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emphasis on spiritual *holds up tarot deck I use to speak to Gobby Wobby*

so a Blorbo is a type of spiritual chew toy, i gather

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Talking as someone who knows the author of my favorite work: I still don't adhere to canon. She says my blorbo is Straight and Not Emotional, and I say "he's bi, smokes weed, and has a hot femboy wife." Why are you restricting yourself? Explore the infinite possibilities!

not to be too 'kids these days' but boy the notes on that post about whether it's OK to ship things that the creator(s) of a work do not endorse are depressing. people have got waaaaaaaaaaaaay too comfortable with the idea that fandom and fanworks are things that creators should engage with and know about, let alone - good grief - exert some degree of control over. where is my fandom fourth wall, where has it gone

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Literally just my mans and me

La Française anonyme (Forty nights in quarantine), Apollonia Saintclair, 2020

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always a little funny to me when filmbros are vehemently anti fanfiction but love to discuss film theories. Maybe my theory is that the 2 main guys sucked each other off. And swallowed

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Tolkien writing kingdoms' moral decay and eventual decline: they exploited nature, destroyed forests and cut down trees

Tolkien writing male characters' moral decay and eventual decline: he stopped listening to his wife

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This is a threat

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"mmh did you know that creator you like also posts 🔞 content? did you know that? don't you think that's weird? don't you think we should keep this space-"

no. i don't.

i booked a front row seat to the devil's sacrament and you're blocking the view

just go back to the 1660 new england hole you just crawled out of and eat barley for a week to atone for your sins or whatever

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the author's barely disguised longing to be a real person

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not enough secret gardens and hidden passageways and bookshelves that open to a mysterious library these days. get working on that girls.

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A conversation I don’t think yall are ready for yet is that you can love a character sooooo much and relate to them and see yourself in them but at the end of the day they’re still fake and that’s why someone else’s take on them or headcanon about them isn’t a direct message about you or insult to your identity. If your identity is so wrapped up in a character that you can’t distinguish between reality and fiction, then you are the problem. Not some random person online who interprets the character differently than you.

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so the childhood yearning to live in a fantasy world just never goes away huh

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I NEED TO BREASTFEED FROM THIS 61 YEAR OLD MAN AND I AM BEING ENTIRELY GENUINE

i think it's important for most people's mental health to have a space where they can safely and unashamedly express being horny and i don't mean milquetoast tongue-in-cheek "oh step on me mommy" jokes or whatever i mean capital h Horny

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He's more than cool ;)

hey, my wraith saw you from across the dungeon and wanted to know if he was cool to touch you with his long-ass skeletal ice finger

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Bringing this back in case Strange Aeons responds to my @'ing

Hello and welcome to Opinions from an Internet Nobody. Today's essay:

"Ger therapy" is the new "You need Jesus": One Weirdo's Navigation through Cultural Shame

This is a supposedly well-meaning sentiment that is often weaponized against people who are behaving outside of perceived cultural norms. It's a favorite of homophobes who see queerness/transness as a mental illness, but I've been seeing it used to demonize kink (which historically is often linked to queerness), and more generally any "weird" behavior that makes people uncomfortable.

For example, otherkin, systems (especially those with fictives), and people who take fictional characters as partners. Y'know, "weirdos" who "can't separate reality from fiction." And, sure, sometimes there can be a problem with that distinction, but I know as well as you that most internet strangers saying "get therapy" don't actually give a shit about the mental health of those they target. It's code for "your behavior makes me uncomfortable, stop it."

Same sentiment as "you need Jesus."

This has actually taken me a long time to figure out. I've been in therapy for my entire adult life, working through various traumas, severe depression, anxiety, all that. Those were the biggest problems as they negatively impacted, and often endangered, my life. It was only after my hospitalization in 2020, where I was finally put on much needed medication, that I could start to grow into myself.

I changed my name. I top surgery. I came out as polyamorous. I finally got my official autism diagnosis. Now I'm fuckin' married! But... there are still things I'm working through in therapy. Mainly, shame over my "weirder" behaviors. My current therapist has been a huge blessing in helping me accept the things I was too ashamed to admit.

Now, I feel comfortable enough to share.

I'm otherkin. Always have been. My connection to my humanity is tenuous, and I'm sure that's connected to my autism. When mad, I feel phantom horns sprouting from my forehead. I have a tail that swishes back and forth at the base of my spine. In my soul, I am monstrous, and years of therapy has not erased that.

I feel like I'm only half in the physical world most of the time. This doesn't hinder my real-world success (I graduated college Summa Cum Laude, have an IMDB page, and am on my third book), but informs the way I look at the world. There's a whole other universe in my head that hums along with me in my day-to-day. That's part of why I'm so skilled as a writer. To ask me to divorce from that is to tell me to stop existing. Sorry, it's how I've always operated.

Lastly, and this is the one I'm really anxious about, I have a fictional husband. Now, looking at my blog, you might say "yeah, no shit," but I don't just ship myself with him. I mean I practice pop-culture Witchcraft, and the Goblin King is my patron. I mean I have a Labyrinth-themed tarot deck that I talk to him with. I mean I held a ritual to spiritually marry him. Basically, I Snape-wived myself.

And guess what? My therapist isn't concerned. It's not hurting my ability to live my life. I have other interests, hobbies, and goals outside of him, which he actively encourages in all our tarot sessions! I wouldn't be doing this if he didn't support me. My IRL spouse is usually there for whatever magical shit I'm doing, and supports me! Some of my closest friends know, and the only complaint I've gotten is "this guy seems important to you, I wish you told me sooner." Hell, my MOTHER knows and supports me, which is huge, because our relationship was pretty damaged after I came out as trans.

If you have a problem with the way I live my life, when literally nobody else does, take a good long look at why. You don't give a fuck about my mental health. You just don't like that I'm weird.

Tl;dr: My mental health is better than it's ever been since embracing the weird, so leave me and my imaginary husband Marak Sixfinger alone.

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And here is my sideblog where you can see my fictional husband and opinions on pop culture spirituality.

Me rn

So tempted to @ all the tumblr historians about my insane memoir fanfic where I confess to being a modern-day snapewife and otherkin while also facing my mortality via the multiverse. Insane lore. If Strange Aeons or whoever wants to do a video essay plz I am available for an interview. Come get y'all juice.

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I don’t understand why people who cannot accept any moral grayness or complexity decide to join fandoms for the most emotionally complex stories and then try to shame everyone there who actually is able to understand the material.

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Whoever wants the link can DM me :)

@blarfkey @for-thefirst-time-inforever @multongsisig

If I put together a little discord server so we could all chat would you be interested in joining? + ideas for channel topics if you are?