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Intermittent Explosive Disorder (IED)

By: Marianne Lorraine G. Pareñas

Sometimes I think of myself as a completely abnormal person. It's no joke that there are IEDs, it's a complete mess. Just one mistake and I will explode like dynamite. A simple mistake can cause a very large explosion and harm others, which I don't want. When I was a kid, I beat up a classmate just because he didn't ask permission to borrow a pencil. I was punished but I deserved it. Even now, I don't know why I can't control my anger or how I can control it. Maybe it's better to avoid everyone and be alone so I don't hurt anyone. Because I know that when I get angry, I can't control it and say a lot of hurtful words. Yesterday, during the search for Mr. and Mrs.Pharmacy, it was a disaster. I yelled at my classmates who made many mistakes and other classmates who didn't support me.I knew I was wrong, but I still sincerely apologized to them because it was completely unacceptable. It gives the impression that I have no right and don't value their efforts. Somehow I am constantly introspecting because as an adult it is important to know every mistake and change for the better. I may have a disability, but that doesn't mean I'm not a good person, I'm just a woman with mental health issues and trying my best to better myself. That means there is.

That's all.

I hope you all enjoy my blog.