gravenet

[gravenet]

Zombie apocalypses are curiously lacking a large array of common equipment that could neatly control the situation.

“But we can’t build walls to contain them!”

Moves by truck, train or boat. Ridiculously common. And see those holes on the bottom? Mobile by forklift. Also, HEAVY, even when empty they’re in the tons. If you had some warning you could string these things end to end for miles and human bodies can’t move them. Plus they’re nice and wide so you can comfortably walk on top of them for patrols.

“But we don’t have easy ways to kill them!”

Put the shotgun down you fucking idiot.

No tires to pop. Heavy and slow but inevitable. Climbing required to enter and thus, relatively zombie proof, especially if you spend like an hour to protect the glass.

A lot of large farming equipment can destroy cars.

Want to guess what it’d do to a decaying human body? It’s not pretty.

Now I know what you’re thinking. Merely flattening them with common construction equipment or farming gear isn’t enough.

How about a

tree trimmer that can mulch a tree top to bottom in nothing flat?

OM NOM NOM NOM.

“But we need ways to move a lot of people that zombies can’t stop!”

BEEP BEEP MOTHERFUCKER. Deer don’t have a chance and neither does a zombie.

“But that’s not good enough!”

NOW it’s time to call our friend the military because this ride stops for no one.

Do I need to keep going or is it clear the movies are bullshit yet? Seriously a dozen prepared people with heavy equipment licenses could clear an entire street of zombies AND powerwash it after.

[gravenet]

Modded the shit out of skyrim.  It went well, until a mod broke.  I...might have to completely uninstall skyrim and reinstall just to get the game to open at all.

[gravenet]

So who are you?

Inbox me how we met!  Or didn’t meet.  I can’t remember who all is who, and I think if I put effort in I could...but I’m more curious to see how you guys remember meeting or following me.  Indulge me?

[gravenet]

About my pokemon Trainer!

@hollowsentinel

My Starter pokemon was Solosis, a psychic type.  He’s named Soma, and has since evolved into a Duosion.  He’s very slow (almost guaranteed last in initiative order), but he hits like a bag of trucks, and he’s really tanky.  Plus he’s got amazing recovery potential.

My first catch was a Cottonee.  Her name is Pix, and she’s a Whimsicott now.  In contrast to Soma, she’s incredibly fast.  Decent damage, decent bulk.  She’s very tricksy with some status effects and heal over time/drain.

During the same first encounter, I also caught a Hoppip.  He had the name of Dandy, and he managed to evolve into a skiploom before I traded him.  We’re doing a wonder trade system.  You offer a pokemon up, and every day you roll a check.  The result determines how many offers you get, and for each offer the DM uses a random generator with a level range (excluding legendaries, of course).  I got a Porygon, which I named Vector.  Vector is kind of low level, and he’s in the PC for now while I challenge my first gym (a grass gym). After the first encounter, but before I traded Dandy, I managed to befriend a Sentret, which I didn’t immediately catch, but followed me around.  A day later, he let me catch him.  His name is Ace, and he’s fast with a pretty high amount of HP.  He’s not too tanky defense/spdefense-wise, but his evasion is pretty high.  Even if he’s not attacking, he’s got Helping Hand, which buffs an ally’s next attack.  He’s got really good movement, too.

Eventually, we were in a swamp and found a bunch of Wooper.  They (and myself) were ambushed by Stunfisks hiding in the mud.  One tazed my trainer when he stepped on it, and I spent the whole fight trying to calm down the panicked woopers.  I caught one with a pokeball, and her name is Newton.  The stunfisk that ambushed my trainer got hit by an ally’s attacks, and so I dropped a pokeball on it.  Her name is Tesla.  Both of them are pretty tanky, but pretty slow.  They’ve got some neat tricks, and I’m gonna hang onto them for a while.

Finally, there’s Qilin.  I caught him in an amusing way.  Still in the marshlands, we were walking on some docks, and it was getting a little odd.  Tiretracks, little ramps...like a track.  Well, a bunch of Whirlipedes came barreling straight at us, so me and another trainer panicked and threw pokeballs.  Got a lucky capture.  Turns out, we interrupted a race.  So we both let our new pokemon (he also caught a Whirlipede) out to race with their wild friends, and mine ended up winning the race!  He decided I was a worthy trainer, and happily left with me.  He’s slow, but his tanking is amazing, even if he doesn’t have many moves to attack with yet (just poison sting, so far, but he’ll get more moves really soon.)

During a bossfight, we fought the ghosts of a house that burned down.  They were Fire/Grass Trevenant and Phantumps (there’s something called Type-Shifting in this game, pokemon that are basically like Alola Forms but it’s a rare mutation instead of a regional variant).  There were also a couple gastly, and we couldn’t hit them, so I just tossed pokeballs out of desperation.  Caught the full HP pokemon without difficulty due to more lucky rolls!  I gave one each to two of my comrades, and someone also got a fire/grass phantump.

There’s been some other stuff I can’t quite remember.  Umm, there was an ultra-wormhole that opened up in the mall, and we were in the “infinite mall” doing weird puzzles to get out.  A bookstore that involved fighting Unown by finding the books with missing letters, which made the boss progressively weaker as the corresponding “letters” of Unown.  A toy store where we were toy-sized and had to help a trio of toy pokemon (Chesnaught, Greninja, and Delphox) take down a weird machine.  The adventure is called “the Amazing Mawile Machine”.  Basically, a mechanical Mega Mawile constantly spawns little keyturn-mawile bots.  You have to beat the boss to stop the tide.  The three toy heros each took a different path.  Stealthing along a train with Greninja, fighting down the hill to storm the gates with Chesnaught...or a hot-wheels track with Delphox.  I did the track with Delphox with a friend.  It was a surprising amount of fun.  The last store was a fashion show, basically, with fashion police pokemon.  The theme of each outfit had to be “super effective” against the previous, with color/theme corresponding to a pokemon type. A lot more, I know I can’t remember it all.  But it’s been really fun!  I’ll post another time about it.  Maybe after next game I’ll give an update or something.

Anyway, the classes I’m taking are Mentor (they tutor moves and stuff), Researcher (you get 2 “subclasses”, I picked Pokemon Caretaking which makes breeding better or just gives my pokemon a moderate boost to all stats, and Jailbreaker, which lets me modify pokeballs like turning Dusk Balls into “Sun Balls” or “Rain Balls”, or turning Dive Balls into a combination of two other types, stuff like that), Ace Trainer (the most basic class essentially, just focus on making your pokemon battle better or making them fight in peak condition), and eventually I’ll take Normal Ace (which will let me do things to make Normal types better or stronger, and with another feat, I can even Type Shift a couple pokemon to add the Normal type to gain the class’s benefits!).

Phew.  I’m almost out of breath just typing all that.  If you couldn’t tell, I’m really excited by this game.  I’d also rave about the CthulhuTech game I’m in, but that’s...not really a cheery game. XD It’s about horror and insanity, so...maybe another time.

[gravenet]

Brighter news!

I have figured out how to get a Gamecube emulator onto my computer.  I’ve downloaded Pokemon Colosseum, Pokemon XD: Gale of Darkness (the sequel to Colosseum), and Legend of Zelda: Four Swords Adventures.

I don’t think I’ve told anyone here, but I’m actually involved in an RPG with friends called PTU (Pokemon Tabletop United).  I’m playing a somewhat shy nerd who’s really knowledgeable about pokemon and technology.  He is from the equivalent of the Czech Republic, but grew up in the Hoenn Region (gen 3, Ruby/Sapphire/Emerald).  His mother is a Pokemon Marine Biologist (which is more dangerous than the job usually is), and his father is an inventor who primarily works as an engineer and architect for ships and rockets.  He aspires to be a pokemon professor.

He has an ability that basically makes him a living pokedex, where he can analyze a pokemon by looking at it.  He can also customize pokeballs, and teach pokemon moves and abilities as a tutor.

His focus is going to be on the normal type, and the system we’re using actually makes that really viable.  I’m mostly going to use “less popular” pokemon, to some extent as well.  If anyone is interested, I can tell y’all more about it.

[gravenet]

@souviet, @hollowsentinel, thank both of you for commenting on my rant.

It’s been forever.  To be honest, I just...kind of lost my password for a while.  Venting helped a little.  Things are...fairly shitty.  Taking what wins I can.

One of my uncles died of a sudden onset stroke last night, and a not-uncle (you know, family friends that were like family) has Stage 3 Cancer suddenly.  Well, not suddenly in the latter case, but we just found out.

IN BRIGHTER NEWS, I got a Gamecube emulator on my computer, and I’ve found a few games I haven’t played in literally a decade.  Which is another weird thing to measure in decades.

It did mean a lot to have people reply, and welcome me back.  You guys made me almost want to cry from joy and relief because of that.  Y’all can inbox me whenever for my phone number if you want to text.

Next post will be cheerier, I promise.  ^_^;

[gravenet]

I want a pangolin Pokémon :(

[gravenet]

Today I taught myself how to fold a fitted sheet

IMMINENT RANT/VENT.

It’s weird how just learning simple and domestic things is an achievement in adulthood.  It just makes me realize how many things I was never taught.  How my generation is just...full of people like me.  A lot of people my age get excited about learning how to change the oil in their car, or how to balance a checkbook, or how to cook a proper meal...or how to fold a fitted sheet.

My depression is pretty bad.  I’m aware of that, logically.  It’s not just sadness anymore.  It’s mostly stress and apathy.  Anxiety.  Helplessness.

I’m far from independent.  I know I didn’t have “a normal upbringing”, and I was undiagnosed with autism until adulthood.  I was misdiagnosed with almost every disease under the sun until I finally just stopped trusting doctors in high school.  I still remember years of experimental or dangerous medicines to control my ADD and ADHD, until I went to a specialist after I started to refuse to take any medication for it because of all the side effects.  And the specialist said...I had neither.  After a 15 minute appointment, a specialist said “I don’t know why they’ve had you on these medications, half of them aren’t even used to treat ADHD.”

I don’t have a job.  I’m trying.  God I’m trying.  My last job literally expected me to take no breaks, ever, during 12 hour shifts.  It’s not just unethical, it’s literally illegal.  I injured myself twice on the stairs, but that’s less than the rest of the staff in just the couple months I was there.  And it was insulting to be told “but we pay above minimum wage” when I was working full time, but made less than half what it would take to move out into a basic apartment on my own.

I think about death and suicide.  Not attempts, just thinking about it.  I’ve had a few friends kill themselves.  It left a hole.  Some of my friends still aren’t coping well.  It makes me pretty numb to think about it.  But I know I’m not personally capable of committing suicide.  I tried, a few times.  God, that was a decade ago.  It’s weird to measure my life in decades when it comes to things like self-harm or the urge to end my life.  Or the myriad of other things I hope most 14-15 year olds never have to think about.

I feel...useless.  I can’t help my family.  I’ve been a burden on my grandparents for YEARS.  But becoming financially independent is a joke these days.  And I have multiple family members who are actively dying.

My grandmother just got a pacemaker.  Turns out, I’m legally designated as the person responsible for determining her medical treatment in case of an emergency.  I didn’t even realize I’d given permission for them to save her life until two days later, when she thanked me for making the decision.  The weight of that responsibility hit me like a truck.

One of my aunts has cancer.  We thought it was Stage 1 Pancreatic at first, but a week later we were told it’s Stage 4 Liver cancer.  It went from “just a couple surgeries and she’ll be fine” to Chemo, hopes, and preparing her will.  Watching the life drain from family member’s faces from that news was just...

I don’t know.  I want to say depressing, but I’m exhausted.  Emotionally, I’m at my wit’s end.  It’s hard to feel anything these days.

I have a hard time replying to text messages.  Or emails.  Just about anything but Skype anymore.  I want to, but...I just don’t feel it.  I have no urgency.  I have brief moments of alarm where I realize this is probably the depression.  But that’s just how it is.  I’m scared of being in a relationship because what if I just...stop caring about that too?

For now, I need to focus on today.  On doing my laundry, cleaning my room.  Just doing what I can this minute.  And that means that for just a brief moment, I can be proud that today...I learned how to fold a fitted sheet.

Sorry it’s been so long, if any of you cared.  I’m...sort of back.

[gravenet]

[gravenet]

YES

You know what’s never not funny?

FMA03 Scar is just so bishie. He looks like he’s in danger of starting a boy band any second. He’s so delicate. So streamline and alluring. He was an extra in a shojo anime who stumbled on set and they were like “shit man we needed someone to play the vengeful murderer youre hired”

And Brotherhood Scar is just so goddamn shredded. 80% jawline. 15% cheek bones. 5% man pain. Dude coulda bench-pressed Sloth out of the fucking Briggs fortress if he’d just been around for it. Testosterone is ashamed of its masculinity around Brotherhood!Scar. Someone chiseled a block of marble and it started talking and everyone just rolled with it.

How are these two the same character howd this happen I’m just fucking laughing

[gravenet]

...IT BEGINS.

HAHAAHAAHAHAAA

[gravenet]

BWONG BWONG BWONG

[gravenet]

The first Deadpool comic I ever read had a panel in it and somebody asked Deadpool what he looks like under the mask. He said “I look like a cross between Ryan Reynolds and a Shar Pei,” and I knew at that moment, I was like “One day I’ll play this guy.”

[gravenet]

Holy crap brilliant.

Want to cheat off my exam? Sure, take a look.

Years ago in my high school AP economics class I was assigned to sit in the corner of the room where I was flanked by a handful of very popular, very lazy kids. After every exam the teacher would announce (much to my chagrin) my “high score” to the class.

After a particularly challenging exam where I only scored 93%, the teacher announced that the guy to my right (let’s call him Matt) had ALSO scored 93%, his friend behind him 90%, and the friend behind HIM 90%! Needless to say I vacillated between self-doubt and suspicion for a few days before I finally “congratulated” one of the 90%‘ers on his score. With an impish grin he admitted that his friend Matt had been cheating off me for months and “thanked” me for helping “so many people do so well” in the class. The petty revenge gears started turning in my head for what seemed like ages before I replied “no problem, I’m just glad to help!”

At the next exam I put my my paper in very clear view of Matt. He had been told that I was now willing to “help” him and his friends. I circled all wrong answers while making a special mark for the correct ones. Just before the time was up, I quickly changed my answers back when nobody was looking, turned in my exam, and smugly walked back to my seat.

What I didn’t know at the time was that the cheating conspiracy didn’t just involve the kids sitting next to me, but that my answers were written down and forwarded to the next 4 periods, all of which took an identical test.

One week later a record 22 people failed the exam. Matt empathetically remarked “Oh man, did you fail too!?” I flipped over my sheet: 100%.

Nobody ever cheated off me in that class again.

Petty Revenge: Internet`s best petty revenge stories are here. | credit

[gravenet]

i really like looking at google image searches for “firemen rescuing cats” or something because you get super cute pictures like

AND THEN THERE’S THIS ONE

[gravenet]

#notrustissues

[gravenet]

Karma will fuck them.  In a very non-consensual way.  I’m sorry you’re having to deal with this idiot.

Let’s see. Newest allegations against me. 1) I’m “retarded”. I’m autistic, not retarded. Asshole. This means a hell of a lot of things and none of that relates back to my intelligence. Get back to me when you’re the one with a college education lmfao.

2) Yes, my mother went through difficulty with health. But since you seem incredulous (asshole), here’s a fucking SCREENSHOT OF A CONVERSATION.

Personal enough for you, you complete ass turtle?

3) It was not my NEIGHBOR that was murdered. It was a member of my church growing up. (The husband once tipped a bounce house over when I was inside.)  http://www.heraldnet.com/article/20160115/NEWS01/160119322 http://www.heraldnet.com/article/20160119/NEWS01/160118902 http://www.heraldnet.com/article/20160206/NEWS01/160209460 And the image where my mother told me about it: 

And image of where my mother spoke of going to the mother’s funeral yesterday:

4) I’ve got dysphoria, which is consistent with being transgender. But you seem incapable of fucking USING MY PRONOUNS, YOU COMMON VOLE. You know what also doesn’t help someone feeling decent about themselves? Calling them ugly repeatedly. 

5) I’m pagan. Not a witch. Suck my fucking dick, you complete nugwipe.

6) I do not lie, I have no IDEA where this “delusions of grandeur” thing came from. But I need receipts. Post haste. You have mine, let’s see your’s.  Asshole.

7) Either cut this shit out, or tumblr WILL nuke your blog from orbit. If you get enough posts removed, they will. And this is about to go into their report queue.

Deal with it, you complete ass.

PS “illusions of grandeur” isn’t a phrase, it’s delusions. And “shes” isn’t a word. If you’re going to misgender me, at least use the proper punctuation.