hardmodezebra-blog

[hardmodezebra-blog]

I was talking to my mom the other day, and she said she was going to start going to the gym, because its important care for your body. I’m disabled w/ multiple chronic illnesses, so going to the gym is impossible for me. She seemed to realize this, and started to backtrack, saying like - its part of taking care of herself, and I interrupted and said, “Its okay mom. You and I taking care of ourselves look very different”. And thats what I would like you to know.

Taking care of yourself looks different. 

For some people, taking care of themselves looks like fruit smoothies and gym visits, cutting out sugar and weight training.

For some people, taking care of themselves looks like hospital visits, feeding tubes and ports. Needles and tests.

For some people, taking care of themselves looks like taking medication and lying down in a cool dark room.

For some people, taking care of themselves looks like getting any calories in their body that they can.

For some people, taking care of themselves looks like adding in more vegetables and trying to go outside to get sun more often.

For some people, taking care of themselves looks like seeing a therapist, keeping symptom journals, and practicing mindfulness, meds, or grounding techniques. 

We all have different needs. Please don’t feel bad about how you care for yourself just because someone else is able to do “more”, or their care is more performative or obvious. Please don’t look down on someone for caring for themselves in a way that you do not. Medication and rest are just as important as exercise and vegetables.

Keep doing your best to care for yourself, the best way you know how. Your self care and health is important, no matter what it looks like. 

[hardmodezebra-blog]

“But don’t let your illness stop you!!!1!1!!”

I’m not “letting” my illness stop me it just plain IS stopping me it’s an ILLNESS it makes me ILL that’s what it DOES.

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Gee do you think maybe there would be more experienced disabled actors if you hired more disabled actors so they could gain experience.

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Self  care is a  priority  not  a luxury

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Say it with me:

I deserve more than the bare minimum.

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I think I’m funny.

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Update: So my right thumb is also starting to do a weird subplex thing like my left ring finger, just randomly popping and locking into place. It’s just super annoying. It mostly does it when I’m trying to pick things up and do things. It’s pretty bad when I’m actually contemplating where to buy finger splits…

[hardmodezebra-blog]

when your eyes match your mask 🌊

today i had another follow up with my neuro. she’s getting me in with a trusted rheumatologist, so thank you universe! she also put me on b12 injections once a week. fingers crossed that this helps with my severe fatigue

[ID: two selfies of me, elle, a white & feminine presenting woman. my red hair is curled and messily pushed to the left side. my makeup is done, with high arched brows, black winged eyeliner, and large fake eyelashes. i’m wearing a light grey t shirt and a blue vogmask printed with waves. in image number 1, i am facing the camera with my eyes looking to the right. in image number 2, i’m facing the right, showing off my profile, while my eyes look into the camera.]

[hardmodezebra-blog]

Being a spoonie means going from “Wow, I really could build a life that would work for me!” To “Fuck I’ve been pushing myself too hard and now I can’t get out of bed and am questioning if I can even keep up with what I had going” in like, 12 hours. 

[hardmodezebra-blog]

Never 👏 Feel 👏 Ashamed 👏 To 👏 Use 👏 A 👏 Mobility 👏 Aid 👏 In 👏 Public

[hardmodezebra-blog]

👏Stop👏Making👏The 👏Struggles👏Disabled👏People👏Face👏About👏Their👏Abled👏Loved👏Ones👏

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Can someone remove my shitty knees. I’m getting tired of the hella discomfort and painish feeling now. Like please stop.

[hardmodezebra-blog]

When playing character: Adult

Abilities granted:

•Talking to strangers

•Making phone calls

•Appearing as though I have my shit together.

Motivation + 5

Responsibility 111

Chore List (♾)

(Wine privileges granted.)

Hot adulting tip: make a “responsibilitysona” and roleplay them when you have chores to do

[hardmodezebra-blog]

Make sure you make a note in your medical file.

[hardmodezebra-blog]

Have you tried vitamin C?

Yes…

Have you tried calcium?

Yes…..

Have you tried green tea?

Yes………

Have you tried rectaly inserting a Buddha to bring your core inner peace and stability?

No???

No? Well that sounds like you’re not even trying to get better.

[hardmodezebra-blog]