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google1000 · 9 hours
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John: Why are girls allowed to say girlfriend to refer to their platonic friends?
*The 100 nodding along, not paying attention*
Curt, waiting for him to say something weird:.....
John: But when I say this is my boytoy malewife twink Buck, suddenly I'M the weirdo
The 100:.....*Horrified*
Curt: There it is
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google1000 · 21 hours
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Bucky: Curt, where are you exactly? Curtis: I got lost. Bucky: No shit Sherlock, but can you tell me maybe a street name? Curtis: I‘m by a cloud...uh...looks like a lion. Bucky: I need you to be more specific. Curtis: Simba.
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google1000 · 2 days
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John: *clenching his fists* Fight me!
Random soldier: ....
Gale, standing behind him: *mouthes* Do not
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google1000 · 4 days
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Imagine Charlie taking you to his family’s home for hols.
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Charlie X Reader
When Charlie had told you exactly how many Weasley’s stayed under one roof during hols, you decided to rent a room in muggle London closest to the Leaky Cauldron. And wanting to let his brothers, sister, and their spouses to have as much room as possible, Charlie decided to stay with you.
You had been fretting for the passed hour to decide on what outfit to wear while Charlie flicked on and off every light switch he could find, he still marveling at what muggles were capable of.
“I don’t know why you’re so amused by electricity,” you huff, walking around in nothing but one of his shirts and underwear. “One of the bars we floo to is in a muggle village that I’m pretty sure you chased me through when I got drunk and unruly. You’ve played with electricity before, Weasley.”
Keep reading
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google1000 · 4 days
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John, at Curt’s funeral: I need a moment alone with him
Everyone else at the funeral: Of course. *leaves*
John, leaning over Curt’s coffin: Okay, listen here you little shit. I know you’re not dead
Curt, sitting up in the coffin: Yeah, no shit
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google1000 · 5 days
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John: Do you think you could take me?
Gale, excited: Yes
John: ....
Gale: Oh you mean fight-
Gale: ....Also yes
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google1000 · 6 days
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Crosby: WHAT’S YOUR TYPE
Bucky, bleeding: blond, blue eyes, tall, pretty lips--
Crosby, desperately: YOUR BLOOD TYPE
Bucky: Oh! B positive.
Crosby: I'M TRYING TO, BUT YOU'RE BLEEDING A LOT
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google1000 · 7 days
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Bucky: i've been feeling real sick in the mornings lately.
Curt: Maybe you're pregnant.
Bucky: You're right!
Douglas: Who's the father?
Rosie: Major Cleven obviously.
Kidd: I don't know what's worse Curt for suggesting that, Bucky for believing that, Douglas and Rosie for enabling it, or me for almost having a heart attack.
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google1000 · 8 days
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Summary: Of course Bob has a family. It was obvious. Phoenix knew that that and did everything in her power to ensure he got back to them. So, she had to meet his wife and son.
A trip to the Hard Deck gives his son a new fascination and his wife a chance to reconnect with an old college...friend? Boyfriend? Whatever, it doesn't annoy Bob at all.
Tags: Family Fluff, Domestic Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Parenthood, Established Relationship, Past Relationship(s), Hint of Jealousy, Spanking
Song Recommendation: Need You Here by I DON'T KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME
Top Gun: Maverick, Robert "Bob" Floyd Masterlist - here
└─────── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───────┘
Phoenix knew Bob had a family. He hadn't said anything but she knew. His lockscreen was of a pretty girl with a little blond boy who had to be around six months old in her arms, the pair smiling at the cameraman in the way her mother and her would look at her father.
And up in the sky, he kept two photos in his station. That same pretty girl in a white dress resting her head on the suited shoulder of a very dapper looking Bob. Next to that was a sonogram.
It was clear. Clear as day. He didn't need to say anything.
Part of Nat wanted to somehow convince her backseater to go home, to not put his life on the line and ensure that he lived to see his son grow up. Especially after the bird strike. She wanted to grab him by the shoulders and yell, "Go back to your wife, you fucking idiot."
But she couldn't do that. One, that's overstepping boundaries. And two, it was Bob's choice. He could've walked away when he heard how dangerous it was. He didn't. Bob knew the risks so this must've been his decision.
Therefore, Lieutenant Trace made it her personal mission to get Lieutenant Floyd back to his family. And she did. After Nat sets her mind to something, she uses all of her focus on getting it done.
Once all was said and done, Bob found himself alive and dancing stupidly as Maverick and Rooster landed safely. In all the cheering and revelry, Bob pulled his friend into a huge bear hug, which was something she never expected, and thanked her profusely for taking such good care of him. Then they both just stood there like fools and laughed like loons until everyone eventually calmed down.
"Nat, uh, are you going to the Hard Deck later?" Bob asked as they waited to dock, nudging his shoulder into hers.
"Probably. Are you?"
"No. The second we get to land, I'm running - and I mean running - to see my wife. And Finley, my son." He got his phone out of his pocket and handed it to her so she could have a proper look at his lockscreen. "I understand if you'd rather spend tonight with everyone else, but do you want to meet them?"
Weirdly, outright admitting that he family was like a weight being lifted off his chest. It's not as if it was a secret in any way. He didn't try to hide the fact. Honestly, he doubted that his colleagues would care one way or another.
But now? After everything they'd been through together, he knew Phoenix cared. She wouldn't show it on the surface, but he could read between the lines. They were more than coworkers. They were friends now, and friends that ensured the other's survival. And while it was unlikely either of them ever talked about their feelings, they understood. They were there for each other, no matter what.
"You know I'm going to hit on your wife, right? She's hot," Nat teased him, laughing when he pretended to punch her.
Her voice got softer as she focused on little Finley. "He looks like you. Has the same eyes, same hair..." she murmured.
She saw Bob watching her, too, with a softness in his eyes. A longing to be back with them. To be holding his family again.
A tiny pair of hard plastic specs were placed on the boy's nose in the photo, causing Nat to tease, "Same eyesight, clearly."
"Finn sure looks like me, but he's chatty like Y/N, not that he can speak yet. He tries, and he tries an awful lot."
A chuckle escaped Bob's lips as he thought about the happy sounds of his son's babbling.
"And be warned, he will attempt to bite your nose. We don't know why. Every new person he meets, one second he's sitting quietly, the next, he's up on his feet and trying to take a nibble at their snout."
"Weird," Nat hummed in amusement.
Just as Bob said, as soon as they docked and could see their families, he drove them to the apartment his family stayed in whilst he was in Fightertown. The second the front door was open, a very distinct batch of high pitched giggles and the clumsy pitter patter of two tiny feet coming towards the aviators could be heard.
Finley, armed with a tiny fistful of 'Welcome Home' balloons, bounced towards his father and launched himself at Bob's legs. Bob dropped his backpack and scooped the baby up and gave a big squeeze.
"Hey, big guy!" he greeted cheerfully, kissing the top of Finley's head. The small boy looked up at him through his glasses and bumped his nose against his father's. "These balloons for me? Or are they for Phoenix?"
"So this is Phoenix?" Y/N chirped as she leant against the kitchen doorframe, looking down into the foyer with a huge smile. She pushed off to join them and immediately offered Phoenix a hug, which was accepted without hesitation. "Lovely to meet you. I've heard so much about everything you do, he tells me over dinner how you keep him in check."
Sincerely, as sincerely as she could make it, Y/N took Nat's hand and gave it a squeeze. "Thank you for taking care of my Bo."
Natasha smiled fondly before nudging Bob and jeering, "Bo, huh?"
"Shut it."
"You wouldn't believe my surprise when I found out that this dork has a supermodel for a wife," Nat flirted with a knowing smirk. Bob chuckled and shook his head in disbelief as Y/N waved off the compliment with a loud snort, but there was no denying how her cheeks grew a little pinker.
"Do you two want me to give you some space? I'll just step into the other room so I don't have to get cucked right in front of my and my son's eyes," Bob joked as he looked between the pair, swaying his son in his arms in long soothing motions. He beamed at his wife and asked, "Am I going to get some lovin' or what?"
Dropping Nat's hand after a quick pat on her knuckle, Y/N stood on her tiptoes to give Bob a chaste kiss on his lips. "You're gonna get plenty of lovin'," she promised, grinning cheekily and mimicking his accent.
Every time his parents kissed, Finley felt the need to get in there and surged his head forward. And, like usual, he fully headbutted the pair. It had happened so many times, yet the couple were never ready for it and both let out groans of pain and annoyance as he made contact, only to laugh afterwards.
"Oh, I missed ya too, munchkin," Bob cooed before gently putting Finley back on the floor. The tyke quickly ran into the living room, his father's balloons still in his hand, and began climbing onto the couch where his toys were eagerly waiting for him.
"That happens way too often," Y/N told Nat, smiling as she placed a kiss on the point of injury on Bob's nose. "How do you take your coffee, Phoenix?"
There was an ease of domesticity to their interactions which Phoenix found utterly captivating and adorable. She wasn't used to it. She wasn't used to casual affection, intimacy, even. Not from anyone, really. Her upbringing had been rather strict with its rigid social expectations as a lot of military families happen to be. Her parents never did anything casually and it felt odd to feel so relaxed in a home she'd never stepped foot in before.
"Black. One sugar."
As Y/N disappeared into the kitchen, Natasha looked around the apartment, her gaze stopping on one of the many frames lining the walls. A prom picture of very young and nervous looking Bob had his cheeks being teasingly pinched by Y/N, his face scrunched up as she laughed at him, was the first she really noticed.
Next to that an image of the pair when they were even younger, six, maybe seven. A wide grin stretched across tiny Bob's face as he posed in a fighting stance, clad in his Halloween costume, which was the blue power ranger - next to an equally fierce Y/N as she posed as the pink ranger next to him.
"Childhood sweethearts, huh?"
Bob nodded as he watched his son playing with his toys in the corner of his eye. "Yeah, I've been in love with Y/N since I knew what love was, probably even before that," he confessed with a chuckle. His smile grew even softer as he added, "Took a while for me to tell her, and I mean a while. Two and a half decades, actually."
Natasha raised an eyebrow at him. "Two whole decades?!" she repeated in disbelief.
"I'm a nervous guy, okay?"
The aviators had a laugh at his expense, but had to cut it short as Bob quickly had to walk over to Finley to get him to stop trying to eat the corner of the coffee table. "What are you doing, you little freak?" Bob jeered at his boy, swooping him up in his arm and tickling him in retaliation until he let out a squeal of laughter. "Ahh, you're lucky I love you, little freak."
Finley reached his little hands out for his dad, trying to grab the fabric of his shirt as he wriggled desperately against Bob's grasp to escape the tickle attack. He was completely oblivious to Nat's amused expression as she observed the scene unfolding before her.
"I think he was born to be a dad," Y/N said as she appeared beside Nat with two cups of Joe in hand. She handed one to Natasha with a fond smile on her face, beaming as Bob began blowing raspberries on Finn's stomach. The little boy was practically hysterical as he kicked his legs frantically.
Y/N couldn't help but giggle as she watched Bob, and then turned to look at Nat, who was shaking her head in silent laughter at the scene. "Yeah, he seems to be pretty good at the whole thing," Nat agreed softly. She held the hot mug between her hands and brought the rim to her mouth to take a sip, sighing appreciatively as she felt warmth spread through her body.
After the day both Nat and Bob had, they needed any sort of comfort.
"Go, sit, sit," Y/N encouraged with a gesture of her hand and moved to place her coffee down on the coffee table. Then, almost like magic, she reached into her back pockets to retrieve two juice boxes, cooing as she held them both out to Bob, "One for Finley. And the other for dada."
Father and son looked identical as they slurped on their juice, side by side, and Phoenix almost thought Bob had been dolly the sheeped. It was spooky how similar the two looked, but it was definitely more on the cute side of things.
It was like Y/N knew that talking about the mission and everything it entailed would be distressing. The aviators needed some time to cool off before they had to deal with the fact that, yes, they could've died today. Watching a cute little baby was the best way to do that, it seemed.
Once he was finished with his juice, Finley finally noticed that Nat was there. He dramatically showed that he'd finished his drink to his mother and, in the process of looking at the other sofa, saw that there was another person there. A new person. A person he'd never seen before. A stranger.
Someone who was watching them with a warm smile. A friend, obviously. A gasp escaped Finley's lips as he put down his empty juice box on Bob's lap and scrambled down to the carpet so he could run at Phoenix, his excited squeals filling the room as he threw himself at her knees.
"You're definitely not as shy as your papa," she joked, lifting the boy so he could sit on the sofa next to her. He didn't stay seated for long and jumped up to stand on her thighs and rest his chin on her shoulders, gazing at the new girl with big curious eyes.
"Nose bite in 3...2...1," Y/N counted, and as both parents expected, Nat was promptly nipped on the tip of her nose by an eager child, giggling happily. Nat laughed as she rubbed the area.
"You little menace!" she whined playfully, giving Finn a playful tickle behind his neck and earning a delighted shriek, making him roll on the cushions as he laughed loudly.
Watching his new best friend interact with his son, Bob let out a happy sigh and placed his head against Y/N's shoulder. She gave him a loving peck on the temple and let her cheek fall to his hair. They sat quietly for a moment or two, enjoying the quiet atmosphere, each lost in their own thoughts.
Then, Natasha's phone made a noise. A ringtone that made it very clear who was calling her. The distinct sound of cockerel blared from her cell.
"Rooster?" Bob asked, raising his eyebrows questioningly.
"Yeah, mind if I take this?"
"Go for it."
Getting up and away from the boy seemed to be a task, but when Y/N cooed, "Finn...Finn, baby, what's mama got here? Is it chocolate?" Nat was free since, all of the sudden, the boy shot out of his seat and immediately rushed towards her. She lifted him onto her lap and reached for the mostly eaten packet of chocolate buttons they kept on the coffee table for moments like this, moments they needed something to bribe with.
"Does daddy get any?" Bob pouted in a fake pout, leaning forward slightly and resting his elbows on his thighs as he looked between his wife and son. Finn just grinned at him as he stuck his hand into the packet, offering one button to his father and intending to eat the rest for himself.
Bob took the treat and popped it into his mouth without hesitation as Y/N shook her head with a light blush. Finley looked up at her curiously, as if he was asking if she wanted a button too.
"Can mommy have a button?"
A chocolate button was soon being squished at her mouth, much to Finn's delight, as Y/N chuckled softly and accepted the offer. "Good boy, you're so good at sharing," she praised before she pressed a quick kiss to Finn's forehead and passed the packet back over to Finley who immediately started stuffing his face with the remaining sweets.
All too soon, the chocolate had run out and Finley was not happy about that at all. Y/N could tell just by his face that he was seconds away from crying, so she gently lifted him so he was resting his head against her shoulder and swayed them slowly together in a soothing rhythm.
Nothing in the world beat the sight of his family to Bob.
Before the baby came along, the couple would usually be already in bed and up to less innocent things. It always went that way. Bob would get home and immediately throw Y/N over his shoulder and carry her upstairs. Now that would have to wait until their son was firmly asleep.
Yet, Bob was completely fine with that. He'd hold out for a few hours if that ensured he got to see Finley's happy little smile.
"Rooster heard the words 'baby Bob' and demanded that I try to convince you guys to come with me to the Hard Deck," Phoenix explained as she returned, slipping her phone into her back pocket as she moved to sit back down.
Y/N glanced over at her husband as if to say 'up to you' and Bob nodded with a hearty, "Why not? Rooster gets whiny when he doesn't get his way."
"You should've seen him the other day when Maverick beat him at darts again," Natasha told him as she sipped from her coffee cup and glanced around. "He played a Wham! medley on the piano because he knows Pete is not their biggest fan."
And that was one of Brad's tamer days.
"Wanna go see Rooster, bud?"
Even though he had no idea what the hell a Rooster was, Finn nodded at his father.
After gathering a quick necessities bag and Bob ensuring that the car seat was in fact placed properly - which was something he did every car ride and found the same result every time - the squad was making their way to the bar. Nat had to be relegated to the backseats, a rare thing when it came to her and Bob, and she couldn't help but feel awkward when the child locks ensured that Y/N had to open her door for her.
Bradley was eagerly waiting for their arrival. He was good with children and he knew it. So was it any surprise that the moment Finley saw the Hawaiian shirt clad pilot, he was thoroughly starstruck? No, it wasn't.
"Who is this little dude?" Rooster chirped from his seat at the piano bench, waving his hand towards Finley as the kid approached him with his arms opened wide to give a tight hug. Once Rooster received him, he swooped Finn up into his arms. "Hi baby Bob."
Finley smiled brightly, babbling away with a smile as he clung onto Rooster's shirt, his small fists holding onto it tightly. The three other adults were waiting for the inevitable nose bite, but it never came. No, the young blond just stared up at Rooster with sparkling blue eyes, staring at him like he was a superhero.
"Finn, this is Rooster, you know like the -" Bob was interrupted.
"Wroo."
Honestly if it hadn't been so cute, Bob and Y/N would've been jealous. There had been no Mama. No Dada. But there had been a Roo. Finley's first word honour had been given to Bradley, a man he'd just met over his parents. Children are so ungrateful sometimes.
Rooster cheered and playfully waved Finn's arms about in celebration, while Finley giggled excitedly. "That's it kid, I'm Roo. Can you say it again?"
"Wroo!" the little boy cheered, causing a laugh to escape from the others.
"Well, he's clearly found his favourite person," Y/N joked, teasingly elbowing Bob in the ribs. He pretended to be hurt at first, but he couldn't stop smiling and brought his wife into his arms, giving her a kiss on the temple as they observed as Bradley placed the boy on his lap and his hands over Finn's so he could guide him to play the piano.
Just like that, every woman in the surrounding area let out a collective "Aw" as the pair started playing a soft tune.
"Bradley is definitely getting laid tonight," Nat teased as her eyes drifted from woman to woman, all of whom were drooling over the pilot who was clearly a big fan of kids.
And to rile her husband up, Y/N whispered in Bob's ear, "Robert is definitely getting laid tonight too," and felt as a sly hand made its way down to rest on her ass, giving her a small slap as he tried to keep his face as neutral as he possibly could.
One song turned into two, three. Finn just kept wanting more and more, so Y/N offered, "Want a beer, I'll drive home?" as she knew they could be there for a while.
"You sure, darlin?"
"Have fun, baby. You deserve it." Bob kissed her on the lips tenderly. "What does Phoenix and Rooster drink?"
With everyone's orders, she made her way to the bar and ordered, but she never would've guessed to see someone she recognised there. Y/N happened to glance over her shoulder as she waited for the drinks and saw one of her college buddies.
Buddies? Were they buddies? Is that what they were? Y/N honestly had no idea what they were. Fuck buddies who hung out a lot and did more than sex but refused to say that they were anything more than that.
"Hey Seresin!"
Jake had to do a double take. One second he was about to pocket a ball and the next he was being called at by Y/N L/N, someone he hadn't seen in years. "Well, well, well, Y/N, how are you still so fine after all these years?" he greeted with his signature grin, placing the bottle of been nursing down on the bar so he could give her a hug.
"Ah, still a charmer I see."
"No amount of time can stop me from being me, and you! And you, you're lucky to be the object of my affection. Come on, it will be old times!"
Clearly, he was still the same Jake. Y/N brushed him off with a laugh and changed the subject, "I'm guessing you're a pilot now. How was the big, very secret mission?"
Penny arrived with Y/N's drinks and was thanked before Y/N gestured to what Jake was drinking, "Want another?" and placed another bottle in front of him. As Y/N went to pay, Jake caught a glimpse at her left hand. Shit. She was married? Oh well, his celebration plans went out the window.
"How'd you know about the mission?" He glanced at her curiously, bringing his bottle to his lip and took a swig.
"My husband."
"What?"
"Yeah, my husband flew. Actually, he didn't do the flying bit. Phoenix did."
Weird. Cause Phoenix flew with Bob. And... and... and that would make Bob... the penny dropped for Hangman and he had a million questions.
"Baby on board? Baby on board is married to you? That's - that's so fucking weird. I've fucked someone Bob has?!? And he married you? And you married him?"
Snorting, Y/N added, "And we have a kid."
"And you have a KID?"
"Uh huh."
"When did that happen?"
"Finn will be a year old in a month."
Like he'd been summoned, Bob came to see what the commotion was all about. He'd seen Hangman come up to his wife and expected her to send him packing within two seconds, but they seemed to know each other.
"Everything alright?" Bob asked, glancing between his wife and Hangman, who was looking absolutely flabbergasted.
"You didn't tell me you knew Jake Seresin, Bo," Y/N replied as she gave Bob a light slap on the arm.
"Bo? Bo! He's Bo? Robert Floyd is Bo your best friend from back home? Wait! This is your husband?" Pieces of information that she told him so long ago clicked into place. This was Bo, the boy who had her heart.
"Yeah," Y/N grinned.
The look on Hangman's face was pure disbelief. "What is going on? You and him?!?"
Bob glanced over at Y/N in confusion, not understanding what was happening here. "Bagman, the fact you can't believe Y/N would ever go for me is kinda insulting, really."
Jake scoffed as he shook his head in amusement, leaning against the counter to prop himself up. "It's a small world, Bobby." A mischievous grin appeared as he inquired, "How's it feel knowing we have dated the same girl? You should feel honoured."
Horror flashed across Bob's face. He shifted his gaze to his wife, who just shrugged. "College," she muttered, more to herself than anyone else.
"College," Jake confirmed.
Now it was Bob's turn to ask, "You and him?!? Baby, I thought your standards were higher than that." He waved his hands in the general direction of Jake.
Y/N had to hold her laugh back. It was rare that Bob ever got jealous, but the fact that he was annoyed because he didn't think Jake was good enough for her was amusing.
"What? He was an older and more experienced handsome guy that, for some reason, took an interest in me, is that a crime?" she retorted, the humour evident in her voice.
"Yes!" he exclaimed.
"Now I'm feeling insulted," Jake added, pouting slightly as he rested his chin on top of his hands.
Chuckling, Y/N handed Bob some bottles from the counter and encouraged, "Come on, Phoenix is probably waiting on her drink," pushing him in the direction of the piano, only to look over her shoulder and offer, "Hey, wanna meet our son, Seresin?"
Hangman happily agreed, an attempt at being nonchalant attempting to pass his lips only to be replaced by an enthusiastic "Hell yeah."
Though it was tough to get Finley to notice anyone but Rooster, he did eventually meet Jake and was promptly lifted onto his shoulders to show off. "There we go, give me a lay of the land. See any babes that your uncle Jakey would be into?" Hangman cooed as he gently pushed Finley's chubby fingers away from his face and took them into his hands so he could hold onto them to move them rhythmically.
Wrapping her arms around Bob's neck, Y/N laughed at how he still had a slight pout, teasing, "Bo, my love, you're so cute when you're grumpy," and kissed his cheek, which prompted her husband to wrap his arm around her waist and hold her closer to him.
"Baby, I'm still caught up about the fact that you didn't tell me about you and Hangman," he whined.
"I did."
"No, you didn't. I think I would've remembered that, darlin'."
Smiling, she looked at the man she loved so much and rolled her eyes. "I've told you about Jake from college so many times," she explained and let her fingers tenderly brush through the hair at the nape of his neck.
She had. But hadn't put together that Jake from college was fucking Jake Seresin until that very moment.
"Hangman was the one who walked you to class every day?"
"Yeah, until he dropped out halfway through his last year because his mother was sick and he needed to take care of her." Y/N chuckled softly. "I don't know what he's done to make you think otherwise, but the Jake I knew, he was sweet and kind underneath all that frat boy shit."
Bob observed Jake and how he interacted with Finn. The little boy was tugging on Hangman's hair like Remmy with Linguini, each time he pulled the left strand, Jake would veer to the left and vice versa. It was rather cute to watch, and it made Bob realise that, as much as he hated to admit it, maybe Hangman wasn't so bad.
"Why'd you always have to be right?" Bob sighed, but let a small smile take over his face as he peppered her cheek with kisses, each longer than the last, until he finally pulled back and said, "Don't use that against me next time I'm all pouty."
Y/N hummed as she leant in close to him and gave him a soft peck on the lips. "Oh yeah? But I am always right," she murmured playfully, pulling back slowly until he was met with her stare.
"Course you are, honey," he whispered, running his finger along her chin and making sure their faces weren't too far apart, before leaning forward and capturing her lips once again in a kiss that was a little too passionate to happen in public.
They both pulled away when they heard Finn start babbling for attention. "What'd he say?" Hangman grinned.
"Wroo!" Finney shrieked excitedly, pointing at Rooster, who was in the process of talking to a beautiful lady but turned as soon as he was called and politely excused himself to take the boy from Jake's arms.
"That's going to become a problem," Bob joked, but there was truth to his words.
Just like his pa, Finley had a habit of fixating on things. Lego. Paw Patrol. Chocolate buttons. And now, Bradley Bradshaw.
Eventually, it became clear that his evening of meeting so many people began to tire Finley out as his eyes started to droop and his head dropped to rest against Rooster's chest. "I think you better get my BFF to bed," Brad whispered to Bob, earning a nod of agreement from him.
"Okay, bud, you tired?" Bob asked as he hoisted Finley up onto his hip. Finley nodded sleepily, holding onto Brad's shirt tightly. "Roo is going to stay here. Gonna have to say bye bye now. Say bye bye."
Sleepy babbles came out of his mouth with another muttered "Roo" as he very quickly fell asleep against his father's chest, snoring softly, and his tiny fists letting go of Rooster.
Then, after saying goodbye to everyone, the Floyd's were on their way home. The entire drive home, Bob found himself sliding his hand up and down Y/N's thigh as she drove. "Watch how high that hand is travelling, Bo. Our kid doesn't want to wake up to any funny business," she jeered, giving his hand a little squeeze and smiling when she saw his expression change to mock offence.
"I wouldn't dream of doing anything that wasn't PG, Y/N. I'm a sweet, innocent boy who's never done nothing wrong in my entire life. Besides," he leaned in close and whispered suggestively, "I want you all to myself, babe. No interruptions. I want all of your attention," before pulling back and flashing her a flirtatious smile as he sat back in his seat.
And Y/N couldn't help it, she burst into bashful laughter. It bubbled forth and flowed from her throat. There was no point trying to keep it hidden; she simply couldn't resist the urge to give into anything he wanted. After all, what was the harm in giving into the desire to be held and cherished by him?
They'd spent so long pretending they were purely platonic, and that was out of the window now. Being married really put all those feelings out there.
As soon as they got home, Bob carried Finley inside to tuck him into bed. "Night bud," he smiled fondly, kissing the boy on the forehead and turning to leave before announcing, "Love you, baby Bob."
With their child dealt with, Bob found his wife in their bedroom. When he entered, he stopped dead in his tracks and simply stared at her. She was sitting on the edge of the bed in nothing but her lacy lingerie, a smile playing across her pretty red lips as she teased, "You gonna stand there gawking at me all night?"
He shook his head to bring himself back to reality. "No...no. Just...wow..."
"You like? I bought it for tonight."
"Like? Darlin, I love it! God, you're gorgeous," he breathed out and moved towards her, kneeling between her legs so he could kiss at her thighs and then work his way upwards.
She reached to touch his hair, stroking it gently before caressing his cheek as she replied, "I thought you might. That's why I did it," and giggled when Bob groaned against her skin, unable to stop himself from sucking a mark on her inner thigh.
Pushing the leg that he wasn't paying attention to further into the mattress, Bob's lips trailed closer and closer to where she desperately wanted them to go. "Fuck," Y/N breathed as she felt his tongue lick her through the thin material of her underwear, just enough pressure to elicit a moan from deep within her chest.
The sound alone made him stop and pull back, beaming brightly at her as he admired her features. "What do you want me to do? Ask and I'll do it," his hands trailed to her hips and he leant upwards to whisper, "But only if you ask nicely."
Y/N nudged her nose against his and murmured, "You can do whatever you want to me tonight, baby. Whatever," and kissed his lips deeply. His hands travelled to undo her bra, allowing him to cup her bare breasts whilst his tongue worked its way into her mouth, stroking the soft sensitive flesh gently before biting her bottom lip, and causing her to whimper into the kiss.
Her arms wrapped themselves around his neck as he pulled herself upwards so that their bodies were flush against each other's, the feeling of his warm skin brushing her own sending shivers racing down her spine. She ran her nails across his back, feeling the muscles underneath his shirt relax under her touch and he groaned lowly in response.
Rather abruptly, he sat up, yanked his shirt over his head, tossing it to the floor where it landed on the heap of her discarded clothes, and patted his lap. "You're in that kind of mood, huh?" she commented, giving him a sweet kiss as she bent over knees and prepared herself for the spank she knew was coming her way.
Obviously, they couldn't make that much noise but the smack to her ass wasn't exactly quiet. Bob gently caressed her reddening skin directly after it happened, smirking as he noticed the way her breathing grew shallower, the way her eyes fluttered closed and the way she bit her lip so she wasn't too loud.
"You ever let Jake bend you over his knee and spank you?" he asked, more jealousy than he would've liked in his tone, and she merely chuckled lightly before rolling her eyes.
"...Robert."
"Sorry, sorry. I just can't wrap my head around it, that's all."
He rubbed gentle circles on her lower back as he waited for her to respond and soon, she craned her head back to look at him. Her lips curved into a smirk as she watched him, amused by how serious he looked. To apologise, he leant down and softly kissed her shoulder.
Yet, it didn't take long before his hand was drifting back down her butt. His fingers hooked around her panties and pulled them off to the side so he could run along her folds teasingly and slowly dip his middle finger inside her entrance. He pumped it in and out slowly, enjoying the way that she squirmed and writhed beneath him.
Bob took his time to tease her and watch her face closely. As her lips parted and eyes widened, he curled his finger in deeper and faster and cooed, "That good, hmm?" She moaned and nodded, gripping onto the covers beside her as his name rolled past her lips. "Oh yeah, baby? You like that, darlin'? Does it feel good?"
His voice sounded thick with lust and need as his other hand brushed some hair that had fallen across her face, pushing it back behind her ear before it was trailing down to grasp her breast. She gasped sharply when he dipped another finger inside her, the sensation so intense, she could feel sparks running up and down the length of her body.
"Don't you dare come till I tell you to, babe," he commanded in an authoritative tone that he only tended to use when he was in the sky. And she couldn't deny how that voice would send her further towards the edge every time he used it.
At the exact moment her legs began to shake, he withdrew his fingers and rested them against her ass cheek. "You're so mean, Bo," she whined playfully, pouting as her eyelids fluttered shut and her head dropped down to the duvet
Then he edged her again and again and again. Tears collected in the corner of her eyes as she gripped the sheets tightly, feeling so incredibly sensitive and needy. "Stand for me," he instructed, and she obliged without hesitation although she was a little wobbly because of the pleasure he caused her. "Good girl."
Before he got up to manoeuvre her into position, he tugged her hips towards him to kiss her across stomach and all over her pregnancy stretch marks. Nowhere in Bob's brain did he understand why she was a bit self conscious of them. Not only did they look like little lighting bolts, but it was a reminder of their son and how he'd been that bun in her oven.
"Beautiful," he said, pressing light kisses over one stretch mark and grinning proudly when her cheeks flushed pink before moving to cover another one. "God, I hope Finley has your looks when he grows up."
Y/N snorted. It was already very clear who he'd grow up to look like. "I doubt that. Maybe we'll have to make another one for that hope to come true," she beamed, tracing her forefinger down his cheek and gazing lovingly at his handsome face that seemed to get brighter with every word she spoke. "Maybe we should try for a girl."
Another kid? Bob felt like it was Christmas again. "Yeah?" he grinned at her and got even more excited when she nodded. "Well, what are you waiting for? Bend over the side of the bed."
So, Y/N did as she was told and was rewarded with another spank as Bob stood behind her, his palm trailing up her thighs to rest on her waist as he removed the remainder of his clothes in a hurry, lined himself up with her entrance and gave himself a stroke before pushing inside of her.
"Ah, fuck," he groaned as Y/N's walls clenched around him, holding fast even though they'd barely started. "You can come as many times as you want to," he whispered breathlessly as he tried to calm himself down. "Let me just find my rhythm."
With how hard he'd riled her up, it didn't take long before she was gushing, her whole body writhing beneath him. Her cries rang out into the plush duvet as her legs trembled violently and she arched her back, but Bob didn't stop. He kept driving in and out of her, loving the muffled sounds she was making with each thrust.
"Good girl, you made such a big mess. Can you feel yourself dripping down your thighs?" Bob purred, leaning over to kiss the back of her shoulder as he continued to drive in and out of her while she shook beneath him.
Honestly, nobody had ever satisfied her like Bob had. He knew her and her body so deeply that it was easy for him to bring her complete bliss.
"It's a blessing really, all that slick on my cock makes it so easy - so, so easy - to fuck you right," he mumbled, nuzzling the side of her face and inhaling deeply, relishing in the feeling of having her wrapped around him completely. Y/N cried out in surprise as he pushed into her even deeper than he already had, the pressure overwhelming and making her lose all the brain cells she had once had.
And Bob knew that as soon as he asked, "Feel good, baby? Huh?" She answered with a whine that told him everything he needed. "Oh darlin, I've fucked you stupid already? That's got to be a record."
A low groan slipped past her lips as he stopped for a moment to shift her further onto the bed so that plant his knees on the duvet and pound into her with his front flush to her back. Every possible bit of his skin was touching hers as his body possessively held her down; his hands finding hers, holding them securely against the mattress as he continued to thrust into her.
"Sorry babe, I'll pay for some more," Bob grunted as he pulled back to rip her lace panties as they had begun to move around and it was annoying him to no end. Once they were gone and promptly thrown over his shoulder, Bob got back at it and teased, "Felt you clench, did that turn you on? It did, didn't it?"
She hummed in agreement, biting down on her lip so she wouldn't cry. The sound sent a spark through his veins, igniting the fire burning through his gut, causing him to become wild and impatient as he began to thrust hard, slamming into her harder and faster, losing control of his own body in pure primal hunger.
"Look at you," he cooed, smiling devilishly as he brought his hand to her neck and gently tilted her head to face him. She looked dazed and dumb, tears streaking down her face, her lips swollen and red from all the biting she'd done to them. Her hair was sticking to her sweaty forehead and he loved watching her in such a state.
He wanted nothing else in the world than seeing her look exactly how she did right then; beautiful, vulnerable and desperate for him to continue making her feel this wonderful. "You're so beautiful," he uttered between quick panting breaths, stroking her jaw with his fingertips. "All mine. All for me."
The words sent her into a frenzy, her breathing becoming short and fast and frantic. Her body tightened around him as waves of ecstasy washed over her. His movements quickened and soon, he found himself coming undone within her body. Panting loudly as he let out a moan of satisfaction, he buried his face into the crook of her neck and slumped on top of her.
His chest heaved and sweat coated his toned body as he held onto her tight, kissing his way along her collarbone and neck as he jolted along with the beat of his heart until his breathing calmed.
"Holy fuck... Oh fuck…" Y/N whimpered softly, still shuddering slightly under him and he chuckled to himself at how utterly adorable she looked as she tried to get her brain back online and regain some semblance of sanity. "I wasn't too loud, was I?"
"There were no knocks on the door, so I assume not," he answered, kissing down her neck and taking delight in the small gasp she let slip when he nibbled lightly on her skin. Her eyes were glazing over and her cheeks were flushed but there was a hint of a smile playing on her lips which pleased him greatly. "Wanna go again?"
"Give me a minute."
But when Bob rolled his hips once more, she was, once again, like putty in his hand, her mouth opening as she gasped for air.
"What if I can't wait that long?" He laughed as her legs twitched involuntarily underneath him and he got right up to her ear to whisper, "I'm not going to stop until this perfect pussy is filled to the brim with my cum."
It was going to be a long and draining night, that was sure.
In the morning, Y/N stretched to find that Bob was already out of bed. She threw on some clothes and, on achy legs, went in search of her husband. It didn't take long to find him and when she rounded the corner into the kitchen, she found him cooking breakfast in his underwear while Finley sat on the counter, talking to a very sleepy looking Rooster on facetime.
"Hey Rooster," she called out, making her presence known by all three boys.
"Roo!" Finn pointed to the phone and squealed happily when she picked him up off the counter and gave him a hug.
"You do realise he's going to do this every morning?"
From the other line, Brad chuckled. "Yeah, we might have to schedule a time that's a little later if I'm going to be honest." Then he caught a glimpse at a purple bruise on the side of Y/N's neck. "Jesus Bob, you really went for it, huh?"
Bob craned his head around to see what the hell Bradley was talking about, and immediately turned pink at the sight. "Sorry babe," he apologised, although he didn't really feel all that sorry, and gave her a quick kiss before moving back to the sausages he was frying.
"It looks as if you got in a fight with an octopus, Y/N."
"Maybe I did."
Sure, Bob didn't mind sharing information about his family with his coworkers, his sex life on the other hand, that was certainly off-limits. He reached out and happily squidged Y/N's hip as if he was mentally saying "Don't tell him any more or there will be consequences."
Who knows, maybe she'd like those consequences.
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google1000 · 8 days
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John: Curt, there's something I need to tell you. Buck and I are dating
Curt: I've known for the last two years, you two are inseparable
John: Years? We've only been dating for a few weeks!
Curt: .....weeks?!
Curt: Then what the hell were you doing before that?!
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google1000 · 9 days
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Bucky: It has come to my attention that some people here have been calling me a "man-whore", which I do not appreciate. Bucky: I prefer gentleman of the night. Bucky: Or prosti-dude.
inspo
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google1000 · 10 days
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Robert "Rosie" Rosenthal: I don’t think we can mansplain, manipulate, or malewife our way out of it this time
John, cracks his knuckles: Manslaughter it is
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google1000 · 11 days
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Bucky: You lying, cheating, piece of sh*t! Buck: Oh yeah? you're the idiot who thinks you can get away with everything you do. Welcome to the real world Bucky: I'm leaving you, and I'm taking Curt with me! Brady *packing up the monopoly board*: I think we're gonna stop playing now
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google1000 · 12 days
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Buck: Your smile? It makes my day.
Bucky: Your happiness? I live for that.
Kidd: A room? Fucking get one.
Curt: Hotel? Trivago.
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google1000 · 13 days
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Bucky: *dancing* Buck: What's he doing now?? Kidd: You can't see? Buck: Not with my hands over my eyes
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google1000 · 14 days
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Crosby: I sleep with a knife under my pillow. Brady: Weak. I sleep with a gun. DeMarco: You’re both pathetic Brady: What do YOU sleep with? DeMarco: Curt.
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google1000 · 15 days
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Curtis: Buck. will you do me the honor of becoming my brother-in-law? Buck: what the fu- Buck: did you just propose to me for Bucky? Curtis: ... Buck: ... Bucky: ... Curtis: someone had to do it!
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