gravitasmalfunction - Tumblr blog

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how an automatic mahjong table works

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"guys in a spaceship" is really one of the genres of all time. like no way dude i wonder what they're gonna do in the spaceship this week

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omg imagine being born and you are on a spaceship and everyone aboard is sooo so mad at you just because you burst out of some guy's chest to be born. like um sorry i've not been alive before i didn't even know that's not allowed please be nice to me um the spaceship floor is cold is no one going to knit me some little booties i am calling child protective services

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RIP(?) to my morally ambiguous Republican-era Chinese general dad from my dream last night who mostly reconciled with my dream long-suffering society mother who truly loved him, by taking her to see the spectacular Western-style flower garden at some bigwig's house where we were all attending for dinner, that led to a small beach where we wandered along the sand at the water's edge and laughed as our stiff leather shoes got wet from an unexpected large wave. I was so happy to cling to my hitherto standoffish father's waist and hear him and my mother laughing again! The beach turned into a family reunion and we turned our backs to the water and squished together for a family photograph. I heard a huge wave gathering behind us but I didn't want to ruin the moment so I didn't make a fuss and tell everyone to run up the beach as fast as they could. The water came up to our necks and knocked us off our feet, and when it receded, we couldn't find dream general dad. Dream mother was hysterical. The water had receded to expose rocky shoals off the beach, but there was no sign of him there or in the remaining water. Dream mother and I searched while dream brother begged us not to go out and look for him and hurt ourselves on the rocks. Maybe dream dad had washed out to the inlet and swam to shore and would be waiting for us at home? I remembered his non-committal answer back in the flower garden when dream mother asked him if he was going back to rejoin command, and he just smiled and said it didn't matter. Did he plan this? But how could he have planned it, the wave was a freak accident! Did he spot an opportunity and just take it? Is he really dead or is he just dead to us, his dream family? Dream mother is determined to find him and determined that he should still be alive, if we can just try hard and rescue him. I can still feel his warmth through his uniform jacket where I wrapped both arms around his waist and clung to him the entire time like a little barnacle, not letting go for a second. How can he be gone?

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waves of disrespect

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Carnelian stamp seal featuring a kitty, Minoan, 1900-1600 BC

from The Metropolitan Museum of Art

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universal language

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Send me something to think about

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There’s a Better One in the Shed by Life of a Craphead

“We created two purple things with the restriction that when the bumpy one is shown the smooth one is kept in a shed nearby.”

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Joe Brainard, Straw, 1971

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𝑏𝑢𝑏𝑏𝑙𝑒𝑠 <3

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The impossible did not bother him unduly. If it could not possibly be done, then obviously it had been done impossibly. The question was how?

- Douglas Adams, The Long Dark Teatime of the Soul

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“And what does this chicken do when it arrives at the other side of the road?”     “History does not relate,” replied Kate promptly. “I think that falls outside the scope of the joke, which really only concerns itself with the journey of the chicken across the road and the chicken’s reasons for making it. It’s a little like a Japanese haiku in that respect.” 

- Douglas Adams, The Long Dark Tea-time of the Soul

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when I see something dated 2019 I think “oh that’s not too long ago” and then I remember that 2019 was not only five years ago but those five years have somehow contained several lifetimes

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Teatimeposting

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“Always expecting this and expecting that. May I recommend serenity to you? A life that is burdened with expectations is a heavy life. Its fruit is sorrow and disappointment. Learn to be one with the joy of the moment.”

— The Long, Dark Teatime of the Soul