gyuto

[gyuto]

What are u most skilled at and how much better are u than others at it

[gyuto]

new egg prime directive you better break that thang

[gyuto]

[gyuto]

by j_kreiss

[gyuto]

this is 40, maybe 50lbs tops...

[gyuto]

"yeah i just need a little whipped cream for my jam on butter toast so I'll just whisk 2oz of cream it by hand" - person who is so normal about cooking

[gyuto]

age regressor at the sphinx: ohh these time tombs are sooo mysterious, I hope the shrike doesn't afflict me with merlin's sickness

age regressor impaled on the tree of pain: this isn't so bad.

[gyuto]

who else plays super tux kart

[gyuto]

and im supposed to, what, pull the shark out of her ass?

[gyuto]

where will people steal their jokes from if tumblr shuts down... dark age for internet comedy

[gyuto]

Oh, okay. I see. You think this has nothing to do with you. You go to your closet and you select out, oh I don’t know, that gaslight gatekeep girlboss meme, for instance, because you’re trying to tell the world that you think modern feminism has been co-opted by corporations. But what you don’t know is that that meme is not from Instagram, it's not from Twitter, it's not from Tiktok, it’s actually from Tumblr. You’re also blithely unaware of the fact that in January 2021, Tumblr user missnumber1111 posted, "today's agenda: gaslight gatekeep and most importantly girlboss." And then I think it was a-m-e-t-h-y-s-t-r-o-s-e, wasn’t it, who reblogged it with an image of the phrase edited over a piece of "Live, Laugh, Love" wall art? And then gaslight gatekeep girlboss showed up in the feeds of eight different Twitter repost accounts. Then it filtered down through Instagram and then trickled on down into some tragic “alt side of Tiktok” where you, no doubt, fished it out of some clearance bin. However, that meme represents millions of notes and countless Tumblr users and so it’s sort of comical how you think that you’ve made a choice that exempts you from Tumblr when, in fact, you’re wearing the meme that was selected for you by the people in this room. From a pile of “stuff.”

[gyuto]

No one on this black mesa tram knows I'm literally snatched under this HEV suit

[gyuto]

9 years ago I had 3 jobs and one was throwing newspapers every night. It was overall a grueling, miserable 3-4 months in my life where I was either working or sleeping, but I do fondly remember the newspaper job. Driving on the quiet, empty streets, pulling up to the start of my route, smoking the biggest fattest bowl I could out of my hand pipe, putting on a great album (Kamasi Washington's The Epic was my go to), and gently rolling through the neighborhood with the cool embrace of the night air. It was towards the start of winter too, so eventually christmas lights went up on most of the houses in my route, such a beautiful experience. There were several donut shops I went to right as they opened, depending on when I would finish. leaning against my car, eating the freshest donuts and watching the moon.

[gyuto]

and hey I don't think anyone who reblogs it is bad or whatever, like no matter how good I get at cooking I still go eat slop. I eat slop quite frequently to be honest. even if I had a million dollars I'd still eat slop sometimes. probably only slightly less frequently.

It's more like. In every restaurant that sets and changes its menu, there are some dishes that the cooks loathe, but the diners love love love it so much that you know it's not going anywhere and it turns into a shit sandwich to you. And there are some dishes that are beautiful and developed with true passion that you're really excited about but it barely sells because the menu description was slightly more complicated than idk, "pasta in a meat sauce" for instance.

This is such a pathetic slop of a post. At least with the brown butter post it's like... that was a veiled insult to people who brag about using browned butter (and say "never too much garlic!" and the like), and those people completely missed that, outing themselves in the tags, letting me enjoy the delicious irony, until even that soured and I edited the original to be king gidorah, and then the ketchup bucket hot dog video, then back to gidorah I think.

This post though is just kinda garbage. I probably wasn't even feeling a little silly when I made it. I was probably aware that it was slop when I made it but now I have to live with this. I edited the original post but everyone demands this slop. this refuse.

[gyuto]

This is such a pathetic slop of a post. At least with the brown butter post it's like... that was a veiled insult to people who brag about using browned butter (and say "never too much garlic!" and the like), and those people completely missed that, outing themselves in the tags, letting me enjoy the delicious irony, until even that soured and I edited the original to be king gidorah, and then the ketchup bucket hot dog video, then back to gidorah I think.

This post though is just kinda garbage. I probably wasn't even feeling a little silly when I made it. I was probably aware that it was slop when I made it but now I have to live with this. I edited the original post but everyone demands this slop. this refuse.

[gyuto]

you best start believing in zoos. you bought one