ftwraw - Tumblr blog

[ftwraw]

“Don’t make excuses for why you can’t get it done. Focus on all the reasons why you must make it happen.”

— Unknown

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People feel things at different levels.

When I was young I would wonder why every time anything hurt me or someone around me I would feel the magnitude of it throughout my entire body at levels that were incomprehensible at the time. All my friends would do things and never think about it again, while I’m overthinking enough for the both of us. I felt entirely too much and understood too much; too early. I didn’t know how to process the emotions that I was forced to deal with and would constantly daydream about ending my life so that I didn’t have to feel this way for the rest of my life, I was only 8 when the thought first crossed my mind. My family only knew me as the happy go lucky kid I always was, so I would put up a front, a facade , while knowing full well I was gonna have another attempt that night. Hand fulls of narcotics, cuts to the bone, carelessness is all that I’ve known. My fatal attempts were never to be known, even now as I tell it, I’m a faceless name as my story unfolds. I’m 26 now and I’m no longer alone, I have my family by me, but no place to call home.

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I’m scared of letting you in, just for you to hate what’s inside

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I can see your face when I close my eyes. I haven’t slept since.

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I’ve learned to accept that I’ll never get better. I’m surrounded by walls in this dark, damp, depressing space. And Deep down I know I’ll never escape..

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I’m only in pain when I’m in love

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Opps

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we dont even get 9/11 off of work. like i guess you were never THAT sad about it

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10.18.23

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"my child is fine" your child is still running their tumblr blog from middle school

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i was not made for hookup culture, i was made for the most soul crushing experience ever. i was born to feel everything entirely and endlessly. i was made to feel everything deeply

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