fragalis - Tumblr blog

[fragalis]

❥ big brother!

         FEATURES SETTLE INTO a quiet expression of pity. Woe, poor girl. She draws upon the proclivities of a child clinging, just summers old. Too raw, too delicate — he wonders what age she borders on, surely she just taunts the cusp of adulthood. Yet, her features betray that ; wrought by innocence gentle and sweet, broken by the wrath of a past life and born anew, bruised and unable to wade through reality like a lamb tender. Matteo belies her ignorance — to others he’d been the viper. Lone and vicious with fangs bloodied and bared, ever the coldest of souls by consequence of his occupation. She’d caused him to unwind from that aloofness and silver tongue to a more docile façade ( dare he deem it acceptable ).

         ❛   Of course.  ❜  

         Compassion reins the need to downplay the significance of his generosity. He’d claim it was a small gesture, something lacking much effort. But in the eyes of another, rescued, torn from the embrace of death, such kindness satiates the soul far more than any amount of Gil could grant. What he considers minute had been the seed of bountiful gratitude, nestled within her heart to flourish and mould to the route she’d opted to pursue. That was no small gift.

         Now he’d retreated, pulling his hand back to retrieve paper and a quill.

          ❛   Until you’re able to speak again, you can write. I’m sure that’s a lot easier than searching through a book and pointing, don’t y’think ?  ❜ They’re offered to her, slid atop the table, ❛   You can write your thoughts out, too. If you find it therapeutic. Whatever you need for now I can get, assuming Anjou doesn’t do so first.   ❜

         fingers hold the quill to the paper. but nothing appears other than black ink dots from keeping the quill lingering on the paper too long. her thoughts were far too messy to express. but at the same time, it was far too empty. overwhelmed, she’s very overwhelmed. his kindness was a lot to process. while he said it, that Anjou was his sister, she wonders just who she is. she didn’t seem scary, but there was this lingering feeling of anxiety over meeting another stranger. had she not remembered him from the night before, she’d assume he was one of them. 

         for now, the quill is let go, and the paper left blank. now more awake, she examines herself some more. noting her fatigue, her bruises, and the bandage on her leg. brows furrow, she reaches to touch it. attempting to remember what happened, she can see the blood stain, it shaped almost like a slit. fingers trace over it, and it triggers something. suddenly in a flash she remembered. the arrow piercing into he leg, knocking her over as she cried out. a hand comes up to her chest, she flinches backwards. an distressed gasp leaves her lips. that pain shot itself through her leg once more as a reminder. one hand clung to that wound, and her eyes close.

         her body was shaking, and her eyes open with tears now within them. he would likely think it was the pain, but it was just the memory. it was a curse to only remember the trauma, and to continue only remembering that trauma was hard. but luckily a distraction finds it’s way into her mind. when her hand had made its way to her chest, it clung to something - a chain. it was broken and stained. what was once a silver metal, was now accented with red. and the charm was split in half. it looked to be if someone were to push the two pieces together.. it’d spell something.

         so, she pushes them together slowly. almost afraid she’d break it. she looks to him, confused once she reads what it says. tugging at it, as if to show him. it had said:

                                   ❛ to Nimue, my dear sister. I love you. ❜

[fragalis]

@hiraesi​

         ❛ he told you? ❜

         it was only a trip to the markets. a simple favor. he’d ask her to try. to venture somewhere safe and a short distance away all on her own. at her age? it should have been no problem. but it was when she saw the crowd, heard the noises, and was approached by strangers.. she cowered. since that day, she’d been adamant to stay in the safety of inside. never venturing past the yard. there was disappointment in herself, and the fear she’d disappointed not only him, but everyone else, too. she’s been off since that day. it was no surprise that he called in reinforcements. she trusted a small amount of people, but Mana was one of them. she sighs.

         ❛ i’m fine.. promise! ❜ and a flash of a weak smile. believable, right?

[fragalis]

@ehnmi​

         her entrance is noted by the sound of tiny feet against the floor. she toddles her way into his office, dragging a bag of coloring supplies behind her. it was that time of day, where she’d done all she could do without being at his side - napping, playing, eating - and while that was only a few hours of her day, she couldn’t go that long without attention. specifically, his. in a way, this was his message to alert him he’d been in there too long. so, she approaches his side, pout forming on her lips, and her arms go up.  ❛ big.. big brother? can I color with you? I promise i’ll be good! gooder than I was yesterday! ❜  

[fragalis]

❥ BIG BROTHER!

          PAPERWORK, BOOKKEEPING, other tedious administration — he occupies himself with the most menial of tasks, knowing his presence would grant the girl comfort whilst she recuperated. It’s but a small sacrifice ; he’d willingly bear hours of repetition, white noise did little to make this mock penance more palpable. Call it a familial obligation, akin to a motherly hen — he merely dons the guise. It’s the gentle patter of feet which comes first, which he is quick to recognize — Nimue. He’d offer a double take once his charge had arrived. She’d been the last person he’d expect to wander, let alone be on her feet. He’s hesitant, reserved in his need to celebrate. She’s all cheers ; free of duress, cheeks alight, soft rose teeming. It’s the warmth of life, counteracting waxen pallor and its drear, soothing her crippling malaise. Cast out is the touch of death and all its ghastly maquillage. She’d convalesced so brief. Odd. A hum rolls, never-ending. Matteo’s skepticism runs deep in its undeniable intensity. 

          ❛   Hn …   ❜

          Had he not known better, he may have considered it a bout of delirium. The culmination of a dozen sleepless nights finally chose its dawn, dropping its might upon his head. He’d allowed a blink or two, deliberate and weighted to refresh his vision, and still she stands with vitality and blushing cheeks ( innocuous and bubbly as before ). Ghostly sheets sweeping ceramic floors, and foul demeanour, they were all so much easier to believe. He should be happy — that optimism is arresting, infectiously pure. Warranted. He knows better than to cling to something so fleeting. He knows better. 

          Stalling himself any longer would stifle the mood, sour her celebration. She felt better, her illness allowed her a taste of normalcy ( which he deems a farce. How cruel ; the virulent demons lie in wait  ). He’d risen from his chair to approach, brought a hand up to dishevel her locks with fingers, allowing them to cascade in a flaxen mess. Somehow he feels guilt boring its pins, prodding and peppering his throat, futility swallowing the imaginary lump to quell its sting. He contributes to that false sense of hope, a half truth he’d permit himself to indulge — if anything it was for her sake. Hardened poker faces fared better elsewhere, not within these walls. Not within her presence. 

          ❛   I’m glad to hear that, but I still want you to take it easy, alright?   ❜   His voice had softened then, reattempting that question, hoping to gain some insight. ❛   I asked you before, about that man, where exactly did you meet him? What did he look like? I don’t expect you to remember everything, but even a vague description is enough. Something about this isn’t sitting properly with me.   ❜

         ❛ I don’t want to take it easy. I want to go see my flowers. ❜ involuntarily, his hand is grabbed. an innocent smile is flashed in his direction before she turns to the stairs. going up was hardly a struggle. she still felt as if she were on air. she practically flies past a confused Kazutame, out the door and outside. while she’d been cooped up for a couple days, they felt so much longer. she worried about her flowers, imagining that they might be wilted before she could continue her soft little encouragements to help continue their growth. the thought upset her so much, that she begged both kazutame and anjou to let her outside. just for a few moments. her tiny garden, it was so important to her. 

         the air outside was cool. there was a delicate crisp to the air. when both feet land outside, her eyes close while she takes a deep breath. how she missed this. the time of day where the sun was yet to be at its peak, when everything was just beginning to wake up, when the morning mildew kept the grass nice and wet. ( did she mention she was far too excited to bother putting on shoes? ) while it were only days she spent bedridden, it was enough seclusion to make anyone miss the simple things. Head is turned back to Matteo, letting out laughter as she squeezes his hand.  ❛ it’s so nice outside, big brother! ❜ the grin on her face was so wide and so relieved. and her flowers?

alive.

         all of her lilies, they were still bright pink and in bloom. Matteo’s dragged along with her closer to the garden, and she’s humming now. she gasps, looking to him with beaming pride.  ❛ look! there’s even honeybees in my garden! ❜ pluck one, two, three baby weeds, and she was all done. brows furrow for just a second, before realizing that Anjou had tended to her garden in her absence. ( only Anjou knew just the right things to say to her flowers, after all. )  ❛ i’m so happy! ❜ hands clap underneath her chin, and she giggles. 

         with boundless energy, nimue bounces right back up, turning on her heels, eyes focused. her watering can laid on the side of the outside wall, she’s practically skipping to fetch it.  ❛ still so so pretty! ❜  

         it was odd, but she was so jittery. for some reason, she felt anxious. her heart was racing, and while she stood in place to water her flowers, she was almost bouncing. something wasn’t quite right, but she assumed it was all the pent up energy from laying down for days.  

oh right, Matteo’s question. she almost forgot.

          ❛ the baker looked like me! he had the same colored scales. ❜ and then she stops watering, to turn and point, just to outside the yard.  ❛ I met him right there. he was giving samples of his cakes to sell in the markets. ❜ suddenly, a pout appears on her lips.  ❛ I asked him if he knew me by any chance, but he said no. I think he felt bad so he gave me a free piece of cake. it was really good! ❜ and she’s smiling again.  ❛ I promised him we’d go see him at the markets! we have to go soon big brother, okay? ❜

[fragalis]

︱▶ ANJOU OLANI.

                                                                                   ★ ★ ★

          THE MORROW BREAKS, skies warm to pastels melting to gold as the sun begins to creep, the horizon yielding in its wake. The weather, however, is not so idyllic — despite the coo of birds nestled in their shelters, the patter of rainfall drowns their songs ears with its own sombre melody. Droplets pop light yet constant to the windowpane, and Anjou stirs as she begins to rouse. The quiet protest of disrupted sleep rises from her throat in the sound of a broken hum. Naturally, she’d attempted to extend her arms, finding their flourish interrupted by the form of another. Still laden with the aftereffects of sleep, moments pass before she recalls Kazutame had stayed the night. Lips part, eyes part slowly, relishing it all. The comforting warmth of another was so foreign to her, so unlikely. Swathed in both cotton and the arms of another, a lover. She breathes, shutting her eyes once more. Menphina bestows her this sweet taboo. Consciousness fully awakens ; sense follows suit. His skin, bare and vulnerable, encompasses her with his warmth. But it’s the steady beat of his heart which truly grounds her to the experience. Even in sleep does he retain that approachable air. Nothing to hide, all laid to bear. 

          He was so readable. She was not. But, he’d unearthed a chapter of hers, did he not?

          Anjou shifts upward, elevated enough to observe his features. What peek of light filters through the drapes guides the fingers tracing his cheekbone, their touch feather soft as they brush away what strands obscure his sleeping face. Down, downward she traces. And there, she stops at the bow of his lip. There was hope yet for her to open up, to confide. She pulls away, breath slipping through a sigh.

          One day she’d find the confidence to shed her pain, unburden herself, allow herself to heal. In that moment of reticence, she’s fighting with that sense of abandonment again. Rekindled from childhood, raw and monumental. She’s that little girl again, fearful and undervalued. She recalls a father ( a viper ) constantly proving his love to his children, unconditionally. How he flaunted it, so fake and mawkish. And yet, still, he had left. Even with those weighted words of wisdom, promises of protection. He had left. And now lays next to her, a man speaking of love. Oh, how she fears her past manifesting again. Perchance she is a fool for investing so much into this, perchance she is a fool for expecting different. This is too sweet a delusion.

          But, was it really? 

          Kazutame — He is of devotion, of authenticity. She’d grown to detect falsehoods, trained to cut through the untruths of pigs. Through the subtlest twitch of a brow could a lie be undone, the hitch of a breath, a wandering eye. He’d shown none of these. And her? She was the perfect spy — dolled up and deceptive. She was a scout — secretive, a dazzle to the eye, a mystery to all at the opposite end of her blade. Professionally, it was how everyone knew her to be. Few were privy to anything else.

        But —

          With Kazutame, she simply is Anjou. Her true self. Affectionate. Contemplative. Kind.

          More raindrops. Its song chills her despite the sheets ( and walking heater at her side ), so she curls into him, rests her head beneath his chin to nuzzle his throat. Arms wrap around his bicep, drawing his embrace just a bit closer. She knows they have errands to run, knows the earlier they raise the better, but few things were more appealing than simply lazing around. The simplest things were the most rewarding. With this step forward, she realizes it would be far more difficult now to stand being apart. The masculine, yet subtle comforting scent still clung to a shirt far too large, and it would hold much more meaning to her than a goodbye now. It held promise, reminded her to continue to count the days for the next time he would visit. 

          Gently do her nails run along his scales. Gently does her tail sweep along his leg —both are gestures in an effort to wake him. For once, that silence was burdened by an air of loneliness. A loneliness she fancied no attachment to. She wonders if he knows of her inner turmoil, of her doubt. Last night was a minor admission, just barely uncovering the breadth of her pain. But, some part urges her not to be jaded, to open up, allow that hope to fill her heart one. last. time. 

          Kazutame was different. 

         there was something different about this morning. he felt rested, for one. such a rarity that was. no matter how long he had been working in the mines, his body always ached. his bed was not soft, nor was it accepting to his tall frame. his nights were restless, with maybe a secured two hours of sleep. in the mines, when he stayed inside overnight, he got maybe... just maybe thirty minutes. a dangerous way to go about the mines, especially with the gases, the traps, the threat of collapse. kazutame had no care, the mines were his distraction. in reality if something were to happen to him, his mother would still be fine, probably better without his burdens. he had no reason to go into the mines with caution.

         but now? he has a reason to take care of himself. His head turns to look at her, but he was yet to open his eyes. he’s basking in her touch, releasing a sigh. he listens to the rain, wrapping his arms around her to give her more warmth. it was silly, but he has an image. their lazy Sundays in bed.. while today wasn’t a Sunday, he could pretend. he wants those Sundays with her, if it were not for the threat of errands.. he’d lay here with her all day. he’s never wanted to be so lazy in his life.

         ❛ if only I could wake up to you every morning.. i’d be one very happy guy. ❜ but he won’t dwell on leaving right now, not with his extra few days. these were reserved for her and her alone. ❛ good morning. ❜ his eyes open, and his smile is soft. he leans down to press a kiss to her forehead. ❛ I love you. ❜ he wouldn’t miss a chance to say that first thing in the morning.

         but there was something wrong. he could feel it in her breathing. they were supposed to be relaxing, enjoying each other’s presence. something was stirring her up inside, and he won’t let it stay that way. she could be stubborn, but so could he.

          ❛ okay. ❜ he’s sitting up now, pulling her up along with him. his hold is still firm and comforting. ❛ I can feel that something’s upsetting you.. and you don’t have to tell me, but... ❜ he kisses her head again, gently guiding her to look up at him. Hands cup her face, caressing her cheeks with his thumbs. ❛ it’ll be hard to enjoy this.. extra week with you if I know you’re upset. ❜

         He grins, anticipating her reaction. before now, they both assumed he only had a day with her before he was to return home. ❛ I called my mother.. and told her I needed a few more days here. I told her there was a certain gem that was keeping me here. ❜ he winks. ❛ a very.. very rare and beautiful gem. so.. now, for the next seven days, it’s me and you. ❜

[fragalis]

I was suddenly left with nothing in my hands but a handful of crazy stars.

Jack Kerouac, On the Road (via books-n-quotes)

[fragalis]

The advantage of a bad memory is that one enjoys several times the same good things for the first time.

Friedrich Nietzsche (via philosophyquotes)

[fragalis]

❥ BIG BROTHER!

         RAISING HIS FREE HAND, fingers ruffle his own locks. Frustration strikes ; he’s shutting his eyes before kneading the bridge of his nose. All he can offer is a sigh, mildly relieved to see her surrender to sleep, yet irritated at his lack of insight. Footsteps fall soft yet purposeful, and Matteo had responded somatically, with ears trained in their direction, more attentive than he’d been consciously. Despite the instinctual reaction, he’d remained unmoving as he mulled over his own speculations, only partially mindful of presence to join him. 

Kazutame — he’d taken it upon himself to be of some measure of help. Perhaps it was his loyalty, his innate altruism spurring him on. Naught served as a fetter nor prompted him to prove his worth, though he credits the Xaela’s devotion to Anjou. When paired with palpable compassion, it was impossible to deter him from a cause, and aid in any form wasn’t something Matteo discouraged. Kazutame scoured the ends of the world, quite literally, and in that quiet consideration does the younger male thank him for fulfilling much of the labour he would have undertaken himself. 

He’d drawn a breath then, giving the Xaela the briefest of glances ( an acknowledgment ) before returning his attention to his charge. Still writhing, still gripped by pain, she clings to him. Akin to a child, frail, tender, his regard reflected the careful tending of a protector. She’s repositioned against his arm, made more comfortable by ensuring her head rests atop the fabric of his attire rather than his armour. His voice, however, reflected venom, roused by ire belied by cold seriousness.  

          ❛   Stress works in mysterious ways. I wouldn’t be surprised if her separation anxiety’s what amplified her symptoms. Still, what concerns me the most is these pain episodes. I’d rather not assume the worst, but this is too similar to dirty tricks I’ve seen. It’s not unheard of for rivals to slip a toxin into someone’s food or drink. That baker better hope this is just a bad bout with an infection, or I’ll become his worst nightmare.    ❜

Nimue is properly gathered in his arms as he raises to his full height, eyeing the futon still unmade across the room. He then faces Kazutame, expression easing for the first time in the hour, enough to deflect the hostility to charge his tone. Matteo’s typical mood had returned, more collected, more appropriate for conversation. There was a time and place for him to channel his upset, now hadn’t been ideal.   

          ❛   Her condition isn’t your responsibility, but I appreciate you coming back to help her. She needs other people that she can trust other than me, especially an Au ra. Nim doesn’t say it, but I know she yearns to belong and be around people who look like her. That’s a big deal to someone who’s lost her sense of self. Small things that Anjou and I consider routine as Miqo’te aren’t things she can relate to. In the long run, it takes a toll. You just being around is important, and I’m sure my sister has told you that.   ❜

      ❛ she’s a great kid. ❜ he was right, she was not his responsibility. however, he paid that no mind. the first mention of her being struck with an unknown illness startled him. if it were something simple, he wouldn’t have been consulted. the fact that it was so important that it was his brain they needed to pick at, he wanted to take no chances. and if what he was saying was true, he hoped his presence brought her some comfort while she waited for Matteo to return ❛ there was no need for Anjou or Yeran to waste time and come to the Steppe. For Nimue, I didn’t mind running to the markets and finding out what I could. I’ve only known her for a little bit of time, but it’s not hard to see why you all love her so much. ❜ he liked that, being important. he thinks back to when he arrived, to Nimue’s weak, but excited ‘ Kazu! ’ it was heartbreaking to hear her voice so broken, and yet she still managed to have that regular light to her voice. it was  like she really hadn’t registered how sick she truly was.

      ❛ Anjou has, I just really never realized it until now. I’d want nothing more than to be that for Nimue. it was strange at first to wrap my head around her memory loss, but after getting to know her I really just want to answer any questions she has. ❜ it was true, Kazutame has gifted her items from the Steppe, and books. he picked up on her love for reading, after all. ❛ whenever she has questions or whatever, i’ll always be ready to answer them. my linkpearl doesn’t work in the mines, but otherwise.. i’m always available. ❜ and that was to put it lightly. 

       ❛ anyway her room’s all good to go. I changed the scent, mother said it helps with pain. I don’t really know if it’s going to work, but she seems to like the smells. they probably remind her of home. I’ll leave to let her get some more rest. ❜ he watches Matteo place her back into her room with a concerned gaze, hoping that now that he was here, she’d wake up perfectly fine.

-

      hours had gone by, soon she’d slept the rest of the day prior. the last thing she remembered was falling asleep against Matteo. this was often, though. most nights she’d stay up late anticipating his return, only to fall asleep minutes after his arrival. she’d wake up in her bedroom, eagerly searching for him in the morning. however, she knew that only a day ago she was hardly able to get up on her own. she’d been bedridden for days. today felt different, though. she felt normal. so slowly, she attempts to pick herself up.

      it was so freeing to stand. in truth, she was not sure if she was dreaming or not. ( something a simple pinch would solve. ) she smiles, eager to walk herself out of her room, which truthfully, after a few days of being stuck in it felt more like a small prison. it felt as if she were walking on air, while she felt better she could tell something was really off. maybe it was just that she’d been a rock for a week straight. 

      upon reaching Matteo’s office, her smile grows greater seeing him in there. ❛ big brother! ❜ even her voice sounded normal. ❛ look big brother! I’m better now! ❜ 

      she was right. he always made everything better.

[fragalis]

︱▶ ANJOU OLANI.

          ❛   Oh, I know. It’s all you’ve been saying all night.   ❜

IT’S A LIGHTHEARTED PROD — she knows his words hold weight, knows what he speaks is of the heart, wholesome and true. Anjou was his contrast in that regard ; she’d never been liberal with compliments, holding her tongue for only the most deserving of moments. Her criteria was lofty, any commend was nurtured for weeks at times, reconsidered and reworked prior to any utterance. But it is all contingent on her standing towards the receiver ; and to gain her favour and unadulterated regard was a feat all on its own. It was another commonality she and her brother shared ( unsurprisingly ), something saved for the ones they loved most, for those they respected most. But that night had been one of those rare moments. And as she’s allowed a moment to collect herself through his affections, she’d begun to glide her fingertips along, lining his jawline. In that reticence, she studies him, gaze soft and loving, before she speaks in a tone almost coy. 

          ❛   … But, I don’t grow tired of hearing it,   ❜ and, at that, she’d pressed her lips to his, deliberate as she savours the moment. It’d been a gesture more passionate than their playfulness prior, bearing more substance to reinforce her words. She knows a part of him is aware she mirrors his affection, despite her modest fervour. Anjou does so through action, through the smallest of touches and kisses and other intimate means. But at times, words are necessary for reassurance, even despite their intangibility. As she retreats, a small, yet loving smile warms her features, eyes alight and tender.

          ❛   I love you, Kazutame.   ❜

But she is just as quick to interrupt, untangling herself from his embrace, placing a finger to his mouth before he’d conjured up another lengthy babble about his devotion. ❛   And as much as I’d love for you to continue to pamper me, a girl’s gotta get her beauty sleep, too. There’s still a lot I want to show you tomorrow, and we can’t do that if we’re dozing the day away for staying up too late, now can we ?   ❜

And through it all, she’d consciously added that sultry flair to her words, giving him one final peck for the night, hoping it’d motivate him to sleep, ❛   Besides, the sooner we finish our errands, the sooner we can get back and have the house to ourselves before you go.   ❜

     ❛  You’re such a tease... ❜

     BUT HE SAYS IT without the playfulness this time, it was more of a whine. he guides her off of his lap, adjusting himself so it was easy for her to curl back up against his chest. he wanted it no other way. there were kisses being placed to the top of her head, he would not surrender to sleep without finishing what he started, first. especially, if she was going to treat him to THAT before she cut him off so rudely. 

      ❛  I could get used to hearing that, too. my name sounds a lot better when you say it. ❜

     HE WAS A LITTLE surprised at how soon she said it in return. it was not unwelcome, not at all. In fact, it left him with this lovestruck-dumb gaze. he’s happy, beyond thrilled. she’d already proven through her acts of intimacy that she loves him, too. but there was something warm about hearing her say it. he hopes he hears it more. it’s the only thing he really wanted to hear at all.  ❛  I love that you love me.  ❜ he laughs, pulling her against him.  ❛ if being alone means there’s more where that kiss came from, you can drag me anywhere. ❜

     HE PRESSES ONE final kiss to the top of her head, before he shuts his eyes. his arms were wrapped around her securely, hands gently brushing her arms.  ❛ it’s going to be so wonderful waking up next to you. I can’t wait for you to be the first thing I see. ❜

     KAZUTAME WAITS FOR AWHILE, waiting for her to drift off into a deep sleep. he had one last thing to do before he could sleep. he did not want to disturb her. he leans over to grab his linkpearl, knowing that it was early morning in the Steppe. his mother would without a doubt be awake, waiting for him to return. he waits for her to pick up, unsure of what she was going to say. he’d create a lie, something that made sense to keep him here. he’d tell her about Anjou later. When she picks up, his voice is quiet, not wanting to wake her. 

      ❛  Hey, mama. I know.. I know I was supposed to be home today, but I won’t be. I need a few more days. There’s still some things I need to take care of, and there’s.. a certain gem that’s keeping me here. ❜ he was looking at Anjou as he said that, and he’s holding her a little tighter, now.  ❛ don’t be mad, mama. I’m fine, I just want to make sure we’re taken care of. I promise I will be home soon. ❜

     WHEN HE FINISHES the call, he gets himself more comfortable. it felt strange to lie to his mother, but he wasn’t ready to leave Anjou’s side. he was always one to choose what his heart wanted, though. he presses a kiss to her head once more, finally allowing himself to drift off to sleep. it was a long night, but he’d never felt so light in his life.

[fragalis]

︱▶ ANJOU OLANI.

          ❛   He doesn’t like when people stick their nose in his business, so I imagine he’d find it hypocritical if he got too curious. His job is to keep secrets, so I’d say he does it well.   ❜

         MATTEO WAS PECULIAR — private, guarded. Concerns were seldom discussed so openly, particularly when it came to the matters of another. Kin or not, he knew his place, knew where his input and guidance was required, and when it was welcome. Anjou — the younger, less enigmatic of the twins — honed herself more to the nuances of others, their mysteries, their selfhood, and that included those of her brother. Where explanations fell short, she would elaborate, clarify, turn riddles to clarity. Elsewhere, her elder counterpart consciously chose to shelter such undertones. She’d been his foil, naturally. And yet, few had reciprocated such regard, obsessing over superficial details, enthralling themselves with beauty or her fixation with spoken strength ( she is brains not brawn ). So, she is blindsided, delightfully so, caught off guard by his genuine tenderness and attention. So careful is he with those ministrations, requesting permission, voiceless ( how unusual of him, so boisterous and bold ) yet equal in boldness with each press of lips to skin. It’s as if he’d tested just how far he was allowed. She offers but a hint, a sneaky slip of skin exposed, untouched by the attentions of a lover until now. Anjou revels in that reticent delight, a smile just shy paired with an inquisitive hum, leaving no objections ( why would she? ). What he does is a gesture of appreciation above all else, she knows.

        ❛   Well, if you keep it up you might be meeting them sooner than you think …   ❜

It falls almost melodic, rolling quietly from her tongue, a whisper, low and honeyed. Perhaps he’s overly saccharine, but it’s a trait which intrigues her. How accustomed she’d grown to secrecy and steel guises, to white lies and other falsehoods. Kazutame retains his innocuous honesty, reveals his thoughts to her, and he does so with shame absent from his words. Little did he know, she’d been attentive from their initial meeting, undoubtably charmed by his hospitality and infectious personality. But through the humour and bonding, she’d distanced herself, evaluated his intentions, tried to gauge whether it was a welcome risk to unwind the fetters of her heart from emotional trauma ( still does a father’s sin sting ; abandoning flesh and blood for the fruits and fortunes of the sea ). She sees now that such caution is naught but an exhausting task, unnecessary. He’d certainly proven his worth and value tenfold.

To be introduced to a Keeper’s family was an honour indeed, as per their traditions. Beyond happenstance or urgency, anyone not hailing from their clan was considered foreign, unwelcome, a threat. What territories were their own were defended with vehemence ; with the exception of visitors, it was unlikely they’d encroach upon their settlements — a scout of their sister clans was oft the first and only encounter to greet them. Their offerings of blessed blood, lapped by the earth of the Shroud, granted them access to the aetheric flow of the land. Any fluctuation or disturbances seldom went unnoticed, even a child still fresh from their trial could detect the energies of another. If an outsider was to meet the entirety of a family, they were lucky indeed, but luck didn’t dictate nor ensure acceptance.

        ❛   Jade is a staple. It’s in all of our traditional jewellery. So if you really want to get on her good side and impress her, you could bring her the high quality stuff. Of course —   ❜ 

There’s a fluttering of lashes, a mock coquettish smile,  ❛   I don’t see that as an issue for you, Kazu. If it’s anything like you showed me back at the Steppe, you’re golden.   ❜ 

Another giggle now, shaking away the façade. Fingers brush along his locks, sweeping away those to veil his features. There she raises, glides the bow of a lip to the scales lining the bridge of his nose, lingering a moment before dipping, pressing lips to his once more.

       ❛   Does it worry you that much? You’re perfect as you are, and I’m sure mom will be more than happy to see you. Matteo’s been her eyes for long enough. You can ask him in the morning when he returns, he’ll give an honest opinion. He never lies. Trust me, if he didn’t like you, he would have said so point blank.   ❜

     ❛ Keep doing what? This? ❜

     THAT KISS WAS hardly enough to satisfy him. In fact, it left him wanting more. A breathy chuckle escapes him, before he again brings his lips to her shoulder. He starts trailing kisses from her the end of her shoulder to her neck, taking his time and indulging her. He’d waited far too long to do so, after all. In this process, his arms had fallen to her sides, hands grip them gently, lifting her into his lap as he sat up fully. It was beginning to be quite clear the two were not all that tired. Again, their lips meet, for as long as she allowed. To finally part for air, he meets her gaze with a smirk, pressing her body against his. 

     ❛ Jade, huh? ❜

     HE CANT HELP BUT laugh as he says that. how ironic was that? the first day they met, he insisted upon giving her a jade colored stone. it was the color of her eyes after all. and all this time ( which was hardly THAT long at all ) she’d kept that stone. Now she wore it around her neck in something he wanted to so badly tie into her own traditions, but apparently, he didn’t even need to try at all. he’d done it all on luck since day one.

      ❛ I must REALLY be that good! ❜ his hands now play with the chain around her neck, and with that smirk still so evident on his lips, he tugs at it gently, pulling her a little closer, as if she wasn’t close enough already.  ❛ Jade reminds me of you.. you know? ❜ his voice was a whisper, they were pressed so close to one another, and he had no intentions of letting go. only if she so pleased.

      ❛ Every time I see it in the mines I see your eyes, and then your beautiful smile.. ❜ he’s kissing her again, his hands begun sliding up and down her back slowly.  ❛ I get distracted thinking of you. hmm.. but now it might be a bit worse. ❜ not that he minded. thinking of her made the work day a lot less grueling. now that she was officially his, the distraction was a lot more welcome.  ❛ I’ll get plenty, just let me know when you want me to meet your mother. ❜

     HAD MATTEO REALLY thought he was good enough for his sister? besides what he’d done for Nimue, he cannot consider any of his actions worthy enough for someone so deserving. He would ask eventually, but for right now, it wasn’t something he wanted to dwell in. He’ll accept what she says, not to upset her any further for the night. 

      ❛ I’ll save that for another time.. besides.. I don’t really want to think of your brother right now. not when we’re like this. ❜ it would be a little odd. they were twins, he didn’t wish to suddenly picture her brother in his lap right now. the thought causes a shudder. He takes that as a hint to go back to indulging himself within her, sliding his hands down to her thighs, brushing the bare skin with his thumbs, his eyes close and he’s resting his forehead against her’s, kissing her nose.  ❛ god I love you so much. ❜

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❥ BIG BROTHER!

          ❛   The hell — ?   ❜

          THE FURTHER SHE continues with her recount, the deeper, more pronounced the dip at his brow becomes. It’s an expression of skepticism, horrendously soured, a brand of doubt more quick to manifest through a jaw taut than through any words to leave his mouth.  

          ❛   I’ll give this no more than a day or two for it to sort itself out. Then I’m getting your blood tested for whatever I suspect it is.   ❜ 

He needed finer details ; somehow the mention of this man rouses suspicion in his bones. Generosity gone unchallenged was rare and questionable. Few parted with their goods or wares without so much as a breath carrying the mention of Gil, fewer still offered their services without the expectation of recompense. Had he been in her situation, he may have pressed a blade sooner to their gullet before the treat so much as swept his lips ( which was true for anything, sweets didn’t please his palate ). But he boasts far greater awareness than she, he knew of people’s intentions through instinct and experience, knew between genuine hearts and blackened ones. It came with that professional obligation of dancing between two moral extremes. He trusted a limited circle, and quite frankly he’d fostered more ambiguous relationships than dependable ones.

         ❛   Cake itself isn’t strange, no. But something about your circumstances isn’t adding up. The one time you wander off without company is the one time some strange man offers you food? Allergies were ruled out, and again, I’m doubting this is an aggressive case of the flu. Otherwise Yeran would have caught it. Her immune system is a joke.    ❜ 

What then? What could possibly be afflicting her? He teeters on the possibility of poison making the rounds throughout her veins, hot and acrid, sowing its ghastly influence, sapping her of strength — it’s an assumption he’d initially deemed improbable. Yet now he humours the thought ; much of Nimue’s past remained a mystery to them all, her amnesia fractured any mark in her history, right down to the minutiae. Preferences, dislikes, names — the entirety of her past was but an irrecoverable flicker he so futilely attempts to salvage. 

          ❛   What’s the rest of the story. Why did he specifically give you the cake.   ❜

     ❛ ..Later. ❜ she’d only heard half of what he’d said. her body was already surrendering to sleep. her response was nothing but a whisper now. for the first time in days, she was comfortable. it would hardly last long enough, though. her body still refused to cease shaking, and her pain was still there. in his arms, however, it was a bit easier to handle. the futon could not comfort her in the way he was able to. he won’t have to get her blood tested, she’s certain now that he’s home, she’ll be better in no time.  ❛ I feel better already. ❜  it was a faint whisper, as she’s asleep now. he’d only been back for a few moments, but that was all she could give him. it was more than she could give Anjou or Kazu earlier, so she will consider it an accomplishment for now.

     Kazutame came on an impromptu visit. He hadn’t expected to be here so soon after his previous visit, but he’d deemed the situation important. it was not a plea for him to come visit, more of drilling him for answers he might have. there were none, though. this sickness that plagued her was new to him, nothing he’s seen before on the Steppe. he even asked his mother, who had briefly met Nimue that day. in all of her years, she’d heard of no such illness. Kazu, though, he took that as a small loss. As he was an xaela, Nimue was a Raen. he was hopeful that for both he and Yeran, their cluelessness stemmed from their slight differences in race. He took to the markets. assuring Anjou and Yeran that they need not waste time by making a trip to the Steppe, that he would do it himself. immediately he visited stalls of Raen vendors, he took books, herbs, aromas and remedies that might just help her. it might seem excessive, but he thought it was better to be over prepared than under. he was going on little, he had no idea what she looked like or what she needed. she was far too important to everyone for him to spare any expenses.

     so when he had finally gotten there, not even a day after he received the call, he could feel it in the air. compared to his previous visit, something was wrong. if he’d been without context, he’s sure he would have felt it anyway, that was how dire the situation was. he wasn’t sure what to expect, but it took only one glance at the poor girl to realize how bad it was. she was smaller. obvious that she hadn’t been eating, and if she had, it came right back up along with the rest of her body weight. if she were to get any smaller, she’d be practically invisible. it was something he thought of every day since, and while it hadn’t been that long, nothing he has done thus far was working. so as he quietly makes his way back into her room to change one of the scents, he gives Matteo a guilty look. she was practically swallowed in his arms.

      ❛ I wish I was more help. ❜ he feels so terrible he can’t do more. he knows what she means to them. she is family.  ❛ I keep going through the books, but her symptoms aren’t matching up with anything. the Raen tribes gave me whatever they could, too. ❜ he pauses as he stands, he was sure the aromas were not doing anything to help her, if anything they made her sleepy. but it was better than her staying up in pain.  ❛ I'll keep trying, though. ❜

     Nimue, during this time, had begun to whine in her sleep. somehow, she’d manage to curl herself into more of a ball against him, gripping the fabric of Matteo’s shirt. ❛ she’s been asking for you, so maybe she’ll start to get better now that you’re back. ❜ he could only hope. ❛ I’ve only been here once, and it feels too weird without her lighting up the place. ❜

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continue’d from discord, via @ehnmi

The remark about Matteo causes a small giggle to escape her, breaking the melancholy to take hold. She’s thankful for him, thankful he’s able to inspire her own strength within. It was unusual for her to rely on the aid of others in such a way, typically she’s the one inspiring strength within her peers, posing as their pillar of reason and stability. Some days, however, she succumbed to her own vulnerability. Such times were shared only in the presence of her brother, who she trusted, who’d seen every facet she possessed — the raw side, the broken side, and strong side. This night Kazutame had been privy to her inner world, and while her flustered state was less than ideal, it signified her ability to open up to another outside of her own blood or found family. 

“You’ll be fine…” Another giggle, that smile finally brightening her features. She’d scooted upwards a bit, wrapping her arms around his neck before pressing her lips briefly to his. “I’m sure he already has an idea of what going on. Probably since day one. It’s hard to hide anything from him, really.” Anjou closes her eyes, placing a hand to her chest, above her heart, “Everyone in the tribe is connected by our aether. But my connection is strongest with Matteo, he’s my other half. In The Shroud — back home — he can feel if I’m in pain, or scared… or in love if I allow it. Very rarely do I hide that from him. We trust each other fully. I can tell he’s known for quite a while, possibly even before I knew myself.”

Pulling back a bit, what tears remain are wiped away, and another giggle falls from lips, “I will tell him soon. You don’t need to hide from him. His bite is the same as his bark, I won’t lie, but he can tell when people have good intentions.” She rests against him once more, relishes the security, shares her thoughts, “Will it really be so strange to them? They’re no strangers to Xaela. Tuya and Yeran are regulars and business partners. We’ve never really been a ‘normal’ family anyways. So that weirdness you’re known by will fit right in. Besides, if Matteo accepts you, then you’ve already gotten over the most difficult hurdle. Mom is much easier to impress than he is.” 

 But, she’d withheld a bit then, and fails to mention that her brother and mother were quite difficult to impress, period. From what she’d seen from their interactions, however, shows there’s little for her to worry about. She understands his hesitance regardless, Matteo could singlehandedly trounce a group of Roegadyn if necessary. 

 “You being a miner gives you bonus points, though.”

HIS HANDS, they fall to the small of her back. Thumbs caress it, looking to her with a loving gaze. This was a tease. A preview of what was to come? He could only fantasize for now. ( and fantasize he will. ) Those giggles, too? He could just die. How is it that with such a melancholy, yet bittersweet conversation, she could still light up the room? He IS the luckiest man in the world right now. He’d always thought she was an angel, he just never thought she’d be his angel. He’s kissing her in between her pauses, it was only fair. She was so close. It would be wrong to not take advantage. ❛ And he didn’t say a word? We could have started this forever ago! ❜ He’s only joking, slightly.

AS SHE SPEAKS, he listens. He could not lie though, despite his attention, it was hardly full. There were kisses to her forehead, to her shoulder. His shirt was far too large for her frame, leaving them exposed. He was to love every part of her, with every word she said he’d hum, pressing one, maybe two kisses to her shoulder. She might have pulled away, but he had an advantage in his stature. All it took was just a little bit of leaning forward, and he was in reach to give her the love she deserved. He would not dare take it further, though. He just would like to tease in return. ❛ I’m excited to meet all of them. I’m excited to be apart of the more important side of your life. ❜ He was not nervous, the way she spoke about her family was light. Full of adoration and love. Her eyes were full of stars, her smile was beautiful. In truth, he asked questions just to see that look on her face, and he so desperately wanted to keep that smile, that brightness in her eyes forever. ❛ You speak so highly of them, and your culture. I want to see all of it, and try to be apart of it. ❜ 

HIS OWN CULTURE, he was not apart of. The simple idea of being apart of something was so foreign to him. THAT was something he was nervous for. He did not want to disappoint her tribe, or embarrass them. He was so deeply afraid that he would do something to cause her to lose her feelings for him, just like everyone else did. It was not so easy for him to love as it seemed. Before Anjou, there was no one.

HE PONDERS the statement about him being a miner, and he chuckles. How easy in his euphoria that he forgot what they were initially doing before he’d confessed his feelings. Their mess still left out on the table. ❛ Bribe your mother into liking me? You must think I’m a fool. ❜ It was a rather good idea, though. ❛ What kind is her favorite? ❜

[fragalis]

Strawberry colada smoothie

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@a.a.w.s

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🍑M Y • Y O U T H • I S • Y O U R S🍑