.
And then this annoying little fucker appeared at that bar one day and dragged him on the wildest, most fucked up adventure he could ever recall being on. If at the beginning of all that someone had told him that Wade and he were going to become great friends then he would have laughed right in their face.
But it did happen, and Logan was taken-aback to finally be around someone again who actually cared about his well-being. Someone who wanted the best for him and to make sure that he knew that he mattered. Someone who wanted nothing more than for him to be happy.
And Deadpool was always trying to make him laugh. The look of genuine happiness on Wade's face was unmatched whenever one of his jokes managed to land and make Logan chuckle. The X-man seemed to smile a lot more these days, but laughing was still a rare occurrence for him, which is why Logan was so defensive against the tickling that was currently causing him to do so.
But could he say with complete honesty that he truly hated all this? The answer irked him a little bit because it was no, he didn't hate it, but he was conflicted because he still didn't think he should be allowed to feel pure joy again. 
He felt that guilt come up again when he admitted to himself that laughing like this actually felt good. He didn't deserve to feel good. Ever. But obviously Wade had a difference of opinion on that. Wanting him to smile. Wanting him to laugh. Wanting him to let go of his guilt and be happy in this universe that undoubtedly wouldn't be here without him.
"Don't think I forgot about this little sweet spot!"
Wade brought him out of these thoughts rather quickly once he began scribbling all ten fingers over his taut, bare stomach as the Wolverine tossed his head back in howling laughter with his eyes squeezed shut and tears forming in the corners of them.
"Coochie coochie coo! Awwww wittle Wolvie is so ticklish! Yes, he is! Yes, he is!" The merc cooed playfully, knowing all these teases were key to breaking down Logan's mental barriers. And it was working as Logan finally stopped feeling sorry for himself and just gave into it all.
"W-Waaade nooooo! Aahahahahahaah! Cuhuhuhut it ohohhohout! Pleeheheheheeease!"
The merc cocked his head in amusement, having never heard Logan even come close to begging for anything before.
"Oooooh this really is a killer spot, isn't it? Is this rock-hard belly of yours the most ticklish of all? How ironic," Wade mused while absentmindedly squirming a finger down into his navel, making Logan buck strongly and shriek with unrestrained giggles.
"Shihihihiiiiit! Aaaheehehehehehee! Noohohohooot in thehehehere! Fohohor fuhuhuhucks saahaahaakeheehehehehehahahah-st-stoohahahahop tihihihickling! You're kihihhihillin' meheeheehee!"
Wade's stomach did a little somersault at how vulnerable Logan was now being with him. It was all he ever wanted was to see his friend let go of all his anger and self-loathing of the past and surrender himself to the present day. 
Logan was laughing freely now. He wasn't grinding his teeth and trying to hold anything in anymore and he even stopped really fighting to get Wade off of him.  His face and chest were flushed, tears running down his cheeks as he just laid there in a squirming heap with his wide-open mouth releasing endless peals of laughter and pleas for mercy.
In all honesty Wade didn't want to stop just so he could keep Logan in this state for as long as possible where he was freed from the prison of his own mind, though he knew that he'd have to let him go eventually. Still not quite this second.
"Stop? But I couldn't possibly! Look how happy it's making you! I'd be an asshole to rob you of that! Lucky for you I'm such a good friend, huh?! Tickletickletickletickle! Laugh it up, buddy!" He kept ruthlessly tickling his heaving belly while his other hand slid up to creep back into his armpit, rendering Logan into a powerless wheezing wreck.
"Nohohohooot fahahahaaair! Baahahhhahahaha! Wahahade pleeeease! I cahahahaa-cahahaan't tahahake anymohohohore! Uhuhuhuhuncle!"
Between Wade's unrelenting yapping and Logan's loud fits of laughter they both failed to hear the sound of the front doorknob rattling right before it opened and in walked Dopinder with several plastic bags of take-out in his hands.
"Hello? Your UberEats order is here, Mr. Logan. I've got your hot wings and your pizza rolls and your-AAAH!!" Dopinder let out a scream as he rounded the corner to find Wade straddling and feeling up a howling, red-faced and bare-chested Wolverine. 
Upon hearing the terrified cry Wade immediately paused what he was doing as he looked back over his shoulder like a kid caught with his hand in the cookie jar.
"Uhh heeeey Dopinder. Ummm.....This isn't what it looks like.....," he had a guilty look on his face, but quickly revealed his facade as he broke into a devious grin, "Just fucking with you! It's totally what it looks like!"
"And-And what exactly does it look like?" The younger man dared to ask despite his better judgement.
"Well you see Dopinder when two men start living together they begin to develop these feelings; feelings that cause them to get these strong urges that they just can't ignore and-," Wade's tirade of nonsense was cut off as Logan took the opportunity to give him a hard shove and flip him over the back of the couch between pants for air
"Fucking idiot. Don't...freak out, kid. The asshole....was just ticklin' me...is all," Logan breathlessly grunted while moving to take a normal seated position on the couch as Wade then popped his head up from the back.
"That's what he wants to call it. Wanna get in on this action, Dopinder?"
"Oh uhh hehe, n-no thank you. I actually have some more deliveries to get finished. Ermm, next time perhaps," he stuttered nervously as he gingerly placed the food down onto the coffee table in front of them and began to make his exit from the apartment.
"Don't think I'm not holding you to that," Wade teased, making his former cab driver blush and dart out through the door as Wade chuckled and nudged Logan in the shoulder, "Hehehe, did you see how flustered he got? I'll bet he's even more ticklish than you are."
"Leave the kid alone, Wilson. You'd probably kill him. He doesn't have a healing factor like I do," Logan snorted, bunching up his shoulders as Wade lightly ran a finger across the back of his neck.
"Ohh I can be gentle if I want. But I'm pretty sure you're the kind of guy who likes it rough," Wade teased as he moved around to the front of the couch to sit next to the other man, surprised to hear Logan let out a low chuckle.
"Was that a laugh? Nice to see you finally start to appreciate my elite level of humor. Maybe I won't have to start with the daily tickle sessions after all."
Logan made a face at that and lifted his brow.
"Daily? Yeah fuck no, that ain't happening. Once in a while......fine. But I don't think I could take it every day," he mentally shivered thinking about what Wade just put him through.
"Tell you what, you start laughing a little more at my jokes and I'll consider it. But no fake laughing! Because I can tell the difference! Especially now that I know what your real laugh sounds like and let me tell you it's going to be hard for me to get enough of it," Wade experimentally grabbed his knee, giving it a firm squeeze and digging his fingers in around the kneecap as Logan instantly wheezed out a laugh and quickly wrenched the hand off of him.
"Alrihight! I get it! Promise I'll try!"
"I guess that's all I can ask of you. Of course I'm still making it my mission to find everywhere else you're ticklish, and what other really bad spots you have.....unless you just want to tell me," Wade suggested with a grin as Logan just smirked right back.
"Now where'd be the fun in that?"
"You know, you are so right, you smug little honey badger. I gotta say though I'm liking this mood you're in now."
"Well it's your fault. Ya tickled me so bad I couldn't even think straight. Seems like you pushed all the negative thoughts right outta my mind," Logan confessed as Wade began to reconsider his earlier promise.
"Is that so? Hmmm maybe those daily tickle sessions are a good idea after all...," Wade teased just to watch Logan squirm at the thought again.
"I don't think so, bub. Besides, look what ya did," he gestured to his wide-open shirt, pointing at all the areas missing buttons, "You ruined my favorite fucking shirt, dickhead."
"Hardly. You've got like twenty of the exact same one. That's all you ever wear," Wade was quick to point out as Logan just shrugged with a smile.
"So? What's your point?"
"My point is you're a walking fashion disaster. But okay, I'll try not to be so rough next time. We can do the gentle stuff if you prefer. So for research purposes can you tell me how you feel about feathers, hm?" He grinned as he saw Logan shift uneasily in his seat.
"You're gettin' a little crazy now, Wilson."
"Oh c'moooon, just imagine a nice, fluffy feather teasing that big ol' neck of yours.....circling your little tummy button....stroking the backs of your knees.....threading between all your toes....I can't imagine that your feet were spared of your adorable weakness."
"Wade...."
"Oooh! What about raspberries?! Those are fun! Bet it would drive you insane if I blew them on your belly. How about we test that out really quick?" Wade took a deep breath and started leaning towards him with his eyes locked onto his stomach.
"Alright cut it out!" Logan's hand caught him by the face and shoved him kind of hard, though couldn't stop himself from chuckling as he shook his head, "Fuckin' hell, you've seriously got a career in how to mentally torture a guy."
"At your service," Wade tipped an invisible hat as he then surveyed all the bags of food on the table in front of them, "So what did you order all of this for?"
"I told ya I was gonna watch the hockey game. Can't watch it without some proper snacks now," he reached into one of the bags and pulled out a tall can of beer as he popped the pull ring and took a long drink out of it while the other man began removing the take-out boxes.
"Chimichangas? Since when do you eat chimichangas?" Wade looked over at him questionably upon opening one of the containers as Logan gave him a half-smile.
"I got those for you, dumbass. Thought maybe you'd wanna hang out and watch the game with me." 
Wade was left momentarily speechless, truly touched by Logan's unexpected gesture.
"Well.....yeah of course. I'd love to. But how come you didn't ask me earlier?"
"Didn't get a chance to because you started bein' an idiot and going off about some other stupid show....'Touched By An Asshole' or something. What kinda pervy ass show is that anywaahaahaays?" Logan giggled, rubbing at his ribs where Wade had now just indignantly poked him.
"It's 'Touched By An Angel', you disrespectful twat. And it's a national treasure. But besides the fact that I've seen every episode, I didn't really want to watch it. I was just trying to get a rise out of you. You seemed tense," Wade admitted as Logan only shrugged and sipped from his beer can.
"When am I not?"
"Umm...Right now. Honestly I haven't you seen this relaxed in.....ever. Even when you're drunk sometimes you're still pretty moody," Wade pointed out as Logan took it in and knew he was right. He'd literally been forced into laughing off all of the burdens that he had carried for many years. His mind currently free from all the adverse feelings and troubles that he'd been endlessly plagued. 
The effects were likely not permanent but at least for the time being he felt good. Having to suffer through a vicious tickle attack to achieve that was more than worth it he decided.
"Hmph. Yeah. I guess you're right," a smile broke across Logan's face as he punched Wade in the shoulder, "Thanks asshole."
"Any time. And if you ever change your mind about the daily ticklings then I'm your guy," Wade was glowing from the actual genuine appreciation he'd just received from the normally cantankerous Wolverine.
"Heh. We'll see," Logan smirked as he bent over to pick up the remote off of the floor and turned on the television ahead of them, switching channels until he found the right one, "So do ya even like hockey?"
Wade nodded enthusiastically.
"Love it so much that I've never watched a game in my entire life," he said matter-of-factly before clapping his hands in excitement when he saw Dogpool trot into the room, patting the spot on the couch next to him as she jumped up.
Logan sighed as he handed his roommate a beer, realizing that the next few hours were going to be filled with Wade obnoxiously asking questions about every little thing that happened in the game. Though he couldn't help but smile as he watched the man-child start happily eating the chimichangas while simultaneously feeding little bits of them to his unusual looking dog.
Truth be told they all were an unusual bunch. Not just the three of them, but Blind Al, Peter, and Dopinder, to name a few. All these people that Wade had brought into his life and openly shared with him. Not to mention without Wade's intervention he never would have met Laura; someone he found he made a fast connection with and was now someone he cared deeply about.
Really Wade had rescued him that day. Rescued him from himself and gave him another reason to keep on living for. He felt his heart warm as he looked over at one of the side tables where Wade kept a framed photo of all of their friends; only now it was a new picture that included Logan, Laura and Mary Puppins in it.
Logan's smile grew as he reached over to pat the dog on the head before Wade made a whimpering noise and leaned his own head towards him to receive the same affection. He chuckled and obliged for a few moments before getting a wicked grin on his face as he snatched the hair piece off of Wade's head, prompting a momentary yelp of pain from the scarred man.
As the merc rubbed at his head while glaring over at him Logan found it impossible not to start laughing while jokingly dangling the toupee up in his hand. Wade then promptly broke into a smirk that told him he was dead, though even with that warning Logan made no attempt to escape.
Wade easily knocked him onto his back again to mercilessly tickle his sides while at the same time making the Wolverine shriek by blowing those promised raspberries into his stomach. And they tickled just as badly as Wade had said.
Yes, they were an unusual bunch, but they were his whole world now. And Logan was never going to let them down. Over his dead body.
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fluffi-dragon · 11 months ago
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Little Sass Factory
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Word Count: 1.8K
Warnings: canon typical language, Logan being ruthless and Wade being a teasy asshole
A/N: LETS GOOO DEADPOOL AND WOLVIE FIC‼️‼️ I’ve been wanting to write for these guys ever since I saw the movie y’all have no idea I am so obsessed with them right now 😞 AND A PLUS BEING THIS DOESNT NECESSARILY SPOIL THE MOVIE SOOOO YALL CAN READ IT 🙌🏻🙌🏻
I really hope y’all like this bc I cannot stop thinking about them and yapping about them to my buddies 😭🙏🏻 Like as much as I’d love to wreck these two, I cannot stop thinking about them as a ler duo so have this :]
OKAY HAVE FUN READING YALL 🫂❤️
Tag List: @prairleedog (THANKS FOR THE TITLE INSPO POOKALOOKS 🙏🏻❤️) @kittenwhiskers @cherry-bomb-blush
“Y’know what? I’m actually real excited for this! Moony has been wanting to write a thing with us for a while now! Good on her for pushing through the writers block, that shit sucks ass.”
“…What the hell are you talking about?! We’re looking for the kid, remember!?”
And that they were. They’d been scouring the apartment for like… six minutes now trying to find you. But somehow, you’d been able to consistently switch hiding spots without them noticing.
How? They had no clue. The pair wouldn’t have been surprised discovering you were also some kind of mutant but with advanced sneakiness, if that was even a thing.
Wade was actually having a bit of fun with this, whereas Logan… he was getting pretty pissed. More so than usual.
“Kid, I swear to god, if you don’t show yourself in ten goddamn seconds, I WILL start tearing this fucking place down!”
Logan crouched, his claws instantly coming out, making Wade panic.
“Woaaah, woah, woah, woah! Easy, Peanut, we’re trying to find ‘em! Not kill them, which may sound a little rich coming from me-“
“I’m pretty sure I’m allowed to be angry. The kid decided to pull that shit on us and then split. And now we can’t find ‘em.” The older man growled, his claws retracting back into his hands.
“And this is the moment we start working together!” Wade announced, an arm slung around Logan’s shoulder that most likely would’ve been sliced if he hadn’t allowed the latter to shrug it off in annoyance.
However, Logan swiftly turned at the sound of a noise nearby, his eyebrow raising as he went to check it out, leaving Wade to keep rambling about nonsense he didn’t understand.
“God, where’s Peter Parker when you need him?? Actually, I don’t think I’d mind a lil bit of Miguel O’hara…” Wade let out a long whistle.
“…Ah wait, he doesn’t have that Spidey-Tingle , fUCK-!”
The merc suddenly yelped as he was grabbed by his collar, being yanked towards where Logan was moving.
Meanwhile, you were curled up, both hands over your mouth as you tried to shut yourself up, anxious titters threatening to give yourself away.
You mentally berated that stupid floorboard that just had to creak at the slightest bit of goddamn pressure.
“Ohhh, Y/NNNNN! Come on out now, we’re not gonna hurt ya!”
The sound of the merc’s goofy teasing made you snicker even more, but when you heard how close Logan’s voice was to the closet, you froze.
“Why the hell do you have to talk like that?”
“Whaaat? It turns up the fun knob a little bit! And I know they can hear meeeee!” Wade crooned in that same sing-song tone, followed by an unamused huff from Logan.
“We’re gonna getcha, we’re gonna getchaaaa!”
God, could they just get out the room?? You had to throw them off again and fast. During your panicked inner monologue, you were soon met with… silence.
You relaxed, knowing you must’ve had an opportunity.
…At least you did until you realised something. When the hell is it ever quiet when those two are together?
Then, you heard a hushed voice coming from outside the closet door.
“Ladies and gents, this is the moment you’ve waited for…”
…Oh, fuck.
Without warning, the closet doors were swung open by Wade, and the merc jokingly vocalised (very off-key too) while throwing his arms up with a flourish.
“WOOOAAAAAH!”
As you yelped in fear and dashed out the closet, Wade laughed and made a glance towards… well, air.
“If ya know, ya know!”
You quickly slipped past Wade, also laughing as you ran out the door to the room you’d been hiding in.
“Yohou’ll never take me al- ACK-!”
You yelped again as two strong arms wrapped around your torso, hoisting you up and off the floor.
…Shit.
“And just where do you think you’re goin, bub?”
“Wait, wahahait! Logan, hohold on-“
“No no no no no, I’m not waiting for anything.” Logan interrupted, carrying you back into the bedroom. “Not after you pulled that shit.”
“Oh, whahat? A little bit of water?”
“I wouldn’t say the rubber band on the sink trick counts as a little bit of water, Y/N.” Wade snickered, crossing his arms and smiling proudly at the fact you’d been caught.
“Come ohon, it wasn’t that bahAD-!” You yelped again as you were tossed onto the bed, still giggling. “Whahat’s the matter? Couldn’t shake the water off, kitty cat?”
The older hero scowled threateningly at you, ignoring Wade who sniggered at the joking insult.
“What?”
“You heheard me!”
Just as Logan was about to full on lunge towards you, Wade grabbed him.
“Hey, hey! Easy now, boy.” The merc spoke like he was talking to a feral dog, making Logan glare at him and growl.
“God, what now?”
“We gotta approach slowly! It builds up anticipation…” As Wade spoke, he began slowly approaching, carefully clambering onto the bed. “And proves to this little prankster how royally fucked they are!”
And it was working. Your giggles soon turned nervous, and you curled up, attempting to shy away from Wade (but not actually putting a lot of effort into getting away, much to Logan’s surprise and Wade’s amusement).
“And theeeen I’m juuust gonnaaaaaa…”
Suddenly, the merc’s arms swiftly looped under your own, lifting and leaving your, well, everything pretty much exposed and unable to be protected.
“Go on, boy! Gettem! Gettem, boy!”
Logan’s fury was way too fuelled by Wade’s stupid comments to even allow you to get a word in edgeways, instantly lunging forwards before digging and vibrating his claw-shaped hands right into your ribs.
“OhoH SHIHIHIT-! L-Logan, gehet OHOHOFF-!” A squeal left your mouth as you burst into frantic giggles and tried to kick, only for the older man to firmly shove right back at your legs, rendering you unable to fight back.
“God, will you just- quit the kicking?” Logan growled, a surprising air of playfulness behind it as he shot his hands right down to your thighs, firmly kneading there.
Despite already squealing your ass off, you couldn’t help but make a quip.
“Mahahaking biscuits reheally isn’t gonna hehehelp you beat the kitty allegahations, buhud-!”
Another low grumble filled the room, before Logan turned his head to Wade.
“Shut the kid up.”
“Roger that!”
Wade did a dumb salute before unhooking his arms from under yours to wiggle his fingers right into your armpits.
“Getchagetchagetcha!”
“AAAAHHHHHAHA DAMMIHIHIT-!” You practically shrieked, your giggles instantly shifting into full blown laughter as you pinned your elbows to your ribs, trying to squirm away but failing thanks to that iron grip Logan had on your legs.
“Ooh! I think I got a killer spot here, Logan!”
“Hmph, that’s nothin. Watch this.”
Logan earned another screech by mercilessly drilling his thumbs into your hips, making you buck instinctively and cackle uncontrollably.
“Nuh-uh! Armpits are the killer!” Wade protested, the merc speeding up his tickles on your underarms.
“Fat chance! They’re like a banshee when you get ‘em here!”
You wanted to protest, but all you could focus on were those hands attacking your weak spots.
Eventually, you felt them thankfully let up.
…For now, anyway.
“Now, Y/N. There is a way we can squash this beef, y’know.”
Logan sighed at Wade’s words, never understanding this ridiculous slang he dropped into conversation like it was nothing.
“Maybe a simple phrase such as… ‘I’m sorry?’”
“I can do one better.” Logan interrupted. “How about ‘I’m sorry I was a jabbering little sass factory who had the audacity to pull a dumb fuckin prank on people who didn’t do jack?’”
While catching your breath, you sealed what was basically your death wish.
“Oh, yeheah, Captain Caveman? Wheheres your helicopter cluhub, you gonna hit mehe with it?”
Logan fell silent again… while Wade couldn’t help but let out a wheeze at the quip.
“Ohoh, my god! Baby’s first character comparison joke, I’ve taught you so well..!” Wade sniffed dramatically, wiping a fake tear of proudness from the corner of his eye.
However, he froze once he heard you mutter something else.
“Thahat’s right, Mr Clehean-“
A strong gasp of offence left the merc as he placed a hand on his chest, while Logan gave him a smug look at not being the only one who was insulted.
“I beg your finest fucking pardon?! You think that’s any way to talk to Marvel Jesus and his very hairy disciple here!?”
Logan gave Wade another unamused glare.
“Y’know what?”
Wade then swiftly grabbed you again.
“Give ‘em the whiskers, Peanut!”
“They’re not whiskers, they’re muttonchops, you dumb fuck.”
“Same thing! Or shall I pull the move and do a much better job as always?”
The older man snarled, lowering his head down.
“I’ll show you who does it better, asshole…”
“Okay, wait, wahait-! W-What mohove is thiHIHIS-?!”
You cut yourself off with yet another shriek as Logan suddenly blew a giant raspberry right against your stomach, the added sensations that his facial hair provided making you near silent laughter.
It was clear that Logan was basically taking out all his pent up annoyance at Wade on you, and good god it tickled super bad.
And Wade? He was being no help either, as usual.
“Awww, wook at the giggwy wittle baby! Are the Badger Berries making their tummy all tickly? And are they having the time of their life? Yes, they are! Yes, they aaare!”
…Asshole. (Even if he was right.)
You did pride yourself on lasting about five raspberries (Wade could only ever really handle two), but you eventually had to tap your hand against one of Wade’s arms that were still hooked under yours.
“Okahay, Logan. Give em a rest.”
Despite his annoyed hesitance, Logan leant back up, allowing you to get your breath back in shaky pants.
“Geheez… you twoho are juhuhust..!”
“We’re waiting, kid.”
The older man interrupted, giving you a playful but threatening look.
“Fihine… I-I’m sohorry..!” You sighed, your face red as anything as you blinked away little tears that had pricked in the corners of your eyes.
“There we go! That wasn’t so hard now, was it?” Wade teased, resting his chin on your shoulder, in which you just rolled your eyes.
“Anyway, we better get ready for round two, huh?”
…Uh oh.
“WHAT?! B-Buhut I apologised!”
Wade did a pretend ‘apologetic asshole’ wince.
“Yeah… but this attack was more only to get you to apologise. This one is to actually teach you a lesson!”
“But thahat’s bullshit-!”
“Well, it’s a good thing we don’t give a fuck.”
Logan shared a look of pure mischief with Wade.
“Let’s gettem.”
And just like that, you were screaming and laughing the apartment down once more, as Logan nuzzled his furry face right into your belly again, pretending to eat it and growling playfully while Wade wrapped his arms around you and blew a raspberry right into the crook of your neck.
Yeah… you were gonna be here for a while.
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fluffi-dragon · 11 months ago
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How To Pet a Wolverine
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I finally got to see 'Deadpool and Wolverine' on Sunday and have been inspired to write a little tickle fic. :) Hope you guys enjoy!
Warning for movie spoilers and lots of foul language and general Deadpool-isms. But if you've seen the movie too then this is exactly what you should expect from the two of them. XD
M/M Tickle Fic
Word Count: 2,343
Deadpool groaned as he was slammed headfirst into the dashboard of the Odyssey again, taking a moment to upright himself as he turned back around to make eye contact with one pissed off Wolverine.
They had been nonstop fighting for over twenty minutes now and with the both of them being able to heal so quickly it could go on indefinitely. But there was no time for this! With every minute that ticked by that was one less minute that Wade had at the chance to save his universe.
Wade wasn't the type of guy to ever give up, but he knew there was absolutely zero chance that Logan was going to. The older man even seemed to be enjoying taking all of his pent-up anger out through his endless stabbing and slicing at Wade's body.
"Okay! Time out!" Wade screeched with his hands up in a 'T' shape just as Logan launched himself from the back and landed on top of him with his claws at the ready, though managing to restrain himself from thrusting them into Wade's head for the moment.
Wade spoke slowly with his hands still up as a sign of surrender.
"Now let's just take a second here......to calm down......and reassess the situation."
"You started it, bub," Logan growled in his face as the merc scoffed and tossed his head around in exasperation.
"Ohhh c'mon! Can't we just admit that we were both giant assholes?!"
Logan only retained his glower while the tips of his claws pressed into the side of Wade's head.
"Uggh fine! I'll be the grown up here, geez. Okay I'm sorry I punched you in the face first. And I'm sorry I lied about being able to get your world back. But you know there is still a chance that it is possible. Right? We don't know for sure yet that my claim was total bullshit. But I promise that from here on out there will be no more lies from me .....Okay? We good?"
The anger in the feral man's eyes began to subside along with the tension in his muscles diminishing as his breathing grew less harsh and had evened out.
"Not a lie. An educated fucking wish," Logan smirked and retracted his foot-long claws back into his hand much to Wade's relief, "Ya know that's probably the most ridiculous thing I've heard in a long time."
"Sorry, but I was in a panic trying to diffuse the situation and sometimes my mind just comes up with the stupidest shit and I can't control what comes out of my mouth."
"Sometimes?" Logan raised a skeptical brow, making Wade gasp in mock offense.
"Well that's not very nice. I'm a human being, you know, with feelings and dreams.....," he paused as he eyed the man hovering over him up and down before adding, "...and a raging boner."
The Wolverine let out an annoyed sigh and shook his head.
"For fucks sake, does everything have to be a perverted joke with you?"
"Who's joking, gorgeous? Now get off of me. My pants only have so much room for expansion," he carried on while simultaneously giving Logan a poke in the stomach, eliciting a snort and a faint twitch that Wade didn't fail to notice as the man promptly backed off of him.
"Well well, what in the name of PG-rated shit have we got here?" Wade said a little giddily, tilting his head as Logan looked at him with a suspicious frown from where he had now settled into the 3rd row back seat.
"The fuck you babblin' about?" He continued to glare while Wade began slowly crawling towards him from the front of the van.
"I mean, either this is just a wet dream I'm having, or it appears the big, bad Wolverine may be a little ticklish."
Logan's face remained stone-cold, showing no sign of fear as he just huffed and rolled his eyes.
"You're insane. Just stay the fuck away from me."
Wade only shook his head with a grin a mile wide being concealed by his mask as he closed in on his quarry.
"Mm mm, sorry Peanut. But I think we've reached that point in our relationship where it's time to explore each other's bodies. Don't worry, I'll be gentle," he was a mere arm's length away now as Logan bristled up and snarled at him; his claws shooting back out of his fists.
"Wade, I'm not joking. Do NOT fuckin' touch me, or so help me I'll splatter your brains all over the walls of this fucking cab!"
"Ooooh getting a little defensive there," the merc pauses as he turns his head to look out at the audience, now speaking in a husky whisper, "I love it when they play hard to get. Time to enact my elaborate and well-thought-out plan..."
Deadpool lurched back with an act of surprise and flailed his arms around in a frenzy before pointing out the window behind where Logan sat.
"Holy shit! Look! It's Johnny! Oh thank God! He's alive!"
Logan had absolutely no idea why he turned around to look. He knew damn well that there was going to be no one there. Maybe it was his nerves finally getting to him as he came to the realization that this crazy freak of a man was seriously about to tickle him.
Wade delayed not a second as he threw himself onto Logan and tackled him back into the cushions where he got his bigger frame trapped between the seats, ending up with Wolverine's claws plunged into both sides of his ribcage.
"Ouchie! Hahaha! Just kidding! Johnny's still dead, you dummy! Now it's tickle time!" He buried his dancing fingers into Logan's stomach as the man growled and clenched his teeth while beginning to squirm underneath him. 
"Grrrrggggh! Wade! Motherfuc-Get the fuck offa me!" He yanked his claws out of Wade's sides and continued to frantically stab into his body. Really he wanted to slice the other man's arms off to get him to stop, but the way he was wedged between the seats didn't give him very much room to move his arms efficiently.
"Awww are you trying to tickle me back? How fun! But you know, you really need to work on your technique. Something more like this would work a loooot better....," Wade's hands moved up to tickle his ribs, pressing in hard to make sure to get through the X-man's thick uniform top as Logan bucked and snorted while he tried to hold himself together.
"St-Stop! Goddammit! Stop ticklin' me, ya prihihick!" A regrettable giggle escaped him, and he knew he'd lost any hope that Wade would lay off of him now.
"Ahh now we're getting somewhere. Looks like you really are ticklish, huh?" His hands continued squeezing up and down Logan's sides with rapid speed.
"I never...ssssaid I wasn't-Gahah! Stupid ahahasshole-Aahahahaha!" Logan finally couldn't keep it in any longer as gruff laughter spilled out of him and the power behind his stabbings grew weaker and weaker.
"That is so true. Thank you for pointing that out. You wanna go ahead and do that for me? Hm? You wanna tell me how ticklish you are? How the mighty Wolverine absolutely cannot take the tickles? C'moooon, tell daddy all about it," Wade grinned as he was rewarded with a hard snort from Logan as he unsuccessfully tried to regain control of his laughter.
"Fuhuhuhuck yooooou-ahahahahahaah! Okay okay I'm.....," he wheezed much to Wade's amusement, "I'm seheeheeheerious! That's enohohough!"
"Oh no, this is just getting good. Pretty sure you've had this coming for a long time now, big guy. This may sound crazy, but I'm guessing you don't get tickled very often. Which is a damn shame because look how adorably ticklish you are!" Wade cooed teasingly while kneading his fingers into Logan's belly again as more snorty laughs bubbled out of him.
"I hahahate you sohohohooo fuhuhuhucking muhuhuhuch!" By now Logan had completely abandoned his attempts to stab Wade as he realized that it was pointless and now tried using his arms to guard his sensitive torso while continuing to writhe helplessly.
"Don't say such things, my squirmy wormy. I promise I'll grow on ya. Like a hemorrhoid sure, but that's all semantics. Tell you what, if you promise to refer to me as Marvel Jesus for the rest of the movie I'll let you up right now."
"As soohoohoon ahahas ya let mehehehehe uhup-eehehehehhehehe-I'm g-gonna fuhuhucking kill yooohoou!" Logan bellowed out, but the way he was giggling and pathetically making attempts to push Wade's hands away gave the appearance that he was far from being able to kill anyone right now.
"Ooooh someone's a little sassy pants. Not exactly smart to mouth off to someone who's tickling the crap out of you, but I get the impression you're more of an act before thinking kinda guy. That's alright, we'll tickle that shitty attitude right out of you."
Logan was able to get his big forearms crossed over his stomach in defense, prompting Wade to quickly scope out another target for his tickling barrage as he lunged forward and managed to jam his hands past Logan's clenched biceps up into his armpits.
"Nohohohooooo.....," Logan's thundering guffaw broke up into a long, airy wheeze as he thrashed about in silence for a few moments with Wade delighting in his reactions.
"Awww look at you. Wolverine's not such a tough guy. You just have to know how to pet him and then he's just a cute little helpless Wolvie, isn't he? Does that tickle too much? Does it? Coochie coochie coo!" He pushed his fingers in further to wiggle deep into the soft center of the armpits while the feral mutant convulsed in spasms before finding his voice again.
"Shhh-Shhhihihihit! Hahahahahaahaa! You're dehehehehehead!"
Wade sharply tilted his head in disbelief.
"Really? Still being a grumpy cunt after all this joy and laughter I've brought to you? I was sure you'd be thanking me by now. Hmmm maybe I'm not trying hard enough. You know what? Yes, I think I have just the thing." 
The merc pulled his mask up past his nose before shoving Logan's arms out of the way and yanking up his uniform top, exposing a hairy wall of tightly packed abdominal muscles that Wade was nearly distracted by before refocusing on the task at hand.
"Time for a blow job!" Wade quickly dove his face straight into Logan's belly and began blowing a very ticklish array of raspberries all over as the tough Xman exploded into hysterics.
"Bwwaaahahahaah! You fuhuhuhuhuck! Ahahahahahaha! Stahahap ihihihit! Stahahahahahahaaap! I'll kihihihihilll yoohoohooou! Baaahaahaahahahahah! Fuhuhuhuhuhuuuuck! That tihihihickles!  N-Nohohohohoahahahahahhahaha! Pleeheeheeease!"
Wade almost stopped in shock as that last word played over his ears. He had neared the point of getting Wolverine to beg for mercy, which he would most certainly never do when tortured under any other circumstances. That seriously put it all into perspective for him of just how ticklish the big lug really was.
Having gotten this far he wanted to push it more. Logan's stomach was clearly a major weak spot and with the right technique he was confident that he could drive some forbidden words from his lips. 
The loud farting noise his mouth made as he blew long and hard right into Logan's bellybutton echoed throughout the whole vehicle along with the screaming laugh that burst out of Logan's chest as he momentarily levitated off of the seat cushion.
Several fantasies began playing through Wade's head as he pictured Wolverine completely breaking down and begging profusely for mercy. That would give him the ultimate bragging rights for sure. Unfortunately, his devious thoughts had distracted him far too much. 
Logan had desperately been looking for a way out of this situation and now was his chance. He had to act fast before he was literally tickled to death. 
With a twist of his body, he managed to lift one of his legs to put a foot against Wade's stomach and violently kick him away, sending the merc flying back towards the front of the van with a surprised yelp.
Grateful for the tickling to finally end Logan immediately sat up and tried to catch his breath while Deadpool again had to turn himself over from his current upside-down position where he had landed on his head.
"God...dammit.....I told ya....to fucking....stop....," Logan panted as he glared dangerously at Wade, who simply scoffed and gave him a dismissive hand.
"Oh don't be so dramatic! It was just a little tickling. Besides a guy like you should be able to take ten times worse than that."
Logan's only reply was a vicious snarl and the snikt sound of his claws coming out as he got up and began to approach the now wide-eyed merc.
"Woah woah, take it easy! It was all in good fun! You don't have to pull that big macho act on me. You can't fool me, I know you were having fun too, right Logan? Uh.........Right?"
"............."
A few minutes later and Wade found his whole body completely wrapped up and restrained by all of the seat belts in the van with them even covering his entire face and preventing him from uttering more than muffled words.
"Hmph. Finally figured out a way to shut you up," Logan smirked as Deadpool squirmed in his prison of seatbelt webbing; able to hear but unable to see and speak clearly.
"It's true what they say, silence is golden. And I definitely prefer you as bein' the merc without the mouth. Whaddya think about that?" He reached over and tickled his fingers over an exposed area on Wade's side, producing muffled chuckles as his thrashing increased.
"Well I certainly ain't letting you get one up on me. Besides, you like this ticklin' stuff, don't ya? Don't worry, it's all in good fun. Unlike you though, I promise not to be gentle." 
One hand dug hard into vulnerable ribs and the other into his thigh as Wade made a futile attempt to scream for mercy.
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fluffi-dragon · 11 months ago
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Pick On Someone Your Own Size || Deadpool & Wolverine (2024) Tickle Fic
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Summary: Wade is tired of Logan constantly poking fun at Mary Poppins' appearance and decides to teach the man a lesson. Unfortunately for Wade, Logan is more than capable of teaching a few lessons of his own.
Warnings: Canon-typical language and allusions to violence.
Requested by the lovely @just-a-fluffy-knight!
Wade liked to consider himself a patient man (he was, in fact, the farthest thing from it). However, there was only so much injustice one man could witness before he was obligated by the universe to intervene, and Wade was quickly approaching that point with Logan. Why, you may ask? Did Logan drink the last of the beer and forget to buy more? Did he leave the toilet seat up when Vanessa came to visit? Did he beat Wade in a particularly nasty game of poker?
Yes, he had done all of those things, but what was REALLY grinding the mercenary's gears was Logan's insistence on making fun of their newly acquired canine friend.
“It looks like a rat with fucking mange.”
“Did the poor little batard get dropped as a puppy or something?”
“She’s staring at both of us at once, that’s creepy as shit.”
“Seriously, that is the ugliest fucking dog I’ve ever seen.”
One or two, Wade could deal with, but he simply could not stand by and allow his precious little angel to continue being subject to such a brutal assault on her cuteness. No, it was time to make a stand!
“Alright, that’s it!” Wade sat straight up, turning to face the perpetual grump currently lounging a few feet away at the opposite end of the couch. “I’ve had it up to HERE with the bullying, mister! Haven’t you watched those cheesy PSAs they used to air on Disney Channel?”
Logan averted his gaze from the television, his eyebrows raised. “The fuck are you talking about?” He rumbled.
“You know what I’m talking about!” Wade retorted, pointing an accusatory finger at the other man. “You’ve been ragging on our poor, sweet Mary Poppins all week!”
“The dog?” Logan asked, clearly exasperated.
“Yes, the dog! Quite frankly, I’ve had enough of the ableist comments about her cute little mug, Peanut.”
“You honestly think that THING is cute? You’re more delusional than I thought.”
At that moment, Wade made a lunge for Logan. He knew it was stupid, he really did. He knew it was practically a death wish, but damn it, he never claimed to be a smart man, okay? By some work of god or luck, the mercenary had seemingly caught the other off guard, with Logan letting out a loud yelp as he was forcefully pushed back against the sofa cushions.
“What the FUCK do you think you’re doing?!” He growled, eyes narrowed. “Get the hell off of me!”
“No can do, bucko. I think it’s time I taught you some manners.” Wade retorted, hands working to fend off Logan’s attempts to push him away. “Would you hold still? Fucking hell, I haven’t even done anything yet!!”
A snort tore from Logan’s throat, a smirk tugging at his lips. “You? Teach ME some manners? That’s fucking rich!” His hips gave a particularly harsh buck, nearly dislodging Wade in the process. The mercenary yelped, torso flinging forwards as his hands instinctively latched onto Logan’s sides for support.
At that precise moment, something downright MAGICAL happened, dear readers. A high-pitched, startled sound erupted from Logan’s lips, accompanied by widened eyes and hitched breathes from both parties.
A giggle.
Logan Howlett, the Wolverine, fucking giggled.
The two stared at each other for a moment, neither moving or uttering a word. Then, a gigantic grin bloomed across Wade’s face, and Logan felt his heart jump into his throat.
“Oho, what do we have here?” Wade crooned, fingers still latched onto Logan’s torso but remaining unmoving. “Doth mine eyes deceive me, or did you just-”
“I didn’t do shit, you’re just hearing shit, ya nutcase.” Logan growled, steeling his features as he held Wade’s gaze with as much confidence he could muster. “Just get the fuck off of me, you fucking prick!”
“Nooo, I definitely heard something!” Wade’s excitement was growing by the second, and Logan didn’t like it one bit. He gave the X-Man’s sides another quick squeeze, and while Logan was prepared enough to hold back any noises this time around, he still gave a sharp flinch at the touch. “Holy fucking shit, Batman! You’re ticklish, aren’t you? Aaaw, isn’t that just precious?” He cooed with delight.
“I swear, if you don’t-” Logan started, his lips slamming shut as Wade’s fingers began to wiggle into his muscular sides, squeezing just above the hips every so often. Shit, he couldn’t let WADE of all people break him with something so fucking stupid! He would never hear the end of it! Logan took a desperate swipe at Wade’s ribcage, claws sliding out in preparation to dig into the merc’s flesh, but Wade was a step ahead of him, immediately taking the opportunity to dig into the newly exposed armpit.
Well, fuck.
“Shihihihihihihit!” Logan cursed loudly, slamming his arm down in an attempt to protect the sensitive spot but only succeeding in trapping the mischievous fingers there.
“I knew it! The big, bad badger is tickwish, isn’t he? Isn’t he?” Wade crowed, talking to the other as if he were talking to a baby. Logan felt his cheeks warm as he tossed his head from side to side, their shade no doubt rivaling the red of Wade’s suit.
“Shuhuhuhut up!” Logan snapped, hating the way a barrage of giggles immediately interrupted his words the moment he opened his mouth. “Lehehehet go, motherfuhuhucker!”
“After all of those cruel, cruel things you said about dear Poppins? Ooh no, I think you’ve earned yourself an EXTENDED session with the tickle monster, tough guy. Besides, do you HEAR yourself right now? You’re way too cute to just STOP!”
“I’m nohohot fuhuhuhuckin’ cuhuhuhuhuhute! I’ll kihihihihill yohohohou!” Logan threatened, chest shaking with titters as a soft wheeze rang through the air. “Cuhuhuhuhuhut it ohohohohout!”
Wade was most certainly NOT going to cut it out. Damn it, there was a certain group of people on their internet whose mouths would WATER at the chance to reduce THE Wolverine to such a giggly state, and by god, Wade was going to do just that (in their honor, of course). His fingers spidered up to Logan’s ribs, beginning to scratch between each bone as he counted loudly. “One ticklish wittle rib, two tickwish wittle ribs…”
Logan’s cheeks turned a few shades redder, his laughter increasing in pitch in a manner the man found downright mortifying. “Shuhuhuhut up, shuhuhuhut uhuhuhup, shuhuhuhuhut uhuhuhuhup! Fuhuhuhuhuck!” His legs kicked frantically against the couch, claws digging into the cushions as a snort tore through his giggling.
Wade couldn’t hold back a cackle of his own. “Oh my god, was that a SNORT? You SNORT? Are you sure you aren’t a pig instead of a badger?” He smirked, giving up on counting in favor of taking his fingers back down Logan’s ribcage towards his stomach. “What’s the matter? All these muscles not helping too much in the ticklish department? Does this make you wanna squeal real good? Come on, Peanut, squeal nice and pretty for me!”
Logan let out another loud wheeze, back arching before crashing back onto the sofa, laughter pouring out of him in waves as Wade began to ruthlessly claw at his stomach. “FUHUHUHUHUCKING STAHAHAHAHAP, YOHOHOHOHOU ASS!” He howled, eyes squeezed shut with mirth as he desperately attempted to suck in his stomach. “DAHAHAHAMN IT, NOOOOHOHOHOHOOO!”
Wade grinned wolfishly, his tickling picking up the pace at Logan’s increased hysterics. “Uh oh, it looks like we’ve hit a sweet spot! Does the wittle badger have a tickwish wittle tummy? Does he?” He crooned. He was SCREWED when Logan inevitably freed himself, he knew that, but Wade was okay with digging his own grave. The chance to make the big grump SHRIEK was just too enticing.
The feeling of a finger wiggling in his navel was what finally did it. Logan let out a downright precious squeal, laughter going wild as he wrenched his hands upwards (now claw free), seizing Wade by the hips and flinging him backwards. The mercenary’s back his the arm of the couch, eyes wide with shock. “Alright, alright! Calm down, buddy! Let’s save the rough stuff for the bedroom, yeah?”
Logan collapsed back against the cushions, panting as his arms instinctively wrapped around his still tingling torso. His eyes narrowed, an effect completely ruined by the lingering laughter at his lips. “Fuhuhuhucking hell! What was that for?” He huffed.
Wade gave a little shrug. “Well, at first it was to make you stop being such a jackass to our beloved canine friend, but then you just had the cutest little giggle and I just couldn’t help myself.” He grinned coyly. “Don’t act like you weren’t having fun! You could have stabbed me at any time, but you didn’t, did you? Because you liiiked it!”
The X-Man felt like his ears and cheeks were on fire, and he wanted nothing more than to shut the prick up, but he just couldn’t bring himself to kick Wade’s ass (perhaps because the mercenary’s words held a bit of truth to them). After a moment, however, Logan returned Wade’s smile, although his had a FAR more intimidating undertone. “You like tickling me so badly? Let’s see how you fucking like it, huh?”
As Logan slowly began to move forward, looking downright MENACING with that gleam in his eye, Wade felt his heart start racing. Instinctively, he raised his hands as he attempted to stand up, only to be immediately tugged back down as Logan took ahold of his wrists. “Now, Logan! W-We can talk about this, right?” He chuckled nervously. In the blink of an eye, Logan had him pressed on his back against the couch, smirking down at him in a manner that was downright villainous. “Gee, if you wanted to be on top so badly, you could have just-”
“You just never know when to shut up.”
Fingers dug into the mercenary’s sides, clawing and wiggling with sheer ruthlessness in their mission to make Wade SHRIEK. In mere seconds, they succeeded.
“Fuhuhuhuhuhuhucking Christ! Hohold on, hold ohohohon! Waaaaahahahahait!” Wade squealed, clumsily fumbling for Logan’s wrists as he immediately burst into a wave of high-pitched giggling.
“Jesus, you couldn’t even last a second? I knew you’d be bad, but this is fucking ridiculous.” Logan chuckled, delighting in the way Wade collapsed with titters at the assault on his sides. “Looks like someone can’t take a taste of his own medicine, can he? And you said I’M the ticklish one…”
Wade shook his head, wishing for the security of his suit as he felt his cheeks turning a bright red. “Fuhuhuhuhuck you! Dohohohohohon’t! Eeeeehehehehahahahaaa!” He forced out, eyes squinty with giddy mirth. “Y-Yohohohouou are SOHOHOHO muhuhuhuch wohohohohorse!”
Logan raised a brow. “Still sassing me? You have no sense of self-preservation, do ya?”
Wade let out a borderline SCREECH as Logan’s hands found their way into his armpits, arms snapping down in a frantic, vain attempt to protect themselves. “OHOHOHOHO SHIT! N-NOHOHOHOHOHOOO! CUHUHUHUT IT OHOHOHOUT!” Wade giggled shrilly. “Y-YOHOHOHOU’LL MAHAHAKE ME LOOK BAHAHAHAD IN FROHOHOHOHONT OF THE REHEHEHEADERS!”
“I don’t have a fucking clue what you’re talking about, but this seems like a good spot. How about we stay here for a bit, yeah?” Wade WAILED as one of Logan’s hands decided to dart down and experimentally squeeze one of his thighs. “Or how about right here? Vanessa mentioned these being SUPER FUCKING TICKLISH at the Christmas party back in December.”
“SHEHEHE DIHIHIHIHID WHAHAHAT?!”
“I’m just fucking with you, it was a lucky guess, and a pretty damn good one going by that reaction. Now, let’s see if I can tickle a fucking apology out of you for your little stunt, shall we?”
“BRIHIHIHIHING IT OHOHOHOHOHON, PIGLET!”
“Oh, you’re playing that card again? You SO deserve this now..”
“Wahahahait, what are you doing? Lohohogan, Logan nohohohohooo! Dohohohon’t you fuhuhuhucking do it! I’ll kill you, motherfucker! LohohoGAHAHAHAAHAHAAAN!”
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fluffi-dragon · 11 months ago
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A Not so Relaxing Break
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Okay so I wanted to write for these two soooo bad. But I had to wait until I could actually see the movie lmao. Anyway the movie was incredible! Enjoyed every second. Seeing Logan officially return is just so amazing and I’m so exited because I love his character so much. Also, I’m thinking of maybe doing a part two for this fix because I really wanted to write lee!Wade but got tired lol. Anyway please enjoy this fic!
Warnings: Lots of cussing, and some crude jokes (this is a Deadpool fanfic)
Summery: Logan just cant seem to catch a break with Wade
Logan sighed as he rubbed his eyes a bit. The fire was heating him up nicely, but it made him a bit sleepy. Wade sat next to him him, mesmerized by the flames.
“Yknow peanut… I’m only saying this because I’m getting a more intimate vibe right now, but I would love to fuck you right here right now if we had a softer surface.”
Logan just stared deadpannedly at the fire. He was slowly becoming more accustomed to Wades shenanigans and jokes.
“Does everything with you have to be perverted?” He asked wearily.
Wade grinned. “Yup. It’s kind of important to my character.”
Logan was about to tell him how that wasn’t something to be proud of, but thought better of It. He wasn’t about to entertain his nonsense more.
Wade sighed. “Man I am bored. I feel like we’ve been here for hours.”
Logan raised an eyebrow. “It’s only been ten minutes.”
Wade scoffed playfully. “And how would you know genius?”
Logan rolled his eyes. “It’s a rough estimate, dipshit.”
Wade scoffed again, this time in mock offense. “How dare you! I’ll have you know that I am a proud dipshit! At least I don’t have the fattest stick up my ass like a fucking human puppet. I’m trying so hard to pull it out of you but goddamnit, you’re a fighter.”
Suddenly after that, there was a sudden noise. A small coughing, snorty type noise. Wade looked at Logan, a bit surprised. No fucking way…
“Hold on… you almost laughed… you thought that was funny…” Wade said, slowly smiling under his mask. It was a statement of realization.
Logan quickly frowned, clearing his throat again and dragging his hand down his mouth, and shrugged. “Uh. No… no I didn’t...”
Wade wasn’t about to let this go. “No… no no no… you think I’m funny… you laughed… you liked that joke…” his grin only widened under his mask.
“Look, I didn’t laugh. I… had an itch in my throat…”
“Oh you fucking liar!” Wade said with a chuckle. His finger poking out towards Logan.
Logan stiffened up and pushed at his hand.
“Stop it…” Logan growled tensely.
“I don’t believe it! My favorite little power bottom is finally gaining a sense of humor! Good for you!”
Logan rolled his eyes. “Shut up already.”
Wade only took that as an invitation to keep going.
“Come on… just admit I’m funny…” he said, trying to poke at his side. Logan tensed up more and growled slightly, trying to swat Wades hand away.
“N-never… in a m-million… years…” he managed out through clenched teeth, trying to push at Wades hands.
“What’s this…? Am I making you… tense~?” The merc with a mouth grinned. He poked more as Logan tried to push him off.
Suddenly he jabbed his lower ribs, and the Wolverine let out a yelp.
Wade grinned more. “I don’t believe it. The Wolverine is not only gaining a sense of humor, but he’s ticklish too? Incredible.”
“Stay the fuck away from me you pervert.”Logan glared.
Suddenly Wade had tackled him to the ground of the forest. Making sure it was sudden enough that Logan wouldn’t have the time to react. He immediately attacked the man’s sides.
Logan sucked in a sharp inhale, trying to hold in laughter.
“Come on Wolvie-Wolvie~ Even depressing and tragic grumps like you are allowed to laugh~” Wade grinned as he scratched his fingers up his yellow suited friends ribs.
Logan could only squirm and push against him, but it was no use.
“D-Damn… y-you… AH! Fuhuhuhuck!!!” Logan cried out with new released laughter when Wade found his stomach, digging in gently.
Wade tisked and mockingly shook his head. “Language you bad wolf cub. Does daddy wolf need to punish you?"
"F-Fuhuhuck y-yohohohhuuu!!!" Logan protested in his laughter, squirming and kicking under him.
Wade laughed and continued his relentless attack. “Oh this is just amazing!”
Logan finally managed to lift his hands and unleashed his adamantium claws, swinging them towards Wade.
“Oops…! Play nice now…” Wade grinned more and grabbed his wrists. He crossed them as if they were square hand bag handles above his head. Logan almost broke free from the grip, but the poor mutant weakened when Wade began to use his free hand, and gently scratch at his now vulnerable ribs.
Logan arched his back slightly. He tried to hold it in, but failed as low and wheezy laughter escaped.
“Ohohoho shihihihihittt ahahahaha Whahahahade yohohohohu ahahahasshohohole!!!” Logan cried out, trying to sound angry. However it’s hard for one to sound angry when helplessly laughing against their will.
Wade just grinned at the sight. “This is amazing. To think that the cool tough and strong Wolverine could be weakened by just a few fingers? Never would I have believed it.”
He went down to his lower ribs next, this time going just behind his side, right at the back corner of his lowest rib, and Logan let out a loud strained noise, which sounded awfully like a half restrained squeal.
“Holy fuck it just gets better. Did you just squeal? Is this your weak spot Wolvie?” Wade grinned, cooing at the poor adamantium built man as he gently dug more into the spot.
“Y-YOHOhOhuhuh FUHUhUhcKIHIhING DIhIHIHCK STOHOHOHPP!!!”
He arched his back a bit as Wade poked around the spot.
At this point Logan’s face was bright red. His eyes watering a bit from the laughter. When Wade started deeply massaging into the spot he let out a peal of cackles, tea kettle wheezing.
Wade realized maybe this was a bit too much. Maybe he deserved a break.
He slowly stopped, getting off of him as the yellow suited mans laughter died down a bit. Logan lay there, panting heavily and trying to catch his breath.
Wade grinned at the mess he made of him. “Sorry. I can be a little rough. Want some after ca- GYAH!” Wade cried out as Logan pounced and pinned him firmly down, growling a bit at him.
Wade looked at him nervously. “C-can… we talk about this? I mean… you… you wouldn’t resort to something so childish right…?”
Silence. Then…
“Screw you, dipshit.”
And before he knew it, Wade was thrown into hysterical laughter and squirming wildly as the Wolverine started clawing at any spot he can reach.
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fluffi-dragon · 11 months ago
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A Small Lapse of Judgement
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What do you get when you cross a drunk Wolverine? Tickled. You get tickled. 🤣
Okay, yeah sorry guys. This one is literally like twice as long as my last one, but Logan and Wade both needed to get wrecked good. lol I'm just having too much fun writing these guys. So get some snacks or something because you're going to be here for a minute.
More somewhat movie spoilers, and Wade saying inappropriate things to Logan's annoyance. lol Oh, and of course tons of cussing. And tickles. Lots of tickles.
"Deadpool and Wolverine"-verse
M/M Tickle Fic
Word Count: 4,372
At first Logan had declined Wade's invitation to live with him at his apartment. Having been on his own for so long Logan didn't want to accept the fact that anyone actually wanted him around, but after Wade's persistent prodding and convincing he finally accepted.
"Yes!! It'll be like a sexy slumber party!" Wade had whooped, but one steely-eyed look from Logan made him turn it down, "Ahem. Or, you know, just two guys hanging out together with no lewd activities of any kind...."
No doubt Wade pushed Logan's buttons and got on his nerves more than anyone he had ever met in his life, but after their ordeal together there was no denying the bond that had been created between the two of them. It was hard for him to admit it, but Wade was definitely someone Logan now considered as a friend.
Surprisingly he settled in quickly and had begun to make himself comfortable, allowing him to let his guard down and actually relax for once. It was only a one-bedroom apartment so even though he had to sleep out on the couch every night he was grateful to have a place to call home.
And Wade was thrilled to have him there. Unlike his other roommate, Blind Al, Logan was progressively becoming more tolerant of his off the wall antics so it was nice to have someone else there that he could really joke around with. And drink with, though Logan still tended to embark on some solo day drinking of his own.
Wade shuffled into the living room in his crocs one late evening with Dogpool cradled in his arm to find Logan slouched over on the couch in nothing but jeans and a tank top and a nearly empty bottle of whiskey in his hand. Further observation revealed there to be two more empty bottles laying around on the ground by his feet.
"Hey. Robert Downey Jr. Wanna take it easy on the booze?"
Logan lazily looked up at him, rolling his eyes when he saw Wade was allowing the dog to lick all over his face.
"I will once ya take it easy on always making out with that mutt."
Wade stared at him in defiance as he continued to kiss Dogpool's head while she licked all around his mouth, making Logan grimace in disgust before Wade set her down upon the ten-sizes-too-big dog bed he had bought for her.
"You know if you were jealous all you had to do was ask, baby girl. There's plenty of Wade Wilson to go around," he leaped onto the couch beside Logan and puckered his lips, making smooching sounds as he tried to pull the other man close while Logan cursed and struggled to hold him back.
"Hey hey! Fucking knock it off, asshole!" Despite his annoyance he chuckled a little with the alcohol lightening his mood and after a few more seconds Wade finally relented to sit himself back.
"You can fight it all you want, but I know you'll come around one day. There's no resisting my natural labido," Wade sat facing him as he gave a wink and a flirty grin, causing Logan to sigh with a shake of his head and take another sip from the bottle.
"See this is exactly why I still drink. I need something to help tolerate your obnoxious ass on a daily basis."
"Fine by me. It has its benefits. Number one being that you're so much less stabby when you're like this," Wade teased, wiggling a finger into his side as Logan squirmed and giggled before swatting at his hand with boozed up coordination.
"Why are ya always tickling me? I hate that shit," Logan was still smiling though as he rubbed at his irritated ribs.
"Because," Wade smiled and turned to look out at the audience before whispering quietly under his breath, "The people demand it."
He sat staring in silence for several seconds until Logan lifted a brow in confusion.
"The fuck you looking at?"
"Nothing," Wade turned back to him, "Well it's because I have to make you laugh somehow, grumpy pants. You're always so serious, and worst of all you never laugh at my jokes."
"Oh yeah? Have ya tried actually being funny?"  A big shit eating grin was plastered on Logan's face as he instinctively pulled his arms in close to his body, not expecting Wade to let that one slide.
"Ooh hoo hoo, you're going to pay for that one later. You know what, smart ass? Maybe I'll tickle you in front of Laura. I'm sure she'd love to help me double team you sometime. A little badger on badger action, if you will." 
It was Wade's turn to smirk as Logan just looked back at him with nervous eyes that he tried to hide behind the scowl now creasing over his face.
"You'd better fuckin' not."
"I don't know. It's sounding like a pretty good idea to me. Usually I have to pay to see that kind of thing but-"
Logan growled as his claws started to come out, but Wade just laughed and wagged a finger at him.
"Ah ah ah! Rule number one, no bloodshed in the house. So best keep those claws of yours in check, my little kitty cat."
"Just don't give me a reason then," Logan warned, retracting the claws before his eyes raised to focus on Wade's head, "By the way, how long are ya gonna keep wearing that stupid toupee? I already told you that you ain't foolin' anyone with that thing."
Wade looked positively insulted as he patted and smoothed down the hair on his head.
"Uhmm excuse me? As I've told you a thousand times, it's a hair system. It's so I can go out in public looking halfway decent. Not all of us were blessed with the perfect bone structure of a successful Broadway actor," turns his head briefly to look at the camera, "And besides, I think it looks quite distinguished."
"I've seen better looking roadkill than whatever that thing's made out of," Logan snorted and downed the rest of the bottle in his hand before dropping it on the floor beside the other empty bottles.
"Says the guy who looks like he has roadkill glued to the sides of his face," Wade gave a less than gentle tug on his muttonchops as Logan grunted and smacked his hand away.
"Oh yeah? Well at least I can grow facial hair, pal. You on the other hand don't have a speck of hair on your whole goddamn body. You're like a fucking pre-pubescent child. This is what a real man looks like," a tipsy smirk crawled across his face as he nonchalantly pulled up his tank top to show off his hairy chest and stomach.
He emphasized his point by running a hand over his hirsute, muscular torso while Wade just stared very, very hard.
"........Are you trying to turn me on right now? Because it's working," Wade was smiling deviously and reaching a hand out as Logan chuckled dryly and gave him a hard shove, sending him flying to the other end of the couch, "Just so you know, I'm adding that one to the spank bank."
"You fucking wish, bub. Think ya got a better chance with that ugly ass dog of yours," he nodded over towards the sleeping pooch while tugging his shirt back down. 
It was rare to see such a repulsed look on Wade's face as the man always seemed to be down for whatever but apparently messing with the dog was where he drew a line.
"Woah woah, that's just going too far now. You need therapy, my friend."
"Oh please. I forgot you were the fucking poster child for mental stability," Logan muttered as he lifted his legs to prop his bare feet up on the coffee table in front of him.
"Heyheyhey! What in the ever-living fuck do you think you are doing? That's where we cut up our Bolivian nose candy-"
"I thought Feige said ya can't talk about that."
"Well what Feige doesn't know won't hurt him. Now let's go. Chop chop. Feet off the table, bud," Wade scolded and kicked Logan in the leg as the man rolled his eyes and begrudgingly pulled his feet down.
"You are such a fucking caveman. That table is an antique. Furniture crafted from the finest-OOof!" Wade grunted in pain as Logan dropped his feet onto his lap with his heel coming down hard onto his groin, "Uh uh nope. Not happening. Feet off the Deadpool too." 
"Well I gotta put 'em somewhere. What? Offended that ya weren't my first choice? Be flattered I finally found a good use for you," Logan smirked big time at the genuine outrage that now displayed on Wade's face.
"What the fuck do you mean?! You've seen what a phenomenal cook I am!"
"Almost burned down the apartment."
"I'm the king of late-night karaoke!"
"Got the cops called on us three times already."
"Well I'm good at making friends everywhere I go."
"I had to beat the shit out of all those bikers to get them off of you. Not to mention you almost got us banned from my favorite bar, you dumb fuck."
Wade started to pout from Logan shooting down all of his claims, but was quickly back to grinning as he thought of something that Logan couldn't possibly argue against.
"Okay, you know what? You wanna see something I'm good at? I'll show you something I'm very good at," Wade smirked and grabbed ahold of Logan's legs, securing his ankles in one arm as he began ruthlessly tickling the bottoms of his feet.
Logan lost any sense of calm he had as he immediately broke into a hysterical laughing fit, figuring out too late that he had made a huge mistake. There weren't many things in life that could get the Wolverine to lose his cool, but Wade Wilson the Tickle Monster never failed.
"Baahahahahahaha! Wahahahahade, dohohohon't!! Okaahaahaahaay! I'll mooohoohoove 'em!!"
Logan was far too buzzed to pull his usual act of fighting back his reactions and trying to pretend that he wasn't as horribly sensitive as he really was. Not that any of that ever discouraged Wade since he knew he'd always get him to crack eventually.
"Nah, that's okay. You just keep them right where they are, Giggles. Maybe this'll teach you some manners. Or not, that's okay too. I wouldn't want to run out of excuses to do this....," he scratched at the soles with Logan going nuts and frantically pulling at his captured legs while Wade's arm only squeezed tighter around them to ensure he wouldn't escape.
"Stahahahaaap, ya dihihihick! Fuhuhuhuckin' lehehehehe-lehehet me gohohohohooo!"
"What's that? Aww did you forget your safe word again? So confusing. How do I know if you really want me to stop or not?" The merc teased with his fingers scribbling at Logan's arches as the X-man's laughter surged in volume.
"Fuhuhuhuhuck you! Aaaheheeheeheehee nohohoho! Waahaait! I'm sohohohohorry!" He howled with tears already in his eyes as Wade found the weak spots under his toes; his body twisting and flopping around as he braced his arms on the couch in his clumsy attempts to get free.
Wade always enjoyed when Logan was in this state. Not only was he a lot less homicidal than if he was sober but he wasn't nearly as uptight and didn't even fight the tickles as hard. He practically just rolled over and took it and didn't hold much back. 
He suspected that Logan didn't hate being tickled nearly as much as he made out and loved to tease him about it much to the older man's insistent denial of the fact. It's likely that Logan would rather die than ever admit something like that.
Wade then cleared his throat and began to speak in his best exaggerated Australian accent.
"Crikey mate! Here we have the Wolverine. Best known for its violent tendencies and natural ability to be a complete jackass. When confronted by a stronger and more powerful predator it begins to make the most adorable snorting sounds that are meant as a sign of his submission. Let's listen in, shall we?"
Logan had been belting out uncontrollable snorts all throughout his laughter and it was one of Wade's favorite things to poke fun at him for.
"Shhh-Shuhuhuhut uhuhuhup! You're sohohohoho fuhuhucking stuhuhuhupid!"
"Oh, I'm fucking stupid? Who's the one making all the little piggy noises, Wilbur? Speaking of piggies....," Wade smirked as he started to play with his toes again, "This little piggy was an alcoholic....This little piggy was always so mean to his friend, Wade.....This little piggy talked shit about sweet little Dogpool....This little piggy..."
"Fuhuhuhuhuuuck! Alrihihihihight I gihihihive uhuhup! Haahahahaah! No-No mohohohore!" Logan had managed to pull a foot free and was now kicking Wade in the back as hard as he could, which wasn't very hard at all due his weakened state from laughing so much.
"No more? No MORE? Sorry, sweet cheeks. But I've got plenty more," Wade then threw his foot aside as he turned and dove onto Logan's prone form to now attack his very ticklish stomach, "That was for treating me like an object! This is for saying I'm not funny!"
Wade snickered with glee as the feral man expelled a less than manly squeal of giggles and immediately curled into a protective ball, though all attempts to evade were useless. Deadpool was positively relentless.
"Nooooohohohohohoo nohohohot thehehehehere! Okahahaay you're funny! You're fuhuhuhuhuhunnyyyyyaaahahahahahaaStaahahahahahaaap!"
"Oh sure! All of a sudden I'm just magically funny now! Don't insult my intelligence! You can't bullshit a bullshitter!" Wade managed to get his hands underneath Logan's shirt, raking his fingers up and down his bare stomach and forcing him to dissolve into a lengthy, mirthful wheeze.
"Why are you so ticklish? Is it part of your mutation? A result of a Weapon X experiment gone horribly wrong? Talk, damn you! I need answers!"
Not that Wade actually expected him to answer, but Logan was laughing entirely too hard and fighting it even less. He had his head thrown back in hysterics that exposed his oversized canines, writhing feebly while tears were leaking down his reddened cheeks.
It was a sight to see the normally powerful X-man rendered helpless from such a soft touch, but it just goes to prove that healing factors and big muscles were completely useless against a tickle attack.
Wade would have loved to keep tickling him all night, and he knew the man technically could take it with the high amount of stamina he possessed, but it was time to let him go now and save it for another time. Logan had been a good sport, and he didn't want to push it too far.
Pulling his hands back he now stood triumphantly hovering over the still giggling and plastered Wolverine, who kept his body all curled up in case the crazy merc decided to come for him again.
"Are you sure you're the Wolverine of legends? I mean, this isn't exactly what I had pictured. If I hadn't personally seen you in action then I'd have some serious doubts," he smirked as Logan finally relaxed and slowly splayed out on the couch.
"Heehehehe-That's the worst Wolverine to you, bub. You-hehehee-fucking suck," Logan continued to giggle as he struggled to fight off the dizzying high of the combined tickle assault mixed with the alcohol in his bloodstream. Wade was pleased to see he hadn't soured his mood.
"But do I swallow is the real question? Hehehe, sorry, I couldn't help myself. Now did you learn your lesson, you drunken idiot?"
Logan regained some sense of focus as he slowly sat up and looked up at Wade with the most cocky grin.
"Of course not. Gonna take a lot more than that, fucker."
"Do not tempt me, Peanut. I showed you mercy this time, but I cannot guarantee this next round I will be as charitable," Wade smirked and cracked his knuckles, surprised to see Logan lean back onto the couch with his arms folded behind his head.
"Pffft. You don't fuckin' scare me. You can do your worst. Though I'm sorry to say you're not gonna get the chance. Ya wanna know why?"
"Why?" Wade practically demanded with his hands on his hips.
"That's why." Logan lifted a hand to point behind Wade as the merc whirled around to confront what may have got the drop on him and found.....nothing. Nobody.
"Wait a minute.....did I really just fall for the oldest trick in the bo-AAAHCK!" Wade let out a scream as he was pounced from behind by a playfully growling Wolverine and landed hard on his stomach with his face hitting the floor. He had seriously misjudged the other man's current ability to fight back.
"Heheh, you really are a fucking idiot. Now let's see how you like this shit...," Logan immediately dug into Wade's ribs from where he sat perched on his back and was more than thrilled by the scream that ripped out of the merc's mouth. He knew there was no way a loudmouth like Wade wouldn't be ticklish.
"Nohohooo Logan wahahahahaait! Ahahaheeheehehehehe! You cahahahan't tihihihickle meheheee! I'm-I'm the 'ler! Nohohot yooooou!"
"The what? What the hell are ya talkin' about now?" Logan didn't let up though while Wade tried to sputter out an explanation.
"The cohohohommunity! Ihihihit's a thihihiing! I g-guess tehehehechnically I'm a swihihihihitch buhuhuhut stihihill!"
Logan raised his brows, looking more confused than before as he ended up just shrugging it off and shaking his head.
"Nevermind. I really don't wanna know. Now shut up and laugh, asshole," Logan's big hands ran up and down his sides, squeezing his waist and making it back up into his armpits as Wade flailed and shrieked and desperately tried to clamp his arms down.
Logan couldn't help but laugh at Wade's reactions with how he had barely started in on him yet.
"Geez. Have ya really been this fucking ticklish this whole time? Looks like we've got some time to make up for," his fingers fluttered around under Wade's arms, producing wild cackles as he wriggled like a worm and tried to scoot across the floor.
"Get off get off! Nooohahahahahaha! I'm nohohohohot tihihihicklish! I'm nohohohohohohot!"
"Well if you're not ticklish then all this shouldn't be botherin' ya, right? Or do you prefer me stabbin' ya better?" Logan smirked as he used the three middle fingers on each hand to simulate his claws as he repeatedly poked at Wade's ribcage with rapid fire speed, "Hehe, now you're dead."
"Gaahaahahahahaha!! Nohohohohot the clahahahahaws! Mehehehehercy!" Wade begged, trying to reach behind him to smack Logan's hands away. Spoiler alert, it didn't work.
"Mercy? Ha! That's a fuckin' good one. Hey, whaddya know. I guess you are funny after all. Hehehe, tickle tickle tickle, fuckface."
Wade's hysterics were increasing in volume by the second and Logan snorted in amusement at the thought that they might get the cops called on them for a suspected murder happening in the apartment.
"Holy shit. Keep it down, will ya? You're gonna wake the-"
"What in the name of Satan's asshole is that horrible noise?!?!" Blind Al shouted in annoyance as she wandered into the room and nearly tripped over the two men roughhousing on the floor.
"Blind Al! Blind Ahahahahal! Hehehehelp mehehehehe!" Wade screamed as he managed to roll over underneath Logan and reach out a desperate hand towards his elderly roommate.
"You're such a dick. Ya know ya don't have to emphasize that she's blind all the time, ya inconsiderate moron," Logan rolled his eyes with a smile as he now had better access to Wade's ribs and stomach and dug right in.
"Baahahahah-Buhuhuhut thahahat's her nahahahahame! B-Becahahahause she's blihihihind! Gehehehet ihihit?!"
The older woman's lips pursed with disdain.
"Please keep torturing him. I will sleep good tonight knowing that stupid motherfucker is suffering," she gently patted Logan on the shoulder as she turned around and made her way out of the room.
"You got it, boss lady," Logan nodded with a smirk and scratched furiously at Wade's stomach, easily avoiding the flailing hands trying to stop him.
"Blihihihihind Al! Aahahhahahha! You trahahahaahaahaitor! Ahahahafter ahahall I've d-dohohohone for yooohoou!"
"Maybe you could gag his bitch ass too," she yelled back over her shoulder, making Logan chuckle.
"She's got a point. You're loud as fuck. Always makin' fun of how I snort while you're over here shrieking like a fuckin' little girl."
With that, Wade was struck with inspiration as he thought of a way to get Logan to stop.
"Yehehehes! Oh yehehehes Lohohohogan! Dohohohn't stop! Th-Thahahat's ihihihit! Tihihihickle me! Tihihickle mehehehe untihihihil I pahahahass ouhohout!" Wade pretended to moan between his laughs as he put his hands flat against the floor to demonstrate that he had no intention of preventing the tickling, though it was a major struggle for him to keep them there.
Logan tilted his head as he stared down at Wade in bemusement.
"Can't tell if you're tryin' to psyche me out into stopping, or if you really do like it that much. I wouldn't put it past ya to actually enjoy being tickled. Not the weirdest thing about you. Either way, if ya say not stop then I won't," Logan smirked and proceeded to tickle him even harder as he kneaded into his hips.
"Noooooohohohoooo! Okaahahaay! I lihihihied! I cahahahan't tahahahahake it! Pleasepleaseplease stooohahahahoooop!" Wade squealed and kicked his legs around and uselessly tried to grab at the other man's wrists to pry him off.
"Now was that really a lie? Are ya sure it wasn't an educated wish?" Logan loved to bring that stupid shit up every once in a while, knowing it would get under Wade's skin.
"So fuhuhuhunny I forgohohot to lahahahaugh, ahahahassole! Nohohow gehehet off meeeheeheeheee! You fuhuhuhucking mahahahade yohohohour point!" 
Logan was about to make another quip when he heard loud barking and turned his head to see Dogpool come flying over the back of the couch towards them in superhero slow-motion.
She then rushed in to grab Wade by the hair as she pulled with all of her tiny body weight trying to free him.
"Yehehehes! Mary Puhuhuhuppins! Saahahahave pa-pa! Thaahahahat's it!"
"Yeah.....that dog weighs like eight pounds. Hehehe, don't think you're getting away from me just yet, bub," Logan snickered as he dragged Wade closer and plunged his fingers into his armpits, earning another shriek as the merc futilely clamped his arms down and thrashed even harder.
"Looohohohogaaan staaahahahahahahap! I'm-I'm sohohohohoh glahahad to seeheehee-ahahahahhah-see yohohou ehehehembrace thihihis sss-sihihide of you buhuhuhut-AAAAHH! FUHUHUHUCK!!"
A loud ripping sound was heard as Logan looked up in wonderment to see Wade with a hand gripped to his now bald head as Dogpool stood there with his whole hair piece in her mouth.
Logan couldn't help it. The sight of Wade laying there with those fucking staples sticking out of his head and the dog now gnawing on his toupee like a chew toy was just too comical.
He started to laugh. Really laugh. Laughing too damn hard to keep tickling Wade as he literally fell over, holding his sides while his whole body shook in uncontrollable guffaws.
Wade was finally able to sit up as he glared at his hysterical friend, but he had a smile on his face too.
"Really?! That's what makes you laugh?! You seeing me getting hurt is funny to you? Pretty fucked up, you sado," he pretended to sound annoyed, but really he was anything but. It was rare to see Logan laugh like this besides when Wade was tickling him half to death so he'd let him have this for the moment.
Still he had to strike back somehow for this indignity.
"Puppins attack! Kill, my little munchkin! Kill!" Wade shouted as the dog rushed towards the fallen man and jumped onto him. But Dogpool didn't have a mean bone in her body and only knew how to attack with love as she affectionately licked Logan's face much to his aversion.
"Blech! Wahahade! Gehet your dohohog!" He bellowed as he continued to laugh, but other than trying to shield his face with his arms he didn't do much to stop her.
"Okay okay, come here, sweetie pie. Lets get you away from the bad man who tried to kill your pa-pa," Wade reached over and pulled her off of him, setting her into his lap.
Logan finally fought down the giggles as he sat up to find Wade staring longingly at the destroyed toupee in his hand. He kind of felt bad for the guy and thought he should offer some words of encouragement.
"Yeah, that thing's fucked. Big time. But hey, I think you look better without it," he nodded, using his shirt to wipe off his face as Wade gave him a genuine smile.
"You're only saying that because you're drunk," the merc teased back as Logan shrugged in response and grinned broadly.
"You're probably right. I wouldn't touch ya with a ten foot pole."
"That's okay. I don't mind doing all the touching...," Wade gave him a quick squeeze on the side as Logan snorted and lurched away from his reach and got to his feet.
"Don't fucking start that again. I'd say we're even now. Besides, you don't wanna fuck with me now that I know how damn ticklish you are. It's a stalemate. We can put this all behind us and move on. Now if ya don't mind I'd like to get some sleep," he waved the other man away as he grabbed some blankets off the back of the couch to set up his sleeping area.
Wade just smirked as he began walking out of the room with Dogpool in his arms.
"Silly silly Wolvie. I'm not sure you realize the implications of your actions. But I'm afraid this is far from over. You, my friend, have just started a war."
Logan's face fell as he only stared back at Wade in wide-eyed silence.
"Nighty night, Peanut. Sweet dreams," Wade smirked devilishly, waving with wiggling fingers as he flicked off the light switch on the wall.
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fluffi-dragon · 1 year ago
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hi everyone i hope you dont mind if i
(hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws)
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fluffi-dragon · 2 years ago
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[ johnny cage - mortal kombat ]
yeah..... i have nothing to say
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fluffi-dragon · 2 years ago
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fluffi-dragon · 2 years ago
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I wanna get back into writing but I’ve barely ever posted it anywhere. I want to try and write more but idk who to write with if anyone wants to send prompts you can I might just take a few and I think I have a fandom list at the top of my page.
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fluffi-dragon · 2 years ago
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Is it okay if I can request a fat version of Diluc from Genshin? He just seems like he'd have a dad bod kind of body type and I wish the genshin models had more diverse body types for playable characters.
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i'm such a dad bod diluc truther i gotchu
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fluffi-dragon · 2 years ago
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😭☺️
Full render Halfbody commission with animation for @eliankrios ❤️🐝❤️
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fluffi-dragon · 2 years ago
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Can i request tickled spot from atsv? 🥺
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:3c
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fluffi-dragon · 2 years ago
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NO CAUSE SAME I HATE HIS GUTS SO MUCH/hj
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OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MY GOD I NEED TO TICKLE HIM
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fluffi-dragon · 2 years ago
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HELLOOO
Just a lil ask HRUUUU?
btw..
LEE MILES PLZ 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 (from spiderverse ofc 😡)
(even a lil doodle of him,laughing,and getting tickled is enough for me. I aint sadly as talented as you.i just wanna see him in your artstyle while hes tickled eheeeee (well idkdkdkdkd))
HAVE A GOOD DAY/NIGHT
MWAH! (≧∇≦)
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cutie patootie incoming
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fluffi-dragon · 2 years ago
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commission for @kissycupid !!! THANK U SO MUCH <3
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fluffi-dragon · 2 years ago
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still just a joke to you, but now a slightly funnier one
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