goose-in-suit

[goose-in-suit]

No more Sun PT.2

WHERES SUN!?!?! WHYS THERE BOTTLES EVERYWHERE!!!!???"

"Moon calm down....sun upstairs, sleeping with Lunar,"

"Is he ok?"

"He had a bit of a break down and....well....drank every bottle,"

"I'm going to wake him up,"

"Just don't get mad at him Moon,"

"I just want to know he's ok..."

I quickly ran upstairs when Earth moved.

I found sun curled uo under the blanket and Lunar pretty draped over him. Both were snoring softly.

I move to Sun, gently touching one of his rays, which retracted, "Sun....brother...wake up,"

He opened his pupilless eyes and muttered something beofr closing his eyes again.

"I think he's a bit...drunk....I mean, he drank all the wine bottles. That's a lot for him,"

I tried again, genlty shaking him this time. I ended up waking Lunar instead. He fell to the floor with a small yelp

"Wha!? Oh hi Moon..."

"Hey Lunar. Sun, please wake up,"

"Whyyyyyy?"

He sounded....differnt. Maybe he was drunk.

Please be ok my dear brother

"Sun! We need to talk!"

"But I want to sleep....."

"Sun PLEASE! I LOST SOLAR I CANT LOOSE YOU TOO!"

He went quite and I started crying

Wer both hurt, and we both can't take anymore....

"Sun please....talk to me. Or Earth! Or even Lunar!"

"I may not be the best at helping, but I'll eat Nutella straight out of the jar with you....all night,"

Lunar always knew how to make people laugh

I watched as sun's rays retracted, he sat up and stated at his hands.

"I'm the only one who hasn't died yet....you have....solars gone....Lunar wa sgoen for a while, and Earth technically died for a few hours....I've lost everyone then got them back

I'm scared ill loose everyone again. Scared that, the ones I love will get pulled away once more.

Moon, you know I've never been good at dealing with this stuff. I don't know how to control the shit inside my head!

I couldn't stop Eclipse! I started all this because I wasn't strong Enough! I'll never be enough! ILL never even be smart enough!  ILL NEVER BE GOOD OR STRONG ENOUGH!!!"

And now we were both sobbing.

"It's my fault sun! If old me wasn't so selfish, he would've found a way to get rid of his kill code instead of leaving it in you! He loved you, and so do I!

He would die again for you, I would die for you.

Your my brother Sun, and I Love you! I wouldn't care if your not enough! Your the glue holding me togetehr! Holding us together.

Sun.....you may not be the smartest, or the strongest....but you've got the biggest heart.

You give chamces, your alway there for me...for us.

Sun, your so much, more then I'll ever be. Your the heart of our family. And we all love you!"

"You and Moon were the first ones to care about me,"

"You helped me understand what was going on, even tho you just lost Moon. You didn't even push me away," Earth added

"I think it's time for a break. For all of us. Wer all hurting. How about....we go and....maybe just chill on the beach. Sleep, Build sand castles...can we swim? I don't kneo, but we can still chill in the water," Lunar said from his spot on the floor

"Family time actully sounds nice...."

𓅭 𓅰 𓅭 𓅰

And there we were...on the beach.

Earth was building a sand castles with sun

Lunar was just floating in the water.

I watched as Sun was trying to dig a moat for Earth's castle.

Sun looked a little better.

I grabbed some damp sand, balled it up and chucked it at sun.

It hit him right in his rays.

"Mooooon!!!!!"

"What? What happned?"

As I was acting dumb, I had a sand ball fly by my face.

A big sand ball fight started.

I just hope we can all get better

𓅭 𓅰THE END𓅭 𓅰

[goose-in-suit]

No More Sun

If you haven't watched dthe Sun and Moon show yet, well check it out, it's really good. It's on YT.

Spoilers

Just. One. More. Bottle.

"I promise Moon...just one more bottle,"

"Sun, there's like 10 bottles here! They're all empty. Look I know wer aanimations, but 10 seems like a bit much,"

"It's fine..."

"Sun...I don't knwo how long I'll be gone while I'm talking to old me...I don't want to leave you alone when you like this,"

The warmth is impossible to give up

"I'll be ok, you just, go talk to old you..."

I need something to make these thoughts stop

"Call Earth if you feel like...you can't be alone. Brother, promise me you'll call Earth,"

I can't do this any more

"I promise Moon, now you just give figure out what ever your going to figure out,"

Why can't I be smart like Moon

"I love you Sun,"

I don't love me

"Love you too Moon,"

"Ill be back in a few hours"

"Ok..."

I'm already dead inside...a few more bottles won't hurt.

Everything had gone to SHIT!

Solar gone....another bottle gone

We still don't knwo what to do with ruin or Blood moon....Empty bottle...

Eclipse is still here....13 more empty bottles

Our Fucking crator causing chaos...Tears?...I can cry?

The Astral body's are gonna come for Lunar....I...I can't do this....I need more

Everyone's dies but me...I'm next aren't i...where the rest of the bottles.

"FUCK!" I hit my knees and start crying, I double over, touching my face plate to the floor

My rays are retracted...I can't help it.

"ILL NEVER BE GOOD ENOUGH!"

I need more. I need MORE

I open the cabinet and find about 50 more bottles....it's not enough

Bottle after bottle....

I look back to see there's only 5 left. I feel woozy now...but I need more.

I can down them all...if I mess myslef uo...maybe it's for the better.

We've both been through so much...Moon isn't even the Moon I separated from....If we just stayed as one, Eclipse would've never happned.

I finally stood up and looked around....there's bottles everywhere.

I miss Solar...I need more

I have no more

"Hey kittie...."

"Merow,"

"I'm sorry...let's go to bed, or just lay in bed,"

I need to call Earth

I don't want to be alone right now.

☆Earth☆

"18....19....20! Ready or not! Here I come!"

"Be careful, Lunar,"

"It's hide and seek...how would I hurt myslef?"

"I done know...being...protective. Oh! Sun's calling!"

"Hey Sun! Me and Lunar were just playing with the Deer thing,"

"Deer thing?"

"Oh ya, we didn't tell you, so-"

"Earth, I need you to come here...please,"

"Sun...Sun are you ok?"

"....No...."

"Ill be right over. Lunar!!! We have to go!!!"

~°~°~°~°~°~

"Why's the door open..."

"Uh..."

"Let me go In first lunar....SUN!!!!"

"Uh...Earth...thers bottles...everywhere,"

☆Sun☆

"SUN!!!!!"

"I'm in my room....under the covers,"

I hear them scurring to my room

"Why is your door open?!?! I was about ot yell, 'ITS THE POLICE'"

"What? The cats are just out,"

"Oh ok...so first of all...what's wrong Sun, hold on...lemme shrink down,"

"Sun? Why are there like...300 bottles in the kitchen, and why are they all empty,"

"I..." I pull the blankets closer, "I may have had a break down..."

"SUN DID YOU DRINK ALL THOSE BOTTLES!!! WHAT HAPPNED TO DRINKING TEA!!!"

I've never heard Earth yell that loud befor. I started crying again.

"I'm sorry..."

"I'm sorry...I shouldn't yell, Sun tell me what's wrong,"

"Do you want me to leave? I'll go find the cats,"

"Please stay Lunar, I need you both,"

Earth looked so concerned

This is my fault...she's concerned because of me

"I just can't handle it anymore. Everything hurts. I miss Solar, I feel like I'm a disappointment and ...and...and-"

"Sun calm down...how about you write a list of what's hurting right now hm? Lunar could you find soem paper?"

"Mkay"

"Sit up Sun? Let's get you more comfortable,"

Earth threw a couple more blankets around me and Lunar came running in with paper and a pen, he climbed on the bed and sat on my legs.

"I have, delivered the paper,"

"Good job Lunar,"

~°~°~°~°~°~

"That's alot Sun...I'm sorry your feeling like this,"

"I could honestly use a distraction..."

Lunar was alseep on my legs, that made me feel a little better.

"Oooo how about I tell you about Dazzle!?!"

"The deer?"

"Yeah, so she's of course liek a deer, we think it's her endo skeleton,"

"Aprently she was supposed to be ghe original DJ music man or something,"

Didn't know Lunar was still awake.

"Yeah, she acted kinda like a child, barely able to say her own name,"

"Are they at least nice?"

"It seemed like she was, she only wanted friends to play with really....Sun you should sleep, Moon will be back soon. Me and Lunar will stay right here,"

"I guess ima bit tired,"

"Good night sun,"

"Night Earth...night Lunar,"

"Night, Night,"

Ya knwo what? Imma make this a 2 parter, stay tuned

[goose-in-suit]

A bad coping Mechanism

°•°Hamilton°•°

Exhausted, Was all I could think of. My wife and kids just left to go upstate and I almost had an affair with Mrs. Reynolds. A lucky dodge for if my wife found out...well, I dont want to think about it.

It's been a hard month. A lot of fights with Jefferson and Burr. The struggle of getting my plan to congress. My wife pressuring me to take a break, but i can't...I just can't. I'm sure Washington would give my soem time off...but...if stop working then...Laurens. No..don't think of him.

Maybe I should talk to Washington..about how I'm feeling. No...I've got work to do.

I spend the next few hours working, I refuse to think on anything other then work, that is till I relize, I'm quite hungry. I haven't eaten in a few days and it was now getting in my way of working.

I get up from my desk, swaying a bit. I really should sleep. I don't even knwo what I'm going to eat. As I make my way to the kitchen, I decide to make a grill cheese sandwich. Nothing extra, just bread and cheese. Cooked bread of course. I start the wood stove and move away while I wait.

I finish cooking and sit down to eat. I knwo...me...sitting...crazy. I spot a small knife on the table. I don't knwo why or what drives me to do so. But I grab it. I roll up my sleeves and bring the knife to my arm, just below the crook of my elbow. I push it in and drag it towards me. I draw a small red line that starts bleeding. I don't knwo what it is but it soothe my racing mind, brings me back into the present. I feel better. I cover the small cut and start eating.

°•°•°•°

I didn't do it offten, maybe once a week, when the feelings flooded and I didn't knwo what else to do. The cuts were always small and thin, always right below the crook of my elbow. Then I started doing it more offten. It just felt right and I don't think I know how to cope anyway else. Even though my wife and kids were home...I just...I needed the pain to escape my worries and emotinal pains.

Here I was, cutting again. I cut each day this week. Always in my office with the door locked. I look down at my arm and stare at the small thin healed scars. They weren't bad, and that's all I can say about it. I had to go to work in a few minutes. I kiss my wife good bye and run out of the door, down the street and into the building I call work. As soon as I walk through the door I'm met with the annoying snear of Thomas Jefferson.

"What do you wnat," I snap instantly. I've realized I've been more irattable lately.

"Just wanted to say good luck at the cabinet meeting today," He says with an annoying smirk.

I turn away from him and angrily walk to my office. On my way there I run into Washington. I apologize quickly, without even looking at him. I enter my office and close my door. Locking it quickly.

Pulling out the small sharp knife from my coat pocket, I sit down. I roll up my sleeve just a bit, just a little bit, to let off some steam befor the cabinet meeting. Just a little bit.

Just a little bit I said. Not too much I said. I didn't mean to go as far as I did but when I finally snap back to reality by a sharp pain, I relize I had cut up my whole arm. And I just cut deep. My arm if bleeding badly and stained red. I slap my hand over the deeper cut and dig through my desk, finding a roll of linen bandages. I pour my bottle of alcohol over my arm, scrunching my eyes in pain. There was a soft knock at my door, and I hear Washington soflty call my name.

As quick as I can I wrap my arm and pull my sleeve down.

"Just a second," I call back.

I race to the door and pull it opend, neutralizing my expression befor opening it.

"Sir," I say as happily and kindly as I can.

"Are...you alright Alexander?" Washington asks me, looking concerned.

"Why do you ask sir, of course I am alright," I lie...I lied to the president and my former Comanding Officer.

I guess I was holding my left arm because Washington grabs it. I jump bsck as he does so. He gasps as he tugs up my sleeve, reveling the blood stained bandages.

Washington pushes me further into my office and closes the door, locking it. He turns to me and grabs my arm, looking for thr end of the bandage.

"Sir, dont," I says quickly, pulling my arm away. He takes it back just as fast.

"What is this Alexander!?" Washington demands.

I start fidgeting and Washington gets more concerned, I don't fidget much. Nor do I studder, which I also started doing.

"Alexander!"

"It's nothing!" I snap

"Don't lie to me son."

"I am not your son!!!"

"I see you as my son, I see you as my own," He says, his tone tell me he's done arguing, "Now tell me what happend,"

I look away, filled with shame I can't even look at Washington. I've been caught...and called out, I can't lie my way out.

There was another knock at the door. James Madison, "The meeting is in two minutes Hamilton," He calls, and I hear his foot steps leaving. Saved by the sick man.

"We're not done here Alexander," Washington warns, "Wer going to talk about this when the meetings over, and don't you dare run off or hide," He adds a bit of anger to the last part.

°•°•°•°

And there I was. Arguing with Thomas and refusing to look at Washington. I got so heated during our debate that I forgot all about the fact that Washington knew about my cutting.

Once Washington dismissed everyone, I stormed to my office with the intent of taking my knife to my arm again.

There was a harsh tug on my shoulders and I turned to see a very concerned Washington.

"Where do you think your going son," The Virginian veteran asks.

"IM NOT YOUR SON," I'm boiling now. I think I've finally hit my limit. I don't know why but I started crying.

Washington quickly ushers into his office, locking the door he turns to me just as I slide down the wall and onto the floor.

"Alexander..." His voice was soft and kind as he sits next to me.

I turn away from him, feeling like a kid mad at their parents. I roughly wipe at my eyes and try to compose myself. I haven't cried in so many years.

"I'm sorry," I whisper, I probley sound crazy. I jump as Washington places a hand on my shoulder.

"Would you like to tell me what happend?" His tone was so welcoming, "did you do this to yourslef?"

I break... I start telling Washington about everything. How stressed I've been. How coming to work has made me even more stressed because of Thomas and cabinet meetings. I tell him about Mrs Reynolds. About how much I miss Laurens. I explain how cutting myself releases the stress and how it's been getting worst.

When I finish, I stare at Washington, praying for understanding. I'm hyperventilating and trembling a bit.

I can tell Washington was trying to think of a way to calm me down. Before I can apologize again, Washington wraps me in a hug. I wrap my arms around him and we sit there for a while befor Washington let's go and stands up, leaving me on the floor.

"Alexander...you cannot keep doing this," He says as I too stand up, "it's not healthy," He takes my left arm and rolls up my sleeve.

He starts pulling the bandages away and this time I let him. He looks shocked but he quickly goes back to looking serious. He grabs a bottle of whiskey and holds my arm away from him as he pours the bottle over my arm. I hiss in pain and pull my arm away.

"Sorry," Washington mumbles as he digs through his desk and pulls out clean linen bandages.

Washington wraps my arm tightly and ties off the end neatly. He looks at me then turns away and walks to the window. I can tell he has no idea what to do.

"Son, I expect you to tell your wife,"

I let the "son" pass this time

"She doesn't have to know...no one  else has to know,"

Washington gives me a look taht says this isn't up for debate.

"Alexander!" He says sternly, "your wife can help you, and if you won't tell her then I will,"

°•°•°•

A couple weeks later and I still haven't told my beautiful wife. I have also cut a time or two, much to Washington's disappointment. He started checking my arm daily. 

Then, he called my to his office. It was a decent day; I had gotten good sleep and Thomas wasn't there!

However my day crumbled when I saw my wife talking with Washington. She turns to ne when I close the door.

"Hun, what did you do?" She said sternly, I look at Washington and he motions for me to tell her.

"N-nothing!" I shuddered and answered way to fast. My hearts pounding in my chest.

I turn to leave but Washington had gotten up and grabbed my arm. He locks the door and drags me to sit with my wife. I turn away from her, ashamed. She starts rubbing my back. It's comforting but I'm still panicking. I never wanted anyone to know...now my boss knows and soon my wife will too.

"Alexander...honey...are you alright?" Her tone is so kind

"I'm fine," I snap. I didn't mean to snap at my Eliza.

"Alexander!" Washington said, "be honest. Would you rather me say it?"

I just nod. The floor had become very interesting.

"Mrs Hamilton, your husband has been physically hurting himslef. With a knife I presume,"

I winch at the statement, getting up to leave again. This time it's Eliza who stops me. She pulls me back intothe chair and forces me to look at her. I'm wiping tears now and she gently cups my cheek, whiping a tear with the thumb.

"I'm sorry," I whisper.

"Let me see Alexander," She says softly and I hold put my left arm to her.

She genlty rolls up my sleeve and gasps when she sees the numerous cuts. She looks into my eyes and wraps me in a gentle hug.

I bury my face in her shoudler and I can feel Washington's hand on my back.

"I'm sorry," I keep repeating that. Over and over.

"I know I know, shhh," She says soflty, pulling away from me, holding my shoudlers as i wipe at tears, "easy now, your ok. Im not mad."

Eliza has me sit down again, she lightly runs her hands over my scared up arm.

"How about you tell me why and when you started doing this," She says, bringing her hand up to play with my auburn hair.

"I started when you went upstate," I sniffle a bit, "I just...there was so much on my mind, between work, feeling bad for not going with you, Laurens..." I look down but soon continue, "I've been having more nightmares....of the hurricane, the battlefield...my mother. I guess I finally snapped,"

"You really need a break son,"

"I agree with the president my love," Eliza says soflty, "stay home for a bit, relax, sleep more, eat more. Just work on your mental state alright?"

"But I've got so much work to do,"

"And all that work led you to a nervous break down," Washington pulls some cash out of his inside coat pocket. He hands it to me and I count it. It amounts to $100. Looking up at the president, I guess I looked shocked cuz he chuckled.

"It's the 5th, I dont wnat to see you here till the 1st of next month. Take care of yourself son," Washington turns to my wife and adds, "please take his knife away,"

°•°•°•°

And with that me and Eliza call a cab back home. Th horse that pulled the carrge had a shiny jet black coat and large black eyes.

I pay the driver a few coins amd climb into the carriage. Eliza strokes my arm and I smile. I love my wife so much.

We spend a few minutes in comfortable silence as the carriage gently rocks back and forth.

°•°•°•°

Inside our house, I'm laying on the couch, my head in Eliza lap. The kid were out at school and it was only the second day of my month long break.

Eliza was running a comb through my hair. It was soothing and I was starting to fall asleep.

"Feeling any better?" She asked, I just smiled and nodded. I barley heard her, I was half asleep.

She continued to comb my hair, occasionally trailing the comb down my back. Which caused a soft ticklish sensation that just calmed me further.

"You don't have to suffer alone anymore, my dear Hamilton,"She had said soflty as I finally fell asleep.

I had somone to confide in. My beautiful, loving wife.

THE END

This ain't the first time posting a story, on here yes, on other platforms no. So enjoy