foulranchhumanoidpeanut - Tumblr blog

[foulranchhumanoidpeanut]

Grief is the ghost of love...

"Most times, a ghost is a wish."

""I loved you completely, and you loved me the same," she said, "that's all." And this was the point I wanted the most to make. That at the end of our life, if we can say this about each other, the rest doesn't matter. It’s the love that stays."

“I'm in the hallway again, I'm in the hallway. The radio's playing my favorite song. Leave the lights on. Keep talking. I'll keep walking toward the sound of your voice."

"you can’t take loved away. time and death and mistakes take people from you, but nothing and no one can take back that love... everything changes irreversibly with every second that passes, but nothing and no one can change the fact that i was loved and i loved back... you can’t take it away from me. i was loved. i was loved."

"At the root of every ghost, a yearning. A tug, in which a living person reaches so fervently toward something absent, that the absence becomes bodied. As anyone who has known loss understands full well, lack is not in fact, an absence at all. It is a presence. A person we love dies, or leaves, or changes, and a gap forms. It takes on their shape. Mimics their movement. Echoes their voice like a mockingbird. We feel this gap take up space, filling every place our lost one once was, and now isn’t. It reflects in mirrors. Flickers in candle flames. A phantom."

The Amazing Devil, Inkpot Gods//Jamie Anderson//Haunting of Hill House//twitter user @tothedeaths//Lang Leav, Memories//@boymartyr//Mike Flanagan//Xie Lei, Blow//Valeria Luiselli, Faces in the Crowd (tr. Christina MacSweeney)//Haunting of Hill House//Richard Silken, You Are Jeff//Henri Nouwen//Spiritfarer//@boymiffy & @petrichara//Amanda Lovelace, to drink coffee with a ghost//Max LL, What You Leave Behind//@nickyandmikey//The Newton Brothers//@wifegideonnav//Shannon Barry//GennaRose Nethercott, “A Ghost Is a Memory.” On Bodies, Belief, and the Places Ghost Stories Live

[foulranchhumanoidpeanut]

Girls are so in touch with all the beautiful things in this world. I learn so much from women.. I think art and beautiful things manifest themselves just for women

[foulranchhumanoidpeanut]

To love something is to be afraid

The Last of Us (s01e03) // A Little Life (Hanya Yanigahara) // The Hunger Games (dir. Gary Ross) // War of the Foxes (Richard Siken) // Edmund gets Stabbed - Narnia (dir. Andrew Addamson) // Emily Dickinson // Death in the Sickroom (Edvard Munch) // Fleabag (Created by Phoebe Waller Bridge) // SKAM (Created by Julie Andem)

[foulranchhumanoidpeanut]

twilight

[foulranchhumanoidpeanut]

the healing power of tea and toast

rhian ellis, noah verrier, harry styles, hanya yanagihara, mary maxam, cavetown, linda smith

[foulranchhumanoidpeanut]

~ Bianca Sparacino, "The Strength In Our Scars"

[foulranchhumanoidpeanut]

how do you just get up and deal with the fact that there’s a last time for everything. there was a last time you sat on your dads shoulders and there was a last time your mom tucked you into bed. there’s going to be a last time you kiss your sister on the head and there’s going to be a last time you hug your best friend. there’s going to be a last time you feel exactly as you feel right now and there’s going to be a last time that person says i love you. i need to lay down

[foulranchhumanoidpeanut]

“you’re so pretty,” okay write poetry about me then.

[foulranchhumanoidpeanut]

sometimes the only thing that motivates me to do math is thinking that maybe Jude St Francis would be a little proud of me for it

[foulranchhumanoidpeanut]

Todd, struggling to flirt with Neil: So…you come here often?

Neil: This is our dorm room

[foulranchhumanoidpeanut]

"OH, SLEEP. Nothing else could ever bring me such pleasure, such freedom, the power to feel and move and think and imagine, safe from the miseries of my waking consciousness. I was not a narcoleptic—I never fell asleep when I didn’t want to. I was more of a somniac. A somnophile. I’d always loved sleeping."

~ Ottessa Moshfegh (My Year Of Rest And Relaxation)

[foulranchhumanoidpeanut]

What is life, other than moments? What is laughter, other than a small victory over sorrow? A single moment, just one, when everything inside us isn't broken.

-Fredrik Backman, The Winners

[foulranchhumanoidpeanut]

If you love home—and even if you don't—there is nothing quite as cozy, as comfortable, as delightful, as that first week back. That week, even the things that would irritate you—the alarm waahing from some car at three in the morning; the pigeons who come to clutter and cluck on the windowsill behind your bed when you’re trying to sleep in—seem instead reminders of your own permanence, of how life, your life, will always graciously allow you to step back inside of it, no matter how far you have gone away from it or how long you have left it.

A Little Life by Hanya Yanagihara

Part V: The Happy Years. Chapter 2, pg. 515 

[foulranchhumanoidpeanut]

If you love home—and even if you don't—there is nothing quite as cozy, as comfortable, as delightful, as that first week back. That week, even the things that would irritate you—the alarm waahing from some car at three in the morning; the pigeons who come to clutter and cluck on the windowsill behind your bed when you’re trying to sleep in—seem instead reminders of your own permanence, of how life, your life, will always graciously allow you to step back inside of it, no matter how far you have gone away from it or how long you have left it.

A Little Life by Hanya Yanagihara

Part V: The Happy Years. Chapter 2, pg. 515 

[foulranchhumanoidpeanut]

TW: Brief description of cutting. But there was the Jude he knew in the daylight, and even in the dusk and dawn, and then there was the Jude who possessed his friend for a few hours each night, and that Jude, he sometimes feared, was the real Jude: the one who haunted their apartment alone, the one whom he had watched draw the razor so slowly down his arm, his eyes wide with agony, the one whom he could never reach, no matter how many reassurances he made, no matter how many threats he levied. It sometimes seemed as if it was that Jude who truly directed their relationship, and when he was present, no one, not even Willem, could dispel him. And still, he remained stubborn: he would banish him, through the intensity and the force and the determination of his love. He knew this was childish, but all stubborn acts are childish acts. Here, stubbornness was his only weapon. Patience; stubbornness; love: he had to believe these would be enough. He had to believe that they would be stronger than any habit of Jude’s, no matter how long or diligently practiced.

A Little Life by Hanya Yanagihara

Part V: The Happy Years. Chapter 2, pg. 520

[foulranchhumanoidpeanut]

There should be a separate category called 'women written by Backman'

[foulranchhumanoidpeanut]

Sometimes I’m just suddenly hit with this overwhelming feeling of homesickness for autumn