heeikeuu

[heeikeuu]

So much to say to this but @boyfhee you absolutely nailed it.

The word exploitation in its definition is the mere act of taking advantage of someone for your own selfish gains.

In this case, the exploiter is HYBE and the victims are Enhypen. Their art is being used to promote AI (that weird ad they used Jake's voice in), boycotted brands (McDonald's, Cadbury, T&C, etc etc), and just overall being used to artwash genocide.

Enha loves being on stage and they love seeing our faces light up wherever they go and that love won't ever fade because it's something special that links us both artistically, like Ni-ki said, love is not materialistic and can not be bought. Or when Heeseung said that while he is forever grateful for any support we hand them, they also want it to be abundantly clear that they want to be recognized as good artists and numbers aren't something they care so deeply about. So you can buy all you want and stream all you want but that isn't love, that's overconsumption at best and you are a consumer in this industry, and consumers have more power than kpop stans think. It is YOUR money along with your time and love that powers this industry.

Healthy discussions are necessary to be held in our spaces and we as a fandom can not keep avoiding them because it makes us "uncomfortable." Being defeatists never saved anybody and some of the language being used by a lot of people like "that's how the industry is" or "they need to catch up" or "they aren't kids" is why idols feel like them resting for 2 seconds isn't acceptable until they are working themselves to the bone— that is not normal. That isn't a healthy worth ethic— that's survival.

And in case this somehow makes any of you uncomfortable, I have been boycotting HYBE and many other companies in and out of kpop due to their deep-rooted connections with powerful and disgusting zionists. If that makes me seem like less of an engene then you are welcome to leave my blog and block me because I have been dealing with immature people here for over a year now. Piracy will never be as evil as a company that uses it's idol's passion for disgusting causes while claiming they care about said idol.

If its "just how the industry is" then be the change for the next generation. Be loud, be annoying, send emails, send trucks, do all that but understand that all that is in vain if you are the first to line up their pockets without having any standards or backbone as consumers.

You're a consumer before you're a fan and before both you are human.

let's put a rest to "let enha rest"

i think they've made it clear by now they will rest when they feel like they need to, as per the most recent interview. however you may feel about that statement, i want to encourage fellow engenes to see this issue from a different perspective because i understand both sides to a certain extent. i also understand that ultimately this topic is a lot more nuanced than it seems on the surface. (i'm not going to adress all the nuances in this post bc if i did i'd be sitting here all day).

i do think it's absolutely okay to show concern when the members do or say something that invokes concern but going forward let's try to do it in a way that acknowledges their autonomy as human beings. in short: don't try to tell them what they should do and don't make it seem like they're incapable of making their own decisions.

as a kpop group they are part of an industry that is often unforgiving towards their humanity and they are constantly scrutinized for the smallest things, so i think the best thing we can do as fans is take a step back and let them do what they think is right for them, regardless of how we feel.

because of the heavy parasocial aspect of kpop we often care very deeply about our ults but sometimes we forget that no matter how much we care, what they do is ultimately not within our control. let's not forget that. what you can control is how you show your support to them, so let's always remember to do it in a way that keeps in mind that they are their own persons and that doesn't put more unneccessary pressure on them.

[heeikeuu]

never-ending cycle of my life 💔

Presenting to you my writing cycle

[heeikeuu]

EXACTLYYY !! WHERE DO I SIGN ?? 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

ii. PRIDE - P. JS

pairing :: lucifer! jay x fem! reader

synopsis :: being the always sweet and innocent girl next door, you were always told you were lucky but what if that luck was just your angel (devil) guardian?

tags :: 5.1k, angst, blasphemy, under age driving, minor yandere tendencies, fluff, pretty graphic descriptions of violence, Jay is a little insane but never harms the reader, oc side characters, one scene of SA (reader escapes), profanity, suggestive, childhood trauma, tekken ref if you squint, gore, reader is a bit oblivious, panic attacks, underage drinking, reader is 18 and jay is 19.

a/n: Second installment of Seven Fatal Virtues is here! Hope you enjoy this because so far this is my favorite child LOL (until I sit with my thoughts for too long cos imposter syndrome is too real.)

"Name?" the hospital room lights fluorescent and obnoxiously bright making you wince.

"Y/n" your voice was below a whisper.

"Age?" she typed the info in a tablet,

"16" You fidget with your fingers

"Any guardian?" She asked carefully,

you shook your head.

"You better thank your lucky stars you survived that crash," another nurse came in and announced in the heavy silence of the cold hospital bed.

You offered an awkward smile in return.

Except it wasn't your lucky stars, it was your unimpressed guardian angel (?) that saved you that night.

Sometimes, you find yourself wishing he hadn't.

─────────────────────

Since that day, Jay has been looking after you but what you didn't know that he was no angel— not any more at least.

After being kicked out of heaven when he was a teenager, he was punished to look after a human and hand her fate to another.

"You are hereby exiled by the Higher Council from Heaven, and for you punishment; you shall lose one of your wings." The elder announced causing loud whispers and fear but Jay remained nonchalant.

"SILENCE." His gavel ringing on the table making the rest of the angel quiet down.

"For your last act of punishment, you will look after a unique human girl and make sure her fate will be handed to the right person. If you fail, you will be thrown to purgatory."

Jay laughed. Actually laughed.

The elder glared at him, not showing a hint of sarcasm.

"You expect me to look after such a low life creature–"

The crowd gasped, no one has ever questioned direct orders from God. ln fact, no one has ever seen him except for Jay who was his right hand.

"ENOUGH" He growled, fed up with the rebellious young boy, "Be grateful for his mercy."

Jay bit his bottom lip knowing he had no other choice. He was then taken away by the other angels.

"I'm sorry, Jongseong." One of his brothers said trembling before he clipped his right wing making blood splatter everywhere but Jay held his screams of agony because the pained look on his brother's face alone was enough to haunt him for a lifetime.

He pushed him through tears in his eyes unsure if they would ever be united again.

Jay fell, with only his left wing and a heavy heart as he descended into his new fate.

It took him a year to adjust to living with humans now. In that year he quietly watched you, his plan was to never make you see him but he had underestimated how bad luck followed you like a charm unwilling to break.

He rescued you just minutes before you lost your life in a crash.

Smoke filled air as the car flipped upside down, hanging on a cliff, seconds away from tipping down. It all happened in a blink to you. One second, your car was hit by a track speeding down, the next, you were in the arms of a boy around your age.

You blinked rapidly, wondering if you were dreaming or dead.

"Are you okay?" The boy asked as he carefully set you both on the ground. You take note of his strength given that he only had one wing. His grip firm but not enough to hurt you.

Stunned, you looked at him like he wasn't real— like any of this wasn’t real.

But it was real and now you watch as the nurses excuse themselves.

"It's a miracle!" They whispered amongst themselves making Jay roll his eyes. Only problem was that they couldn't see him, no one but you could.

The Doctor came shortly after, letting you know that all your vitals were okay only a few minor scratches on your skin from the car exploding.

"It really is a miracle that you survived that crash!" He repeated what the others had told you.

Nodding passively, you just wanted to get out of there. You hated hospitals. Jay noticed, of course he did, his gaze almost never left yours.

"When can I leave then?" You asked.

"Unfortunately, because you are a minor and we are unable to contact a legal guardian, you can not leave." He looked at you apologetically.

Sighing. Great, you thought to yourself.

Bowing, the Doctor excused himself.

"So.. are you some sort of angel?" You looked at the boy, tilting your head curiously.

Jay chuckled but figured out that his real identity should be hidden, even from you.

"Sure, we can go with that," he smiled at you. "Not scared?" He teased.

"Am I supposed to? You don't look scary, you look hot," you teased him back, nudging his shoulder lightly.

"You humans are surely shameless" Jay flicked your forehead lightly.

Shortly after, Jay helped you escape the hospital at night, and that's how you first met.

─────────────────────

Your mother had you at a young age so you never knew who your father was. It was just you and her until she passed away when you were 13.

You worked two shitty jobs to support yourself since. Balancing that and school burnt you out but you couldn't just not work or quit school.

Sometimes, a small voice inside you wants to hate your mother for leaving you all alone but you knew it wasn't her fault. Still didn't make it hurt less.

You had to teach yourself everything, the weight of everyone always depending on you made it impossible to rely on anyone but that was before you met Jay.

People always raved about you being "so lucky" but escaping death by a hair every time felt like a sick and twisted joke.

Despite all of this, you found yourself getting quite attached to Jay. He seemed aloof at times but you knew he was the type to care too deeply and not show it. You also learned that he could control who can and can't see him. Even though he was just your savior at first, you soon became close friends. You grew up together.

He always made sure you weren't doing all the work by yourself even if you were stubborn and hotheaded.

But there were many secrets he hid from you. Like all the times you had a crush on another man, or when anyone tried to harm you that just disappeared. Still, he played along around with you and you were none the wiser.

─────────────────────

It's junior year now and you are more swarmed up than ever with exam prep, and your best friend is begging you to attend the big party happening this Saturday.

Every year, before finals the seniors throw a big party and invite everyone to celebrate graduation.

"Come on, Y/n, please let loose and come with me," Lily gave you her best puppy eyes knowing well you can't say no to that.

"This is manipulation, by the way!" You retorted back but ultimately agreed to accompany her at the party. She jumped at you, "THANK YOU QUEEN." Lily was ever as dramatic but you loved her nonetheless, even when she drags you to lame and over-hyped parties by some unsupervised rich teens.

Jay leaned against the door frame, amusement evident in his face watching the whole ordeal go down for the past 20 minutes.

He didn't have to ask, he would go with you, like always.

Fast forward and it is now Saturday, you were dreading this day but here you are doing the final touches to your makeup and fixing your hair.

"Okay, dress one or two?" Lily stood in front of you.

"They both are cute—" You notice her glaring at you, "—but two is definitely cuter!" You quickly add.

"Nice save" Jay chuckled

"Shut up" You tell him, ignoring how Lily is giggling at you two.

"Come on, lovebirds." She playfully sung.

Rolling your eyes, you grab your purse as she goes to change in the bathroom. You wore a simple black short dress that hugged you at all the right spots. Jay cursed under his breath at the sight, to say you looked hypnotizing was an understatement.

Shortly after, you enter the loud party. It was too packed, the smell of cheap alcohol and bodily fluids made you grimes. Jay had his arm protectively around your lower waist, guiding you away from the big crowd.

His touch grounding you from being overstimulated until Lily dragged you away for a bit. Jay was in the bathroom when he heard two gossiping.

"Yeah dude, he is so getting some tonight!" One of them explained making the other male snort.

"Y/n, right?"

Jay tensed up immediately, hoping it's just someone with the same name.

"Yeah that one, Lily's best friend." He told him.

Jay's jaw clenched, his knuckles turning white. He no longer wanted to hear these idiots continue talking. Stepping out of the stall, he washed his hands before grabbing one of them by the collar.

"What the hell, man!" He shouted startled.

Jay didn't care, his eyes glowed red, staring right at the guy's soul, trapping him in an endless nightmare making him scream in agony before his eyeballs popped, Jay sighed at the blood splattering on him. The other tries to escape but the door was shut no matter how much he banged on it.

"Please don't kill me." He cried pathetically.

"Talk" Jay spat out.

The guy was puzzled.

"Who was the bastard that you were talking about." He asked again, losing his patience.

"D-David!" He quickly responded.

"NO PLEASE—"

Thud.

Jay washed his hands again with a sigh before snapping his fingers sending the two somewhere else.

He exited the bathroom like nothing happened.

You on the other hand uncomfortable as Lily left to get drinks and this one senior won't take the hint. He spoke loudly over the music before grabbing your arm and suddenly pulling you with him, you didn't want to make scene but his grip tightened as you tried to yank yourself away. You were now in a secluded room still trying to get out of his grip.

"Let go of me you psycho!" You shouted angrily. He pulled you closer, trapping you against the wall.

"You asked for it." He quipped.

You kicked his shin roughly with your heels before trying to make a run to the door that opened revealing a furious Jay.

Trembling you ran into his strong arms.

"It's okay, sweetheart, I'm right here. I'm sorry for taking too long." His gaze softened looking at you before looking back at that scum who dared to look annoyed.

Before you could say anything more, that coward sprinted away in fear but Jay knew he would deal with him later. For now you were his top priority.

"I'm sorry," you whispered softly with your head buried in his warm inviting chest.

Jay wrapped his arm around your waist while the other tilted your head carefully to look at him.

"Never apologize, it's never your fault or what crap anyone makes you believe." His gaze gentle and reassuring.

Days later**

Jay watches him like a predator studying it's prey. He didn't want to just kill him— oh no he wanted him to suffer and beg for death.

"Oh don't worry, I'm not planning to kill you yet. " His voice deep and bone chilling, leaving no room for rebuttal.

David was trembling, chained to a chair in a place he has never seen. "W-where a-are we?" He asked in utter fear, the room reeked of flesh and the nauseating smell of impending doom.

"Hell."

"W-what?" The fear in his eyes only made Jay laugh.

"Your biggest mistake was thinking you could touch her and I would let you go. Just. Like. That." Jay's nails grew before piercing his leg making him scream in pain.

He kept apologizing and begging for mercy but every plea was music to Jay's ears as his smirk got wider.

He dragged his sharp claws to the boy's neck, watching him tremble in horror at what is coming for him.

"Which hand did you touch her with?"

"This?" Crack or "this?" Crack

He broke each with a deadly grip. Ignoring his screams of pain echoing through the bloody walls. Looking bored now. Jay stands up straight. Dusting his clothes like this is just a normal Friday night to him, and really— it was.

"WHY DO YOU EVEN CARE ABOUT THAT BITCH." David yelled. Big mistake. His biggest mistake now.

Jay didn't waste a breath before grabbing his jaw forcefully, "you asked for it." He rung back the same words he told you.

Then he proceeded to gruesomely cut his tongue off leaving him unable to even scream.

"Have fun with my pets, they like to play a little..rough." He smiled warmly now as if this situation was normal.

Jay slowly stepped out of the prison cell before whistling for the hound dogs.

"Have fun~" He sung, wiping the blood from his hands before disappearing into the darkness.

"UNH-HNH MMPH" He cried as the dogs approached him with their eyes glimmering like he was their new chew toy, and they planned to keep playing with him for along time.

Present time**

Jay sat with you on the couch, tonight was movie night and you were preparing the snacks in the kitchen when the news channel came on.

"Kim David, grandson of G Crop's chairman has been missing for 5 months now,"

Huh, why do you recognize that name? It's probably nothing you thought to yourself as you set the snacks down, too tired too think.

"and the police has officially decided to close the case and declare his death based on new evidence—" Jay switched the channel and put on a movie instead. A satisfied smile on his lips.

You ended up falling asleep on his shoulder halfway through the movie but Jay didn't mind, not even when you drooled on his favorite sweater.

─────────────────────

"Oh my God, isn't that the guy you liked?" Lily nudged your shoulder playfully pointing at his direction.

"LILY!" You hissed at her for being so loud.

She was pointing at Chris Lee, your typical jock who is a social butterfly and totally out of your league. He was the kind of crush you admire from afar, you had a few growing up.

"I just thought he was cute in freshman year, nothing too serious." You quickly defend yourself, waving your hand at her.

"Remind me whatever happened to the other three?" Lily ponders.

but before you could dwell on how they all suddenly moved away or disappeared in the span of the last two years, Jay conveniently shows up.

"Who are we gossiping about this time?" He leaned a little closer than necessary and whispered in your ear. Pushing him away lightly, you felt your heart flutter at the sudden closeness.

"Your failing grade in physics," you stuck your tongue at him but he just stared at you with a blank expression before flicking your forehead.

It's senior year now and graduation is in a month with finals being your impending doom. Jay has recently been more of a pain in the ass than ever before.

"Bitch." You muttered.

"Hmm?” He looked at you as if daring you to say it again.

"You two are so gross, I'm getting out of here," Lily fake gagged, walking to her last class.

"Why does everyone always think we are together? I mean I literally don't remember the last time I got a cute love letter or confession." You pout, head slumping down the table in utter defeat.

"Don't you literally reject them anyway?" He laughed at you making you lift your head and pout more.

"Not that point!" You shot back.

———

Arriving back home, you finish your night routine and plop on the bed. Your mind unable to sleep without replaying what Lily asked you earlier.

It bugged you that you two never knew what happened to every guy you liked or even liked you. You always convinced yourself that you were just cursed romantically. Sighing, you scream into your pillows, kicking your feet.

Looking at the clock it read, 12:12AM.

Letting out a huff, you decide to text Lily.

You: heyyy

Lovie: what do you want?

You curse her ability to read right through you.

You: can't a girl text her best friend anymore? :(

Lovie: no, not you, now spill !

You: Let's go drinking tomorrow night :)

Lovie: am I seeing from my right ear and hearing from my left eye rn??

You: HA HA, anyways I'm picking you up tomorrow.

The next day**

"So are you sure you aren't a clone from an alternative reality?" She asked you after stepping into the passenger seat. You glared at her.

Sneaking into the club through your fake IDs, you are welcomed by the smell of alcohol and sin.

Sitting at the bar, you tell Lily about your recent worries while downing shot after shot.

"Girl, slow down!" She worriedly called out over the loud music.

"I just don't understand! Am I that undesirable!" Tears of frustration building in your eyes. Noticing this, Lily grabs your arm, dragging you to the dance floor.

Sweet sweet sweet kiss, wa wa wa lunar light

Pump pump pump, piga kkeulhji, it's the night night night, hold me tight baby

god gin gin bami wa, kiss kiss kiss love me now

Lip lip lip You're so sexy, sip sip sip make me empty

The music blaring as you two dance against each other, not a care in the world. Suddenly you are approached by a man, the alcohol in your system making you bolder as you grind on him. Until it felt dirty, until the image of Jay started to haunt you after lying to him about your location. Until the guilt ate you up.

Excusing yourself after the song ended, you return to the bar and froze in your place when you saw who was in your seat.

"Jay?" You slur, still drunk.

The look he gave you sent shivers down your spine.

"What the hell are you doing here Y/n?" He rose from his seat, annoyed.

"Why are you even here?" Your tone coming out harsher than intended making his eyebrows furrow.

"You think you have the right to ask questions here?” He walked closer, "You lied to me, you never do that, what has gotten into you?" His gaze sharp and unforgiving.

You hated how good he looked mad and how it made your blood rush.

"I can take care of myself, I don't need you to nag me or babysit me like I'm a child!" The words spilling from your mouth faster than you could think. Stepping even closer to him, you trip slightly making him quickly grab your waist to steady you.

You also realized you hated how you loved being in his arms.

"Let's go talk home." He pulled you in, carrying you on his left shoulder as if you weighed nothing. "I already called Lily's boyfriend so she will be fine."

Finally putting you down, he opened the passenger seat of his car.

"Get in." He ordered, still feeling stubborn, you fold your arms, ignoring him.

"Y/n."

His deep voice made you shiver but you still didn't budge.

"Fine.”

He grabbed your arm and pulled you into the seat.

"WHAT THE HELL JAY??” You yelp in shock, "I told you I can take care of myself!"

"Then stop acting like a kid!" His frustrated tone more evident now as he took a deep breath while buckling your seatbelt.

The ride back home thick with charged tension. Neither one of you was willing to explain themselves first. Stopping at a red light, you finally turn to look at him again after stealing a few glances, watching his jaw clench and eyebrows scrunch. Biting your lip, the words felt weirdly stuck in your throat.

"Are you going to keep eyeing me like a creep or spill it?" The question was more rhetorical but you still answered with your own.

"Are you the only one allowed to lie now?”

Silence.

"I only lie to protect you." He reasoned making you laugh dryly.

"Protect me?" You continue, everyone always tells me how lucky I am and how I should try to be a little more grateful but I don't feel lucky at all." Your voice cracked slightly but you took a deep breath and continued, "boys avoid me like I have rabies, I tried to end it many times, I fucking wished for it because I was too much of a coward to do it but every single time hey maybe this world isn't forsaken— like a sick joke you come and end those dreams. It's all your fault!" The tears you were holding in all come, flooding your vision.

"You think I wanted this?"

"THEN WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT PARK JONGSEONG?"

"YOU!"

Stunned, you look at him like he is crazy— because truthfully, he is.

"You don't mean that…" Your voice visibly smaller now.

"Try me." His tone holding a dangerous challenge, one that incited you.

He stopped the car at a dark and empty parking lot.

Finally done tip toeing about your feelings, you grab the front of his hoodie and pull him into a heated kiss that was filled with everything you tried to suppress. He was shocked at first before giving in and pulling you on his lap. Neither of you wanted to stop until your lungs screamed for oxygen.

"I hate you." You let out weakly in his arms as he held your hips firmly before his hand went to your hair and pulled you back in. Completely intoxicated on the feeling of your lips and tongue against his. Lips leaving marks on his skin in their awake.

Eventually, you both break apart to catch your breaths.

"Still hate me, angel?" He smirked, all too smug for your liking.

"I liked you better with your mouth shut." You retort, laying your head on his warn chest.

He just chuckled, arms tightening around you protectively.

———

Arriving back home, Jay helps you take the rest of your makeup off before settling in bed with you.

"You're still not off the hook yet." You whisper softly. Sleep slowly overtaking you.

Jay sighed but promised to tell you everything.

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Waking up with a headache, you groan at the light hitting your face, fragments of what happened yesterday all rush to you at once making your face heat up. Suddenly you sit up in a haste and touch your lips, you curse your tipsy brain for being so bold and your sober self now even more for not regretting a single thing.

You remember going to bed with Jay next to you but the bed is empty now, you don't know what overcame you but got up quickly almost tripping on your own feet. Panic setting in that he might be gone, the house was quiet. Too quiet.

What if he left?

What if he didn't mean all that?

What if he regrets it now?

The voices becoming louder each room you check and he isn't there.

You call him multiple times through trembling hands and a blurry vision but it goes straight to voicemail every time.

Did he turn off his phone?

Did he block me?

You text him quickly

You: Jay where are you?

You: Please tell me you are okay?

You: Are you mad at me?

You: Did I do something wrong?

You: Please come back I didn't mean what I said last night. I do need you.

You: Please don't leave me.

You couldn't care less about being pathetic right now. You just wanted him back. Was this also some sick joke the world was playing on you again?

You didn't hear the door open. Jay held groceries in his hand but stopped dead in his tracks when he saw you sitting with your knees against your chest, tiny choked sobs leaving your lips.

"Angel?" He called out carefully before quickly setting down the bags.

"Jay?" Your small voice calling out in doubt as if debating if he was real or not broke his heart piece by piece.

"Hey, hey, it's okay, I'm here." He held you gently but firmly enough to reassure you that he was here. That he was real.

After calming down a bit you felt embarrassed now.

"I'm sorry. I-I thought you left, I thought that you regretted last night and didn't want to see me again." You tell him while sniffling. He felt like slapping himself. "I tried to call you but you didn't respond, not even to my texts." Your cheeks redden, shame slowly settling in. "I'm sorry—"

"Angel, don't ever apologize, okay?" He interrupts you quickly. "I should be saying sorry, I left my phone here and went to get groceries to make you breakfast, I didn't expect you to wake up so early though. Still, I'm sorry, I should've left a note." His gaze sincere and remorseful for causing you pain on accident.

"I was being dramatic—"

"You aren't dramatic, you just wear your heart on your sleeve and I love that about you." He interrupts you again. "Now come on, let's get cleaned up so we can have breakfast together."

Soon you both fall into a rhyme, moving around the kitchen in silence with soft music playing in the background to fill the space. Afterwards, Jay tells you dress up to take you to a special place.

Sitting back in the car, memories of last night make your cheeks turn red as you avoid eye contact. Jay noticed, of course he did. There wasn't anything about you that he didn't know but there was such much about him that you didn't know, and were about to find out.

It was a secluded area of a lake, he held your hand guiding. Soon you both sat down on the fresh grass, the weather was perfect.

You look at Jay and you could've sworn you have never seen him this nervous before.

He took a deep breath, grabbing your other hand, his hands were slightly sweaty now.

"I promised you that I would tell you everything about me so let me start from the beginning." He took a deep breath, silently thanking you for reassuring by drawing small patterns on his hands. "I used to be an angel, I was God's right hand, the only one who was allowed to see him and talk to him. I let it get to my head, I thought of overs as beneath me, even my own brothers and sisters. I saw humans as nothing but nuances."

You listen intently to him, taking it all in, not wanting to interrupt him.

"I— made many mistakes that I regret now but at the time I was too prideful to see through my actions. An angels duty is to serve God and help humans but I let many humans die under my grasp, even ones that didn't deserve it because I couldn't see why God would ever want to save such weak and useless creatures."

"My punishment was to be kicked out of Heaven, then renamed me Lucifer. At first, I thought they just wanted me to eat my own words by looking after you and that they would take me back home after but I soon realized that I wasn't ever going to see my brothers." His voice choked up at the end, remembering the pained look on their faces as they clipped his wing and pushed him off.

"Is that.. Is that why you only have one wing?" You carefully ask. He nods shortly making your heart sting.

"Truth be told, I was scared of humans, I have seen for years how selfish and terrifying they can be. I watched you for a year, the initial plan was to never make you see me but that all went down the window. You always looked at me like I was something, like I was worthy and I let my own ugly desires control me. It's not your fault that guys are scared of you now. I'm no angel, I'm the devil that lets his emotions consume him enough to hurt others. I know I don't even deserve you—"

"I don't care if you are a human, demon, or angel. You're Jay, my Jay. I still love you even if you think you aren't deserving of love." You confess, gaze soft and genuine.

"But I kill people—"

Your brain soon connected the dots of all the times he would be mysteriously gone right around the time any guy you slightly liked disappeared.

"And?" You challenged leaving him stunned.

"You might be unhinged and borderline insane but you never hurt me like the others. You didn't judge me. You didn't always tell me to just be strong or that I am lucky. At first I also hated you for saving me that day. I wanted to hate you but I could never bring myself to do it."

"Y/n.." He pulled you into his chest.

"We both might just be fucked up." You joked lightly before breaking the embrace after a minute to look at his eyes.

"Promise me no more secrets?" You stuck out your pinky making him chuckle before he connected with his.

"Promise." He sealed it with a kiss.

─────────────────────

EPILOGUE

Jay helped set down your boxes down, you decided to move out for college together after being accepted in a different city. You remember breaking the news to Lily first and her chasing you with her shoe crying that you will leave her behind but she soon calmed down and held you.

"I'm proud of you, always. Remember to call me though!" She warned making you giggle as you both cried.

"Sooo, Mr. Demon, are you done?" You playfully called from behind with your hands wrapping around his waist.

"Flattery won't get you out of work" He hummed, hearing you huff. You yelp when he suddenly grabs you and pins you against the wall.

"I deserve some compensation, don't you think so, angel?" He leaned over making you giggle.

———

Even lucifer could have his heart beat and bleed in love.

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© heeikeuu | likes and reblogs are appreciated ♡

TAGLIST: @cutehoons02, @k1ttyjwon, @ewsnup, @imaluvsj7 (comment to be added to the series taglist <3)

[heeikeuu]

very sleep deprived and low key delirious when I wrote the second one so pls excuse any plot holes 💔

[heeikeuu]

ii. PRIDE - P. JS

pairing :: lucifer! jay x fem! reader

synopsis :: being the always sweet and innocent girl next door, you were always told you were lucky but what if that luck was just your angel (devil) guardian?

tags :: 5.1k, angst, blasphemy, under age driving, minor yandere tendencies, fluff, pretty graphic descriptions of violence, Jay is a little insane but never harms the reader, oc side characters, one scene of SA (reader escapes), profanity, suggestive, childhood trauma, tekken ref if you squint, gore, reader is a bit oblivious, panic attacks, underage drinking, reader is 18 and jay is 19.

a/n: Second installment of Seven Fatal Virtues is here! Hope you enjoy this because so far this is my favorite child LOL (until I sit with my thoughts for too long cos imposter syndrome is too real.)

"Name?" the hospital room lights fluorescent and obnoxiously bright making you wince.

"Y/n" your voice was below a whisper.

"Age?" she typed the info in a tablet,

"16" You fidget with your fingers

"Any guardian?" She asked carefully,

you shook your head.

"You better thank your lucky stars you survived that crash," another nurse came in and announced in the heavy silence of the cold hospital bed.

You offered an awkward smile in return.

Except it wasn't your lucky stars, it was your unimpressed guardian angel (?) that saved you that night.

Sometimes, you find yourself wishing he hadn't.

─────────────────────

Since that day, Jay has been looking after you but what you didn't know that he was no angel— not any more at least.

After being kicked out of heaven when he was a teenager, he was punished to look after a human and hand her fate to another.

"You are hereby exiled by the Higher Council from Heaven, and for you punishment; you shall lose one of your wings." The elder announced causing loud whispers and fear but Jay remained nonchalant.

"SILENCE." His gavel ringing on the table making the rest of the angel quiet down.

"For your last act of punishment, you will look after a unique human girl and make sure her fate will be handed to the right person. If you fail, you will be thrown to purgatory."

Jay laughed. Actually laughed.

The elder glared at him, not showing a hint of sarcasm.

"You expect me to look after such a low life creature–"

The crowd gasped, no one has ever questioned direct orders from God. ln fact, no one has ever seen him except for Jay who was his right hand.

"ENOUGH" He growled, fed up with the rebellious young boy, "Be grateful for his mercy."

Jay bit his bottom lip knowing he had no other choice. He was then taken away by the other angels.

"I'm sorry, Jongseong." One of his brothers said trembling before he clipped his right wing making blood splatter everywhere but Jay held his screams of agony because the pained look on his brother's face alone was enough to haunt him for a lifetime.

He pushed him through tears in his eyes unsure if they would ever be united again.

Jay fell, with only his left wing and a heavy heart as he descended into his new fate.

It took him a year to adjust to living with humans now. In that year he quietly watched you, his plan was to never make you see him but he had underestimated how bad luck followed you like a charm unwilling to break.

He rescued you just minutes before you lost your life in a crash.

Smoke filled air as the car flipped upside down, hanging on a cliff, seconds away from tipping down. It all happened in a blink to you. One second, your car was hit by a track speeding down, the next, you were in the arms of a boy around your age.

You blinked rapidly, wondering if you were dreaming or dead.

"Are you okay?" The boy asked as he carefully set you both on the ground. You take note of his strength given that he only had one wing. His grip firm but not enough to hurt you.

Stunned, you looked at him like he wasn't real— like any of this wasn’t real.

But it was real and now you watch as the nurses excuse themselves.

"It's a miracle!" They whispered amongst themselves making Jay roll his eyes. Only problem was that they couldn't see him, no one but you could.

The Doctor came shortly after, letting you know that all your vitals were okay only a few minor scratches on your skin from the car exploding.

"It really is a miracle that you survived that crash!" He repeated what the others had told you.

Nodding passively, you just wanted to get out of there. You hated hospitals. Jay noticed, of course he did, his gaze almost never left yours.

"When can I leave then?" You asked.

"Unfortunately, because you are a minor and we are unable to contact a legal guardian, you can not leave." He looked at you apologetically.

Sighing. Great, you thought to yourself.

Bowing, the Doctor excused himself.

"So.. are you some sort of angel?" You looked at the boy, tilting your head curiously.

Jay chuckled but figured out that his real identity should be hidden, even from you.

"Sure, we can go with that," he smiled at you. "Not scared?" He teased.

"Am I supposed to? You don't look scary, you look hot," you teased him back, nudging his shoulder lightly.

"You humans are surely shameless" Jay flicked your forehead lightly.

Shortly after, Jay helped you escape the hospital at night, and that's how you first met.

─────────────────────

Your mother had you at a young age so you never knew who your father was. It was just you and her until she passed away when you were 13.

You worked two shitty jobs to support yourself since. Balancing that and school burnt you out but you couldn't just not work or quit school.

Sometimes, a small voice inside you wants to hate your mother for leaving you all alone but you knew it wasn't her fault. Still didn't make it hurt less.

You had to teach yourself everything, the weight of everyone always depending on you made it impossible to rely on anyone but that was before you met Jay.

People always raved about you being "so lucky" but escaping death by a hair every time felt like a sick and twisted joke.

Despite all of this, you found yourself getting quite attached to Jay. He seemed aloof at times but you knew he was the type to care too deeply and not show it. You also learned that he could control who can and can't see him. Even though he was just your savior at first, you soon became close friends. You grew up together.

He always made sure you weren't doing all the work by yourself even if you were stubborn and hotheaded.

But there were many secrets he hid from you. Like all the times you had a crush on another man, or when anyone tried to harm you that just disappeared. Still, he played along around with you and you were none the wiser.

─────────────────────

It's junior year now and you are more swarmed up than ever with exam prep, and your best friend is begging you to attend the big party happening this Saturday.

Every year, before finals the seniors throw a big party and invite everyone to celebrate graduation.

"Come on, Y/n, please let loose and come with me," Lily gave you her best puppy eyes knowing well you can't say no to that.

"This is manipulation, by the way!" You retorted back but ultimately agreed to accompany her at the party. She jumped at you, "THANK YOU QUEEN." Lily was ever as dramatic but you loved her nonetheless, even when she drags you to lame and over-hyped parties by some unsupervised rich teens.

Jay leaned against the door frame, amusement evident in his face watching the whole ordeal go down for the past 20 minutes.

He didn't have to ask, he would go with you, like always.

Fast forward and it is now Saturday, you were dreading this day but here you are doing the final touches to your makeup and fixing your hair.

"Okay, dress one or two?" Lily stood in front of you.

"They both are cute—" You notice her glaring at you, "—but two is definitely cuter!" You quickly add.

"Nice save" Jay chuckled

"Shut up" You tell him, ignoring how Lily is giggling at you two.

"Come on, lovebirds." She playfully sung.

Rolling your eyes, you grab your purse as she goes to change in the bathroom. You wore a simple black short dress that hugged you at all the right spots. Jay cursed under his breath at the sight, to say you looked hypnotizing was an understatement.

Shortly after, you enter the loud party. It was too packed, the smell of cheap alcohol and bodily fluids made you grimes. Jay had his arm protectively around your lower waist, guiding you away from the big crowd.

His touch grounding you from being overstimulated until Lily dragged you away for a bit. Jay was in the bathroom when he heard two gossiping.

"Yeah dude, he is so getting some tonight!" One of them explained making the other male snort.

"Y/n, right?"

Jay tensed up immediately, hoping it's just someone with the same name.

"Yeah that one, Lily's best friend." He told him.

Jay's jaw clenched, his knuckles turning white. He no longer wanted to hear these idiots continue talking. Stepping out of the stall, he washed his hands before grabbing one of them by the collar.

"What the hell, man!" He shouted startled.

Jay didn't care, his eyes glowed red, staring right at the guy's soul, trapping him in an endless nightmare making him scream in agony before his eyeballs popped, Jay sighed at the blood splattering on him. The other tries to escape but the door was shut no matter how much he banged on it.

"Please don't kill me." He cried pathetically.

"Talk" Jay spat out.

The guy was puzzled.

"Who was the bastard that you were talking about." He asked again, losing his patience.

"D-David!" He quickly responded.

"NO PLEASE—"

Thud.

Jay washed his hands again with a sigh before snapping his fingers sending the two somewhere else.

He exited the bathroom like nothing happened.

You on the other hand uncomfortable as Lily left to get drinks and this one senior won't take the hint. He spoke loudly over the music before grabbing your arm and suddenly pulling you with him, you didn't want to make scene but his grip tightened as you tried to yank yourself away. You were now in a secluded room still trying to get out of his grip.

"Let go of me you psycho!" You shouted angrily. He pulled you closer, trapping you against the wall.

"You asked for it." He quipped.

You kicked his shin roughly with your heels before trying to make a run to the door that opened revealing a furious Jay.

Trembling you ran into his strong arms.

"It's okay, sweetheart, I'm right here. I'm sorry for taking too long." His gaze softened looking at you before looking back at that scum who dared to look annoyed.

Before you could say anything more, that coward sprinted away in fear but Jay knew he would deal with him later. For now you were his top priority.

"I'm sorry," you whispered softly with your head buried in his warm inviting chest.

Jay wrapped his arm around your waist while the other tilted your head carefully to look at him.

"Never apologize, it's never your fault or what crap anyone makes you believe." His gaze gentle and reassuring.

Days later**

Jay watches him like a predator studying it's prey. He didn't want to just kill him— oh no he wanted him to suffer and beg for death.

"Oh don't worry, I'm not planning to kill you yet. " His voice deep and bone chilling, leaving no room for rebuttal.

David was trembling, chained to a chair in a place he has never seen. "W-where a-are we?" He asked in utter fear, the room reeked of flesh and the nauseating smell of impending doom.

"Hell."

"W-what?" The fear in his eyes only made Jay laugh.

"Your biggest mistake was thinking you could touch her and I would let you go. Just. Like. That." Jay's nails grew before piercing his leg making him scream in pain.

He kept apologizing and begging for mercy but every plea was music to Jay's ears as his smirk got wider.

He dragged his sharp claws to the boy's neck, watching him tremble in horror at what is coming for him.

"Which hand did you touch her with?"

"This?" Crack or "this?" Crack

He broke each with a deadly grip. Ignoring his screams of pain echoing through the bloody walls. Looking bored now. Jay stands up straight. Dusting his clothes like this is just a normal Friday night to him, and really— it was.

"WHY DO YOU EVEN CARE ABOUT THAT BITCH." David yelled. Big mistake. His biggest mistake now.

Jay didn't waste a breath before grabbing his jaw forcefully, "you asked for it." He rung back the same words he told you.

Then he proceeded to gruesomely cut his tongue off leaving him unable to even scream.

"Have fun with my pets, they like to play a little..rough." He smiled warmly now as if this situation was normal.

Jay slowly stepped out of the prison cell before whistling for the hound dogs.

"Have fun~" He sung, wiping the blood from his hands before disappearing into the darkness.

"UNH-HNH MMPH" He cried as the dogs approached him with their eyes glimmering like he was their new chew toy, and they planned to keep playing with him for along time.

Present time**

Jay sat with you on the couch, tonight was movie night and you were preparing the snacks in the kitchen when the news channel came on.

"Kim David, grandson of G Crop's chairman has been missing for 5 months now,"

Huh, why do you recognize that name? It's probably nothing you thought to yourself as you set the snacks down, too tired too think.

"and the police has officially decided to close the case and declare his death based on new evidence—" Jay switched the channel and put on a movie instead. A satisfied smile on his lips.

You ended up falling asleep on his shoulder halfway through the movie but Jay didn't mind, not even when you drooled on his favorite sweater.

─────────────────────

"Oh my God, isn't that the guy you liked?" Lily nudged your shoulder playfully pointing at his direction.

"LILY!" You hissed at her for being so loud.

She was pointing at Chris Lee, your typical jock who is a social butterfly and totally out of your league. He was the kind of crush you admire from afar, you had a few growing up.

"I just thought he was cute in freshman year, nothing too serious." You quickly defend yourself, waving your hand at her.

"Remind me whatever happened to the other three?" Lily ponders.

but before you could dwell on how they all suddenly moved away or disappeared in the span of the last two years, Jay conveniently shows up.

"Who are we gossiping about this time?" He leaned a little closer than necessary and whispered in your ear. Pushing him away lightly, you felt your heart flutter at the sudden closeness.

"Your failing grade in physics," you stuck your tongue at him but he just stared at you with a blank expression before flicking your forehead.

It's senior year now and graduation is in a month with finals being your impending doom. Jay has recently been more of a pain in the ass than ever before.

"Bitch." You muttered.

"Hmm?” He looked at you as if daring you to say it again.

"You two are so gross, I'm getting out of here," Lily fake gagged, walking to her last class.

"Why does everyone always think we are together? I mean I literally don't remember the last time I got a cute love letter or confession." You pout, head slumping down the table in utter defeat.

"Don't you literally reject them anyway?" He laughed at you making you lift your head and pout more.

"Not that point!" You shot back.

———

Arriving back home, you finish your night routine and plop on the bed. Your mind unable to sleep without replaying what Lily asked you earlier.

It bugged you that you two never knew what happened to every guy you liked or even liked you. You always convinced yourself that you were just cursed romantically. Sighing, you scream into your pillows, kicking your feet.

Looking at the clock it read, 12:12AM.

Letting out a huff, you decide to text Lily.

You: heyyy

Lovie: what do you want?

You curse her ability to read right through you.

You: can't a girl text her best friend anymore? :(

Lovie: no, not you, now spill !

You: Let's go drinking tomorrow night :)

Lovie: am I seeing from my right ear and hearing from my left eye rn??

You: HA HA, anyways I'm picking you up tomorrow.

The next day**

"So are you sure you aren't a clone from an alternative reality?" She asked you after stepping into the passenger seat. You glared at her.

Sneaking into the club through your fake IDs, you are welcomed by the smell of alcohol and sin.

Sitting at the bar, you tell Lily about your recent worries while downing shot after shot.

"Girl, slow down!" She worriedly called out over the loud music.

"I just don't understand! Am I that undesirable!" Tears of frustration building in your eyes. Noticing this, Lily grabs your arm, dragging you to the dance floor.

Sweet sweet sweet kiss, wa wa wa lunar light

Pump pump pump, piga kkeulhji, it's the night night night, hold me tight baby

god gin gin bami wa, kiss kiss kiss love me now

Lip lip lip You're so sexy, sip sip sip make me empty

The music blaring as you two dance against each other, not a care in the world. Suddenly you are approached by a man, the alcohol in your system making you bolder as you grind on him. Until it felt dirty, until the image of Jay started to haunt you after lying to him about your location. Until the guilt ate you up.

Excusing yourself after the song ended, you return to the bar and froze in your place when you saw who was in your seat.

"Jay?" You slur, still drunk.

The look he gave you sent shivers down your spine.

"What the hell are you doing here Y/n?" He rose from his seat, annoyed.

"Why are you even here?" Your tone coming out harsher than intended making his eyebrows furrow.

"You think you have the right to ask questions here?” He walked closer, "You lied to me, you never do that, what has gotten into you?" His gaze sharp and unforgiving.

You hated how good he looked mad and how it made your blood rush.

"I can take care of myself, I don't need you to nag me or babysit me like I'm a child!" The words spilling from your mouth faster than you could think. Stepping even closer to him, you trip slightly making him quickly grab your waist to steady you.

You also realized you hated how you loved being in his arms.

"Let's go talk home." He pulled you in, carrying you on his left shoulder as if you weighed nothing. "I already called Lily's boyfriend so she will be fine."

Finally putting you down, he opened the passenger seat of his car.

"Get in." He ordered, still feeling stubborn, you fold your arms, ignoring him.

"Y/n."

His deep voice made you shiver but you still didn't budge.

"Fine.”

He grabbed your arm and pulled you into the seat.

"WHAT THE HELL JAY??” You yelp in shock, "I told you I can take care of myself!"

"Then stop acting like a kid!" His frustrated tone more evident now as he took a deep breath while buckling your seatbelt.

The ride back home thick with charged tension. Neither one of you was willing to explain themselves first. Stopping at a red light, you finally turn to look at him again after stealing a few glances, watching his jaw clench and eyebrows scrunch. Biting your lip, the words felt weirdly stuck in your throat.

"Are you going to keep eyeing me like a creep or spill it?" The question was more rhetorical but you still answered with your own.

"Are you the only one allowed to lie now?”

Silence.

"I only lie to protect you." He reasoned making you laugh dryly.

"Protect me?" You continue, everyone always tells me how lucky I am and how I should try to be a little more grateful but I don't feel lucky at all." Your voice cracked slightly but you took a deep breath and continued, "boys avoid me like I have rabies, I tried to end it many times, I fucking wished for it because I was too much of a coward to do it but every single time hey maybe this world isn't forsaken— like a sick joke you come and end those dreams. It's all your fault!" The tears you were holding in all come, flooding your vision.

"You think I wanted this?"

"THEN WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT PARK JONGSEONG?"

"YOU!"

Stunned, you look at him like he is crazy— because truthfully, he is.

"You don't mean that…" Your voice visibly smaller now.

"Try me." His tone holding a dangerous challenge, one that incited you.

He stopped the car at a dark and empty parking lot.

Finally done tip toeing about your feelings, you grab the front of his hoodie and pull him into a heated kiss that was filled with everything you tried to suppress. He was shocked at first before giving in and pulling you on his lap. Neither of you wanted to stop until your lungs screamed for oxygen.

"I hate you." You let out weakly in his arms as he held your hips firmly before his hand went to your hair and pulled you back in. Completely intoxicated on the feeling of your lips and tongue against his. Lips leaving marks on his skin in their awake.

Eventually, you both break apart to catch your breaths.

"Still hate me, angel?" He smirked, all too smug for your liking.

"I liked you better with your mouth shut." You retort, laying your head on his warn chest.

He just chuckled, arms tightening around you protectively.

———

Arriving back home, Jay helps you take the rest of your makeup off before settling in bed with you.

"You're still not off the hook yet." You whisper softly. Sleep slowly overtaking you.

Jay sighed but promised to tell you everything.

─────────────────────

Waking up with a headache, you groan at the light hitting your face, fragments of what happened yesterday all rush to you at once making your face heat up. Suddenly you sit up in a haste and touch your lips, you curse your tipsy brain for being so bold and your sober self now even more for not regretting a single thing.

You remember going to bed with Jay next to you but the bed is empty now, you don't know what overcame you but got up quickly almost tripping on your own feet. Panic setting in that he might be gone, the house was quiet. Too quiet.

What if he left?

What if he didn't mean all that?

What if he regrets it now?

The voices becoming louder each room you check and he isn't there.

You call him multiple times through trembling hands and a blurry vision but it goes straight to voicemail every time.

Did he turn off his phone?

Did he block me?

You text him quickly

You: Jay where are you?

You: Please tell me you are okay?

You: Are you mad at me?

You: Did I do something wrong?

You: Please come back I didn't mean what I said last night. I do need you.

You: Please don't leave me.

You couldn't care less about being pathetic right now. You just wanted him back. Was this also some sick joke the world was playing on you again?

You didn't hear the door open. Jay held groceries in his hand but stopped dead in his tracks when he saw you sitting with your knees against your chest, tiny choked sobs leaving your lips.

"Angel?" He called out carefully before quickly setting down the bags.

"Jay?" Your small voice calling out in doubt as if debating if he was real or not broke his heart piece by piece.

"Hey, hey, it's okay, I'm here." He held you gently but firmly enough to reassure you that he was here. That he was real.

After calming down a bit you felt embarrassed now.

"I'm sorry. I-I thought you left, I thought that you regretted last night and didn't want to see me again." You tell him while sniffling. He felt like slapping himself. "I tried to call you but you didn't respond, not even to my texts." Your cheeks redden, shame slowly settling in. "I'm sorry—"

"Angel, don't ever apologize, okay?" He interrupts you quickly. "I should be saying sorry, I left my phone here and went to get groceries to make you breakfast, I didn't expect you to wake up so early though. Still, I'm sorry, I should've left a note." His gaze sincere and remorseful for causing you pain on accident.

"I was being dramatic—"

"You aren't dramatic, you just wear your heart on your sleeve and I love that about you." He interrupts you again. "Now come on, let's get cleaned up so we can have breakfast together."

Soon you both fall into a rhyme, moving around the kitchen in silence with soft music playing in the background to fill the space. Afterwards, Jay tells you dress up to take you to a special place.

Sitting back in the car, memories of last night make your cheeks turn red as you avoid eye contact. Jay noticed, of course he did. There wasn't anything about you that he didn't know but there was such much about him that you didn't know, and were about to find out.

It was a secluded area of a lake, he held your hand guiding. Soon you both sat down on the fresh grass, the weather was perfect.

You look at Jay and you could've sworn you have never seen him this nervous before.

He took a deep breath, grabbing your other hand, his hands were slightly sweaty now.

"I promised you that I would tell you everything about me so let me start from the beginning." He took a deep breath, silently thanking you for reassuring by drawing small patterns on his hands. "I used to be an angel, I was God's right hand, the only one who was allowed to see him and talk to him. I let it get to my head, I thought of overs as beneath me, even my own brothers and sisters. I saw humans as nothing but nuances."

You listen intently to him, taking it all in, not wanting to interrupt him.

"I— made many mistakes that I regret now but at the time I was too prideful to see through my actions. An angels duty is to serve God and help humans but I let many humans die under my grasp, even ones that didn't deserve it because I couldn't see why God would ever want to save such weak and useless creatures."

"My punishment was to be kicked out of Heaven, then renamed me Lucifer. At first, I thought they just wanted me to eat my own words by looking after you and that they would take me back home after but I soon realized that I wasn't ever going to see my brothers." His voice choked up at the end, remembering the pained look on their faces as they clipped his wing and pushed him off.

"Is that.. Is that why you only have one wing?" You carefully ask. He nods shortly making your heart sting.

"Truth be told, I was scared of humans, I have seen for years how selfish and terrifying they can be. I watched you for a year, the initial plan was to never make you see me but that all went down the window. You always looked at me like I was something, like I was worthy and I let my own ugly desires control me. It's not your fault that guys are scared of you now. I'm no angel, I'm the devil that lets his emotions consume him enough to hurt others. I know I don't even deserve you—"

"I don't care if you are a human, demon, or angel. You're Jay, my Jay. I still love you even if you think you aren't deserving of love." You confess, gaze soft and genuine.

"But I kill people—"

Your brain soon connected the dots of all the times he would be mysteriously gone right around the time any guy you slightly liked disappeared.

"And?" You challenged leaving him stunned.

"You might be unhinged and borderline insane but you never hurt me like the others. You didn't judge me. You didn't always tell me to just be strong or that I am lucky. At first I also hated you for saving me that day. I wanted to hate you but I could never bring myself to do it."

"Y/n.." He pulled you into his chest.

"We both might just be fucked up." You joked lightly before breaking the embrace after a minute to look at his eyes.

"Promise me no more secrets?" You stuck out your pinky making him chuckle before he connected with his.

"Promise." He sealed it with a kiss.

─────────────────────

EPILOGUE

Jay helped set down your boxes down, you decided to move out for college together after being accepted in a different city. You remember breaking the news to Lily first and her chasing you with her shoe crying that you will leave her behind but she soon calmed down and held you.

"I'm proud of you, always. Remember to call me though!" She warned making you giggle as you both cried.

"Sooo, Mr. Demon, are you done?" You playfully called from behind with your hands wrapping around his waist.

"Flattery won't get you out of work" He hummed, hearing you huff. You yelp when he suddenly grabs you and pins you against the wall.

"I deserve some compensation, don't you think so, angel?" He leaned over making you giggle.

———

Even lucifer could have his heart beat and bleed in love.

─────────────────────

© heeikeuu | likes and reblogs are appreciated ♡

TAGLIST: @cutehoons02, @k1ttyjwon, @ewsnup, @imaluvsj7 (comment to be added to the series taglist <3)

[heeikeuu]

이런 느낌 — type shit

plot :: when you suddenly show them new Korean phrases you learnt

tw :: attempt at being funny, crude humor, just you terrorizing enha for no reason tbh.

note :: I don't even know don't ask..

════════════════════════════

hyung line || maknae line

════════════════════════════

© heeikeuu | likes and reblogs are appreciated ♡

[heeikeuu]

IMPORTANT !!

Hello lovelies, if you are unaware by now Google Docs will start using our drafts to train generative ai! I will be switching to Ellipsus as soon as I can and I urge everyone to do the same! It is a better alternative especially if you are anti-ai in creative spaces.

[heeikeuu]

will start working on Jay's story soon! In the meantime, I might redo my pinned so pls bear with me <33

[heeikeuu]

이런 느낌 — type shit

plot :: when you suddenly show them new Korean phrases you learnt

tw :: attempt at being funny, crude humor, just you terrorizing enha for no reason tbh.

note :: I don't even know don't ask..

════════════════════════════

hyung line || maknae line

════════════════════════════

© heeikeuu | likes and reblogs are appreciated ♡

[heeikeuu]

My Anchor — ENHYPEN

synopsis :: when you are dealing with grief and it's complicated emotions.

tags :: ot7, gn reader, family death, pet death, crying, angst, comfort, animal cruelty mentioned, dui mentioned, panic attacks, depression, suicide mentioned, skipping meals mentioned briefly, minor profanity, green flag enha.

note: I've been in a somber mood lately and keep crying so I decided to channel that to write something. Recommend listening to this album while reading.

Heeseung 🧸 (이희승)

You lost your grandma recently and it's been the hardest for your mother. You refuse to leave her side and became clingier in fear you will lose her too.

Heeseung can tell something was wrong with you. You didn't hang out in group settings anymore, you don't smile as genuinely as before, and he saw the way your light has been dimmed and decided he couldn't just sit and watch anymore.

You were in your own room, drowning yourself in work to avoid everything– even the way your throat tightened in fear you have to stand on day in front of your mother's own grave.

Your phone kept buzzing. It was Heeseung.

"Hey, I'm outside, can you come real quick?"

Confused you get up and open the door to find him holding your favorite flowers and takeout. Suddenly, the tears no longer could stay hidden, your heart spills out in front of him.

"Oh baby, come here." Quickly setting down the things he carried. He held you in his arms as you cried loudly. The kind of cry that was ugly but real. His own heart broke seeing you like this, arms tightening around you, he softly rocked you side by side while cradling your head into his chest.

"I'm scared of losing her too, hee." You hiccupped, chest hurting and voice muffled by his hoodie that was drenched in your tears now but he didn't care about that. He just held you through it and whispered reassuring words to you. He held his own tears, wanting to be strong for you.

Jay 🧸 (박종성)

You were with Jay when you got the call. It was the hospital alerting you that your father had unfortunately lost his battle to cancer. You felt your whole world shatter right then and there.

You broke down completely and started panicking. Jay held you and tried his best to calm you down.

The following days you stood in front of his grave with faces you couldn't care less about. You just wanted your dad back.

You tried your best to remain strong and act like you're okay while holding Jay's hand tightly. He refused to let go of you or leave you alone for a second too long.

But you were only human and soon the tears started spilling out till your throat burned and the sobs became no longer inaudible. You didn't care who was watching. You fell to your knees screaming for the world to bring him back and that this is a cruel joke.

Jay kneeled down beside you, and silently wrapped his arms around you. He knew you needed it. His own tears falling soon because seeing you like this was too painful.

He held your face gently as you both cried and kissed your tears away.

"I love you, and I'm here." That's all he needed to say. That's all he could say because anything else wouldn't make it less painful.

For the next few months, Jay is even more gentle with you and always made sure to remind you that you weren't a burden but the love of his life.

Jake 🧸 (심재윤)

You stood in front of your brother's grave. Putting down the flowers you rearranged for him with Jake's help. He stood a few steps behind you as you laid them down and sat.

"I miss you and I'm sorry." Your voice betrayed you making your vision blur and heart ache. Jake carefully approached you and put his arm around your shoulder protectively, almost as if you were a fragile piece of glass seconds away from breaking but it's okay because he was your glue that always put all the pieces of yourself that you didn't understand back together.

It's been a year since you lost your baby brother but wounds are still fresh. You purposely avoid driving now because you can never forget the look on your mother's eyes when she learned he died in a car accident. It was a drunk driver.

You blame yourself the most because you were supposed to pick him up that day but you canceled last minute due to the traffic and weather. If you had known better...if only..

"It's not your fault, my love." Jake whispered to you. "It never was or ever will be. I don't know where he is now but I'm sure he would hate to see you blaming yourself like this." You looked into his eyes, he gently kissed your forehead and pulled you into his chest.

Letting out choked sobs, you held onto him like he was your lifeline because truthfully, he was. Jake felt his own eyes sting like his heart seeing you blaming yourself for something that no one could have seen coming.

He let you drench all his clothes in tears happily because all he cared about was keeping you safe and warm in his embrace.

Sunghoon 🧸 (박성훈)

Reading the comments. You felt anger bubbling through you, "heaven gained an angel, don't be sad!" "Its just a cat." "im sorry for your loss, God needed an angel."

"BULLSHIT" you yelled throwing your phone away dramatically while flopping to bed to cry more. Your cat was recently killed by some jerks from the neighborhood that kept throwing rocks at it.

Sunghoon opened the door seeing you crying while your phone on the ground. He opened it gently and saw the comments. He felt angry at how people were trying to invalidate you for grieving. He knew how much you adored your cat and had her since you were a kid.

He carefully approached the bed. Rubbing your back, "Shhh, sweetheart it's okay. Ignore them. They are all dumb." You get up to face him with your mascara smudged and makeup ruined, "why is God so cruel? Why her?" Your body trembled as Sunghoon slowly slid you between his arms on the bed, your back against his warm chest.

It was more of a rhetorical question but he stilled answered it. "I won't let anyone be cruel to you anymore." He kissed your head, and you knew he meant every word he said.

You didn't have siblings growing up and your cat was all you had most days especially when everyone around you was busy. You just couldn't understand why anyone would be cruel enough to hurt any animal like that.

You still remember calling Sunghoon, crying that you found her in your backyard limping and bloody after returning from work. Unlike everyone else, he never judged you, he held you and never let anyone hurt you like that ever again.

Sunoo 🧸 (김선우)

Everything was a blur to you. Your favorite cousin that was like a sister to you growing up was found dead in her house. She took her own life.

Your whole world collapsed, body trembling and hyperventilating during call. You don't even remember how or who called Sunoo but he immediately ran to where you were without a second thought.

Your mother held you as you both sobbed, you didn't just lose your cousin but your sister. She was the older sister you never had but needed. She was always your rock, you always told her first about any good or bad news you had but now she was gone.

Sunoo knew you didn't know how to process death like most people. He hated seeing you hurting like this, he had never seen you like this for all the years you had known each other. It was a different type of pain.

You didn't know how to grief like everyone else. Some days you still call her number thinking she's here still. Other days you are weeping uncontrollably, unable to control your breathing– like today.

"Come on, honey, deep breaths, okay? Together." He gently held your hands and coached you through every inhale and exhale until you could breathe again.

"Good job, baby, there you go." He smiled at you gently, fixing your hair and kissing the tears from your cheeks. "Let it all out, I'm here." And so you do. He let's you ruin his white tee with your makeup and tears. One hand rubbing your back while the other gently patted your head.

Jungwon 🧸 (양정원)

You woke up from another intense nightmare. Hyperventilating in fear. Jungwon was quick to wake up shortly after you. He instantly pulled you into his warm and inviting chest, cradling you in his arms.

"What's wrong, cutie? Hmm?" His voice raspy and deep from sleep. You felt so horrible at how often this has happened this month. Jungwon never complained and always held you, reminding you like right now how even if you're a burden you're his burden that he loves and chooses to love and care for.

"I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry." You apologized profusely in a small voice while holding onto him tightly. Scared he might disappear too. You lost your grandpa not long ago and have been having nightmares of losing Jungwon too. You never told him what they were but he never pressured you.

"I'm here, I'm not going away. Promise." He kissed the crown of your head. Somehow, Jungwon always knew what to say and do to calm you down. You hated being weak and seen like this but none of that mattered to your boyfriend who always opened his arms and heart for you.

He always made sure you weren't skipping meals and getting enough sleep. Often scolding you for neglecting your health from overworking. He never raised his voice at you though, he was always soft spoken and tender, making sure that your heart didn't carry all the weight of its hardships alone.

Ni-ki 🧸 (西村 力)

After losing your family dog that you had since you were a baby. You hadn't been feeling like yourself, skipping meals and barely getting out of bed.

Riki hated seeing you like this, and so he scolded you for hurting yourself like this. He didn't mean to make you cry but you ended up apologizing with your head down, a habit you had to hide your tears.

"Hey, hey, baby, come here." His tone less frustrated now and more gentle. "I'm not mad at you baby, I'm just worried." He explained carefully. Holding you in his arms.

You look up at him through your blurry eyes, sniffling while promising you won't do it again. He nodded, "good." He smiled warmly, keeping his embrace tight, you rocked into his arms after a few minutes, calming down.

The sounds of his steady heartbeat, his voice voice whispering silly but reassuring words, and his warmth grounded you. He was the calm to your storm. People often thought he was a jerk or cold hearted but the truth is that he cries with you when pets die in horror movies and whines when you take too long doing your night routine, saying something about him needing cuddles or he will self explode like a rock.

And you loved him, every little part of him, but especially the one that held you and acted silly just to make you crack a smile again. He never cared about what anyone said because to him, you're worth it all. Snotty tears and all.

─────────────────────

© heeikeuu | likes and reblogs are appreciated ♡

[heeikeuu]

On today's episode of did it flop because

A) It's just bad

B) There's no smut

C) Algorithm hates me

Or D) All of the above

[heeikeuu]

i. ENVY - L. HS

pairing :: doppelganger! heeseung x fem! reader

synopsis :: what happens when your sweet and kind best friend that you had a crush on since forever has a doppelganger and you have to come to the acceptance that you may prefer that side of him more?

tags :: 5.4k, childhood bsfs to lovers, fluff, suggestive, angst, college au, heeseung smokes, reader going through an internal monolog crisis, mutual pining, dumbasses in love, tension

a/n: the first installment of the Seven Fatal Virtues series is here! I hope you all enjoy this, I'm slowly trying to practice writing longer fics so please bare with me <3

For as long as you can remember, you and Heeseung have always been joint at the hip. 

You went on family trips together, had almost all the same classes in high school, and went to the same uni. 

Everyone around you knew you two as the inseparable duo. Wherever you went, Heeseung followed, and vice versa. 

But somewhere along the way, the lines of platonic feelings and romantic ones blurred in your vision. 

You found yourself thinking just a little too hard about what to wear, or say around him at times. Avoiding every non-heeseung man like they had the plague. 

They just never understood you like him. 

But now you're older, wiser would be debatable but older nonetheless.

─────────────────────

“Dude, are you listening?” Maki complained for the nth time. 

“Yeah, I'm listening! I'm listening!” 

Silence.

He stared at you with a deadpan face before speaking again, “you were practically drooling looking over Heeseung, be serious here.”

“I wasn't–” before you could defend yourself, Heeseung showed up behind you two as you sat in the uni café.

“Hey guys,” he sweetly called, ruffling your hair.

“Speak of the devil,” Maki whispered teasingly, making you kick his shin under the table. 

He barely contained his groan of pain. 

“Am I interrupting something important?” Heeseung asked worriedly but you quickly shook your head, “don't worry about him, hee. You're welcome to sit with us.” You smiled warmly at him. Deciding to completely ignore how your heart was thumping out of your chest and side eyed Maki who just smirked with a knowing look. Fucking first years. 

You and Heeseung were seniors now and preparing for finals wasn't easy but he was always so understanding and helpful that it made it less unbearable. 

You almost hated it. 

Almost. 

“Anywayssss,” Maki playfully hit the table, “I'll get going now and leave you hags to work. Toodle-oo.” He left before neither of you can say a word. 

You shook your head like a tired mom. 

“That kid is seriously going to make me retire early.” 

Heeseung laughed, the kind of laugh that made you feel warm and fuzzy inside before you slapped your inner voices for being delusional again. He's. Just. A. Friend. Be. Normal. You keep reminding yourself. 

No matter how much you like him, you know you could never risk ruining your friendship over some dumb feelings. 

Fast forward, it is the weekend already and you got dragged by Maki to hang out. He said and I quote, "you're going to grow gray hairs and be bald by 30 if you stay in that room studying like it will save your dead hamster from dying of cancer.” 

You truly wonder what goes on his brain if anything does but you agree nonetheless. 

Finals are in 2 months now, and weirdly enough, you haven't seen Heeseung a lot lately. It wasn't like him to skip classes.

“Riki” you interrupted his hypothetical questions that made next to no sense to any sane human. 

“Yeah?” He was confused by the sudden name change. You only used his real name when it was something serious. 

“Is it just me or have you also noticed how Heeseung hasn't been attending classes all week? We texted a few times but something feels odd..” you finally let out the thoughts that have been plaguing you all week. 

“Now that you mention it..” He puts his hand on his chin. “He's been acting weird lately too. Last time I heard from him, Nicholas said that he hasn't seen Heeseung act so…brash.”

Heeseung? And brash? What in the world? 

Those two words were complete antonyms. 

“Are you sure?” 

“Yeah, according to Nicho, Heeseung was being weirdly out of character and flirting with everyone at the party last weekend.”

Your stomach churned, you hated that you cared who he was and wasn't flirting with. He isn't yours, snap out of it!

Riki must've noticed the look on your face, you never been one to hide your emotions that well. 

“It's probably someone that looks like him though!” He quickly added to reassure you. 

A few days have passed since your talk with Maki. 3 days to be precise. 

You were craving some snacks and decided to run to the convenience store down the street. The sun was setting and your neighborhood was relatively safe but you still wouldn't risk your chances so you picked up the pace a bit. Cursing the sun for setting too fast, the walk was about 10 minutes. 7 if you could help it. 

What you didn't expect was to see Heeseung walking around too but he looked so…different? Something about him definitely felt odd. 

“Heeseung!” You called out to him. 

He turned to look at you, and his eyes gave you chills. He didn't have that sweet, innocent boyish look to them anymore. They felt mature, calculated, and something else you couldn't pinpoint exactly. 

“What's up?” His deep voice gave you chills. 

Okay what the hell? You knew Heeseung had a nice voice but was it always this deep? Shaking the thoughts out of your head you try to act normal. Ignoring your gut feeling. 

“Where have you been?? Did you get sick-”

“Worried about me, princess?” His lips forming a lazy smirk, gaze never leaving yours. 

Okay now you're more confused. Heeseung never called you by pet names– and especially not that one. 

“I'm okayyy, just needed a breather is all.” He spoke nonchalantly before casually putting his arm around your shoulder as you walked, pulling you close. You flinched slightly, looking at him like he grew two heads. “Relax, I don't bite.” He came closer to your ear, “unless..?”

“Heeseung, did you hit your head or something?” Your words leaving your mouth before you could think twice. 

He chuckled, amused by your flustered state. 

“Can't a guy be nice and protect his best friend?” 

─────────────────────

Today was Monday, and Heeseung came to school. Only problem. He was back to being…Heeseung. 

You were starting to wonder if you were hallucinating him the other day. 

Maki nudged your shoulder, “what's up with you today?” 

“Hmm?” You respond dazed a bit. 

“You look stressed, girl. Are you getting any sleep?” He asked worriedly. 

“I'm okay–” 

“Bro, did you hear about the basketball match? Heeseung totally wiped their ass alone” a guy laughed, his friend responded, “yeah last weekend was insane.”

They walked out of sight but you sat there confused. 

Basketball? 

Match?

Sunday? 

You looked at Maki confused, “was Heeseung with you guys all Sunday?” 

“Yeah, why? He stayed overnight at Nicho's.” 

Every hair on your body stood up at that. 

You saw him and walked with him on that day. There's no way you hallucinated something so vivid but you bit your own tongue instead of prying further. 

“Oh just wondering.” You answered shortly with a smile. 

Maki could tell there was something more but decided to not pressure you for an answer so he just nodded. 

─────────────────────

You were absentmindedly cutting veggies for dinner, humming to yourself with soft jazz playing in the background. 

You're interrupted by the sound of the doorbell ringing, confused, you wipe your heads quickly in your apron to go to open it. 

Looking through the peephole you see Heeseung, but he looked different..again. Brushing it off, you open the door. 

“Hi cutie,” his demeanor calm but assertive as he welcomes himself in, hand lingering by your hips like it was just a normal Tuesday for him. 

“Hey,” you cursed yourself for sounding awkward but he just chuckled softly. 

“What are you doing here?” You don't miss the way he very not discreetly eyed you up and down, feeling your cheeks heat up. 

“Can't I just hang out with my best friend?” There it is again. The way he says those words.. almost like it's a dirty secret. 

“Well, at least let me know.” You sigh, resuming to the kitchen, now preparing an extra plate for him. 

He sat there watching you intently. Sharp gaze never leaving your figure for too long. 

“Are you gonna keep sitting there and not helping me?” You turn, crossing your arms annoyed. 

“So bossy,” he steps closer to you now, chest flush against your back. His cologne mixed with his scent making you a little dizzy. “I like it though.” He whispered in your ear before suddenly breaking as if he didn't just make your heart collapse on itself. 

“No funny business Lee Heeseung.” You said pointing at him with the knife in your hand, “Yes ma'am” he dramatically puts his hand on his chest before bowing, eyes still fixated on yours. 

You roll your eyes at his antics but you both quietly move in rhythm. It was quiet but not the awkward kind but the peaceful kind until he occasionally interrupted it with his shameless attempts at flirting. 

You pretend to be unfazed but whatever game he was playing at had you hooked.

After finishing dinner, you insisted on washing the dishes to which he refused. 

“Heeseung, I can do it–”

He suddenly grabbed you, carrying you over his shoulder as if you weighed nothing. Letting out a gasp, you yell at him to put you down. 

“Nope, you will sit here and wait for me to be done washing the dishes.” He sets you down on the kitchen counter. “But–” 

“No buts. Sit.” His low deep voice makes the goosebumps on your skin rise. Letting out a grumble, you let him clean after you two. 

─────────────────────

You don't understand Heeseung anymore. One day he's hot and the next he's cold. 

One day he's assertive and weird and the next he's sweet and innocent. The sharp contrast making you lose your mind as you scream into your pillows in frustration. 

“DUMBASS I HATE YOU” 

“Hate who?” 

You quickly look up and find Heeseung leaning against your bedroom doorway with an amused look. His eyes glimmered with nothing but trouble. 

“Who let you in?” You questioned. 

“Myself,” he answered the question like it wasn't a big deal, dangling the keys you had given him to your apartment a long time ago. 

Letting out a frustrated sigh before standing up, “Heeseung you can't just barge in–” 

“Too bad,” he stepped closer, making your knees hit the bed. You fall into the bed, looking at him like a deer caught in headlights. 

Trapping your head between his arms, he hums, clearly enjoying torturing your poor heart. 

“I just wanted to see you.” His eyes dropped to your lips then eyes again, “can't I?” Tilting his head innocently. Except nothing about this was innocent. 

The words are stuck in your throat as you look at him. Really look at him. 

His soft eyes gone again, something about the air around him carried a quiet dominance that made your breath hitch. 

Snapping out of your daydreams, you push him off of you, not enough to hurt him but enough to make him move a little. 

“Say something, cutie.” He suddenly leaned impossibly closer. His breath smelling of mint and…cigarettes? Wait, since when did Heeseung smoke? 

“Did you smoke?” You blurted out before thinking. 

“Do you hate it?” He studied your expression. 

He was going to be the death of you. 

It's been a month now of this weird push and pull dynamic. Every time Heeseung was back to “normal” he would act as if nothing happened between you two leaving you more puzzled. You couldn't figure it out for the life of you. 

Sitting at the library in the quiet hours of the evening, you decided to go on reddit of all places to find answers for your slow descent to madness. 

“if he's giving you mixed signals, he is a red flag, avoid him!” Is what you mostly got. Sighing in defeat. But Heeseung was anything but a red flag so what the hell is wrong with him? Is it possible for guys to go through a second puberty in the 20s?

Until something caught your eye. Scrolling. 

“Beware of doppelgangers!” It reads making you roll your eyes at the obvious attention bait. 

I mean what kind of idiot–

“if one day they act normal and the next they are completely different with no explanation you might be dealing with a doppelganger.” You find yourself reading more to validate how insane you felt the past month.

“If they act like they don't remember what they told you before or constantly ditch plans almost as if they didn't even remember planning them. Or how they are mysteriously at two places at the same time, you aren't going crazy.”

“Doppelgangers are known to be sly and reveal the inner secrets and feelings of those who they possess. They are a separate body but the same mind.” 

Your eyebrows furrow upon reading more. Suddenly you got a text from Maki, “yo, do you wanna hang out? I'm with Heeseung right now.” 

You decline politely, you need time to think and away from him. Then. Suddenly, a drink was placed on your table. Looking up, you froze. 

Heeseung?

Okay, what the fuck? How is he here if he's with Maki right now who is at least 20 minutes away. There's just no scientific explanation for this. 

“What's wrong, cutie? You look like you have seen a ghost?” He smirks, sitting closer to you, noting how you quickly closed the tabs you were on. 

“Oh, it's nothing, just didn't expect you to be here is all.” You replied shortly, rushed. Looking away from him. You were half panicking now. 

How does he keep finding me? What the hell? 

“Hmm, had a feeling you were here so I got you your usual order. You've been working so hard lately, you deserve a little reward.” He nudged your shoulder, breath too close to your face with a knowing smile. 

For some reason every word that left his lips felt like sin. One that you didn't mind. 

You didn't know how long you could keep dancing around whatever this is. 

You found yourself trapped. Who is the real Heeseung? And is it bad if you like this version of him more? 

He keeps getting bolder each time, his feather touch leaving your mind reeling and skin burning for more. You unintentionally avoid the real Heeseung. Too scared to face him and not sure what is true and what isn't anymore. 

But deep down you wanted to continue this facade just a little longer.

─────────────────────

“Heeseung are you okay? You seem down in the dumps lately” Maki asked him carefully, sensing how tense he has been. 

“I don't know man, I feel like I'm going crazy lately.” He finally confessed. 

Maki and Nicho looked at each other and back at him. Patiently waiting for him to continue. 

“I don't understand why but for the past month she's been avoiding me like I have the plague! We text sometimes but I swear I don't remember typing half of what I send. I just don't know what I did wrong.” He looked at his friends, his eyes unable to hide the hurt he was feeling as he slumped into his seat. Wallowing in his pain like he's been divorced and lost custody of his kids. 

“Heeseung.” Nicholas calmly called his friend. 

“Yeah..” 

“Do you have feelings for her?” 

He blushed before nodding slowly making the other two sigh. 

“Just tell her, man!” 

“No way! I can't ruin our friendship and lose her.” He pouted. 

“At least ask her why she's been avoiding you?” Maki added. 

“Sometimes I feel like there's two of me and I can't understand which is me..” Heeseung muttered to himself.

“What was that?” 

“Nothing nothing.”

Except it wasn't nothing. 

Heeseung walked home alone that night stuck in his own thoughts before he was suddenly grabbed by someone and pulled on an alleyway. 

He was ready to confront the person until he saw who it was. 

“What the fuck?!”

“Hello to you too Heeseung” 

He stared directly at the literal spitting image of himself. 

The him who wore leather jackets, styled his hair with gel, rode a motorcycle and was carefree, the version of him that he couldn't ever become. 

“No you aren't dreaming or on drugs.” He pulls a cigarette and lighter, looking bored. 

“What the hell are you?” Heeseung cursed in his head from his voice cracking. 

“Well, for starters, I'm you– more like another version as you can see.” He gestures to his outfit. “The less loser version at least.” 

“Hey!” 

“Everyone has a doppelganger out there that they eventually meet. And no you can't kill me or you die too.” He smiled at him but it wasn't warm, it was one that made the hairs on his arms stand. 

“Your point?” Heeseung had enough. 

“Back off of her.” He said nonchalantly. 

Her? Who is her–

“Y/n? How do you know her?” His entire demeanor changed, flipping to protective mode. 

“Relax, Romeo.” He purred, finding this all some kind of game. 

“She doesn't know there's two of you out there and by the looks of it, she likes this version more.” He threw away the cigarette, stepping on it before walking closer. 

“Your time is ticking and you're losing horribly.” He laughed at him in a sickening way while resting his hand on his shoulder. 

“Good luck.” He– it– whatever he is told him. No warned him. 

“She isn't yours!” 

“Touché” Smirking, he disappeared into the night. Leaving Heeseung breathless and confused. 

What the fuck just happened?

That night he laid awake, refusing to let some version of him take you away from him.

─────────────────────

Finals were now in about 2 weeks and you were cramming like crazy in your room. Lost in your own little world as you often are. 

Your phone kept ringing, making you sigh. 

“What?” Your voice came out sharper than intended. 

“Woah, relax, cutie.” Heeseung chuckled. 

“Does this man ever take anything serious?” 

You didn't realize you spoke out loud until he unexpectedly responded, “you wound me? You don't think I'm serious?” 

You roll your eyes despite him not being able to see you. 

“Spill it already, I'm busy.” 

Your doorbell rang, “come down cutie.” He said finally before cutting the call. It wasn't a request either, it was a command. Your jaw dropped. He has officially lost it. 

Grabbing your cardigan, you went down to open the door. 

You are suddenly pulled by him. 

“What–” 

He puts a helmet on your head before you can protest and grabs your hand, effectively rendering you speechless. 

“Come on, let's go for a ride.” He flashed his infamous smirk. Totally unbothered by his own absurdity. 

Since when can Heeseung ride a motorcycle??

“Do you even have a license?” You cross your arms. Doubtful. 

He dramatically puts his hand on his heart, “you have no faith in me, you wound me, cutie.” 

“Good.” You replied sharply but you still found yourself sitting behind him as the engine roared into the quiet night. Your arms wrapped tightly around his waist. Praying he can't hear how loud your heartbeats were. 

After a while you arrive at an unknown place where you can view the city lights decorating the skies like stars. 

He helps you out of the motorcycle, his hand wrapped around yours tightly. 

“Where are we?” 

“Somewhere he should've taken you on a long time ago..” He muttered. 

“Hmm?” You tilt your head, looking at him confused with your big eyes and lashes fluttering, the wind only adding more to how angelic you look, and it takes every muscle in his body to not hold you and kiss you right there and then. 

“Don't worry your pretty head about it, princess.” Anddd he's back to being cocky and flirty again making you glare at him. 

You both stared silently at the view ahead. He didn't notice at first but you were looking at him eventually, trying to figure out who or what he is because deep down you knew this wasn't Heeseung. This wasn't your Heeseung. 

“Quit eyeing me like a creep and just spit it out.” He said, interrupting the peaceful moment, his sharp gaze boring into your soul. 

“Heeseung..”

You remember back to that reddit article you read. 

“Doppelgangers are known to be sly and reveal the inner secrets and feelings of those who they possess. They are a separate body but the same mind.”

“What's your end goal here?” 

“And don't act dumb with me.” You pointed a finger at him. He grabbed it gently and guided it to his heart. 

“You.” He answered like it was the easiest question ever. Like it was whatever. 

“I'm serious here” you warned him but your heart was betraying you. 

“Who said I wasn't?” He tilted his head at you, confused. 

Refusing to spare him another glance you looked away but he kept looking at you. Eventually he sighed and grabbed your chin, “look at me, y/n.” It was the first time your name left his lips since he changed and it made your stomach flip. Hesitantly, you look at him again. 

You know this is dangerous, friends don't hold each other like this, friends don't daydream of ‘what ifs’ about each other, friends don't look at each other with yearning eyes. 

The lines blur completely when you find yourself leaning closer to him. Feeling his warm breath against your lips. 

The tension in the air was cut by the sounds of a phone ringing. 

Dazed, you snap out of it and quickly back away, maintaining the appropriate distance because you're just friends. 

─────────────────────

“We have one week left, I'm totally screwing this up anyway.” Maki pouted. 

“If this is you trying to ditch studying at the library again then forget it.” You stared at him like a mom scolding her kid. 

“Come onnnnn,” he shook your shoulder as if you would magically gain more sympathy for the boy. 

“No.” You concluded, gathering your books and stepping out of class. 

“HEY WAIT” you both turn to find Heeseung running, he stood in front of you two, catching his breath like he ran a marathon. 

You have been avoiding Heeseung even more now, refusing to answer his texts or calls after that night. Were you being a coward? Absolutely. 

“Can we talk?” He nervously looked at you, “please?” giving you his bambi eyes that you could never say no to. Damn you Lee Heeseung. 

“Fine.” You coldly responded, making him shiver at your tone. 

Maki quietly excused himself leaving you two alone now in the empty hallways. 

You felt your throat close up. You weren't sure how to approach him anymore. You looked at your feet. 

“Are you mad at me?” He asked, his voice small and unsure. This was your Heeseung, the timid idiot who always made sure to never overstep or hurt anyone. The one who wore his heart on his sleeves proudly and cared too much. 

“Yes.” You tried to keep your tone stern. Not wanting to fall into any more traps. 

“Why?” His voice cracked. 

“Heeseung.” You finally look up and meet his eyes, wide and filled with confusion and hurt. 

The words stabbing at your throat begging to be let out. So many questions and you don't know where to start. 

“Can we talk about this later.” There you are once again running away. Running away from him. 

Turning your heel to walk away, you are shocked when you feel his hand grab your arm. 

“Why do you keep running away from me? Did I do something wrong? Did I upset you? Please just talk to me–”

“Heeseung!” Your voice rising higher. Overwhelmed by the sudden confrontation you no longer hold back what you have been feeling. 

“One day you act cold and the next you act…like…like this! I don't understand you anymore! One moment you act like you want me more than a friend and the next you are back to treating me like we are just friends. What do YOU want from me?” The tears now spilling leaving him speechless. He looked so confused and that hurt you more. 

Of course he doesn't know. You thought to yourself. 

You walk away before you can hear his answer, he stood there shocked and mortified. He wanted to chase after you and apologize but even he wasn't sure anymore of what is real and what isn't. 

He wakes up some days feeling like there's something he should know or remember but can't. 

What is his or not anymore?

─────────────────────

Today is the first day of finals. You and Heeseung haven't talked since. Everyone around you was confused but didn't say a word. It wasn't like you two to fight and not make up the next day. It wasn't like you two to avoid one another. It wasn't like you two to skip classes. It wasn't like you two to not be found laughing a storm in the cafeteria. 

But what was like you two then? Because it seems like neither of you can admit it. 

You haven't slept in days, feeling like a walking zombie. You barely even talk anymore. 

Maki and Nicholas were getting even more worried about you and him.

“We need to do something about those two.” Maki worriedly tells him. 

“But what can we do if they don't even want to look at one another.” Nicholas sighs, frustrated that they can't do much here. 

They watched as Heeseung sat alone in the cafeteria looking miserable and unlike himself. He was always the sunshine and mood maker in every room he stepped in but it's like his light has been dimmed. 

“I can't keep watching him like this either.” Now it was Maki's turn to sigh.

They had given you two space out of respect but they couldn't just watch you both destroy yourselves like this anymore. 

“You look pitiful.” Heeseung looked up from his bed to find him again. 

“What do you want? Aren't you happy you can have her now?” 

He laughed at him, like actually laughed. 

Heeseung's eyebrows furrow, “what's so funny!” He asked, frustrated now.

“We are the same person, dumbass.” He simply responded. 

“But didn't you–” 

“I said that to make you get your shit together and it seems like you're still the same coward you always were.” “How long are you going to keep doing this? Until you die and she blames herself?” 

He can't believe he is essentially getting yelled at by his own self. 

“IT'S YOUR DAMN FAULT SHE WON'T EVEN LOOK AT ME” He yelled back, louder.

“I WAS TRYING TO HELP!” 

“I NEVER ASKED FOR YOUR HELP!” 

“I WISH YOU WOULD JUST DISAPPEAR”

Silence. 

They both stared at one another. 

No one dared to even move. 

“Well. That's too bad.” He spat out suddenly vanishing, leaving Heeseung by himself.

Finals have ended and it is officially summer break season. 

Which meant you no longer had to dodge Heeseung in the hallways and pretend he doesn't exist anymore.

Opening your laptop, you found yourself browsing on reddit again. Going back to that article you found. 

“Doppelgangers can't be killed without you dying in the process as well but they can be sealed. To truly ‘defeat’ one you must come to accept that it is just another version of yourself that you can't erase. It is still you, still your feelings and mind in another form. They are your deep desires that you are too afraid to speak out into the world.”

“Deep desires?” You muttered to yourself. 

“What's your end goal here?” 

“And don't act dumb with me.” You pointed a finger at him. He grabbed it gently and guided it to his heart. 

“You.” He answered like it was the easiest question ever. Like it was whatever. 

“I'm serious here” you warned him but your heart was betraying you. 

“Who said I wasn't?” He tilted his head at you, confused.

Did he really mean that..? 

You felt like an idiot now. 

Somewhere out there Heeseung was reflecting on his actions, having had enough of sitting still and being pitiful. He found himself reading some oddly suspicious article on reddit. 

“Can't be killed?” He whispered to no one in particular. 

The next day he found himself standing in front of his mirror, he was planning to see you again but not before he confronted him– well himself. 

“Oh would you look at that,” speak of the devil. He showed up again with his arms crossed and smirk ever so evident. 

“Are you finally coming to your senses?” He asked. 

“I am.” Heeseung's tone was firm and sure. No longer hesitant or confused. 

“I can't lose her because I'm a coward who can't accept his own feelings like a man. For all my life, I have always done what everyone has told me without any thought and pushed my own desires away thinking they were less important but now I see how that only pushed away the one person I never wanted to lose.”

“If you're a part of myself that I buried deep down, then maybe it's time for me to stop hiding.” He concluded. 

“Well done.” That's all he said to Heeseung before suddenly turning into dust slowly and merging back with him. 

Heeseung let out a sharp exhale at the feeling in his bones. It's like a part of himself was weirdly back. 

After collecting himself, he is suddenly flooded with memories of his other self with you. The memories that were missing from the real him. 

Your smile, your flustered face, your warmth, your scolding, you. It was only ever you from the start. His selfish desire. 

Making dinner, you stare at the stove like it had all the answers to your problems and maybe it did because then the doorbell rang. 

Not sure who it could be at this hour, you step to open it without checking. 

In front of you was Heeseung, with his black hoodie and sweats, awkward smile, and comforting presence. 

“Hi” he broke the silence first. 

“Hey?” You hated that you sounded so unsure of yourself now. Scared that this is another vision and that he wasn't real. 

You wordlessly let him in. He followed you to the kitchen, standing opposite of each other. 

“I'm sorry” he spoke again. 

“I'm sorry I was a coward that confused you and made you think that I…didn't care because I do! I care about you more than anyone, even myself.” He laughed dryly, nervous. 

“I love you– more than friends should and I've been such a coward that I buried it all deep inside of me thinking you deserve better but I guess I'm too selfish to let you go.” 

You let out a breath you didn't know you were holding. Tears building in your eyes. His earnest gaze never leaving yours. 

“It's okay if you don't feel the same–”

“Heeseung.” 

“Its okay if you don't feel the same–”

“Lee Heeseung.”

You step closer and closer, breaking all the walls between you two in seconds as you grab his hoodie. Locking your lips against his. His bambi eyes glowing in the kitchen lighting, shocked. 

Pulling back bashfully. 

“I love you too, dumbass. More than friends should.” You repeat his words from earlier making him smile. 

He grabs the back of your neck, pulling you closer. Needing to inhale the air you breathe. Needing to be as close to you as he physically could. 

You both stand there, lips keeping one another warm. His hands grab at your hips, your bodies merging into one. Finally let out all the things you couldn't say to each other through all these years. 

He carefully places you on the kitchen counter and you both giggle at the memory because in the end it's not that you loved the other Heeseung more. It's that you loved every version of him.

“Can I be your boyfriend?” He whispered softly between your lips. 

“Yes.” You whispered back, hands cradling his face gently before placing a soft kiss on his lips. 

You both smile. Maybe you were idiots all along but you wouldn't trade each other for anything. Okay maybe you would trade him for a caramel glazed donut but don't tell him that!

─────────────────────

EPILOGUE: 

You and Heeseung are now standing hand in hand in your graduation caps taking photos. 

“Heeseung come on we need to take pictures with the others, your girlfriend won't disappear if you leave for one second!” Maki called out exasperated. 

“Yeah yeah!” Heeseung yelled back. 

“Go,” you giggled, nudging his shoulder playfully. 

“Be back princess,” he kissed your lips sweetly before running to Maki and the others to finish taking photos. 

This wasn't the end yet but your beginning together. 

If you love someone, tell them. 

─────────────────────

© heeikeuu | likes and reblogs are appreciated ♡

TAGLIST: @cutehoons02, @k1ttyjwon, @ewsnup, @imaluvsj7 (comment to be added to the series taglist <3)

[heeikeuu]

oh my lord, thank you sm for 100+ notes this is so insane 😭😭

• Scales of Devotion, N. RK

casting :: dragon! ni-ki x witch! afab reader

synopsis :: a cursed young boy grew wings and a horn, failing to hide his new identity he was caught by the villagers' wrath, merely escaping with his life, unbeknownst to him that a young witch would be the one to save his life.

tags :: hurt with comfort (happy ending!), angst, mentions of death, self harm mentioned if you squint, descriptions of blood and violence, low key sylusmc coded (sue me)

wc :: 2.4k

note :: slowly trying to get back to writing so sorry if this is rushed TT

"Demon!"

"Behead him!"

"Monster!"

“Get rid of it!”

They chanted in horror, pointing at the young boy whom they once considered one of their own.

The boy screamed in fear, begging his people to not hurt him, that he wasn't a demon but the horns in his head and the tail he was unable to hide anymore made them point at him with disgust and fear.

They grabbed him forcefully and tried to cut off his horns first. He kept struggling while crying.

Where did it all go wrong? He thought to himself as he bled, but the blood wasn't what hurt him the most, it was the betrayal of his own loved ones.

Riki was the small village's sunshine who would never say no to helping anyone, always listened to others, and never acted out. His mother had passed away during his birth in the forest, leaving him all alone and cold and with no other guardian to look for him well the villagers took it upon themselves to raise him.

Now he looked desperately at their faces, all traces of their familiar warmth being replaced with nothing short of repugnance. The other kids couldn't look at him out of fear.

They kept him in a cage for days, bleeding and scared. There he cried for them to let him out until his throat hurt. They didn't feed him or give him water. They left him there to rot.

He didn't understand how or why love could be turned into hate so quickly.

*BACK TO PRESENT TIME*

"Please I'm begging you, have mercy!" The man cried as he kneeled in front of the dragon.

"Mercy?" The dragon taunted with an unimpressed look.

In a flash, his claws dug deep into the man's neck until he went limp after struggling for a few seconds.

Throwing away the body, the dragon looked at his hands with disgust. He hated being stained with their blood.

It's been centuries of him roaming the earth by how. His immortality was a curse he learned to live- no survive with.

He faintly recalls his childhood but fragments were missing in his memory. He was never really sure how he really escaped the hell that was once his home but since then he never took any chance for granted.

All he remembers is how the village was covered in blood and flames, with his hands stained the same nauseating red and back throbbing in a pain he never experienced before as his wings grew, blurring the screams for help in the distance. He still didn't know how to fly with them, they were bigger than his small body making him limp for months, hiding in the forest. Feeding on small animals until the rage in his chest burned so deep that he no longer knew a life without killing, without hunting.

────

His red eyes lack any emotion, his black claws sharp enough to cut through anything. Even his own skin. The same skin that now carries faint scars of those painful memories. A constant reminder of who he is.

Unbeknownst to him that there was always someone watching from the shadows.

She kept herself hidden.

But he always felt her presence and it oddly comforted him for all these years.

Now he stood tall, wings no longer smaller than his frame, facing the knights that were sent to slay him; a death sentence.

"Surrender!" One of them shouted in a shaky voice clearly fearing for his life as he watched the ground become a blood bath of his own comrades.

Riki says nothing at first, right before his long tail pierces the man's heart. "Tell your king that I'm tired of this child's play." His deep voice rang, making the townspeople's hair stand up everywhere while the knights scurried away.

Unimpressed, he stood there with a blank expression. Until he felt it again. Her scent.

He would never mistake it. His eyes landed on her. She stood there in normal clothes and an unreadable expression. Not one of fear or disgust, no but of admiration..?

For the first time in a long time, Riki found himself hesitating. He blinked and she was gone again.

"Tsk." His wings spread before flying away, shaking the ground beneath him.

────

He finds himself returning, seeking her out. Yet she never stayed for too long. Always disappearing. He started to question if she was just a fragment of his imagination until he felt her touch.

Riki might have been stronger than he was before but he wasn't immune to pain and healing didn't always happen magically.

He found himself exhausted and covered in blood, not sure if it was his own or not anymore. Too tired to figure it out as he laid on the grass after a rough battle.

Then he felt it, her soft touch as she healed him. Casting a spell, the soft golden light surrounding his wounds and yet he found himself immersed in the way the wind blew on her hair, gentle, and how her lashes fluttered as she muttered something in a foreign language that was lost to time.

"Rest" She finally spoke, her voice firm but carried a gentleness he wasn't used to.

Too tired to argue, he closed his eyes.

Days passed and he woke up, finding himself in an unknown room. Looking around he still couldn't bring himself to stand up fully.

"Shit." He muttered under his breath. Beads of sweat collecting on his forehead.

Suddenly the door opened quietly, there she was again. Holding a cloth and a bowl of water she made her way to him. Carefully wiping the sweat from his forehead and body like this was just a regular tuesday for her and maybe it was.

"You don't have to pretend to be asleep you know" She told him after carefully wiping his sweat off.

Preparing to stand up, he held her wrist pulling her to him. "Why are you helping me? Aren't you one of them?" He questioned yet his eyes held no scrutiny.

"One of them?" She echoed, breaking into a smile but it didn't feel genuine, it felt bitter- almost one of disgust. He noted.

"I merely maintain a peaceful relationship with them to protect myself. I couldn't care less about those humans." Her tone spat venom, the same venom that burned in him.

He found himself more fascinated with her, wanting to learn more.

Over the months he noticed she no longer hid away from him like before. The tension between them growing gradually.

"Ouch" He winced, she glared at him before attending to his wounds. "You deserve it. Stop trying to taunt the king already." Her warnings fell on deaf ears as he grinned at her. "Worried about me?" His playful gaze held hers.

"Shut up Riki-"

He stopped.

They both did.

"I never told you my name." He spoke after a few beats of silence.

"Oh, it's time for me to pick up herbs." She ignored him and tried to get up quickly before he pulled her back to him. Their noses almost touching, "speak." He ordered as his gaze never left hers.

"I was there that night.." She spoke so softly that if he wasn't a breath away he wouldn't have heard her. He lets her continue.

"I remember it every night even after centuries have passed. I saw what they did to you.." Pausing, she takes a shaky breath, looking away from him. He gently grasped her chin, making her face him again. Sharp eyes never leaving hers.

"I saw it all and wanted to help so desperately. I tried to- but they didn't listen to me. They soon learned that I was...different too and tried to burn me at the stake but I escaped, not without scars of my own.” She gently lifted her sleeves, showing the faint burn marks. “That night I ran to find you..I couldn't watch them kill you so cruelly." She took another shaky breath, voice cracking slightly. "When we were kids you were always the happy go lucky boy that everyone loved while I was the quiet and grumpy girl that no one wanted to play with. But you never looked at me differently."

He looked at her hurt, a hurt she hasn't seen in his eyes since that night.

"Why," his voice cracked. "Why did you hide from me then?" He finally asked the question that has been quietly brewing in his heart, slowly making him unable to sleep at night.

"I was scared- not of you! Never of you. I was scared of anyone hurting you again.. for so long I thought it was my fault you are like this because they all told me that I'm the reason why you turned into a demon." Tears fell from her cheeks. "They told me that I should die before I turn anyone else into a monster. "

He felt his throat burn with rage for her. For him. For everything.

"I kept watching over you from afar because I cared. I never got close because I felt like a bad luck charm begging to be picked up to ruin someone's life. Then I somehow adapted and now live in the city peacefully without anyone hunting me down and yet...I don't feel right because I know deep down they would never accept someone like me; a witch."

Wiping her tears, she stood up, "but anyways, I seriously need to pick up those herbs" trying to lighten up the heavy air. Riki stared at her, lost in his own thoughts before he stood up too. Grabbing her arm abruptly, pulling her into his warmth.

He wasn't always a man of many words but his actions always spoke louder. He held her like she was the most precious gem, because deep down she was to him. It might be ridiculous but he didn't care when his heart yearned and ached for her.

He held her tight. Making her breath hitch before she wrapped her arms around his waist, careful as to not disturb his wounds.

"No more running away." He whispered to her ear.

So she no longer ran away. Instead, she ran to him. He knew she was strong and capable but that never stopped him from protecting her, just as she has protected him.

But what he didn't know was the true terror he would experience when he sees her bloody and bruised body tied at the town center as the people screamed for her to be beheaded. There stood a knight. Ready to strike with his blade after torturing her for their entertainment. Riki's body reacted before his brain. Running on pure adrenaline and instinct.

His black wings spread lighting flames in their wake, making the people run screaming. "LET GO OF HER NOW." He madly shouted making the knight stand frozen in fear as the fierceless fiend stood in front of him with his claws ready to tear him apart.

Losing control of his powers he begins to claw at the man that was responsible for hurting her.

"RIKI STOP" She yelled, watching him lose control just like he did before. This time, she won't run away. Kneeling on the ground, she coughed blood. Her vision blurry. The stabs in her body burn as she tried to cast a spell. Losing more blood. Riki snapped out of it hearing her weak voice call out to him.

His wings protectively wrapped around her as he held her in his strong arms. "Please don't go yet..." There it was, his soft heart that never really left. She smiled, "just stay here for a second I will get help." He desperately tried to keep her awake. "I'll be okay, I promise. I will heal… just wait for me? Okay?" He stilled, stunned. Not sure what to make of her words but trusting her nonetheless.

Her eyes closed but her pulse was still beating. Wasting no time. He didn't care who was watching as he held her close to his chest before soaring high. Taking her back home.

There he attended to her wounds the same way she did for him. Wiping the blood from her body and keeping his touch gentle. Just like she always did. He didn't really know when or how but she softened his rough edges without ever trying to change him. She never tried to morph him into a box. Through her recklessly and wits he felt the walls around his heart and soul crack day by day.

It was no longer just his heart that yearned for her presence but his soul too. He laid for many nights waiting for her to wake up once more. He would wait an eternity if he had to.

────

Laying on the grass filled with wild flowers. He sighed, looking at the sky with a frown. The hues of the sunset almost felt like it mocked him in his loathsome state.

Then he heard it. Heard her again.

"Stop staring at the sky like it personally offended you, dumbass." He stood up watching her sit beside him with a warm smile. "You.." He touched her cheek, before pinching it making sure she's real. "Ouch! Quit that" She playfully smacked his hand before speaking, "sorry it took a while for me to be back." She offered him a small smile. Making his heart beat out of his chest as he pulled her into his chest. Holding her like it was second nature to him, and maybe it was.

"I missed you too." Her voice muffled slightly from his embrace. Pulling back just enough to look at her face again. "Never scare me like that again." But before she could protest he leaned in, his lips grazing hers in touch so gentle she would almost mistake it for the wind.

"I promise." She sealed it by wrapping her lips around his in a kiss filled with the many words they couldn't speak.

Maybe their beginnings were never meant to be perfect, maybe they were meant to be broken into pieces so they would fit into one whole. Two souls tied to a fate that they never chose, to a fate that they defied to be together. Maybe that's what love meant in the end.

════════════════════════════

© heeikeuu | likes and reblogs are appreciated ♡

[heeikeuu]

Seven Fatal Virtues - Series

🗝 After living an uneventful life, you are suddenly thrown into an unknown place that was neither heaven nor hell, trying to understand what happened to you, you spot 7 large doors ahead of you, what happens when you are tasked to just choose one? And how will you know what awaits you there? Will you finally get the good ending, or will you fail again?

wr :: angst, religious themes, reader is an atheist, suggestive, blood, mentions of killing, violence, death, fluff (trust me), multiverse. (more to be listed)

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤgive me your desire

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤand I will give you my fate

i. ENVY

pairing :: doppelganger! heeseung x fem! reader

synopsis :: what happens when your sweet and kind best friend that you had a crush on since forever has a doppelganger and you have to come to the acceptance that you may prefer that side of him more?

──────────────────────

ii. PRIDE

pairing :: lucifer! jay x fem! reader

synopsis :: being the sweet and innocent girl next door, you were always told you were lucky but what if that luck was just your angel (devil) guardian?

──────────────────────

iii. WRATH - [TBA]

pairing :: werewolf! jake x fem! reader

synopsis :: after your grandmother passed away, you had no family left but a cold old mansion left in your care. Living in the forest alone, you learned to be patient but what happens when you meet a man that was the storm of your calm?

──────────────────────

iv. GLUTTONY - [TBA]

pairing :: vampire! sunghoon x fem! reader

synopsis :: being a hunter wasn't easy but you find yourself between a rock and a hard place when your lovely fiancé is suddenly gone and you are left to look for him.

──────────────────────

v. LUST - [TBA]

pairing :: incubus! sunoo x fem! reader

synopsis :: your best friend always admired you for being fearless and not a believer of the supernatural so what happens when you are dared to cast a spell to summon something otherworldly?

──────────────────────

vi. SLOTH - [TBA]

pairing :: demon! jungwon x fem! reader

synopsis :: top of your classes, top of your grades, the perfect definition of academic weapon until you meet a boy that challenged that, sparking a life long rivalry that leaves behind many unspoken truths.

──────────────────────

vii. GREED - [TBA]

pairing :: dragon! ni-ki x fem! reader

synopsis :: you weren't used to always being selfish or greedy, and he wasn't used to being selfless or charitable, so what could possibly bring you two together?

──────────────────────

© heeikeuu | likes and reblogs are appreciated ♡

A/N: hi lovelies! This is my first ever series and it has been sitting in my notes collecting dust for so long so here I am now facing my fears and officially putting it out there. If you would like to be tagged for updates in the future please let me know in the comments <3 I also apologize in advance if updates aren't that frequent, I still haven't fully written everything past notes but I'm too excited to not share it early, hope it gets enough love <3

[heeikeuu]

there aren't any if barely enough sunoo fics out there and that has me determined to fix said issue because WHAT? I also really hate how some ppl keep friendzoning the man too like pls stop making him sound like my gay bestie if he's supposed to be playing my bf in said fic 💔 im not saying you can't be besties with your man but let's think outside the box pls pls pls

(this is not me being a homophobe or inviting any hate here btw I'm queer believe it or not)

[heeikeuu]

• Scales of Devotion, N. RK

casting :: dragon! ni-ki x witch! afab reader

synopsis :: a cursed young boy grew wings and a horn, failing to hide his new identity he was caught by the villagers' wrath, merely escaping with his life, unbeknownst to him that a young witch would be the one to save his life.

tags :: hurt with comfort (happy ending!), angst, mentions of death, self harm mentioned if you squint, descriptions of blood and violence, low key sylusmc coded (sue me)

wc :: 2.4k

note :: slowly trying to get back to writing so sorry if this is rushed TT

"Demon!"

"Behead him!"

"Monster!"

“Get rid of it!”

They chanted in horror, pointing at the young boy whom they once considered one of their own.

The boy screamed in fear, begging his people to not hurt him, that he wasn't a demon but the horns in his head and the tail he was unable to hide anymore made them point at him with disgust and fear.

They grabbed him forcefully and tried to cut off his horns first. He kept struggling while crying.

Where did it all go wrong? He thought to himself as he bled, but the blood wasn't what hurt him the most, it was the betrayal of his own loved ones.

Riki was the small village's sunshine who would never say no to helping anyone, always listened to others, and never acted out. His mother had passed away during his birth in the forest, leaving him all alone and cold and with no other guardian to look for him well the villagers took it upon themselves to raise him.

Now he looked desperately at their faces, all traces of their familiar warmth being replaced with nothing short of repugnance. The other kids couldn't look at him out of fear.

They kept him in a cage for days, bleeding and scared. There he cried for them to let him out until his throat hurt. They didn't feed him or give him water. They left him there to rot.

He didn't understand how or why love could be turned into hate so quickly.

*BACK TO PRESENT TIME*

"Please I'm begging you, have mercy!" The man cried as he kneeled in front of the dragon.

"Mercy?" The dragon taunted with an unimpressed look.

In a flash, his claws dug deep into the man's neck until he went limp after struggling for a few seconds.

Throwing away the body, the dragon looked at his hands with disgust. He hated being stained with their blood.

It's been centuries of him roaming the earth by how. His immortality was a curse he learned to live- no survive with.

He faintly recalls his childhood but fragments were missing in his memory. He was never really sure how he really escaped the hell that was once his home but since then he never took any chance for granted.

All he remembers is how the village was covered in blood and flames, with his hands stained the same nauseating red and back throbbing in a pain he never experienced before as his wings grew, blurring the screams for help in the distance. He still didn't know how to fly with them, they were bigger than his small body making him limp for months, hiding in the forest. Feeding on small animals until the rage in his chest burned so deep that he no longer knew a life without killing, without hunting.

────

His red eyes lack any emotion, his black claws sharp enough to cut through anything. Even his own skin. The same skin that now carries faint scars of those painful memories. A constant reminder of who he is.

Unbeknownst to him that there was always someone watching from the shadows.

She kept herself hidden.

But he always felt her presence and it oddly comforted him for all these years.

Now he stood tall, wings no longer smaller than his frame, facing the knights that were sent to slay him; a death sentence.

"Surrender!" One of them shouted in a shaky voice clearly fearing for his life as he watched the ground become a blood bath of his own comrades.

Riki says nothing at first, right before his long tail pierces the man's heart. "Tell your king that I'm tired of this child's play." His deep voice rang, making the townspeople's hair stand up everywhere while the knights scurried away.

Unimpressed, he stood there with a blank expression. Until he felt it again. Her scent.

He would never mistake it. His eyes landed on her. She stood there in normal clothes and an unreadable expression. Not one of fear or disgust, no but of admiration..?

For the first time in a long time, Riki found himself hesitating. He blinked and she was gone again.

"Tsk." His wings spread before flying away, shaking the ground beneath him.

────

He finds himself returning, seeking her out. Yet she never stayed for too long. Always disappearing. He started to question if she was just a fragment of his imagination until he felt her touch.

Riki might have been stronger than he was before but he wasn't immune to pain and healing didn't always happen magically.

He found himself exhausted and covered in blood, not sure if it was his own or not anymore. Too tired to figure it out as he laid on the grass after a rough battle.

Then he felt it, her soft touch as she healed him. Casting a spell, the soft golden light surrounding his wounds and yet he found himself immersed in the way the wind blew on her hair, gentle, and how her lashes fluttered as she muttered something in a foreign language that was lost to time.

"Rest" She finally spoke, her voice firm but carried a gentleness he wasn't used to.

Too tired to argue, he closed his eyes.

Days passed and he woke up, finding himself in an unknown room. Looking around he still couldn't bring himself to stand up fully.

"Shit." He muttered under his breath. Beads of sweat collecting on his forehead.

Suddenly the door opened quietly, there she was again. Holding a cloth and a bowl of water she made her way to him. Carefully wiping the sweat from his forehead and body like this was just a regular tuesday for her and maybe it was.

"You don't have to pretend to be asleep you know" She told him after carefully wiping his sweat off.

Preparing to stand up, he held her wrist pulling her to him. "Why are you helping me? Aren't you one of them?" He questioned yet his eyes held no scrutiny.

"One of them?" She echoed, breaking into a smile but it didn't feel genuine, it felt bitter- almost one of disgust. He noted.

"I merely maintain a peaceful relationship with them to protect myself. I couldn't care less about those humans." Her tone spat venom, the same venom that burned in him.

He found himself more fascinated with her, wanting to learn more.

Over the months he noticed she no longer hid away from him like before. The tension between them growing gradually.

"Ouch" He winced, she glared at him before attending to his wounds. "You deserve it. Stop trying to taunt the king already." Her warnings fell on deaf ears as he grinned at her. "Worried about me?" His playful gaze held hers.

"Shut up Riki-"

He stopped.

They both did.

"I never told you my name." He spoke after a few beats of silence.

"Oh, it's time for me to pick up herbs." She ignored him and tried to get up quickly before he pulled her back to him. Their noses almost touching, "speak." He ordered as his gaze never left hers.

"I was there that night.." She spoke so softly that if he wasn't a breath away he wouldn't have heard her. He lets her continue.

"I remember it every night even after centuries have passed. I saw what they did to you.." Pausing, she takes a shaky breath, looking away from him. He gently grasped her chin, making her face him again. Sharp eyes never leaving hers.

"I saw it all and wanted to help so desperately. I tried to- but they didn't listen to me. They soon learned that I was...different too and tried to burn me at the stake but I escaped, not without scars of my own.” She gently lifted her sleeves, showing the faint burn marks. “That night I ran to find you..I couldn't watch them kill you so cruelly." She took another shaky breath, voice cracking slightly. "When we were kids you were always the happy go lucky boy that everyone loved while I was the quiet and grumpy girl that no one wanted to play with. But you never looked at me differently."

He looked at her hurt, a hurt she hasn't seen in his eyes since that night.

"Why," his voice cracked. "Why did you hide from me then?" He finally asked the question that has been quietly brewing in his heart, slowly making him unable to sleep at night.

"I was scared- not of you! Never of you. I was scared of anyone hurting you again.. for so long I thought it was my fault you are like this because they all told me that I'm the reason why you turned into a demon." Tears fell from her cheeks. "They told me that I should die before I turn anyone else into a monster. "

He felt his throat burn with rage for her. For him. For everything.

"I kept watching over you from afar because I cared. I never got close because I felt like a bad luck charm begging to be picked up to ruin someone's life. Then I somehow adapted and now live in the city peacefully without anyone hunting me down and yet...I don't feel right because I know deep down they would never accept someone like me; a witch."

Wiping her tears, she stood up, "but anyways, I seriously need to pick up those herbs" trying to lighten up the heavy air. Riki stared at her, lost in his own thoughts before he stood up too. Grabbing her arm abruptly, pulling her into his warmth.

He wasn't always a man of many words but his actions always spoke louder. He held her like she was the most precious gem, because deep down she was to him. It might be ridiculous but he didn't care when his heart yearned and ached for her.

He held her tight. Making her breath hitch before she wrapped her arms around his waist, careful as to not disturb his wounds.

"No more running away." He whispered to her ear.

So she no longer ran away. Instead, she ran to him. He knew she was strong and capable but that never stopped him from protecting her, just as she has protected him.

But what he didn't know was the true terror he would experience when he sees her bloody and bruised body tied at the town center as the people screamed for her to be beheaded. There stood a knight. Ready to strike with his blade after torturing her for their entertainment. Riki's body reacted before his brain. Running on pure adrenaline and instinct.

His black wings spread lighting flames in their wake, making the people run screaming. "LET GO OF HER NOW." He madly shouted making the knight stand frozen in fear as the fierceless fiend stood in front of him with his claws ready to tear him apart.

Losing control of his powers he begins to claw at the man that was responsible for hurting her.

"RIKI STOP" She yelled, watching him lose control just like he did before. This time, she won't run away. Kneeling on the ground, she coughed blood. Her vision blurry. The stabs in her body burn as she tried to cast a spell. Losing more blood. Riki snapped out of it hearing her weak voice call out to him.

His wings protectively wrapped around her as he held her in his strong arms. "Please don't go yet..." There it was, his soft heart that never really left. She smiled, "just stay here for a second I will get help." He desperately tried to keep her awake. "I'll be okay, I promise. I will heal… just wait for me? Okay?" He stilled, stunned. Not sure what to make of her words but trusting her nonetheless.

Her eyes closed but her pulse was still beating. Wasting no time. He didn't care who was watching as he held her close to his chest before soaring high. Taking her back home.

There he attended to her wounds the same way she did for him. Wiping the blood from her body and keeping his touch gentle. Just like she always did. He didn't really know when or how but she softened his rough edges without ever trying to change him. She never tried to morph him into a box. Through her recklessly and wits he felt the walls around his heart and soul crack day by day.

It was no longer just his heart that yearned for her presence but his soul too. He laid for many nights waiting for her to wake up once more. He would wait an eternity if he had to.

────

Laying on the grass filled with wild flowers. He sighed, looking at the sky with a frown. The hues of the sunset almost felt like it mocked him in his loathsome state.

Then he heard it. Heard her again.

"Stop staring at the sky like it personally offended you, dumbass." He stood up watching her sit beside him with a warm smile. "You.." He touched her cheek, before pinching it making sure she's real. "Ouch! Quit that" She playfully smacked his hand before speaking, "sorry it took a while for me to be back." She offered him a small smile. Making his heart beat out of his chest as he pulled her into his chest. Holding her like it was second nature to him, and maybe it was.

"I missed you too." Her voice muffled slightly from his embrace. Pulling back just enough to look at her face again. "Never scare me like that again." But before she could protest he leaned in, his lips grazing hers in touch so gentle she would almost mistake it for the wind.

"I promise." She sealed it by wrapping her lips around his in a kiss filled with the many words they couldn't speak.

Maybe their beginnings were never meant to be perfect, maybe they were meant to be broken into pieces so they would fit into one whole. Two souls tied to a fate that they never chose, to a fate that they defied to be together. Maybe that's what love meant in the end.

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© heeikeuu | likes and reblogs are appreciated ♡

[heeikeuu]

ㅤㅤ ࿐ ࿔*:･ﾟ random enha texts

[but it's actually just things I have said]

tw :: crude humor, silly enha, bsf or bf enha (whatever u want <3)

note :: this is honestly just me being unhinged in my friends dms (they love me I swear) ALSO FIRST SMAU?? Hope this is entertaining for at least for 1 person

hyung line || maknae line

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© heeikeuu | likes and reblogs are appreciated ♡