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g33kl0ve · 6 years
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Oops they found me
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g33kl0ve · 6 years
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I may not be a perfect person but at least I have never yelled at an employee in a store
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g33kl0ve · 8 years
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8.21.16
Husband (packing a box of books): We need to put some paper filler in here, don’t want the words sloshing around. There’s a couple of sex books in here - you definitely don’t want those banging together.
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g33kl0ve · 8 years
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8_20_16
In 1928, dinosaurs lived at Chattanooga, but they died at Chattanooga.
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g33kl0ve · 8 years
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Husband: Mommy is a dumbass
Child: Do *not* call my mommy that word!
Husband: I didn’t call her “that word” - I called her a dumbass!
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g33kl0ve · 8 years
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Child: I HAVE AN IDEA!!!!!
Husband: Is it to talk really loudly?
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g33kl0ve · 8 years
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Child: I work in I.T. Husband: What do you do? Are you a programmer? Child: No. So, I get a hammer, and- Husband: Oh, so you are a programmer.
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g33kl0ve · 8 years
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Help! My wife keeps reading creepy pastas and making herself scared and then I have to watch scooby doo with her help her calm down
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g33kl0ve · 8 years
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I want to take a moment to send my love and solidarity to LGBT Muslims in light of what’s going on. I know the pressure on you is already so high. Your faith is not to blame for this, you are not to blame for this. You’re allowed to mourn, too.
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g33kl0ve · 8 years
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People are just as wonderful as sunsets if you let them be. When I look at a sunset, I don’t find myself saying, “Soften the orange a bit on the right hand corner.” I don’t try to control a sunset. I watch with awe as it unfolds.
Carl R. Rogers (via oofpoetry)
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g33kl0ve · 8 years
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Child wanted to play "Simon Says." Child was Simon.
First off, after a couple of rounds, child went "Simon says: touch your feet," and child reaches out and touches my foot and says "I'll touch yours for you, mommy."
Then, "Simon says touch your computer. Simon says type. Simon says type 'little hamster in a little house'" - tiny hamster being one of child’s favorite things on the internet.
Clever child...
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g33kl0ve · 8 years
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Dear whoever decided to make flavored marshmallows: I am not sure if I love you or if I hate you, but I definitely have emotions and want to give you dollars.
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g33kl0ve · 8 years
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Child: (with NO provocation or lead-in, literally ten minutes after coming home from school). I need to find paint. This door needs to be brown. All doors should always be brown.
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g33kl0ve · 9 years
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“Happy Happy Birthday Something Something This is a fuckin’ song.” Husband’s rendition of the birthday song.
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g33kl0ve · 9 years
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Husband: (Describing some situation): Well, I was making child read the update notes on Minecraft...
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g33kl0ve · 9 years
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Child: CAN I HAVE A PIECE OF QUIET, PLEASE?
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g33kl0ve · 9 years
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Child: <Says something to husband while he is taking a sip of coffee> Husband: <Replies> Child: <Moment of silence/awe> You can hear me when you’re taking a drink???
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