futuristicallycasualstrawberry

[futuristicallycasualstrawberry]

that one friend that doesn’t play about salman toor paintings

[futuristicallycasualstrawberry]

what i need rn is a good haircut, and i will be fixed

[futuristicallycasualstrawberry]

i haven't worn a watch in at least 7 years now but have been wanting one for a while lately. the day before The Exam™ (that i spent the better part of the last year being miserable and stressed over) i get a package in the post. and it's a watch that my friend who lives in the US has bought from her own money and had shipped to me along with the sweetest, most heartwarming note telling me she loves in me and believes in me. my heart is bursting at the seams just thinking about her, i don't know what i did to deserve her but i love her so much.

[futuristicallycasualstrawberry]

i consolidated my sad-posting into 10 minutes of jam packed misery now i am back to thinking about happy things like The Ocean and my friends

[futuristicallycasualstrawberry]

staying at home does Evil things to your brain and to your psyche, it twists and contorts your sense of self into strange balloon animals like you've never seen before

[futuristicallycasualstrawberry]

father looks down on me seeing my therapist and shames me every time i book a new appointment saying "i can just be your therapist instead" as if he is not half the reason I am going in the first place

[futuristicallycasualstrawberry]

i think one year of staying at home has got me craving momentum and movement so badly i am willing to do Evil things to get them (a finance degree)

[futuristicallycasualstrawberry]

a different kind of misery hits me if i continue listening to mitski songs post 1am

[futuristicallycasualstrawberry]

life just feels like an endless cycle of looking back on old photos and thinking about how much better/happier i looked then

[futuristicallycasualstrawberry]

whoops lost myself for about eight years there

[futuristicallycasualstrawberry]

[sitting completely still in my own bed] this world is gutting me like a fish

[futuristicallycasualstrawberry]

this summer i will learn italian and french and russian and run a marathon everyday and work for three months and get fifty new ear piercings and read every work of high literature ever created and watch every movie. but most importantly just chill and relax

[futuristicallycasualstrawberry]

this wouldn't be happening if i had a mentor that was deeply interested in me and my life and guided me with a firm hand even when i was overwhelmed. whatever.

[futuristicallycasualstrawberry]

[futuristicallycasualstrawberry]

every forest is enchanted btw. stop being stupid and look with your eyes

[futuristicallycasualstrawberry]

i think about this tweet often. i feel such kinship with this

[futuristicallycasualstrawberry]

fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck