helleanorlance

[helleanorlance]

do you ever hear yourself talking and one word comes out very pronounced in you regional accent and you get irrationally embarrassed because oh no now people are going to know i’m from a place

[helleanorlance]

Starting my speech at the Omelas city counsel with a child acknowledgement statement

[helleanorlance]

Humphrey scratched my eyelid in the middle of the night last night trying to get my attention and even though it’s not actively bloody or anything I’m putting the photo under a cut in case it grosses anyone out. But all I can think about is what if my eye had been open??? That would have been an emergency room trip and an eyepatch for sure.

[helleanorlance]

I have a really hard time taking even the most mild criticism, because of my anxiety, and my mom takes it SO personally. Like it already sucks that I start crying because of something minor that she said but then every single time it turns into a whole thing about why would I think that of her and it makes the whole situation a million times worse.

[helleanorlance]

they enjoyed the sunset together

[helleanorlance]

Just got a group text telling my mom and me that my cousin had a baby. We did not know she was even pregnant. Why is everyone in my family so weird???

[helleanorlance]

There needs to be a way to communicate to people that you have IBS without having to say that you have IBS

[helleanorlance]

"The Cellist” by John Akande

[helleanorlance]

Truly wild to watch the country explode into anger over pedophilia without actually giving any more of a fuck about children.

[helleanorlance]

[helleanorlance]

[helleanorlance]

Well friends my day was, in many ways, a train wreck, which involved multiple children having emotional breakdowns and ended with an incredibly loud and horrible noise emanating from a toilet for about 6 minutes. But on the plus side, I made a pretty kick-ass escape room.

[helleanorlance]

everything is a horse if you are wrong about what things are

[helleanorlance]

[helleanorlance]

Nobody else in this Panera can sense the witch realm

[helleanorlance]

Looking for a thriller novel that is good. I do not need it to be great but I do really want something that is a step above fine and forgettable

[helleanorlance]

I got a gel manicure back in May and I’ve just been cutting my nails normally and letting the polish grow out because I can’t get it off myself and I don’t want to pay to go back and have them do it. So today some of the kids at camp told me they were going to do my nails tomorrow (it was NOT a question) and I was like “well this is the state of them” and they started just peeling the gel off my nails??? These children have no boundaries.