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“A touch that was my birthright became foreign” is giving me Everybody Lives AU/Soulmate AU where it’s the aftermath of the gold sickness and Bilbo can’t get over Thorin throwing him over the ramparts. And everybody from Thorin to the Company are trying to tell Bilbo that he’s sorry and he really does love him which is true but every time Thorin touches Bilbo, he just can’t help but feel the horror and terror from almost falling to his death. The sadness that somebody that was basically his other half could hurt in such a way. Ahh I can see it now🫢😭

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loml hits different when you had a guy talk to you constantly about having children, alluding to marriage, and talking about our future 🫢🫨

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Anybody here a Balin/Dori fan?

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I love Bilbo/Thorin and Nori/Bofur but like Bofur/Bilbo has a little something something in it😌

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Do you ever just be like “okay I’m gonna write this, this, and this”, but then you find yourself writing 3000 words to describe character A playing with character B’s hair?

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okay I’m gonna need those two firemen on my fyp to kiss or something

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Why did nobody tell me about Gimli/legolas fanfiction?😫

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Nobody:

Kili and Fili in that one scene where Thorin gives Bilbo the Mithril shirt: 🫵🤨🏳️‍🌈

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What do you mean that the storyline I have in my head isn’t going to magically write itself?!?!

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I love when a fanfiction is a good mix of funny and plot.

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The Hobbit movies are literally everybody just Iike eye fucking each other like what the fuck.

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THORIN WANTED TO FUCK BILBO ON THAT GOLD PILE

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What I want to do: write an all angst/no comfort/no happy ending Bagginshield fanfiction where it starts with the after effects of dragon sickness sticking inside his body makes Thorin paranoid and after somebody (idk who) keeps mentioning what his grandfather did to his One under dragon sickness so he thinks that he will hurt Bilbo more than he already did. Now this is where I bend the story even more cause there is a certain ritual/law put into place that never is really used but under it anybody from the royal lineage could dissolve a bond if there is a case of abuse or abandonment that could cause either harm. In cases of physical harm, the ritual/law is required. The company and his sister try to make him stop from going through it but his stubbornness and symptoms cloud his mind. Fili is especially angry. So Thorin springs this on Bilbo which causes more mayhem. Dis is put on the throne to do the ritual/law. A lot of people in the court are screaming, somebody has to hold back fili. Bilbo is arguing saying he doesn’t want this but Thorin puts down the law. He’s says his peace about the whole thing and Bilbo starts to quietly/strongly cry. He looks at Thorin and says “nothing could have hurt me more than what you’ve done here. I will never forgive you.” . So they go through with it, but they didn’t take into account that Bilbo is a hobbit. The ritual ends up making Bilbo pass out. He ends up forgetting everything romantic about Thorin and he could never fall in love with Thorin again because of the ritual/law. It causes Thorin to feel sad, cold, and empty but he is resigned cause he knows that he can’t hurt Bilbo anymore. Bilbo stays in the mountain under Fili who makes him an advisor. Eventually though, they fall in love and Thorin fines out that Fili wants to court Bilbo. He goes crazy naturally (but not as much as he actually would if he was still bonded with Bilbo). Fili and him get into a fight. Fili screams that Thorin abandoned Bilbo, that this was legal because of the ritual/law, and that all he ever wanted was for Bilbo to be happy (flashback to scene where Thorin remembers that Bilbo said that if it wasn’t for Thorin then he probably would have fallen for Fili). Next proceeds, a scene where Fili asks for Bilbos hand in front of the court cause it’s required for royals or something like that. Cue big romantic scene and court braiding. A couple years pass, thorin keeps an eye on Bilbo but forlornly has to watch the hobbit fall more in love with his nephew. Bilbo and Thorin don’t have a close relationship because of Bilbos memory problems. The others of his company can’t really look Thorin in the eye because of the whole abandonment ritual/law. Cue a hobbit/dwarf wedding, Thorin again has to watch Bilbo look so beautiful. A couple of years pass there’s a battle but Thorin and Fili fight valiantly. Fili even saves Thorin’s life. After the battle they return to the mountain, Thorin thanks Fili then sees Bilbo running into where they are standing. His eyes are wild and frantic. Thorin has a moment where in another universe it would be Bilbo looking for him. But of course that’s not the case, Bilbo runs into Filis arms. They say sweet nothings to each other and Thorin knows that it’s not that universe.

What actually happens:

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So I’m taking a break from writing so tell me why I decided to read The Hobbit fanfiction.

I’ve literally never have ever read The Hobbit.

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I have a boyfriend.

They’re words that take up the very minimal space between them. The noise of the party is muffled in Colin’s brain. All of his focus is on the man in front of him. He watches as Isaac’s muscles tense, the way he’s swaying on his feet not because of the alcohol in his system but because of indecision. The same indecision that had caused whatever relationship they had before to crumble before his very eyes. The same indecision that made Colin leave by his own volition because he wanted something real and somebody who knew what he wanted. He liked his boyfriend but he knew…he just knew that if Isaac where to pull him close… kiss him… he knew it would screw him up forever.

The worst part though was that Colin so desperately wanted it to happened.

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So I made something if anybody is interested

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Kindergarten teacher!Colin and custodian!isaac 🤫🤫🤫🤫