foster-the-world

[foster-the-world]

Baby boy's Biological dad came to 2.5 visits during his first few months of live. When he was about 2.5 he reached out while he was in a rehab place. We took baby boy to see him. Which was nice. In general baby boys a huggy kid that likes people. Got some cute pictures. The communication lasted about a month. Then he checked himself out and we stopped hearing from him.

Last week, on baby boys first day of Kindergarten, he called during the day from a prison. Baby boy's pretty nonchalant about all of this stuff. He's immature for his age and still only five. So he's like "fine, whatever. I've got two Dads." I was slightly nervous about putting this on him during a time we had worked really hard to make as stressless as possible due to a new school being generally stressful for him. Baby boy does not do well with stress and I really want to avoid resulting "behaviors."

Anyway, I didn't want him to miss a chance to talk to his dad so said to call at night. He called that night. Baby boy talked some but generally I led the conversation. Baby boys fully conversational for a five year old but he's a five year old. He also is used to video calls so talking into a phone didn't interest him much. He answered questions and asked his Dad what his favorite animal was but also left the room a few times. Anyway, he seemed fine with it. No resulting stress on his end whatsoever. Now his Dad has called every night. I missed the call two of the nights. Then baby boy was at the Zoo when he called on Saturday. I'm happy to facilitate calls but not every night. For both time constraint reasons and also because its not good for baby boy to get used to daily calls if they are going to stop. He said he's in prison until December. Will see what happens. I was able to email some photos. Pretty shitty the prison system makes you pay. Its not much and of course I don't mind paying but generally shitty for people who can't afford to pay.

Baby boys remains unbothered either way. He said he's happy to talk to him again but generally didn't seem to care much. Time will tell what older baby boy will think about it all.

Not sure what my responsibility is or if I should feel guilty for not doing daily phone calls. If it keeps up I'll set times each week. There are weeknights that are better than others.

[foster-the-world]

Okay, Boss

Recently when I tell baby boy to do something (or more likely stop doing something) he responds with “Okay, Boss.” It cracks me up everytime.

He does not mean he actually listens but at least I’m laughing.

[foster-the-world]

Leanne

While my mom spent a month with us my 2x8yo's watched the show Leanne with her. It's a netflix show about a 50yo women going through a divorce. They loved it! Loved. Bee says her 10th Birthday party theme is going to be Leanne! HA! HA! Not sure how that would happen but might as well be unique, I guess.

[foster-the-world]

Probably not a good sign.

Asked my two 8yo to get the sheets off their bed so I could wash them. Both of them were so confused. “Why would we wash their sheets??” Probably a sign we should wash their sheets more often. In our defense my husband does most of the wash on his work from home days.

[foster-the-world]

[foster-the-world]

Mr Poopy head

Tried some role playing to get baby boy ready for his first day of Kindergarten.

Me - Hi, XX I'm your new teacher. How are you?

Baby boy - Hi, Mr Poopy Head.

Next try:

Me - Hi, XX I'm your new teacher. What did you do this summer?

Baby boy - I slept with my Mommy.

I don't even know what he's talking about. He sleeps in his own toddler bed that I can't fit in - so we don't even do story time in there.

Luckily, he did much better in person. Even sat pretty quietly through a twenty minute adult speech. Was a little feral at the end but nothing too bad.

Tmrws the first full day. I think he'll be fine. Worried about the bus but we are going to take him and pick him up tmrw.

[foster-the-world]

i feel totally normal about this and the scope of my desire is completely average

[foster-the-world]

Cool thing

A cool thing about my kid is that he accepts everybody just how they are. Daycare has a nonspeaking kid with autism. He hums all of the time. Baby boy will often talk about him "XX's my friend. XX says hhhhhmmmmm." The daycare workers said baby boy is the only kid to play with him regularly. He's def of the "I'm going to do whatever the Hell I want so you should also" type.

My girls at five years old would have been perfectly nice but they wouldn't accept him in the same way.

I'm not sure what disabilities the other kids in baby boys class will have. I'm confident baby boy will make some unintentionally rude comments but I'm also sure he will be friends with everyone.

We asked him what he wanted us to tell his teacher:

-I'm so so happy.

-I'm a garderner

-I'm fast like a cheetah

His sisters said to tell them "he has a lot of energy."

[foster-the-world]

Another day another great $16.32 haul from Eataly. Rebels going to look very fancy with her high end salad at art camp. Off to the corner is a big lasagna tray.

[foster-the-world]

Sorry another great bit (that I read in the NYT's review):

She is semi-amicably ending her second marriage and receives a text from her soon-to-be-ex-husband that reads, “I need you.” When she texts back asking if he’s O.K., he replies: “Sorry, pushed send too soon. I need you to sign the divorce papers.”

All my Puny Sorrows

I'm reading the "All my Puny Sorrows." What a perfect name for a book and for all of your troubles - regardless of how large they are. I'm only three pages in and can already tell its going to be very good.

I just finished "The Correspondent." Also, lovely. Highly recommend. Some really strong lines.

[foster-the-world]

The author describes the sisters as "enemies who love each other." Seems apt. As a kid I wanted a sister so badly. I cried when my little brother was born and they told me he was a boy. When they took me to the hospital to see him my mom whispered to my day "does she seem okay now that she's seen him." My dad whispered back yes. I very clearly remember thinking I was most decidedly not fine. I wanted a sister.

All my Puny Sorrows

I'm reading the "All my Puny Sorrows." What a perfect name for a book and for all of your troubles - regardless of how large they are. I'm only three pages in and can already tell its going to be very good.

I just finished "The Correspondent." Also, lovely. Highly recommend. Some really strong lines.

[foster-the-world]

All my Puny Sorrows

I'm reading the "All my Puny Sorrows." What a perfect name for a book and for all of your troubles - regardless of how large they are. I'm only three pages in and can already tell its going to be very good.

I just finished "The Correspondent." Also, lovely. Highly recommend. Some really strong lines.

[foster-the-world]

Saw and enjoyed

We are taking advantage of my mom being in town to get out of the house without paying a babysitter.

So far we've seen both Weapons and Relay. Both good. Both not things I would normally take the time to see but I'm glad I did. Weapons had the whole theater cracking. I think it was supposed to be a comedy horror movie. There is also some chance it was not supposed to be funny but one person laughed so we all did. I wish it was the later but I think its the former.

Thursday we have parent teacher conferences with baby boys two kindergarten teachers. Then I am meeting up with a current parent whose son will be in his class. Then we are going to try to get in at a restaurant where its impossible to get reservations. They release a month in advance but the bots buy them all up. We tried this weekend but a Saturday night was not happening. So we will get there early on Thursday and hopefully have a better chance. Not a big deal if we don't get in. Its not far from our house and a million other good restaurants nearby.

[foster-the-world]

Why?

Why do all the sorority rush girls look like very pretty (albeit generically so) 35yos?

[foster-the-world]

Audio Processing Disorder?

Bee's teacher seemed to hint at an ADHD diagnosis this past year. This is the first year teachers have said anything but some of it made sense to us. Nothing compared to baby boy but obviously that doesn't mean we should ignore it. In response we got lucky with a free spot in a well regarded place that does full nueropsych assessments. Its part of some research project. They won't testify if you have to sue for private placement but she is no where near that level so it didn't matter.

Results showed academically she's doing well (80-90%ish). They didn't see ADHD. They did say she scored well below average on a audio processing exam. Which could track with some things we see. Not exactly sure how you solve for that problem.

Talked with the school social worker. She said once school starts she'll get her scheduled for a school based speech language exam. Assuming she scores the same we will get her speech at school. Hopefully that person will give us some help with what could help her at home. I'd also try to get her in the ICT class for 5th grade. Probably not worth moving her this year. She's a strong student because we provide a lot of support at home but I think having two teachers would be great for her. We will see what they say.

Anyway, it doesn't feel very stressful. We will figure it out and she's totally fine anyway.

[foster-the-world]

$16.32 from Eataly via the to good to go app. Especially excited about the fresh pasta and the fancy olive oil.

[foster-the-world]

Wonderful

The trip to the Amazon in Peru with my mom

and the girls was wonderful. We especially loved staying at a treehouse lodge. We held a sloth, fed wild monkeys, petted a caiman, saw at least 50 pink and grey dolphins and saw so many birds. Unforgettable.

My husband and baby boy did well at home. I think all the one on one time he’s gotten this summer has been great for him.

Flew back in just in time for his prek graduation. He refused to get on the stage but clapped loudly from my lap. I’m happy if he’s happy. Everyone tells us he’s ready for kindergarten. Feeling strong about it but time will tell.

Husband got a unofficial job offer while we were on vacation. Vacation job offers are a theme for us. He wasn’t looking and neither of us wants more work. But he’ll probably take it as we both want more money. He’s pension is based off his last three years avg salary so it’s smart to keep moving up. He has 12 years until he can retire at 55yo.

Put him in charge of school supplies as there’s no reason I should be in charge every year. Got baby boys uniforms. $400!!! - but that’s for winter and summer. We don’t have to pay for anything else as meals, computers, afterschool, field trips, school supplies are all included. So can’t complain.

My mom and Aunt are here watching the kids. Turns out being a parent is pretty easy if you have 24/7 free childcare and someone does the laundry, cleans the house and cooks the food. We went to see weapons last night. A comedy/horror movie. Or at least everyone in our theater was laughing. Odd but worth seeing if you like that kind of thing.

This morning I commuted over an hour to a patient who called me five minutes before to cancel. The mother then called me an asshole who can’t understand English. Great. Great. Ole well. I’m still getting paid the same. I will ask them to change this patient to another nurse. I prefer not to be home alone with someone who curses at me when they make a mistake. I don’t get paid enough for that.