greygulfh

[greygulfh]

you cannot save me!! i am unsaveable!!! i have never been saved!!!!!!!!

[greygulfh]

i think often about the birds of my childhood church that lived off Eucharist crumbs Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. (Matthew 6:26, NKJV)

[greygulfh]

That. Aged

meow meow meow hiiii jax hiiii umm uh i get rid of the corn!! all of it!! and uhh do u like chocolate? I’ll give you a hot chocolate if you do. not sure if that tastes good in the digital world but worth a try I suppose. here’s my question! : opinions on sheep. are they groovy or glooby

[greygulfh]

ok well I finished I saw the tv glow … for me I think what this movie depicts so well is the deadness you feel before you realise you’re trans. like I kind of thought I was a sociopath before I realised I was transgender because I didn’t really feel like I loved my parents that much and I didn’t really feel joy or happiness. I remember someone asked me once what the best day of my life was and I was terrified because I didn’t have an answer, not because my life was miserable but because I could not think of any moment in my life where joy made any sort of lasting impression on me. I didn’t have many friends or cared that much about the ones I had, I forced myself to be in relationships with men I didn’t like, everything was just pure social obligation. there was this membrane between me and reality at all times and I just thought I was insane for most of my life. I keep thinking about Isabel saying, completely deadpan “I even got a family now. I love them more than anything” and you know how fraudulent and horrifying that statement is. and what threads that needle is her revisiting the old tapes and thinking it all just looked cheap and cheesy, she says “I just felt embarrassed” because she’s so thoroughly suppressed her dysphoria that even the thing that led her to recognising it had no colour or feeling in it anymore. the movie is horrifying and idk if I have anything like coherent to say about it but for me the thing that connected with me the most is how monotone so much of Isabel’s life is. Once Maddy/Tara leaves there’s no colour in it anymore

[greygulfh]

t-shirt that says i watched i saw the tv glow and all i got was this ache in my chest from an emotion i cant put the name to

[greygulfh]

this quote from jack is taking me out

[greygulfh]

An old promo for the Drain Lords episode of The Pink Opaque. Does anyone know if this show is available to stream anywhere anymore?

[greygulfh]

this isn’t normal. this isn’t how life is supposed to feel. if you don’t think about it it can’t hurt you. I found our hearts and they were still beating. there is still time.

[greygulfh]

I Saw the TV Glow (2024)

[greygulfh]

This isn't how life is supposed to feel

irsshawty on Pinterest / I Saw The TV Glow / internetfavorite on Pinterest / kiyogakukai on Pinterest / Spotify on Pinterest / ladycranes on Pinterest / micheallasboard on Pinterest / Ryan O'Connell / norhanelhadry474 on Pinterest / @inanotherunivrse on Tumblr / ??? / Charles Wright, Scar Tissue in "Scar Tissue" / Barbara Kingsolver, The Lacuna / Priyer on Pinterest / vangore on X / perfumebathing on Instagram / marvinandrea89 on Pinterest / @hannahlockillustration on Tumblr / stickybaby on We Heart It / lesedimorapeli25 on Pinterest / Jnkskxm on Pinterest / Jeff Vandermeer, Annihilation / Fernando Pessoa, "English Song", A Little Larger Than the Entire Universe: Selected Poems / Jean-Paul Sartre, Being and Nothingness / MrsandMrStyles on Pinterest / Chuck Palahniuk / justgiveittime on Pinterest / Anaïs Nin, The Diary of Anaïs Nin, Vol. 6: 1955-1966 / Mary Macdonald, romanticizeaquietlife on Pinterest / Gillian Flynn, Gone Girl /

I accidentally deleted my credits while creating this & struggled to find the original creators again as I had already downloaded all of this content. Some of the credits are towards the original creators, but some are just references to where I was able to find the content after deleting my original credits. Please feel free to correct any of my credits if you see one that is incorrect 🫶🏼

[greygulfh]

[greygulfh]

I saw tv glow is like YES the realization you are trans might implode your life and make the world you live in uninhabitable but that will happen anyway if you don’t do anything about it. if you retreat from your own needs and refuse to let yourself resurrect you’re still gonna run out of air and even the tv show that kept you alive at one point won’t be able to bring you back

[greygulfh]

I Saw the TV Glow (2024) dir. Jane Schoenbrun

[greygulfh]

It's been about 24 hours and all I want to know is does anyone have a source for that thing TE Lawrence supposedly wrote to Apsley Cherry-Gerard because if it's real this would be a contender for the most insane Lawrence quote I've ever read, and I've read those letters he was sending to John Bruce.

[greygulfh]

It's been about 24 hours and all I want to know is does anyone have a source for that thing TE Lawrence supposedly wrote to Apsley Cherry-Gerard because if it's real this would be a contender for the most insane Lawrence quote I've ever read, and I've read those letters he was sending to John Bruce.

[greygulfh]

Soulmates exist, therefore, clergymen are allowed to marry since soulmates are seen as gifts from God. In fact, they are encouraged. Names are etched on wrists since birth and Vincent has always had Thomas Lawrence on his wrist.

He loved that name and hoped whoever it was would love him, but he never desired to meet him. War, famine, and poverty was brutal. Kabul was dangerous. He couldn’t bear the thought of his soulmate coming here and dying and was content with merely the thought of him.

Thomas had Vincent Benitez on his wrist since he was 7. He had no desire to meet him. He was sure his soulmate would dislike him. His frigid nature, his doubts, the insecurities- all black marks against his character. Perhaps that was why, when he woke his soulmate up from his nap, right before the Conclave, he did not mention a single thing about the name on his wrist. Despite the fact that it burned and he knew that both Aldo and the man on the chair knew.

Vincent, now Pope, is expected to marry his soulmate. However, not wanting to force Thomas into something against his will, decides he must woo his Dean into falling in love with him. Cue Vincent trying his hardest to get Thomas to love him while Thomas looks himself in the mirror everyday and convinces himself that Vincent could never love him.

* Tedesco and Bellini are engaged and have been for the last 20 year but refuse to tie the not. They love each other but they’re just hateful and toxic about it.

[greygulfh]