goldilockswrites

[goldilockswrites]

hi everyone! @idyllicbutterfly here. it feels rather weird to be writing on here again, but i have noticed quite an influx of asks in my inbox and wanted to clear some stuff up. i started this blog a while ago due to a plethora of reasons, most notably to honour my favourite (at the time) band maneskin. but it wasn't just that - i was seeking refuge from loneliness, friendship, love, a space where i can share my writing and vent. for quite some time this space was a safe space for me. but people change and grow up, and they need to spread their wings and explore the opportunities the beyond has to offer. in my case this 'flight' wasn't necessarily voluntary, but it was very much needed. as i have mentioned in my previous post, i have grown so much and i wish i could go back in time to that little girl (she would hate me if she heard me calling her that in public), who started this blog and endured the slew of virtual abuse when everything fell apart and tell her 'all will be well.' i became a national champion in english and writing. my poetry and stories have been featured in journals across the US, Canada and the UK. in a blink i was 16 and holding an anthology published thousands of kilometres away from my hometown. and now i am 18 - the poetry i wrote in my mother tongue is gracing the pages of one of the most renowned bulgarian literary journals, i have read on countless stages and now i am officially a journalist for a media that protects the rights of women in my home country. i have graduated, i am going to uni to study business and journalism as i have always dreamt of doing... this isn't meant to be some great fuck you, though it could be. this is, i guess, a thank you to everyone who has read my fanfics and perhaps enjoyed them, saw themselves in them. it was really you, who first gave me the freedom to find my voice, who gave me my wings and for that i am eternally grateful. <3 and since there are so many of you, i feel i need to take some responsibility and answer my most asked questions: 1. what happened to @idyllicbutterfly? this blog's original name was idyllicbutterfly, but mid-2024, i decided i didn't want it to carry that name anymore. idyllicbutterfly has already served its purpose - i broke out of my cocon and flew out into the real world. the blog that currently holds this name is also mine and though empty it is sort of a memorial, i guess, of who i used to be. 2. what happened to the fics? similarly, mid-2024, i also decided i don't wish to have my fics up online anymore so i have archived them all. they can be found through other blogs in the maneskin community who have reblogged them or linked them somehow. 3. why did you disappear? this is a question that has popped up often. it is hard to explain, but let's say that not everything is as it seems - basically once upon a time, the maneskin fandom was a very weird, power-trippy place and people just formed very weird 'relationships' with others in the fandom without ever talking to us/knowing us, so when a bit of a falling out happened everyone jumped on me, bc they though i was 'guilty' for some reason and started sending me terrible messages, so i decided to remove myself from this community. 4. where can we find you today? i am active here from time to time. i have recently made a new blog where it would be easier to reach me. it is @honeylives i am also active on insta on https://www.instagram.com/evaaxellemoller_/

[goldilockswrites]

omg, welcome back! how have you been? x

Hii!

I've been good! Had the time of my life, while off here (as cruel as that sounds, I don't care <3).

I officially became a published author (you can get the anthology my pieces are featured in here or just look up "Axelle Dean King" online). I've made a lot of new real friends, bleached my hair, got my belly pierced.

I am not going to lie, when I first had to take a break from Tumblr, it wasn't necessarily voluntary and was really hard. I was just a 16-year-old kid and I had made a lot of connections here and met a great deal of people I considered friends. It was a complicated process, working with my therapist and realising that I was just used as a bin for emotional rubbish, but I pushed through and ended up on top of all the bullshit.

As mean as it sounds, I did what it takes to recover, got my shit together, and now... Well, let's just say, I've gone farther than those people, proving that being a phoney is NEVER going to get you anywhere! <3

Anyway, I am going to sign off, before I say something I shouldn't. (I definitely will say it, but that is a post for another time.)

Love ya, Axey <3

[goldilockswrites]

I'm not saying she deserved it, but I'm saying God's timing is always right.

[goldilockswrites]

He is literally so stunning! 🥺❤️

[goldilockswrites]

The Dying Saint Sebastian

- François-Xavier Fabre, 1789

[goldilockswrites]

Melancholy II, Edvard Munch, 1898.

[goldilockswrites]

them. them. they make me so happy i love them 🖤

duffs arm around stevens shoulder and stevens arm around duffs waist 🫶🫶🫶🫶

[goldilockswrites]

my blonde babygirls

[goldilockswrites]

RIP Vivienne Westwood (8 April 1941 – 29 December 2022)

[goldilockswrites]

[goldilockswrites]

[goldilockswrites]

So, I’ve been pulled over a few times in my life. Not many, but a few. And I’ve also been in a couple of cars that got pulled over. And let me tell you, if you were actually doing something wrong, the officer doesn’t make any small talk, just straight into “I clocked you doing 70 in a 55.” The only time I’ve ever gotten the “do you know why I pulled you over?” was the time when I wasn’t doing anything wrong, and I got let go even though he insisted to the end that I was doing 87 in a 70 (white privilege at work).

“Do you know why I pulled you over?” is a trap. It means there’s a good chance the officer doesn’t actually have a good reason to ticket you, and is trying to get you to waive your 5th Amendment rights and incriminate yourself. If you make a guess, that’s a confession of guilt.

But there’s another trap, that I’ve heard of but haven’t yet experienced. It’s “do you know how fast you were going?” With that one, they’re hoping you’ll say no, because then they can name whatever speed they want – you just said you didn’t know how fast you were going, if you deny the speed they name then you’re lying to them.

[goldilockswrites]

AAAAH my favorites!

Van Gogh And His Sunflowers by terry wei

[goldilockswrites]

I'm p good thanks <3

Glad to hear that! <3

P.S. I hope you don't mind the liberty I took in naming you my <3 anon!

[goldilockswrites]

loneliness becomes an acid that eats away at you

Haruki Murakami, Sergey Tutunov, Pablo Picasso, Maurice Pirenne, Yvan Favre, George Pratt, Marie Muravski, Aaron Wiesenfeld

buy me a coffee

[goldilockswrites]

~ Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

[goldilockswrites]

Are you okay? <3

I'm fine! What about you, Nonnie?