gen-vieve

[gen-vieve]

[gen-vieve]

The overwhelming urge to walk off and go missing.

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how to build confidence

Confidence is a wonderful thing to have, but it's not something we're born with. Second guessing your dreams or being paralyzed by pre-conceptions of your abilities can damage your ability to achieve you potential. Having poor self esteem isn't something to be ashamed of, it's something you can improve.

Here are some practical tips on gradually improving your confidence.

Be kind to yourself. Make an active effort to say nice things about yourself. Take good care of your mind and your body. You're a person, you're important and you deserve kindness.

Remember your positive qualities. Write them down and add to the list regularly, even daily if possible. It's especially important to do this on the days you need to think hard about what your positive traits are.

Set goals and achieve them. Start with simple goals, such as making your bed every day for a week. Build up to larger more difficult tasks. Actually completing these goals will build trust within yourself and will make you see how capable and competent you are. Monitor your progress in a notebook so you can look back on your achievements when you're feeling insecure.

Practice self forgiveness. If you make a mistake, commit to doing better and move on. You don't have to hold on to that feeling. Take a deep breath and release it with the intention of moving on.

Counter negative thoughts. Whenever you catch yourself thinking poorly of yourself, stand up to it. Argue with the self doubt and win. The more you do it, the easier it will get.

Stick to your values. Don't do anything you don't believe in. Avoid people who pressure you to break your value system.

Try things, even if you fail. Stepping out of your comfort zone and trying to achieve things will give you a rich life experience and will help you understand that failure is not the worst thing that can happen to you. Taking opportunities that are handed to you will give you agency to achieve bigger things.

Don't let people disrespect you. Be firm with your boundaries and stand up for yourself whenever anybody messes with you. Don't stoop to their level and carry on with you life, with people who actually care about you.

Keep your promises and don't make promises you can't keep. This will improve other people's confidence in you and make you feel like a reliable person.

Keep your bigger goals in mind. If you're trying to get good grades, remember that when you're down to choosing between going out with friends and studying. If you want to run a race and get a good time, remember that when you want an extra five minutes of sleep in the morning.

Show off your achievements and be proud of yourself. You deserve the spotlight for anything you're proud of. Celebrate yourself every step of the way.

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study methods

the second brain method

this method focuses on organizing the information you learn to maximize effectiveness. a common way of doing this is through the CODE method:

capture - be quick and efficient in how you receive the information

organize - organize the information in a way that works for you

distill - break the information down to its key elements

express - apply the information you’ve learned

* there is a ton of information out there about this method. if you struggle with burnout and knowing where to start, i recommend researching this method further to figure out what works for you.

the pomodoro method

the pomodoro method is a time management method. the most common expression of this method is to pick a task, work for 25 minutes on that task, then take a break for 5 minutes. then, repeat. if you’re planning to work all day, you may up the time spent studying. for example, after a while of this, you may work for 30 minutes at a time, then 40, then 45, and so forth. this method is particularly good for when you’re feeling unmotivated or having a hard time focusing. if you’re still not feeling it after a while, you may start to take longer breaks. for example, you may study for 30 minutes, break for 15, and keep going like that.

the 5 minute rule method

this method is good for when you have to do a shorter task, but you’re procrastinating doing it. this method requires you to dedicate only 5 minutes to do your task. after that, you may stop, but chances are, once you’ve started, finishing won’t be as difficult.

the blurting method

this method is particularly good for revision. the blurting method requires you to read over the content you are learning, then put it away and write down everything you know or can remember. then, check the content and revise everything you didn’t write down.

spaced repetition

spaced repetition requires you to spread out your study reviews over the period of a few days. this has been shown to improve memory. rather than studying one thing at a time, then studying something else the next day and so on, review the information right after you’ve learned it, then recall it after a few hours, then a few days, then a few weeks, and so on. if you’re studying something you will need to remember for an extended period of time, this method would be perfect for you!

active recall

this is my absolute favorite method! it’s been shown to improve your studying immensely and so many people have benefited from practicing active recall. active recall involves retrieving information from your brain, usually done through questions. a good way to do this is to explain the concept to yourself, to someone else, or act like you’re doing a presentation on the subject. after you’ve recalled all of the information you know about the subject, go over your material again and be sure you covered everything and explained everything the best way you could. if you didn’t, review everything you did not remember or got wrong, and go again. do this until you get everything. doing this can also be referred to as the feynman technique.

the SQ3r method

survey - skim your text and identify bolded text, headers, images, etc.

question - generate questions about the text based on what you surveyed. what are the key concepts in this text? what is each paragraph about? what information do i need to take away from this text?

read - read through the entire text and answer the questions you created

recite - summarize what you learned in your own words

review - recall the key concepts and answers to your questions

[gen-vieve]

What a completely weird dream with the most random characters.

[gen-vieve]

Gaining & Maintaining Power: A Reading List

Power & Manipulation

48 Laws of Power by Robert Green

The Prince by Machiavelli

Games People Play: The Basic Handbook of Transactional Analysis by Eric Berne

The Dictator's Handbook: Why Bad Behavior is Almost Always Good Politics by Bruce Bueno de Mesquita

Power: Why Some People Have It - And Others Don't by Jeffrey Pfeffer

The Wisdom of Psychopaths: What Saints, Spies, and Serial Killers Can Teach Us About Success by Kevin Dutton

Charisma & Social Skills

How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie

Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High by Kerry Patterson

How to Talk to Anyone: 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships by Leil Lowndes

The Charisma Myth: How Anyone Can Master the Art and Science of Personal Magnetism by Olivia Fox Cabane

Captivate: The Science of Succeeding with People by Vanessa Van Edwards

Never Eat Alone, And the Other Secrets to Success, One Relationship at a Time by Keith Ferrazzi

The Like Switch: An Ex-FBI Agent's Guide to Influencing, Attracting, and Winning People Over by Jack Schafer

Persuasion

The Art of Seduction by Robert Green

Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion by Robert Cialdini

Win Bigly: Persuasion in a World Where Facts Don't Matter by Scott Adams

Pre-Suasion: Channeling Attention for Change by Robert Cialdini

Win Your Case: How to Present, Persuade, and Prevail, Every Place, Every Time by Gerry Spence

Nudge: Improving Decisions About Health, Wealth, and Happiness by Richard Thaler

Methods of Persuasion: How to Use Psychology to Influence Human Behavior by Nick Kolenda

You Can Read Anyone: Never Be Fooled, Lied to, or Taken Advantage of Again by David Lieberman

Influencer: The New Science of Leading Change by Kerry Patterson

Psychology

Thinking, Fast and Slow by Daniel Kahneman

The Art of Choosing by Sheena Iyengar

Drive: The Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us by Daniel Pink

Predictably Irrational: The Hidden Forces That Shape Our Decisions by Dan Ariely

Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman

The Laws of Human Nature by Robert Green

Philosophy and Mindset

Meditations by Marcus Aurelius

Letters from a Stoic by Seneca

Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl

Mastery by Robert Green

The Law of Success by Napoleon Hill

Antifragile: Things That Gain from Disorder by Nassim Taleb

The Daily Stoic by Ryan Holiday

Ikigai: The Japanese Secret to a Long and Happy Life by Hector Garcia

Public Speaking, Rhetoric, and Debating

Rhetoric by Aristotle

How to Argue & Win Every Time by Gerry Spence

The Quick and Easy Way to Effective Speaking by Dale Carnegie

The Art of Public Speaking by Dale Carnegie

Talk Like TED: The 9 Public Speaking Secrets of the World's Top Minds by Carmine Gallo

Verbal Judo: The Gentle Art of Persuasion by George Thompson, PhD

Thank You for Arguing by Jay Heinrichs

p.s. a lot of these can be found on z-library.

xoxo ❤️

[gen-vieve]

★ Scripting your new life ★

~ these are a few ideas for scripting your new life / making your manifestation boards ~

Financial / Business :

Income you want to make

The title you would like to acquire

Where are you working

A business you'd like to start

What do you wear to work

Relationships :

The type of lover you wish to attract

Types of friends you'd love to be around

Lessons you'd like to share with others

How many children do you want

How do you show your love to others

What characteristics does your ideal s/o have

Health :

What are your health goals in the next 6m / year

What is your ideal body type

Health habits you would like to start

What are you eating to stay fit

How does your new body feel

Personal :

How does your new room look

Books you would like to read

Places your new self will visit

A problem you would like to solve

How do you dress every day

Where do you live

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Femme Fatale Guide: How To Cultivate Self-Discipline

Know Your Why: Always Keep The End In Mind 

Keep Small Promises To Yourself. Make Them Non-Negotiable. 

Create And Consistently Log Your Progress 

Take Temptations Out Of Sight 

Find Indulgences To Help You Focus On Your Goals 

Know Your Why: Always Keep The End In Mind 

Decisiveness drives discipline. You need to clarify and define your goals. State them clearly with their authentic purpose in mind. If you seduce this end goal into your life, what desire are you truly fulfilling? Ex. If you want to lose 10 pounds: Is it to feel healthier? Look better in a bikini? Fit into a certain pair of jeans? No matter how superficial, identify the genuine reason why you want to achieve a certain goal. Whatever reason elicits a visceral and emotional reaction. Sometimes, especially during a busy work day, your reason could be as simple as wanting to lessen your anxiety and ease into a more relaxed state. Any purpose that resonates. Once you have an emotional response tied to a goal, it becomes infinitely easier to motivate yourself to take small steps towards achieving it. Where energy goes, energy flow. Simon Sinek goes more in-depth with this concept in Start With Why.

Keep Small Promises To Yourself. Make Them Non-Negotiable.

Think of performing self-discipline rituals as confidence-building exercises. This action helps you trust yourself, establishes a sense of integrity, and builds self-confidence. For example, if you stick to your meal and workout plan for 5 days a week, you build trust in knowing you're more powerful than your cravings and are capable of taking good care of your body. If you complete a project on schedule (personal or professional), you prove to yourself that you’re efficient, build confidence in your ability to finish tasks you start, and self-affirm that you follow through on your ideas. Finishing that book this month reflects confirms that you value yourself enough to expand your mind, learn, and expand your knowledge base. Eventually, through enough consistent repetition, these rituals into unconscious habits that you do effortlessly in daily life. 

Create And Consistently Log Your Progress 

You can’t manage what you don’t measure – your finances, calorie and step counts, workouts, productivity, etc. Tracking data related to your habits – such as your spending habits, eating or workout patterns, writing word count, and task completion – on a given day or week – allows you to understand and analyze your current behavior. What habit cues, environmental or other situational factors are keeping you from sticking to the current task at hand? Do you leave your running shoes stuffed in the back of the closet? Junk food in the house? Work from bed or with your phone by your side? Are you avoiding certain emotions? Does this data change when you’re stressed or tired?  

Awareness is the first step towards redirected action. Analyze these data points to see your pitfalls and strategize how to help yourself. 

Take Temptations Out Of Sight

Set yourself up to win. Get the phone away from your workspace, remove any junk food or soda from the house, delete apps, or silence notifications from people who distract you from your goals. Self-discipline becomes significantly easier when you have to take additional steps to indulge in your vices. Replace these temptations with helpful cues to help you build healthier habits that lead to self-discipline. Give yourself visual cues to move you toward your goals. Keep a journal with a pen next to your bed. Leave your workout clothes and shoes out near your bed. Write a quick to-do list right before finishing work for the following day, so it’s easier to jump into the first task right away the next morning. Cut up some produce or do a 30-60 minute meal prep once a week to eat more healthful meals. Find ways to make it easier to stay on track than give in to temptation. 

Find Indulgences To Help You Focus On Your Goals 

Self-discipline shouldn’t feel like deprivation – of certain foods, pastimes, or activities you enjoy. Buy cute workout clothes you feel confident in. Create the most dance-worthy playlist. Make it a priority to buy your favorite fruits and vegetables every week. Rotate a selection of your favorite healthy meals. Leave your sunscreen out – front and center – on your bathroom counter. Find a big, beautiful water bottle to keep on your desk. Purchase aesthetic notebooks, pens, planners, journals, and other office organization items. To make self-discipline feel like second nature, you need to marry indulgences and your desire to meet your goals. Discover the habits that work for you and find small ways to make these tasks more enjoyable. 

Go easy on yourself. Build one habit at a time. Self-discipline is like a muscle. It requires time to build and grows in increments. Try to stay on track and more focused than yesterday. Your only competition is your former self. Find pleasure in the process. Focus on the immediate task in front of you while also keeping your future self in mind. 

[gen-vieve]

Interviews with Incredible Women

Here are some interviews that I think are absolutely brilliant, and I’ll explain why.

These women are trailblazers in what they do and I think, have really nailed the interview process down and you can tell because the more natural a person appears to be on camera, the more effort has gone into looking that way. Uneasiness, discomfort, shyness are easily spotted, especially with body language - and you can see the confidence just radiating from them.

Now, you may not like some of these women for whatever reason. I don’t really care about that - I’m simply looking at their oratorship, their presence in front of everyone and how they carry themselves. There’s obviously lots of powerful female orators, leaders and figures out there but I can’t possibly list them all so excuse me if I’ve missed out on your favourites - I’ll add them next time.

There’s a few things these women have in common:

1. They don’t always jump to answer. They think for a second or two before answering.

2. There are no filler sounds. They speak at a measured rate, which allows them to think ahead about their sentences.

3. They have a vast vocabulary.

4. They are not shy in disagreeing with the person in front of them. None of that diplomatic nonsense. There is clearly a strong sense of self identity and personality, unapologetically.

5. They show their vulnerabilities, weaknesses and hard times as thing of the past and accept them without a fuss- they don’t oppress themselves with it, and come across as strong survivors rather than wallowing in self pity. It’s what makes people admire them.

6. They don’t answer what they dont want to. And they beat around the bush with it, clearly stating that they will not answer those questions.

7. One thing I loved about Rekha’s interview - when questioned about an ex lover, she asks: “hey, is this interview about me or Mr Bacchan?” And it didnt come across as haughty or egoistical.

8. There’s feminineness in their strength. Them being strong in their stances is not masculine, overly aggressive or yelling - its firm, to the point, yet graceful.

This is what you should be looking at, carefully:

- body language

- Vocabulary

- Talking speed

- Gestures

- Facial expressions

- Voice modulation

- Expressing emotions

Video Links

1. Rekha

2. Princess Ameerah Al-Taweel

3. Meryl Streep

4. Indira Gandhi

5. Princess Diana

6. President Sirleaf

7. Lady Gaga

8. Naomi Campbell and Vivienne Westwood

9. Anna Karina

10. Michelle Yeoh

11. Mika Brzezinksi

[gen-vieve]

Superfoods you should incorporate in your diet:

Superfoods are nutrient-dense foods that are considered beneficial for your health due to their high concentration of vitamins, minerals, antioxidants, and other beneficial compounds.

Combine these superfoods with a variety of other whole foods to ensure you're getting a wide range of nutrients. Also, be mindful of portion sizes and any individual dietary restrictions or allergies you may have.

Berries: Blueberries, strawberries, raspberries, and other berries are rich in antioxidants, fiber, and vitamins.

Leafy greens: Spinach, kale, Swiss chard, and other leafy greens are packed with vitamins, minerals, and fiber. They are low in calories and provide important nutrients like vitamin K, vitamin C, and folate.

Cruciferous vegetables: Broccoli, cauliflower, Brussels sprouts, and cabbage are part of the cruciferous vegetable family. They contain compounds that may help reduce the risk of certain cancers.

Nuts and seeds: Almonds, walnuts, chia seeds, flaxseeds, and hemp seeds are excellent sources of healthy fats, protein, fiber, and various vitamins and minerals.

Fish: Fatty fish like salmon, sardines, and mackerel are rich in omega-3 fatty acids, which are beneficial for heart health and brain function.

Whole grains: Quinoa, brown rice, oats, and whole wheat are examples of whole grains that provide fiber, vitamins, and minerals.

Legumes: Beans, lentils, chickpeas, and other legumes are high in fiber, protein, and various nutrients. They are also a good source of plant-based protein.

Turmeric: This spice contains curcumin, a compound with potent anti-inflammatory and antioxidant properties.

Green tea: Green tea is rich in antioxidants called catechins and is believed to have various health benefits, including improved brain function and a lower risk of certain diseases.

Dark chocolate: Dark chocolate with a high cocoa content (70% or higher) is a source of antioxidants and may have positive effects on heart health and mood.

Avocado: Avocados are rich in healthy fats, fiber, and various vitamins and minerals. They also provide a good source of potassium.

Greek yogurt: Greek yogurt is a protein-rich food that also contains beneficial probiotics, calcium, and vitamin B12.

Sweet potatoes: Sweet potatoes are packed with vitamins, minerals, and fiber. They are an excellent source of beta-carotene, which is converted into vitamin A in the body.

Garlic: Garlic contains sulfur compounds that have been associated with potential health benefits, including immune support and cardiovascular health.

Ginger: Ginger has anti-inflammatory properties and is commonly used to aid digestion and relieve nausea.

Seaweed: Seaweed, such as nori, kelp, and spirulina, is a rich source of minerals like iodine, as well as antioxidants and omega-3 fatty acids.

Pomegranate: Pomegranates are packed with antioxidants and are believed to have anti-inflammatory properties. They are also a good source of vitamin C and fiber.

Cacao: Raw cacao is the purest form of chocolate and is rich in antioxidants, flavonoids, and minerals. It can be enjoyed as nibs, powder, or in dark chocolate form.

Quinoa: Quinoa is a gluten-free grain that provides a complete source of protein, along with fiber, vitamins, and minerals.

Extra virgin olive oil: Olive oil is a healthy fat option, particularly extra virgin olive oil, which is high in monounsaturated fats and antioxidants.

Chia seeds: Chia seeds are a great source of fiber, omega-3 fatty acids, and antioxidants. They can be added to smoothies, yogurt, or used as an egg substitute in recipes.

Beets: Beets are rich in antioxidants and are known for their vibrant color. They also contain nitrates, which have been shown to have beneficial effects on blood pressure and exercise performance.

Matcha: Matcha is a powdered form of green tea and is known for its high concentration of antioxidants. It provides a calm energy boost and can be enjoyed as a tea or added to smoothies and baked goods.

Algae: Algae, such as spirulina and chlorella, are nutrient-dense foods that are rich in protein, vitamins, minerals, and antioxidants. They are often consumed in powdered or supplement form.

Fermented foods: Fermented foods like sauerkraut, kimchi, kefir, and kombucha are rich in beneficial probiotics that support gut health and digestion.

Maca: Maca is a root vegetable native to the Andes and is often consumed in powdered form. It is known for its potential hormone-balancing properties and is commonly used as an adaptogen.

Goji berries: Goji berries are small red berries that are rich in antioxidants, vitamins, and minerals. They can be enjoyed as a snack or added to smoothies and oatmeal.

Hemp seeds: Hemp seeds are a great source of plant-based protein, healthy fats, and minerals like magnesium and iron. They can be sprinkled on salads, yogurt, or blended into smoothies.

Moringa: Moringa is a nutrient-dense plant that is rich in vitamins, minerals, and antioxidants. It is often consumed as a powder or used in tea.

Mushrooms: Certain mushrooms, such as shiitake, reishi, and maitake, have immune-boosting properties and are rich in antioxidants. They can be cooked and added to various dishes.