geekysteven

[geekysteven]

"imagine them in their underwear" is weird sanitised advice for people who think the most debased thing someone can be is naked, but not so naked that they're morally discomforting. what you have to do, if you want stage presence, is imagine them as your soulless undead army

[geekysteven]

[geekysteven]

Will I get Baldur’s Gate 3 if I haven't played Baldur's Driveway 3 and Baldur's Front Porch 3

[geekysteven]

[geekysteven]

they need to invent the opposite of an nda called an fda where u have to tell everyone everything

[geekysteven]

[geekysteven]

Professor X: What's your super power?

"I can change the identity of whoever I'm talking to"

Aunt May: holy shit

[geekysteven]

Stop letting your heart and your pussy choose your men.

[geekysteven]

The last time I took an Uber I spent the whole ride also enthusiastically going on about seeing this guy's wife

just drove a guy home from a bar and for the whole 15 minutes he talked about how excited he was to see his wife

[geekysteven]

[geekysteven]

[ID: photo of a hedge cut into the shape of a pig, with all the leaves blue. Text reads Sonic the hoghedge]

I guess Graphic Design class wasn’t a waste of time after all.

[geekysteven]

[geekysteven]

Confession time: every time I said “that really makes you think” I actually was thinking less. It made me think less, but I said that to throw you off the trail

[geekysteven]

[geekysteven]

You are experiencing penis drought…have faith…soon the cock will flow once more

Thank you....that means a lot

[geekysteven]

[geekysteven]

My daughter is playing a video game and complaining that the NPC companion isn't doing a good enough job of killing the enemies.

"I'm not trying to be rude to her, but my ASSISTANT is not that helpful"