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The urge to bother my mutuals

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Crowley said in S1E2: "I didn't mean to fall, I just hung around the wrong people" in the most heartwrenching tone you've heard in your life, and still we are surprised that Aziraphale assumed Crowley might theoretically want to go back to Heaven? Yeah okay.

(Disclaimer: I'm aware he evolved since then and went through major character development. Just scooting the shades of grey into the light)

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I'm currently rewatching Good Omens season 1, so expect a bunch of posts with post season2 realizations. But here comes the first:

In s1e1, when discussing Warlock's fate, Crowley suggests Aziralphale could kill the boy, so that humanity would live. Aziralphale, however, is shocked at that suggestion and refuses to comply.

It seems Crowley has taught him well. After 2 seasons of development, there he is! Choosing humanity over the happiness of an individual.

How unfortunate it is, that this individual happens to be the very demon who presented this concept to him in the first place.

Poor Crowley. Creator of his own doom.

(Disclaimer: I know there are lots of other influences that led to Az's decision, but I still found the parallel quite intresting)

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I am simply not interested in taking sides when it comes to aziraphale and crowley's little cosmic divorce. this is a jane austen romance, which means that both of our romantic leads need to grow and change before they can have their happily ever after. the problem isn't that one of them is Right and the other is Wrong, the problem is that they're each prioritizing a different problem and then approaching the problem they've backburnered with a long-standing habit or belief that they need to grow out of before they can succeed.

aziraphale is correct that heaven needs fixing! we can quibble over whether accepting a job as the boss is the right way to do that, but ultimately leaving michael or whoever in charge is going to lead to armageddon 2 armageddon harder. it simply will not work. the problem is that he's fumbling the relationship with crowley because he still needs to get over the idea of there being an inherently good and bad side and he needs to stop thinking that it's crowley being a demon that's keeping them apart. it's his own black and white logic that's doing that.

meanwhile, crowley is correct that he and aziraphale need to Name The Relationship and stop fucking around, and also that heaven and hell are the same institution with different labels and it's insane to think either of them is Good. but his impulse to respond to everything by trying to grab aziraphale and run is not gonna cut it here. "you can't fix an institution from the inside" is a philosophy of dubious value if your alternative is not attempting to fix it at all. if aziraphale is being held back by his cops and robbers mentality, crowley is being held back by cynicism and fear. they both need to let go of their flawed moral philosophies and emotional bad habits if they want to keep the world safe and be together! that's the point of the story splitting them up in the first place!

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I have not experienced this amount of brainrot since Our Flag means Death, which was my first major brainrot after The Magnus Archives and I am starting to notice a pattern.

My brain wants me to be in PAIN.

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I cracked it. Seeing Gabriel and Beelzebub fucking off to the stars felt exctly as if Mycroft Holmes and Greg Lestrade came ut as gay at the end of Sherlock season 4.

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I hope we're all aware, that if either of them actually made the decision to join the other, that would mean such a huge sacrifice that the relationship would suffer under it anyway.

If Aziraphale did change his mind and say no to the post of Archangel, he would be burdened by so much guilt that it would consume him. If he wouldn't even try to fix Heaven, I'm pretty sure he'd never sleep again.

If Crowley joined Aziraphale in Heaven, he would lose it being back in the place he hates, away from humanity (which he loves), forced to conform to ideals he swore off.

So isn't asking either of them to give up their own boundaries for the sake of romance kind of...immoral?

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I feel like the only reason (except his awful choice of words), why so many people innitially accused Aziraphale of doing the wrong thing is simply the fact that Crowley's position is a lot more known and relatable to us than Aziraphale's is.

It's a lot easier to relate to the urge to settle down and have a pieceful existence with your favorite person, than to the responsibility of carrying the world's fate on your shoulders. It's a lot more mundane.

But at the core of it, that's what makes Good Omens such a good tragedy: There was no right choice. Either choice, for both of them, would have had massive and potentially disasterous consequences. There are the shades of grey, that after all that this show has taught us, many of us still seem to ignore. We got exactly what we were promised. We just don't want to admit it.

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Dear friends...why are we surprised that Aziraphale made the decision he made after literally compromising his and Crowley's "peaceful existence" by letting Gabriel stay with him in the very first episode? And then throughout the whole season? Risking getting caught like twice an episode?

The next time I hear someone say his decision was out of character I'd like to know what character we're talking about, exactly.