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[genderless-fuck-13]

Do you think Louis only loves Lestat b/c he has no other choice?

No. Louis loves Lestat because he’s Lestat. He loves Lestat’s heart, his soul, his willpower, his strength, his capacity to love and never give up hope, his stamina to overcome the darkness. Lestat’s radiance. Lestat’s light. That is what Louis loves. That is what Louis needs. No one else can nourish Louis, heart and body and mind and soul, like Lestat.

There is a moment in Tale Of The Body Thief in which Lestat asks Louis why he loves him.

“Have you suffered in my absence?” I asked, looking back at the altar. Very soberly he answered, “It was pure hell.” I didn’t reply.

“Each risk you take hurts me,” he said. “But that is my concern and my fault.”

“Why do you love me?” I asked.

“You know, you’ve always known. I wish I could be you. I wish I could know the joy you know all the time.”

“And the pain, you want that as well?”

“Your pain?” He smiled. “Certainly. I’ll take your brand of pain anytime, as they say.”

The show has already touched on this aspect of their relationship in Episode 1 when Louis tells Daniel “I wanted to murder the man. I wanted to be the man.” Louis doesn’t mean this literally. He’s saying he needs Lestat’s light to thrive, because Louis sees himself as being a wretched person. Louis wants to hold the same light as Lestat. The key to Louis and Lestat is that both of them view themselves as being unworthy, unlovable monsters. Neither of them think they are good enough for each other. However, they see each other as being something holy and sacred. Lestat wants to protect Louis from himself, and Louis wants to protect Lestat from himself.

When Louis tells Lestat in Prince Lestat And The Realms Of Atlantis that Lestat is going to be his god, it was said as a Biblical allegory from the story of Ruth and Naomi. One of the meanings behind that story is Ruth showing Naomi that home is not a place. It’s a person.

“Wither thou goest, I will go, and where thou lodgest, I will lodge; thy people shall be my people; and because I have no other god and never will, you shall be my god.”

Louis was referring to the fact that Lestat represented something divine to him. Lestat to Louis was holy, sacred, precious, revered. Lestat was the center of Louis’ entire being. Lestat’s light had become Louis’ light. Lestat is Louis’ home.

This goes back to Episode 1 as well. “I had plans to make a new life for myself in St. Louis. That was to be my destiny. And now I know I was right. Only it turns out the Saint is not a city, but a handsome man with the most agreeable disposition.”

Fast forward to Blood Communion in which Louis tells Lestat that Lestat is his life, after confessing that he had hated him for it.

“I love you with my whole soul, and I will always love you,” he confided to me. “You are my life. I have hated you for that and love you now so much that you’ve been my instructor in loving. And believe me when I say you will survive this, and that you must for all of us. You will survive because you always have and you always will.” I couldn’t answer. I knew I loved him more than words could say, but I couldn’t respond.

When Louis says he hated Lestat for being his life, he meant he hated that Lestat could love someone like him. Louis felt Lestat shouldn’t love him, because Louis didn’t believe he deserved that magnitude of love from a being as radiant and brilliant as Lestat. Louis says Lestat had become his instructor in loving. In other words, Louis had finally been able to make peace with himself, and he was finally able to allow himself to let Lestat love him, because Louis no longer believed in his own wicked nature. It’s the same transformation that Lestat had undergone. They made peace with themselves, and therefore they could freely give their all to each other. What they share is crippling love. Empowering love. Adoring love. Devoted love. Sacrificing love. Overwhelming love. Once-in-eternity love.

Yes, Louis loves Lestat.

[genderless-fuck-13]

Hi! I love your blog and your metas so much!

What are your thoughts on Lestat's promises to Louis in episode one in the church about becoming a vampire? I have seen his promises called "a lie," and I agree that being able to take away all of the bad in Louis' life with vampirism wasn't true, but I don't think Lestat ever meant his words to Louis there to be a lie. I see Lestat as being incredibly naive in a way, and it demonstrates how though he could observe the trauma and oppression Louis experienced he could never really understand all of what Louis had and continued to go through, especially the racial related oppression. Lestat has experienced so many hardships in his life, but many of their hardships are so different. Lestat really did hope that becoming a vampire could help Louis but becoming a vampire doesn't fix your problems and Lestat clearly didn't know how to help Louis later because Lestat doesn't have the best handle on his own issues. That brings me to another question though, how do you think Lestat feels about his own vampirism in terms of having "freed" himself? In a lot of ways, it is difficult to judge because we don't have Lestat's perspective yet, but do you think Lestat is in denial about his own unaddressed trauma? He doesn't have the same kind of shame Louis has around his sexuality or needing to feed on human blood, but there are clearly many issues that being a vampire has not healed even with time. I hope the show eventually dives more thoroughly into this because to me the fact that they both suffer from trauma that just goes unaddressed and they don't know how to communicate about it in a healthy way is their biggest issue as a couple.

On another note, if the show is able to continue all the way to adapting an ending for them like the one they have in Blood Communion, then Louis' turning will have even more layers as bookends for the series because they will have actually gotten to a place where Louis doesn't have to live with shame and is able to fully embrace himself and be all of the beautiful things he is for all eternity with Lestat. Becoming a vampire was not an instant fix, but the long, difficult and painful journey they both go through makes it possible.

Hey! Thank you so much! ❤️

Yeah, I agree with your thoughts. I believe Lestat genuinely meant his promises to Louis. And yes, Louis’ turning in the show was given more layers than in the book, and it was also given parallels to Lestat in that Louis’ human circumstances mirror Lestat’s human circumstances in several ways. On the surface, it appears they are opposites. However, for example, they were both forced to support their families with no thanks or appreciation. They both come from an abusive family (Lestat = physical whereas Louis = verbal). They both feel like outsiders who are forced to be things they are not due to societal limitations. They both struggle with the religious implications of their nature. Lestat’s speech to Louis could easily apply to Lestat himself, and I believe Lestat said those things, knowing Louis needed to hear them, because Lestat needed to hear them from someone (Louis) too. He also let Louis know that he was scared too of the love they feel for each other. It’s fatal. For both of them.

“This primitive country has picked you clean. It has shackled you in permanent exile. Every room you enter, every hat you are forced to wear — the stern landlord, the deferential businessman, the loyal son. All these roles you conform to and none of them your true nature. What rage you must feel as you choke on your sorrow. The first time I laid eyes on you, your beautiful face, I saw that sorrow. I did not know how it got there or why it was so voluminous. I can take away that sorrow, Louis…..I can swap this life of shame, swap it out for a dark gift and a power you can't begin to imagine. You just have to ask me for it. You just have to nod your beautiful head and say yes. I love you, Louis. You are loved. I send my love to you, and you send it back round to me. And this circle, this home we barely had a glimpse of, know it frightens me as much as it does you. Be my companion, Louis. Be all the beautiful things you are and be them without apology, for all eternity.”

There was a portion of that speech we didn’t get to hear, because Louis kept that part to himself. Notice though, like with everything else, it’s the most intimate part.

“It is difficult to explain how his words disarmed me. How efficiently succinct and impenetrable his argument was. All my conceptions, even my guilt and my wish to die seemed utterly unimportant, and I completely forgot myself and the barbaric scene that surrounded me. For the first time in my life, I was seen.”

Whatever Lestat said that we didn’t get to hear combined with him telling Louis that he loves him after seeing every piece of him is what pushed through Louis’ protective emotional walls. That is why Louis said yes. It was a moment for them both as Louis had been stripped bare, but so had Lestat. He saw Louis for who he was. He saw his strength, his willingness to do what must be done, his fire, his intelligence, his ability to endure. He saw into the depths of Louis’ soul, and he loves him for it. He found his companion heart. For Louis, it was an intimacy he had never experienced before. Lestat showed Louis what he was in that church by killing the priests, which is (imo) a metaphor for Lestat becoming Louis’ religion in that moment, and that encompasses a lot within the framework of their relationship as well, but I digress. Lestat put it all on the table at the risk of Louis rejecting him, and he’s amazed when Louis accepts him as evidenced by his awestruck expression.

Things just didn’t go like Lestat planned. They had seven years in which things were happy and running smoothly, but becoming a vampire didn’t change Louis’ skin color. He could kill the racists, like the esquire and the alderman, but he couldn’t kill an entire establishment. Lestat, on the other hand, didn’t understand this. He is naive and, at times, willfully ignorant. That’s one of the reasons why he was so proud/happy and then confused when Louis killed the alderman. Lestat believed that was Louis finally submitting to his nature, but it was really Louis grappling with the shit he’d dealt with his entire life. Lestat, as a vampire, could not understand why Louis couldn’t just let all that go. Prior to that, there was the issue with Antoinette/Jonah, which was never about actual infidelity.

The heart of the matter was rooted in Louis’ refusal to behave like a proper vampire and his inability to let go of his human entanglements. This is the aspect that’s glossed over in the tale as a whole, and it’s still an ongoing issue in Dubai despite Louis’ elaborate, performative feedings trying to deflect and prove otherwise. Louis rejects vampirism in the same beat as Lestat meeting Antoinette. Like I’ve said before, Antoinette was a direct result of Louis rejecting his nature and thereby rejecting Lestat. There’s also the fact that Louis struggling with being a vampire was a direct parallel to Nicki’s inability to thrive as a vampire, and Lestat knew where this would lead in the long-run. That’s why he tried so hard to play the tit-for-tat game with Louis for years in a desperate attempt to get Louis to break and properly feed. He couldn’t tell Louis the whys and hows, because that would’ve opened up the Marius/Armand/Nicki/Paris can of worms. Louis, however, is stubborn. He’s petty. He’s withholding. He punishes with silence and non-reactions, which many people mistake for passivity. There’s also the fact Louis is continuously in disbelief that Lestat loves him, and Louis later admits this as being one of the reasons why he withheld his affections from Lestat. Louis was never going to play that game, and it bit Lestat in the ass numerous times.

It all truly started falling apart when Louis finally realized he’s not human anymore, and he couldn’t pretend with his pseudo-vampire family anymore. The rite of passage, about which Lestat warned him in Episode 2. Claudia left him and Grace fully severed all ties with him. His grave was the literal symbol that Louis’ human life was dead. When Claudia came back, she wanted to replace Grace, which wasn’t going to work either. He told Claudia in Episode 6 that he could see their future of becoming like Lestat, which is another small setup for the fact that Louis and Claudia naively believe Lestat is the worst that could possibly be out there, but Lestat is soft in comparison to what is coming.

Louis went back to feeding on humans, trying to make a life again with his family, but he realized that is what it meant to be a vampire. They spend eternity grasping for something they can never truly have again despite the immortality and the power. It resulted in a severe mental crash, which Lestat had seen before with Nicki. This is what led to Lestat dragging Claudia back home. He knew what her leaving would do to Louis, and he couldn’t allow that to happen again, especially with Louis being in the mental state he was in at that point. Claudia being trapped is what led to the murder and her mistakenly thinking that Louis wanted to be free of Lestat too.

However, Louis’ rage and resentment were never actually about Lestat. Lestat’s actions with Antoinette compounded the situation, yes. Louis fully broke and fell into the dark grip of crippling depression when he realized Lestat didn’t kill Antoinette, but Louis also subconsciously knew why Lestat was doing it, and Louis wasn’t capable of doing anything about it. It was always Louis struggling against himself, not properly dealing with his trauma, and it was easier for him to let Claudia point the finger at Lestat, pretending it was all Lestat’s fault, than to admit to himself that he chose their life together due to the love he and Lestat share. He never wanted to leave Lestat.

Lestat’s inability to properly manage Louis’ trauma all goes back to Lestat’s own issues with abandonment and self-esteem. Lestat is light. He always had a need to be good and to do good. He always had an insatiable amount of hope and a belief in persevering against all odds. He truly does have a capacity for enduring. All his life, he’d been made to feel like this was something bad. This was only exacerbated by Nicki blaming Lestat for his own darkness and depression and using Lestat’s good deeds against him. Like I said, what Lestat told Louis in the church is what Lestat wanted to hear his entire life, because Lestat’s heart was hidden by what he was forced to be outwardly — a poverty-stricken son of an abusive blind and crippled marquis, forced into being a hunter to provide for his family, told to accept his lot in life as a nobody, ripped away from the monastery, kept uneducated and illiterate, ripped away from being an actor due to bringing the family shame, forced to hide his relationship with Nicki prior to running away to Paris, thrust into vampirism against his will, blamed by his first love for being full of light, hope, and strength.

Lestat carried all that trauma into his relationship with Louis. With Louis, Lestat tried and failed to snuff out his own light in fear of losing Louis like he lost Nicki. Lestat blamed himself for Nicki, because it’s what Nicki told him. It’s what he’d been told his entire life - his goodness was bad and it ruined the people he loved. He didn’t want Louis to suffer the same fate. You know how happy Lestat was at the beginning of the opera in Episode 2? That’s the real Lestat. You know how Louis was smiling at him and swooning over him in that moment? That’s the real Louis loving the real Lestat, because Louis actually loves Lestat’s light, and that goes right back to the book when he talks about all the times they’d go see Shakespeare plays, and Lestat would run around joyfully reciting the lines afterward, but Louis expressing his enjoyment of Lestat behaving in that manner would send Lestat into a spiral of self-doubt/loathing as the mere notion that Louis liked his company, liked being in the presence of his light, his light that he believed destroyed Nicki, always made Lestat retreat into himself, because of how he believed his light harmed the people he loves. This is touched upon in Episode 3. “I’m a lot. I’m not perfect.”

Lestat believed it was a miracle that Nicki ever loved him, but it was inevitable that Nicki would hate him, because Lestat sees himself as a worthless, unlovable monster who is too much. Louis said Lestat was “radiant” after he was turned, which was incorporated into Episode 1 with a tone of awestruck appreciation directly from the book. Nicki referred to Lestat’s light as “radiance”, but there was no appreciation. Lestat can’t see his own illumination, and he fears being too much for Louis, just like he was too much for Nicki. He sums himself up to Gabrielle right before she abandons him.

“You sense my loneliness,” I answered, “my bitterness at being shut out of life. My bitterness that I’m evil, that I don’t deserve to be loved and yet I need love hungrily. My horror that I can never reveal myself to mortals. But these things don’t stop me, Mother. I’m too strong for them to stop me. As you said yourself once, I am very good at being what I am. These things merely now and then make me suffer, that’s all.”

Lestat is aware of his issues, but he’s not aware of his value, which layers in beautifully with Episode 1 when Lestat asks Louis “Do you not know your value?” It’s also touched upon in Episode 6 when Lestat is telling Louis and Claudia about Magnus. “I thought for sure I’d be one of them, but instead he turned me into this.”

Against his will, Lestat is turned into this thing. It was another glimpse of Lestat’s self-loathing. This thing, this monster you hate so much, this monster that hurt you so badly, this monster that destroyed Nicki, this monster that doesn’t want to destroy you too, this monster you could never love.

Louis and Lestat are two sides of the same coin. Anne wrote them as such, because each represent one half of Anne herself. Contextually, they have seemingly different issues. But emotionally, it’s the same for both of them to an extent. What Lestat said to Gabrielle about himself could easily apply to Louis too. The difference is Lestat is aware of his trauma. He’s aware of when he fucks up, and he makes no excuses for it. He takes his punishment as he believes he deserves it. Louis, on the other hand, wants to justify his trauma and fuck-ups due to his religion and guilt, which Lestat experienced too when he wanted to be a priest, but was dragged back home to be his family’s prisoner, which thereby caused Lestat to lose his faith at the time, just like Louis’ faith was upended too.

Vampirism doesn’t free either of them from their trauma. It only adds to it. Their arcs parallel. They both have to learn to accept themselves and love themselves before they can fully give themselves to each other. That’s why the ending of Blood Communion is so poignant as it calls directly back to Queen Of The Damned in which Lestat asks Louis if he loves him after seeing every piece of him. In Blood Communion, it’s Louis acknowledging Lestat’s light and acknowledging what Nicki meant and continued to mean for Lestat. It’s Louis telling Lestat that he can love him for his light, his true self. He’s not too much for Louis.

“I have no gift for being miserable,” I said. “I know,” he said. He laughed. Such a human face. Such a lovely face.

Lestat meant what he said to Louis in that church. It was their wedding vows. They both just lacked the capacity to fully bring it to fruition at that point in their life together as they haven’t fully accepted themselves. Lestat accepts Louis. Louis accepts Lestat. Lestat can’t believe that until Lestat accepts Lestat, and Louis can’t believe that until Louis accepts Louis. That moment in the church — they are forever wed to each other. ❤️

[genderless-fuck-13]

I love Louis but he’s not physically abusive, he’s emotionally. And he’s so good at it he tailors it for both lovers.

Lestat: he shuts him out with books he refuses any affection or attention knowing it will get to Lestat.

Armand: throws his past a d abuse back at him constantly, dominates him, and belittles him like he’s a child.

Louis does this, yes.

However, I feel like the show is making a distinction in what Louis does vs. what Armand does.

Louis’ tactics are more human. They’re emotional. He knows where to wound with his mortal passion. Armand? It’s all very methodical and vampiric. It’s rooted in the fact he has no clue what real love is like vs. the fact that Louis has experienced real love. Does that make sense? It’s two different levels at play, yet you understand exactly why they each act in the manner they do, because we understand their backstories and life experiences.

And I’ll also say that, while Louis does treat Armand’s trauma as ammo (vs. how he treats Lestat’s trauma with precious care), Louis is not the one with the true power in that relationship. It’s a false sense of power to keep him placated. Yes, Armand is Louis’ creature and does what Louis “wants”, but don’t forget Armand also ignores Louis’ actual agency and takes it upon himself to enact certain things upon Louis, because Armand feels it’s warranted.

It’s a constant back and forth struggle with them. With Lestat? I would argue that Lestat truly never wanted any actual power over Louis and was simply at Louis’ feet with unconditional love and ready to do whatever Louis asked of him, whether it was good for Louis or not. If Louis wanted it? Louis got it (for example? Claudia). That’s not necessarily the case with Louis and Armand.

I don’t know. Just some food for thought.

[genderless-fuck-13]

I'm sure someone has probably already done this but it's nagging at me and I couldn't hear all the insults as they yelled at one another. (Bold are my emphasis because I am seated!) Specifically the parts about Paris and Marius. I'm not making any comments at the moment, just fact finding because this episode was brutal. Beautiful, but brutal.

Season 2 Episode 5

Louis: What? What?!

Armand: It's morning!

Louis: I lost time. Things got a little heated.

Armand: With a boy! Things got heated with a boy. I was at home picking lint off the sofa!

Louis: I said to join us!

Armand: The night's gone. The room's soiled and once again, I'm here with mop and mindlessness to clean it up.

Louis: So the room got dirty, so what? I'll clean it up.

Armand: No, I clean it up! You make the mess and I clean it up! Mark it on the calendar, align it with Ursa Major. Louis' tri-annual fսck off and find me with apologies to follow.

Louis: ( laughing ) I'm sorry.

Armand: Seek comfort in the arms of lowlifes and unfortunates, and broken children, fine.

Louis: Oh, fine! The fine that doesn't sound like…

But revealing our nature to a reporter you met in a bar ten hours ago? What if it was published?

Louis: I was having some fun!

Armand: You don't have enough to fear from Paris?

Louis: I was in the middle of ending things, when you…

Armand: You'd have been passed out on the floor next to him, Louis! Out on your feet from the drսg you stuffed him with!

Louis: Oh, this is boring! You're boring! You are so boring!

Armand: And here come the drսgs.

Louis: Colorless.

Armand: Up the fangs, down this road.

Louis: Flavorless. Dull! Dull! Dull!

Armand: Into the heart and off with the fingers, feet.

Louis: Dull nights, dull weeks!

Louis: And wallowing brain.

Louis: Dull months, dull as fսck! Suffocation by the world's softest, beige-est pillow! The ten hours I spent with that boy were more exciting, more fascinating, than decades with you! Oh, there it is! The half-blank, half-apocalyptic look! But what does it mean tonight, huh? Does he want to lick my boots or chop my hands off? Is it the gremlin or the good nurse tonight? Huh?

Armand: Okay. Okay, perhaps. But am I as boring as the blather committed onto the ferric tapes of your fascinating boy? "Oh, it's so, so hard to be me."

Louis: "Picking lint off the sofa?!"

Armand: "It's so hard to kill humans."

Armand: "I can feel their feelings as I drain them."

Louis: You sat on your hands and put your ear to the wind.

Armand: "Everyone I know wrongs me."

Louis: Okay. Okay, let's wake the boy up and let's try you. "I'm the vampire Armand and my daddy vampire groomed me into a little bitch."

Armand: "My brother, he tossed himself off a roof!"

Louis: "Vampires who murdered my daddy made me pretend I didn't have a dіck for 240 years."

Armand: "My sister, she buried me alive.” My daughter was my sister was my throw pillow. “Well, he wouldn't look at me kindly.” "Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat. Lestat."

Louis: I talked shit about him the whole time. So what?!

Armand: The name!! The name! Unuttered in our home for 23 years, said over and over again until it was pounding in my brain like a hammer.

Louis: Our problems aren't about him.

Armand: And you threw her name around just for cover, but it always circled back to him.

Louis: I loved her.

Armand: But she didn't love you. Not like he did, not like I have.

Louis: ( softly ) I know. I know! Yes! I know. ( softly ) Thank you for saying it. It's all creeping back. Paris and the, uh, what, what, what? But there's… all of it coming back. There's, uh, Paris. Paris. Can you hear that? Can you hear that, hm? Can you hear her? She's calling me.

Transcript (with some corrections) from TV Show Transcripts

[genderless-fuck-13]

Since the timeline with the book and movie deviate so much......the real question of this episode (for me) is why Lestat didn't just come find Louis in person after that psychic link in 1973. Like, clearly he's not still 'sleeping.'

Maybe he grew as a person and decided to respect the boundary of Armand and Louis' relationship.

No but seriously, tho...I wonder what he's doing between 1973 and 2024. Unless they can talk to each other in their sleep, still???

[genderless-fuck-13]

Btw sort of noticed how Louis calmed a little bit when he heard Mon Cher and I am going to launch myself off my roof now.

[genderless-fuck-13]

When they're fighting, Louis and Armand know exactly where to hurt each other the most. They can jab at each other about multiple painful memories they've suffered, that's fine, but there's one thing that crumples each of them and they both use it here. For Armand, you can see it when he looks genuinely hurt and cuts off the moment Louis says "dull nights, dull months, dull decades" (aka their entire relationship never stood a chance when compared to what Louis and Lestat had), that his entire being is nothing (he's the void, after all), which then moves to a murderous expression when Louis says that a 20 year-old human can provide more entertainment than he ever could, which then moves to barely holding back tears when Louis asks, "Is it the gremlin or the wet nurse tonight?"

For Louis, though, it's Claudia. And it will always be Claudia. Louis could hold his own right up until the moment Armand masterfully threw out the "and you threw out her name just for cover but it always circled back to him", and, "but she didn't love you, not like I do!" (the latter being classic abuser language), and it's enough to make Louis spiral into a psychotic episode that leads him to try and commit suicide. Louis knows Armand's largest weak points, but Armand can still recover. Louis, however, cannot. Because while Armand's greatest insecurity is himself, he's never loved and failed another like Louis did, because he, as someone long since detached from humanity, supposedly can no longer make that type of connection with anyone.

And while Louis is blindly running towards "Claudia's voice", Armand pauses, looking deeply ashamed of using that against him, but still pauses all the same. One has to wonder, was the pause out of shock at being that cruel, or was it from still needing a moment to nurse those lingering feelings of anger at the things Louis said to him? Or, was it because he knew by waiting, Louis would get injured, and would have no choice but to depend on him again?

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Armand when he came home as a fashion icon to Daniel and Louis and realized that everything was actually not ok

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[Claudia] is Louis' Achilles heel. Louis can talk about Lestat, and he can feel this complex range of love and hate and regret and excitement, and those things can also be contained. But I think with Claudia, it's quite volatile, because the wounds are still open, even after all this time. For Daniel to start talking about Claudia, and to visit Louis with that, without Louis being able to prepare it beforehand, [he] can throw things back at him, but Daniel can very easily be like, 'Claudia was unhappy and it was your fault.' And that could shatter him. That could immediately take him out.

Jacob Anderson - The Best Quotes From the Interview with the Vampire Cast We Couldn't Fit in Our Cover Story (TV Guide)

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songs with lyrics that in my opinion fits very well on the Louis/Armand/Daniel situation:

Make Up Your Mind - Florence and The Machine

Linger - The Cranberries

Somebody Else - The 1975

Out Of Touch - Daryl Hall & John Oates

The Chain - Fleetwood Mac

Cocoon - Catfish and The Bottlemen

Thin White Lies - 5sos

Be My Mistake - The 1975

Smile On My Face - EXO

[genderless-fuck-13]

So one thing I've been thinking about a lot lately is the fact that everyone of those characters is a trauma victim/ survivors. In the books they're all younger and have 0 coping skills or ways to process it..it's quiet sad to be honest.

That's one of the reasons these adaptations drive me crazy..esp with aging up these characters by quiet a bit sometimes.

Lestat had a terrible childhood and went though horrid abuse at the hands of his father and brothers. Then when he thought he escaped to Paris Magnus kidnaps him and rapes and tortues him for a week straight before turning him against his will.

Louis had to be the breadwinner of his home after his father died and taking what little money was left after his dad died and was pigeonholed (because of his race) to do the only business, which I feel he despised, to take care of his family. Still it wasn't enough to get respect from them. Plus having your brother kill himself right in front of you. And blamed for it. On top of that being queer. All this on top of living in the Jim Crow South.

Claudia being unwanted by her family. And abused to almost dying in a fire. Then turned into a vampire as a child. And again trying to grow up in the Jim Crow South being a young black lady. Also being raped and tortured by Bruce. As well as dealing with a very toxic family life. And never feeling important to anyone.

And Armand having his own parents selling him into slavery.. and becoming a sex slave and working at a brothel. Then think he was being saved by Marius..only not.. then when he falls in love with people they don't fall in love with him.

It makes sense why these characters act as they do. They're all manipulating and scared really. None of them really had an opportunity to grow up. It's just sad to think about sometimes.

[genderless-fuck-13]

i think at this point it would have been kinder to just shoot armand in the head at point blank range. jesus

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"Louis acting like a pimp to Armand" And what is a pimp exactly? Quickly. And, oh so sexual trauma survivors can't engage in kink now without it being all about that? Pet names? They can't be submissive anymore? Consensually? Sexually healthy? Be serious. I'd hardly say there's much power difference between them during all this anyway, except that Louis is freer than Armand and it's been putting a strain on their relationship. Louis wants more from Armand, and less of this 'being his past' for them both, and so helping Armand with this could fix that. It's healthy to want to help your partners get out of a rough patch?

I mean, the whole exchange was very clearly set up as a "I want to help you" after such a great moment of vulnerability Louis feels just how much Armand is desperate for it. Louis called Armand so they could work out a plan together.

And the bit with the umbrella was Louis' way of asking 'are you willing to listen to me?' and Armand said yes by unfolding it. Louis goes on and explains, Armand is allowed to argue against it, but Louis makes his point. And then he gives Armand a way to make his own choice in it too. Armand's already decided 'I want you, more than anything else in the world', but Louis still asks after if he's sure of his choice, and with a name, Arun, that is the one of his fullest agency, running the point home. Honoring the situation Armand calls Louis Maitre - as a way of being like 'I'll do as you've said then'. To make this work he's going to have to give Louis some of the control, yes. But it's the first time such a role is ever established, and it was his choice to do it. So so what if they do it in a very suggestive way? They can't like doing that? I think it's them having fun.

I struggle to find how Louis is being overly domineering here when really he's giving and offering Armand the most agency he's ever had. Same with finding it manipulative. The manipulation was more earlier in the episode I think, when he was stringing him along, giving mixed signals. He's no longer toying with him like that. Louis might be pushing Armand, leading him on to make a decision, but he doesn't mean bad by it.

But back to this pimp thing. I find it frankly offensive that this is where people are going with this. I get it, but to run with it being the case is, on many levels, wrong.

Louis told us episode 1 this was the only sustainable line of work to support his family and keep their standing, at the time. It was never his choice to be doing this either but his blackness allowed no other options. He did what he did so his family could stay in that house and maintain all their same comforts. It gave him privileges most black men didn't have at the time that he wanted to maintain and even have more of. Anyway, it doesn't and had never defined him the way 'being good at running things' had. And in that case he just likes having that kind of control where he can get it, which makes sense.

The world is what placed that kind of role onto him of what he was allowed to be able to run, not himself. And on that he actually treated the sex workers he employed well and respected them enough to give them more opportunity. He recognizes they don't have much in the way of options either.

Louis employed sex workers, yes, but he didn't subject them to abuse. He didn't oversee things in a way that would go against their consent (see; episode 1 again). Sometimes a job is just a job. And Sex work is work.

Armand's particular past with sexual abuses may strike a particular cord with Louis, given all that, but the very last thing either is thinking is that Louis' pimping Armand out here. This is merely their decision as companions, and had nothing to with with adding another line in a laundry list of selling Armands body out to people at the command of someone else. Armand rescinds some of his control to Louis' wishes, because he wants him, and he trusts him, that's all.

If you aren't allowing Armand that choice, and are doubtful it's fully his, you're putting him right back in the box of being defined by his abuses. Putting him back into that space where he isn't given any agency over what he does.

[genderless-fuck-13]

An old woman will arrive at the station at 2:47 AM, she will not have enough money to pay the fare, let her in anyway. She will then board an unscheduled train at 3:00 AM. DO NOT ATTEMPT TO TURN HER AWAY UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES.

[genderless-fuck-13]

Has someone written the fic where Santiago and Claudia do become allies, realize Armand and Louis suck and will get them killed and fake their deaths so they can run together and be The Murder Family (Stage Version)? They could even take Madelaine.

[genderless-fuck-13]

Louis has learned to tune out their bickering

[genderless-fuck-13]

Thinking about Art and Artists and Artistry and Armand in Interview with the Vampire

thinking about how Lestat didn't give a fuck about humans - unless they were musicians - and then he would send them money, drinks, make sure they were remembered, would express himself through music and lyrics, how the most important things he ever did were to write and record songs, and later, he'd become a rock star - the only thing that lasts for him, besides love, is music

thinking about louis, chasing photography, chasing light, chasing moments, feeling like a failure, but desperately needing people to know exactly how good he wasn't, but caring, even 70 years later, about the truth about his art, even if it was amatuer artistry. who bemoans that he cannot engage with his subjects the way the masters do because he ends up eating them, but still takes pictures none the less. thinking about how much he wished he could have lestat's opinion on his work.

thinking about claudia, who was a diarist. who spent decades developing her own specific style of prose. who crossed the eastern front of wwii, writing all the while. who in defiance of the third law, knowing it could get her killed, still kept writing because the words and the pen were a part of her.

thinking about madeline and how making dresses is a form of artistry too. thinking about how claudia always goes to her for her work, specifically. thinking about how her work was the first thing that made claudia see her.

thinking about santiago, who is the backbone of the theatre de vampires despite the fact that he is not the leader of the coven because he is a true actor. thinking about how even his conversation style is a performance. thinking about how he was cruel to louis when he mimicked him but he could only do that because he was so skilled at his craft. thinking about how he doesn't have to put any effort into the performance when he's hypnotizing humans - who could enthrall them, but does, because he's an actor, he always has been, and he loves it, he loves the art of acting, and so he finds new elements of the performance every night, because he is a thespian and theater is his art. thinking about how he wants to own his art but feels like he has to fight armand for it, when armand doesn't even want it.

thinking about daniel. who is not just a writer but an investigative journalist - which is an artform which requires not just writing but engagement with a subject that is mutual. thinking about how there has to be intimacy for his artform to be executed. thinking about how armand, from the first episode, resisted daniel's executing his art, his way. thinking about how despite that, armand cannot stay away.

thinking about armand. who hasn't been painted in 400 years and who has not painted either. thinking about how he is in charge of the theatre de vampires but does not participate in the artistry of it. thinking about how he goes to museums and walks the streets of paris but doesn't engage with the beauty. thinking about how owns a bacon triptich but does not seem to enjoy it. thinking about how he, of all the vampires, considers being a vampire something he would not do to his worst enemy.

thinking about how all vampires are drawn to art and artists. Because when you live forever, what is there besides people and the art people make?

thinking about how armand appears to have been cut off from art for a very long time. because of his trafficking. because of marius. because of lestat. thinking about how people are what cut him off and because of who he is, it is going to take a person to bring him back. if the show is smart, the person should be himself, independently, becoming whole and i sincerely hope that's what the interview is going to do for armand.