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feel, all the time, like a garbage fire.

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Me every morning :)

Bojack Horseman

Season 4, Episode 6 : Stupid Piece of Shit

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Dear diary...

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

I will never be enough.

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But my sleep is just full of nightmares and flashbacks.

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Dear diary...

Every day that passes is just another battle against myself...

I'm tired...

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I hope my absence brings you the peace that my love couldn’t

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Dear diary...

The fact that I'm still "alive" in 2024 just feels like a huge mistake...

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🎶 Where were you when everything was falling apart? 🎶

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Maya C. Popa, from Wound is the Origin of Wonder: Poems: “Duress”

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I'm proud of you for making it this far.

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I made a mood-board for 2025 :) It’s basically a gist of my goals for the new year.

I want to organize and expand my physical media collection. A handful of some of my favorite TV shows and movies have been pulled from all streaming platforms, so I decided to start a little collection of some of my all-time favorites and comfort picks.

Driving—I want to drive more. Just get on the road, do some exploring, listen to music.

Clean, organize and really hone in on my wardrobe. I need to start putting in more work on how I present myself.

I had a fish tank up until three years before my depression started getting really bad. Hopefully, now that I’ve started taking steps to address my issues, I’ll find myself in a position to properly care for and maintain a fish tank.

I live in a big, beautiful city, one of my favorite places on Earth. Over the last couple of years I started really isolating myself and retreating from my surroundings. It’s gotten to the point where the city, especially at night, no longer calls to me like it used to. I can still feel that pull, though, so I’m going to make an effort to rekindle this relationship. I love my city, I really do <3

Writing. A few months ago, I found an old journal from when I was like, seven years old, where I wrote my first fanfic! A Bleach fanfic! It’s been years since I’ve taken the time to sit down and seriously write, but I managed to push out a 47k fanfic for one of my favorite ships. I really enjoyed the experience overall, so I plan on giving it another go. (If the fandom dread doesn’t get to me, that is 😬)

I didn’t study web design nor did I ever picture myself working in web design, but your girl needed a job and took the first offer. I’m blessed, though. It’s a good job and I like my coworkers (even though I’m at the mercy of the government as it’s a public sector job and with the upcoming administration….yikes), and it turns out that I actually like web design so I want to try my hand at working on original designs, even if they’re just mock-ups.

The quote!! That’s basically my life at this point. And I think that’s going to remain true until I die 🙃

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