girllovver

[girllovver]

i have this fantasy; i'm somewhere with a grey, cloudy sky. no light peaks through the thick layer but i can tell that it hadn't been day time for hours. i'm in the middle of a field with grass and weeds reaching up my shins to the bottoms of my kneecaps, roughly hitting against my skin from the heavy breeze along with my steps forward. ahead of me is only twenty meters of field left. then, it is only the roaring ocean. for miles and miles. its the only thing i'm able to see as i continue walking forward through the grass. just as my sight, it was the only thing i could hear. below me, all around the cliffside i had found myself place upon, violent crashing of waves sounded on the large jagged rocks in the bay of the cliff. as i got closer water splashed my face. my hair had already begun to curl up and cling to my face from the sticky, salt air. the sounds of the waves seemed to be amplified like an echo from all of the empty space around. my heart started to beat along with every thrash of water, my breath adapting to the forceful winds blowing. i closed my eyes and stretched out my arms. i'd fallen to the ocean's power. her beauty, her might, her song, her wildness. her freedom. the wind jostled me around as i looked out back to the water. the dark blue velvet stared back at me with the only thing i could recognize as my own reflection. we were one. of course we were the same. the ferocity so quickly unleashed, the deep areas of unsearched material. standing on the edge, above me the clouds began to subside in a small area. shining beautiful moonlight down to the water right below me, the water sparkled blue just like my eyes had when it was too sunny out. i took a step closer and began falling into my eyes. for a second flying through the air, i couldn't breathe the blowing winds anymore. my heart wasn't beating along with the water. but as i came in contact with the surface, i had been enveloped by my life source. i'd been swallowed right up by myself, where i always belonged. i was back from the little drop i was, into the ocean. i was now another wave on a shore. i have returned to myself to now begin a journey. tearing through the water's surface i looked out, prepared to sail looking for something i can't yet describe. a shock of cold went through my body piercing to my bones, fully awakening me to my surroundings. the moon seemed to shift it's position, pointing forward as a guiding light. i began to swim in the moon beams, ignored my chattering teeth, and set off to find something much greater than myself.

1) writer in the dark: lorde

2) feels like: gracie abrams

3) guilty as sin?: taylor swift

4) sullen girl: fiona apple

5) lacy: olivia rodrigo

6) killer: phoebe bridgers

7) seven: taylor swift

8) august: taylor swift

9) cardigan: taylor swift

10) funeral: phoebe bridgers

11) my tears ricochet: taylor swift

12) hoax: taylor swift

13) liability: lorde

1) exile: taylor swift, bon iver

2) full machine: gracie abrams

3) dealer: lana del rey, the last shadow puppets

4) i hate it here: taylor swift

5) amelie: gracie abrams

6) the archer: taylor swift

7) coney island: taylor swift, the national

8) that's so true: gracie abrams

9) unsteady: gracie abrams

10) mess it up: gracie abrams

11) live ridden: fiona apple

12) waiting room: phoebe bridgers

13) evermore: taylor swift, bon iver