well i didn’t want to ASSUME the guy who has fangs and weird eyes and is constantly making strange cryptic comments about blood is a vampire. That would’ve been rude.
Terrible early 2000s stoner comedy AU called Weed College (a very dubious pun on Reed College in Portland, Oregon, where the story isn’t even set, probably). Details:
Argyle is a gentle soul who owns a head shop on the main drag of a college town. He lets his friend Eddie play music there sometimes, which proves to be a mistake when Eddie incurs the wrath of conservative Christian frat boy Jason by sabotaging his anti-abortion Christian haunted house on Halloween. Jason and his frat buddies vow to have the head shop closed down.
Jonathan, a stressed-out scholarship student, also works at the shop. He’s worried that his type-A longterm girlfriend Nancy will find out he smokes weed, and also that her douchey ex Steve, also Jason’s frat bro, is trying to persuade her to break up with him. Steve is trying to do this, in fact, and he does so by revealing in front of both of them that Jonathan smokes weed. Nancy is not impressed by this maneuver. She’s like, “Jonathan…I also smoke weed” and takes out a BIG JOINT. They embrace and Steve is moved. “May I try some weed?” he asks, and they say yes. The weed turns him all the way nice and they have a threesome. Also he defects and helps take down the frat.
Robin, a musically and linguistically talented lesbian who just started at college, abruptly goes from lonely closeted girl to (excuse my language) total pussy magnet. Her fun and flirty energy wreaks havoc on Jason’s frat’s sister house, because every girl gradually either wants to sleep with her or hang out with her or at least dress like her. She is literally just trying to study for her Russian final for most of the movie but life keeps happening.
Eddie finds out that Chrissy, Jason’s sweet girlfriend, is a total weirdo who feels stifled by all the conservative Christianity. They fall in love, which brings Jason’s rage to a fever pitch.
At one point, Argyle’s goth girlfriend Eden’s Mormon family visits, so she had to put on preppy girl drag and he has to disguise the head shop as an off-brand Hallmark Store.
As a wheelchair user I'm trying to reframe my language for "being in the way."
"I'm in the way," "I can't fit," and "I can't go there," is becoming "there's not enough space," "the walkway is too narrow," and "that place isn't accessible."
It's a small change, but to me it feels as if I'm redirecting blame from myself to the people that made these places inaccessible in the first place. I don't want people to just think that they're helping me, I want them to think that they're making up for someone else's wrongdoing. I want them to remember every time I've needed help as something someone else caused.
Hannibal is lucky he didn't have to do therapy during a pandemic. Like can you imagine him in a zoom call session going like "Fear and love so often go hand in hand--it is a symptom of the divine" and the person on the other end going "sorry could you repeat that? You froze there for a second" "I said fear and love so often go hand--" "Sorry it's still glitchy. Try again." "I said fear and love--" "You know what maybe I should try hanging up and you call me back"
I just think that would break Hannibal in a new and exciting way
ten years from now there's going to be a brand new type of emo girl whos posting dark edits of bluey saying swear words and doing xanax like they've been doing with hello kitty for decades now. and it's gonna be awesome
i’m obsessed with the mum from ponyo. driving single lane on a cliff edge? drift those turns in your nissan cube. husband has to work an extra shift? tell him to fuck off in morse code. pet fish turned into a child on your driveway? adopt her. town drowned in a tsunami? leave your 5 year old in charge, he’s the man of the house now