heaththedragon

[heaththedragon]

got asked “why are you open on Easter Sunday?” by a very angry woman at work today…my literal sister in christ it’s because you are also here

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woah. a whole bunch of them.

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Kind of a Reddit AITA post but sometimes it is a little funny to fuck with people in ways that deliberately conform to a stereotype of what they must think of you. the other day I was talking to my friend and I randomly said that I wanted a pet chimpanzee. I'd dress it in person clothes (dungarees and hats) and I'd teach it to love science fiction. And this girl nearby was like "you know how dangerous those things are, right? Also how unethical it is to keep an ape as your pet for your own amusement" and I was already seeing where the conversation was going so I was pretending ignorance like "yea but it wouldn't just be for my amusement. It would have practical points too." And she ignored that statement entirely to say "Well chimpanzees can rip faces off" and I was like. What's the most frustrating thing I can say now. Finally settled on "Mine wouldn't do that though." and you could tell she wanted to hurt me very very badly. Like a chimpanzee would if I had one as a pet

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Quality family bonding time ft. the clockers

this was my half of an art trade with @/Notquitesummer on twt, check out her half here !!

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How the fuck am I supposed to meet a fellow lesbian and then convince her to date me

Don't know anything about lesbians, but maybe if you walked around carrying a baseball bat that'd be really bad ass.

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they should invent tech issues that other people have experienced and solved

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how it feels going from a bdubs hermitcraft episode and to a joel hermitcraft episode

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we should let rouxls kaard deltarune create polycules in other universes i think

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this is so stupid

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This is probably different for different people but for me personally ADHD feels like if you can only carry a cup of water across a room if you’re juggling with your other hand

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Some mean offscreen canon for Legend of zelda: wind waker. They forgot Vaati when they dumped a whole ocean at the end. he’s still just down there.

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That's how they do that

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🎶 workin' 9 to 5 🎶

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dr doodles collection