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amphetamines, effexor and bud all up in my system havin a party
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i can’t believe i am just going to live until i die. this is all so embarrassing
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I’m tired of myself again. I can’t figure out a balance in life. I am unhappy feeling so alone. I wish I knew what made me undesirable to be around. ik obviously from this page theres many clues as to why but i’m not like that irl. I just want to be good enough for someone to be around
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I have never felt so defeated. I never felt worthless. I never wanted to hurt someone so much in my life. I never want to feel this way again.
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Aeschylus’ The Suppliant Maidens (tr. Seth G. Benardete)
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i keep going back and forth between feeling like nothing will come between me and my partner and feeling like I already lost them and that they just feel bad because i’m an unstable person/ I can’t help but to feel I’m holding them back and that I’m an embarrassment to them. I feel like someone could do better and are better than me. I want nothing more than for them to have to world and to be happy and if that’s without me i dont even think id blame them. I’d simply do anything for them. there are times i feel like maybe there is someone else on their mind, but would I even leave if its true? I dont think I could ever love again.
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i dont like being so possessive, it drives me fucking insane, I want to be normal and relax and let my s/o chill and do whatever, but my brain gets fuzzy and angry when ppl msg her (not everyone obviously) but i feel like i’ll be abandoned befause someone is better than me, i feel unreasonable and cannot control how angry i feel towards people
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I feel like something is going to destroy my world soon. I think im going to get hurt really badly and I dont think i will recover. I feel so alone
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