hellothere1061
hellothere1061
Hellothere1061
238 posts
30-something year old male DL that wears diapers occasionally, and has autism. Call me Dillon! 18+ only! Feel free to send asks or messages!
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hellothere1061 · 2 months ago
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Littles weekend
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This past weekend was such a fun experience with many abdl friends. Special thanks to @bigbropyro for hosting such an awesome bonfire!
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hellothere1061 · 2 months ago
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I was playing assassin's Creed Valhalla, I didn't realize how soggy I was until a friend asked for a diaper check 🫣💦
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hellothere1061 · 5 months ago
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Hey where did you find that diaper curse
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hellothere1061 · 6 months ago
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I was soaked this morning 😂
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hellothere1061 · 7 months ago
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Diap me up baby 🚼🍼
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hellothere1061 · 7 months ago
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Tykables Camelots
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First time trying a Tykables Camelot! Given to me by a friend, and it is so awesome and comfy!
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hellothere1061 · 8 months ago
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Do you need. Daddy
No
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hellothere1061 · 8 months ago
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Day 1 at Montreal neurological hospital. I’ll spend at least 7 days like this to monitor seizures and adjust proper treatment.
So far, they captured and confirmed an authentic grand mal (tonic clonic) one. I slept 2h after and had a soaked wet diaper really bad. 😵‍💫 Bab rat lab🥴
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hellothere1061 · 9 months ago
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I might be late to work because of it, but I couldn't resist giving this PeekAbu the love it deserved 🤤
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hellothere1061 · 9 months ago
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This is great
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hellothere1061 · 11 months ago
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My diaper time of 2.5 weeks is about to end, but here are some highlights
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hellothere1061 · 11 months ago
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I want to share something with you all about @litpuptrooper to help you understand how amazing he truly is.
He's in grad school and doing his final year before his phd data defense for inorganic chemistry, thats a huge accomplishment on its own.
To add on, he spends at least 16 hours driving every weekend to come visit me because its way cheaper for him to drive and I can't ever do enough to repay him for that. I dedicate weekends to him to do whatever he wants and I'm trying to get a break in work to visit him more often.
He's the most caring, gentle, selfless person I've ever met and I'm thankful every day that he found me.
Before trooper came into my life, I was aromatic and never felt attraction to anyone, he's the first person to make me feel this way. I am discovering all sorts of new feelings and I am so thankful to be his fiancé and I look forward to spending the rest of my life with him.
We are very different personality wise and he's constantly changing me for the better. I can walk up and have a conversation with anyone, and I love creating social events and going out at night and when he's with me, that makes everything even more special. Trooper is a homebody and shy around other people until he knows you, but he would still rather stay home with me than go out, but we still find ways to compromise so we both get what we want.
My adhd pulls my brain in a lot of directions, and Trooper is like steroids for that because I care so much about him. My phone helps me stay in the moment and centers me, but it can also pull me in so I'm only focusing on it and not him, and I'm working on finding a balance and he's being patient with me.
I love you buddy, and I am looking forward to being your husband, I want to be with you for the rest of our lives ❤️
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hellothere1061 · 11 months ago
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Doing Business, Parts 100, 101, & Epilogue
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You know what? Let's just wrap this baby (heh) up. Here, for you, are the last two chapters of Doing Business and the epilogue.
One Hundred
I suspected that Mommy knew a conversation was coming. She might not have known about what, but she could read me better than anyone else, and I was sure that I had been emitting signals since we stepped out of the office together at the end of the day. Whereas my mother would probably pressure me to just say whatever was on my mind, Mommy would patiently wait for me to bring the topic up myself. 
“Did you have a good day?” Mommy asked me later, as she prepared dinner in the kitchen. The knowing smirk on her face suggested that some little bird probably told her a thing or two about what happened while she wasn’t in her office.
“It was good,” I nodded. I tried to keep a straight face, but I couldn’t help but smile like a fool.
“Neve not only changed your stinky bottom, but she fed you too, huh? You were spoiled.”
I nodded, feeling my face turn red. “I-I was looking for you, but…you weren’t around.”
“I’m glad that she was there for you, then. I wish I had been around, but I had a pretty busy day today.”
I smiled at her, unsure of what else to say. A conversation about a key was almost to the tip of my tongue, but I wasn’t ready just yet.
Just as Mommy could likely sense that I had something I wanted to talk about, I sensed something in Mommy’s attitude too. She could sometimes be tricky to read though, and so the best that I could guess was that she was…amused? Amused at the conversation she knew was coming? Amused about something else altogether? 
It was mostly silent as we ate, neither of us pushing the other to talk about the things that we didn’t want to talk about yet. Though this didn’t make for an awkward atmosphere. Quite the opposite, really–I was learning that comfortable silence was a sign of a healthy relationship.
“How’s your diaper doing?” Mommy asked, framing the question so casually that she might as well have been asking if we got any mail today.
“Uhm, it’s a little damp.” I quickly added: “Because I chose to wet it. Not, like, I had an accident…”
“Are you trying to convince me? Or yourself?”
We both laughed.
The end–the end of the life we had known since we left our old company–felt near. I could feel it, as I was sure Mommy could. Usually, it felt kind of scary, but I was starting to feel that I had made peace with it. Whatever came next, Mommy would be there. Diapers would be there–if I wanted them. 
“I’m always available to babysit,” she said. “Should you ever need it.”
I laughed. “I know.”
“But that offer doesn’t extend to actual children,” she said. “I’m not sure if my particular set of skills translates well to them.”
I laughed. “Do you really think I’m going to have kids one day?”
“You might. I think you’d be a good daddy.”
I laughed again, shaking my head. Feeling the thick diaper between my thighs, the idea seemed preposterous. “How do you figure?”
“Well, I’ve never been a parent myself, but…”
“Yes,” I interrupted. “You’re a parent.”
“You know what I mean, Clark. But I’ve long theorized that a good parent is someone who can anticipate a child’s needs. And, who could do that any better than someone who has all the experience you do in being a needy child?”
“Hey…”
“I’m just saying.”
“If I ever have children,” I said–and this felt like the most fantastical thing I’d ever said, “you’re not getting out of babysitting duties. You’ll be another grandmother.”
“Ugh,” Mommy groaned, shaking her head. “If that’s what you’re going to call me, I forbid you from ever having children.”
We both laughed again.
Maybe I just wanted to stop talking about having children of my own, or maybe I realized I was a little less patient than I thought I’d be, but this felt like the time to bring up the thing that was on my mind. 
“So…”
Mommy smiled and nodded, patiently awaiting whatever it was I had to say. “Yes, Clark?”
“I’ve been, uh, thinking…” The words were harder to get out than I thought they’d be.
“Take your time,” Mommy said. 
I couldn’t stammer and stumble my way through this. I was asking for more than the chastity to be removed–I was asking for my agency to be restored. I was asking for the symbolic end of my time as a baby. I needed to say the words, and I needed to say them confidently. I had nothing planned or rehearsed in advance, but I hoped that if I just spoke from my heart, it didn’t matter.
“You chose me. You could’ve chosen anyone else. And, perhaps, if I hadn’t blundered down your hallway one afternoon, someone else would’ve eventually. But I firmly believe that fate is what pulled us together, and I’m forever thankful for it. You changed my life for the better.
“I’ve loved being under your control and completely surrendering myself to you. And I’ve loved being in chastity for you. That sounds kinda crazy…but it’s true. Every time I was reminded that it was there, it felt like it was your actual hand in my pants–keeping me under your control. There’s a part of me that wouldn’t mind experiencing that forever, you know? But there’s another part of me that…uhm…”
Mommy smiled. Her entire face had a warm glow to it that helped to keep me as calm and collected as I could be. “Yes?” she asked, her voice sounding infinitely patient.
“If I’m going to be an, uh, adult–” That word still felt foreign to me. “–then I think I need that agency back. Mommy? Will you…unlock me?”
Mommy remained smiling as she sat back in her chair, her hands folded in front of her. “Clark, I’ve told you many times that I’d be willing to unlock you as soon as you asked. But…”
But? I didn’t expect a ‘but.’
“But,” Mommy repeated, “it seems the topic of the key to your chastity is a popular one. Believe it or not, this is not the first time someone’s talked to me about it today.”
“T-today? Who else talked to you about it?”
“A received a call this morning from someone who was interested in acquiring the key for themselves.”
“What?” I exclaimed. “Who was this? Wh-what did you say?”
“Well, I was asked not to reveal the identity of the interested party as part of the transaction. And I’m a woman of my word, Clark.”
“So…you actually…gave the key to someone else? Who… Where is the key?”
“If anyone else on the face of the Earth was to have the key, who would you want to have it? I told you, I can’t tell you who has it. But I also don’t think you need me to tell you where it is.”
I bit my bottom lip as my heart raced. Does this mean that…
I had to go. I had to go there–to where the key was. 
I had to go to Ava’s.
“I, uh…I think I need to go.”
“Right now? Do you at least want a diaper change first? A shower? New clothes?”
“I-I think I’m good. I’m just going to go.”
She laughed. “How are you getting to…wherever it is you’re going?”
It felt silly to talk about being ready to take all of my own agency back, only to have to ask Mommy for a ride. But…maybe that was being an adult too–knowing when to rely on yourself and knowing when to rely on others. “Uhm…”
“Put your shoes on,” Mommy said. “You tell me where you want to go, and I’ll take you there.”
On the drive over to Ava and Lyndie’s apartment, I texted Lyndie:
Me: “Hey, are you home right now?”
Lyndie: “No, why? Is everything okay?”
Me: “Everything’s fine. But is Ava home, do you know?”
Lyndie: “She should be. What’s going on?”
Me: “I’ll tell you later. But, maybe you could just do me a little favor?”
Lyndie: “What sort of favor?”
Me: “Maybe you could just…not go back to your place for a while?”
Lyndie: [Long string of emojis featuring two large eyes glancing off to the side.]
Me: “Thanks!”
After I had given Mommy Ava’s address–not that she really needed guidance on where to drive–we didn’t talk too much. She left me to my thoughts as I tried my hardest to not talk myself out of knocking on Ava’s door.
What if I’m wrong? But would Mommy really let me make an ass out of myself if it wasn’t Ava? I didn’t think so.
“We’re here,” Mommy said, her hand reaching over and shaking my upper thigh. “Would you like me to go in with you?”
I laughed and shook my head, and she laughed too. “I’m good.”
“Should I wait around, or…”
“No,” I said, again smiling. “I think you’re good to go home.”
“Fine,” she said, some faux-disappointment in her voice. “I know when I’m not wanted.”
“Mommy?”
“Yes, Baby?”
“I love you.”
“I love you too.”
And then she was gone. And then I was in the lobby. And then I was in an elevator. And then I was walking down the hall. And then I was standing in front of the door. And then I was holding my hand up to it, scared to death of knocking.
And then, at last, I knocked.
Ava answered quickly. She looked a little surprised, but not as surprised as I thought she would. “Hey, Clark.”
“Hey, Ava.”
“Whatcha doing here?” But I didn’t let her question fool me–I was certain that she not only knew why I was there, but she had been expecting me. Maybe even at this exact moment.
“I, uh, heard you have something of mine.”
“Hmm,” she nodded, as if she had to mull it over for a second to see if she could recall what I might be talking about. “I think you might be right. You want to come in?”
“Sure.”
We were both acting as calm and composed as we could, but there was this very clear electricity around us. Mine intertwined with hers, and it proceeded to fill the entire room. The entire apartment. Maybe even the entire city.
“How are you doing?” I asked. “I, uh, heard about Caleb.”
“You didn’t come over here to talk about him, did you?”
“I don’t want to talk about him. I’m asking how you are.”
“I’m okay,” she said. I could see it in her eyes–she was still processing things, but she also meant what she said.
“For what it’s worth, I’m sorry,” I said.
“Thank you, Clark.”
“Alright, so, I’m just going to come out and say it. And I don’t know if it’s the best time, or the worst time. But I just feel like I have to…”
“Just say it, Clark.”
“So…I’m fucking crazy about you, Ava. Always have been. Like, ‘crazy’ doesn’t even begin to describe it. I…well, I love you.”
There was this moment–the briefest fraction of a millisecond–where her face had no response, and I was absolutely certain that I had made some critical errors in my judgment. But then her face lit up and the biggest smile I had ever seen exploded across her face.
“I love you, Clark.”
We both moved forward, closing the short gap between us. My hands were wrapping around her body, as hers were wrapping around mine. Our lips pressed against each other, both of us gnawing at each other’s mouths like we were absolutely famished. Her tongue was in my mouth. Then, mine was in hers.
We stumbled across the room together, like we shared one body. Ava eventually steered us towards her couch, where I landed on my back, her body of top of mine. She held her head up, staring down at me with tears in her eyes and a big smile on her face. 
“What took us so long?” she asked.
I could’ve provided an answer. I could’ve mentioned my moving in with Mommy and allowing myself to become a near-literal baby. I could’ve mentioned Caleb. 
Instead: “Does it really matter now?”
“No,” she said, “I don’t think it does.”
Her face dashed downwards into mine, her lips smacking against my face like she’s a chicken pecking at me with a tiny kiss. She does it again. And again. She aims lower and sinks her face under my chin, kissing my neck. In its metal cage, my cock strains against its confines and throbs. Not much longer now, old friend.
“I’m sorry,” she said, her face hovering an 8th of an inch over my face. I breathe in her scent–floral perfume, sweat, and something sweet on her breath. “What was it that you came here for again?”
Could she smell me? Could she smell my pissy diaper? I was pretty sure that I could.
“You have something that belongs to me,” I said.
“I don’t think that’s true.”
“Hrm?”
“Well…it belonged to your Mommy. And she gave it to me. So, I hate to break it to you, but I think it’s mine now.”
I laughed and bit my bottom lip again. Somewhere lower, one of her hands was slowly drifting across my body, getting closer and closer to exploring my pants. I wondered what she’d say when she found the soggy diaper–wet once more on the drive over here–between my legs.
“So what are you going to do with it?” I asked.
“It’d be selfish of me to just hide it away and not use it, right?” Her hand reached my crotch and she gave the thick bulge in my pants a little squeeze. She let out a pleased little moan as she seemed to recognize the feeling of a squishy diaper with the firm cage somewhere beneath it. “Then again…I think it might be selfish of me to use it too.”
“How so?”
“Because, well, if I unlock you…that’s going to allow you to, uhm…”
“Ah,” I said. “And that’s all you really want me for?”
She quickly kissed my lips again. “Yup. That’s it.”
“Fair enough.”
“Could you do me a favor?” she asked.
“Anything.”
It’s only now that I realize that the key to my chastity is dangling from a chain around her neck. It looks perfect on her–like it was always meant to be there. “Reach around my neck and unfasten the chain, Clark.”
She doesn’t have to tell me twice. My hands reach up and around her head, my fingers traversing through her thick hair in search of the clasp for her necklace. When I find it, I waste a good minute of my life fumbling around as I try to blindly unfasten it. Calm down. Take it slow. One deep breath later, I tried again, this time successfully freeing the chain from her neck in just a moment. The key falls from her body and lands on my chest. She quickly snatches it away with her hand.
“D-do you want to do the honors?” I asked.
“Well…I’m feeling this diaper of yours and it seems pretty wet.”
“I’m still working on potty training,” I joked–though it wasn’t really that much of a joke.
“First, let’s get you out of this soggy thing.”
I nodded.
She slid off of my body and the couch, quickly disappearing from view. When she returned moments later, she held a pack of baby wipes in one hand. And a new diaper in the other. I was a little surprised by this, though not necessarily disappointed. 
Whatever it was she wanted, I wanted it too.
She pulled my shoes off. She unfastened my pants and pulled them down my legs, exposing my plump diaper. “Mommy let you out of the house like this?” she teased.
“I…didn’t really give her a choice,” I laughed. “She did offer to change me first though.”
“But you were in just such a rush to get here.”
“Yeah.”
“I guess I should be thankful you didn’t show up a little stinkier.” Though, judging by her blushing cheeks, she wouldn’t have minded that either.
She slowly and methodically pulled up each tape from the diaper, before opening it up, revealing the soaked padding and my pathetically caged manhood. She playfully poked at the chastity. “I feel like this little thing has stood between us for a long time.”
I thought back to that night when Ava and I were in the park together late at night. The way she climbed on top of me in the grass and began to grind her crotch against my cage until she came. Had I been unlocked that night, I’d have been inside of her. I’d have cum so hard that it would’ve been coming out her nose.
“Are you thinking about that night?” she asked me. “Back at the park?”
I nodded.
“Do you remember what we talked about?”
I laughed. “If I’m being honest…I mostly remember what we did.”
“I confessed to you that I wanted to fuck you while we were both in diapers.”
Now that she mentioned it, I did remember that. “Right. But…not just diapers. If I recall correctly, you wanted me to fuck you while your diapers were, uhm, messy.”
“Yeah,” she nodded, her cheeks turning an adorable shade of pink.
“And then you said that maybe my diapers would be messy too.”
She laughed nervously, playing with her hair a little. “I still can’t believe I told you that.”
“Dirty little girl. Is that what you want?”
She held the key in her hand, and it was so close to my chastity. We both took turns glancing at my crotch and then looking up into each other’s eyes. She slid a moist wipe across my skin, pulling up any lingering traces of my pissy-pants.
“We’ve got all the time in the world, right?” she asked. 
“Of course we do.”
“Like…I want to do that. Very badly. But that also feels way more complicated than what I’m capable of right now. All I want right now is to, like, feel you inside of me.”
I sighed with relief. “Same. Do you, uhm, want to do the honors?” My eyes drifted down to where her hand held the key again.
“No. But I think you should do it.”
She took the key and pressed it into my hand. I looked up into her face again–those big beautiful eyes staring back at me. That smile. She looked like she wanted to absolutely devour me–which I was more than fine with her doing.
I reached down between my legs with the key locked between my thumb and forefinger. Unlike the clasp on her necklace, I had no trouble completing this task. It was almost as if months and months of anticipation had me prepared for this moment. The key effortlessly slid into the lock. I turned it. There was a small ‘click.’ And then, a feeling of surreal relief. That figurative hand–Mommy’s hand–that had been latched around my manhood for all this time had suddenly loosened its grip. Ava did the rest of it, gently pulling the chastity up and away from my cock.
There was this brief moment where I worried that my shaft was broken–as if it had been locked up for so long that my body no longer knew what to do with the thing once it was freed. But those fears quickly dissipated as we watched it spring to life, growing and stiffening into its full size.
Ava grabbed it with her hand, wrapping her fingers around it tightly. “It’s a pleasure to meet you,” she said to it. “I think you and I are going to have a lot of fun together.”
“Your pants,” I said. “Take them off. Maybe…take off all your clothes.”
“Only if you take off yours.”
Despite the fact that I was only left with a shirt on at this point, Ava still managed to completely strip herself nude with time to spare so that she could help me free me of it.
She climbed on top of me again. I reached towards her thighs, running my fingertips across her smooth skin. I saw her pussy, shaved and glistening in the room’s light, and I aimed my fingers for that next, running the back of my hand across it so that I could collect some of her wetness on my own skin. I brought it back to my mouth, licking my hand clean.
There’d be time for foreplay and elaborate fantasies in the future. Like Ava had said: we had all the time in the world. This moment here was about one thing and one thing only–my cock finally sliding into her.
“I…uhm… It’s been a while,” I said. It was a warning, of sorts. I was preparing her for disappointment.
“I truly do not care,” she said. “All I want right now is to feel you inside of me.”
And then she did. Her body was perpendicular to mine as her body swallowed my cock and she proceeded to slide herself up and down upon it.
It was, admittedly, a brief experience. But when it ended–with me loudly groaning like I was some sort of wild animal–it actually felt like just the beginning. Because an hour later, I was inside of her again. Three hours after that, her body was bent over the coffee table next to the Chinese take-out we had ordered, as I positioned myself behind her so I could fuck her again.
Neither of us put a diaper on. Once our clothes had come off, in fact, they stayed off.
At one point, Ava texted Lyndie to let her know that it might be best if she stayed over at Paige’s. Lyndie was more than happy to oblige.
In the morning, I made breakfast as I waddled around her kitchen in just a diaper. I don’t pretend to be a proficient chef–but I can follow an online recipe for making pancakes well enough. As we set the table together–smiling and blushing at each other like stupid teenagers who had just discovered love for the first time–I took her hand in mine and gave her something.
“The key?” she asked.
“I want you to have it.”
“I don’t think that’s necessary anymore, do you?” she asked. 
“Well…I, uhm, decided that maybe I like it more when…”
Her hand reached between my legs, squeezing at the front of my diaper. “You’re wearing your cage again.” 
“It’s not mine,” I said. “It’s yours now.”
She smiled, leaning in to kiss me again. “This is the nicest gift I’ve ever received, Clark. But…you were silly for putting it on this morning.”
“Oh?”
“Well…I’m not done with you yet. I’m just going to use it right now, in fact.”
“But…the pancakes?”
She laughed. “They can wait, right?”
Of course they could.
One Hundred One and Epilogue
The last few weeks at Mommy’s house seemed to pass in just a few short seconds. One moment, Mommy was listening intently as I told her of my decision to keep myself locked up, and to give Ava the key, as Mommy changed my diaper. The next, I was packing diapers into a cardboard box, ready to move them to the studio. Everything between was a delightful blur–a blissful fever dream of Mommy and I taking advantage of the last of our time living together. We cuddled together almost every night. She bathed me. Dressed me. Fed me. We went through so many diapers–rivaling the amount we went through when I first moved in with her.
And then, suddenly, Mommy and I were standing in my new apartment together. Where did all that time go?
“It’s small,” Mommy said. “I think I have a closet bigger than this.”
“Well, you do have a very large closet,” I said. “I think this place is perfectly sized.”
Mommy smiled and nodded. “Oh, I do agree with that, Clarky. This place is just the right size for you.”
The studio was mine now. My things–what few things I actually had–were moved over already. Mommy, despite my insistence that she didn’t have to, purchased a few things for me that I still had need of: a new TV, a new couch, a dresser. Megan had actually donated her old bed to me. I wanted to paint over its bright pink frame, but everyone else thought it’d be so much ‘cuter’ if I didn’t–thus, I’d now be sleeping in a pink bed.
The hard part, getting everything up the stairs and into this tiny studio, was done. The couch had been an especially trying quest, though I gave Lyndie’s surprising strength most of the credit for its completion.
It was done, more or less. This was home now. 
Lyndie and Ava were taking a break outside. Megan had helped earlier, though she had to leave early to prepare herself for a date. I had lots I wanted to ask her about that, and I couldn’t wait to call her the next day to get all the details.
Now, it was just Mommy and I in my new place.
“How are you feeling?” she asked.
“Good,” I said quickly. The real answer was a lot more complicated than that, but I was sure that I didn’t need to say so.
“Did you see what I put over by the couch?” she asked.
I shook my head and craned my neck to glance around the couch. There, on the other side, was a familiar piece of purple plastic–Ms. Potty herself. I felt my cheeks warm as I smiled and nodded. “Oh, uh, thanks.”
“It never hurts to practice, Clarky. And you, especially, need all the practice you can get.”
It was a cute joke, though I could actually imagine myself pulling the potty chair out in the middle of the apartment and sitting on it while I was all by myself.
“How are you feeling?” I asked.
“Good,” she said quickly. The real answer was probably a lot more complicated than that, though she didn’t need to say so. “How do you think your mother felt when you left home to go to college?”
I shrugged. “I never asked. But I imagine it was some combination of pride and nervousness.”
“Hm,” she nodded. “Yes, I think that’s what I’m feeling.”
“I’ll be okay,” I said.
“Oh, I know you’ll be okay,” she laughed. But what about me?”
“Haven’t you lived without me far longer than you’ve lived with me? You seemed to be doing alright then.”
“Only because I didn’t know how much I actually wanted to share my space with someone else.”
“Just call Kylie,” I smirked. “She’d probably drop everything and come stay with you if you asked.”
“Tempting,” said Mommy, running her fingers across the back of one of the boxes labeled ‘onesies.’ “But as much as I love living with a baby, I think I’m looking for something else now.”
I thought back to that phone conversation I overheard between her and Ms. Beaufort a few weeks ago. Mommy had said, then, that she was ‘terrified.’ It stuck in my head because that was such a powerful word. “Are you scared?” I asked.
“I was,” she nodded. “I won’t lie to you–I was very scared for a while. It’s change, you know? And change is always unpredictable. But I’ve been feeling better about it lately. I have you to thank for that.”
“Me?”
“You’ve been a brave boy, Clark. Nobody wants to grow up, let alone twice. And yet here you are. With a place of your own, a job, friends who love you, and more drive and ambition than I remember you having when I first met you. I find it very inspiring. At the end of the day, you may have taught me more than I’ve taught you.”
“No,” I blushed, shaking my head. “Th-that’s not true.”
“I’m going to be fine, Clark,” she said, taking my hands in hers. “I know there’s more out there for me, and I’m going to find it. I’m going to travel. I’m going to meet people. I’m going to discover new parts of myself. I’m going to thrive.”
A very small part of me worried that she was just saying that to appease me–but I knew I could trust what she said. “You are.”
She walked over to the window and looked down into the parking lot behind the building. I followed behind, peering out to see what she was looking at. Down below, Lyndie and Ava were leaning against the moving van, laughing about something. 
“How are things with you and Ava?” she asked.
“Good,” I said, though that word didn’t seem sufficient. “Amazing.”
“How soon until she moves in?” It might have been a joke, her smirk made me think twice.
“I’m sure, sooner or later, we’ll end up living in the same place–wherever that is. For now…”
“Having a space that’s just yours is good,” Mommy said, her hand on my shoulder.
“It’s not much space,” I said, looking back at the new apartment. “But it’s mine.”
I walked over to one of the piles of boxes and opened the top of it to see what was inside. More diapers, of course–I suspected I’d find diapers stuffed into just about every box we opened. Beneath those, there were some notebooks–the ones I used when I was actively taking classes. I had been in touch with my school for the last few weeks, figuring out what I’d have to do to finish my degree. I’d have to retake a class or two, but it didn’t seem as difficult as I thought it’d be. Mommy had graciously offered–insisted–that she cover any of the expenses that came with returning to school, as she firmly believed it was her fault that I had gotten distracted from it in the first place. I didn’t think that was completely true, but I appreciated the gesture regardless.
The future, overall, was a popular topic of conversation over the last few weeks. I didn’t mind talking about it, but I also realized that I wasn’t ready to stop thinking about the present. Things were happening now–big things. Things that I might have been putting off–like growing up and maturing–since before I even met Mommy.
I felt a stirring in my stomach–the greasy pizza that Paige had brought over for lunch earlier in the day had displaced whatever was in there before that, and I knew that I needed to use…the potty?
I glanced over to Mommy, probably looking as doofy as I felt. “I’ll, uh, be right back,” I said, pointing towards the bathroom.
“Oh, are you one of those big boys who use the potty now?”
“I thought I might give it a whirl,” I shrugged. 
“You have your whole life to use the potty,” she said. She pointed at the opened box, where the diapers were sticking out from the top. “What do you think? Should I change you into–and then out of–your first diaper in the new apartment?”
“That’s a good idea,” I nodded.
I was wearing underwear–actual, honest-to-god boxer shorts–today. It only felt right that I wear something more mature as I moved into my own place. But I wasn’t going to turn down an offer for Mommy to put me in one more diaper–no matter how big I had wanted to feel.
“Good boy,” she said. “Lie down here on the floor. Let’s get you into this.”
Diaper changes were obviously nothing new for me–I’d been in this position hundreds, if not thousands, of times before–and I was certain that this wouldn’t be the last. Yet there was something different about the way she was looking down at me as she pulled off my pants. There was joy–and maybe a dash of sadness–etched on her face. I could feel it too.
I had been guilty of taking so much in my life for granted. We all are, probably. In hindsight, I wished I had a better relationship with my mother before I left for school. I wished I took school more seriously–both when I was in high school and when I was in college. I wished I had made a better effort to stay in touch with my old friends. But my time with Mommy felt like the exception. I didn’t feel like I had taken a single second of it for granted. I savored every diaper change. Every bath. Every gentle kiss on my cheek. Every teasing remark about how stinky my bottom was. I loved every second of it.
She unfurled a diaper on the floor between my legs and slid it under me–my ass lifting into the air to give her the space she needed. I didn’t even think about it–my body just automatically knew what to do. She found some baby powder and doused my skin with it, allowing a cloud of fine white powder to drift up into the air. This was just the start, I thought, of a scent that would likely forever be a part of this apartment. She then gave my chastised manhood a playful shake before pulling the front of the padding up through my legs and pulling each tape into place.
“There you go,” she finally said, helping me up into a sitting position. “Whenever you’re ready, Baby, why don’t you just fill them up for me.”
I got back to my feet again and took a few strides so that I could feel the thick padding between my thighs. I saw the ghostly reflection of myself in the window–me in just a t-shirt and a diaper. The classic Clark look. I walked closer to the window and looked down into the parking lot again. Ava and Lyndie weren’t there.
I wouldn’t have minded just hanging out like this for a while. Maybe unpack some boxes or sit on my new couch for a bit. But there was a pressure in my bowels that was hard to ignore, and I couldn’t deny that I really wanted Mommy to watch me make my first dirty diaper in my new place.
“W-watch me, Mommy,” I said, sounding like I was a toddler all of a sudden.
She held a hand up to her mouth as she giggled a little. “Oh? What are you going to do for me, sweetheart?”
With no effort whatsoever, Mommy could still reduce me to a pathetic baby in a single moment. “I’m…uhm…gonna…”
“Oh please, Clarky. You’ve done this so many times. And you’re still shy about talking about it?”
“I’m…gonna poopy…”
My body adopted my preferred squatting position, I closed my eyes, and I pushed.
I heard voices talking to each other. Giggling. The apartment door was opening and Lyndie and Ava were walking in, mid-conversation. They abruptly stopped. Mommy said to them: “Watch. Clarky’s making something in his diaper for us.”
I didn’t stop. I couldn’t stop at this point–though even if I could’ve, I wouldn’t have. I smiled and pushed even harder, feeling a sizeable load quickly fill the back of my new diaper. The padding expanded, crinkling loudly. My cheeks were glowing. There were more giggles from my audience.
“All done?” Mommy finally asked.
“I, uhm…think that’s it, yeah.”
“Good job!” Lyndie exclaimed. “What a show!”
“You’ve still got it,” Ava cooed. “What a legend.”
I opened my eyes to see that Mommy was already waving her hand in front of her face. “How often do you think his place will smell like this?” More laughter.
“I didn’t even think he was wearing a diaper,” Ava said. “When did that happen?”
“Oh, just a minute or three before you walked through that door,” Mommy said. “He said he had to go, so I just thought it’d be better if he did it in a diaper. A blessing, of sorts, for his new place.”
“Good call,” Lyndie said. “Though…there’s not a lot of places for that stink to go here. So…either you need to change him soon, or I might go back outside again in a few minutes.”
Mommy laughed. “Me? No, I’m not changing him.”
Lyndie rolled her eyes. “Passing the buck? You expect me to change him? It’s my day off.”
“No, no,” Mommy said, turning her head to look at Ava. “I’m passing the baton–just as I’ve already passed the key. Ava, maybe you should do the honors. Seeing as how he’s mostly your problem now.”
“Yeah, fair enough,” Ava said. “Though he’s going to have to start practicing changing diapers too. He’s not the only one who needs a change once in a while.”
“Back on the floor then, Baby,” Mommy said to me. “Legs up. Let’s all see what kind of damage we’re working with.”
Down I went again, back in the same spot I was in just a few minutes ago. The spot still felt warm, I thought.
“Hold on,” Lyndie said, stopping Ava before she could kneel down between my legs. “I want to get a picture of Clarky’s first dirty diaper in his new apartment.”
“Ooh, good idea,” Ava said, reaching for her own phone.
“And Paige is definitely going to want to see this,” Lyndie added. “Clark, you don’t mind if I send her a few pics, do you?”
“Uh…”
“Great, thanks!”
“Oh you know what?” Ava said. “Megan’s going to want to see this too.”
“Good call,” Lyndie nodded. “Might as well send one to Evan too.”
“Actually, that’s a good idea,” Mommy said, pulling out her own phone. “Ms. Beaufort would be devastated if she didn’t get to see this for herself. And Kylie.”
I looked up at them from the floor, watching as they aimed their cameras at my dirty diaper. Click. Click. Click. Click. Click. It was humiliating, but…that was my favorite thing to feel. Let them take their pictures. Let them share them. I was looking forward to conversations ten years from now when someone like Mommy or Megan would nonchalantly pull up one of these photos on their phone and show it to me. “Remember this?”
Ava set her phone aside as she lowered herself to take on her next task. Lyndie put her phone away too, though Mommy held on to hers–keeping it aimed at my diaper. Was she still taking photos as Ava changed me? A video? I didn’t ask. One day, I was sure that I’d find out.
In Ava’s hand now, was the key to my chastity, still attached to the chain she wore around her neck. “Seeing as how this is his first messy diaper in his new apartment–maybe we ought to let him celebrate?”
“Agreed,” Lyndie nodded.
“Oh, I think he’d like that very much,” Mommy said. “Clarky?”
I certainly had no objections, and I nodded my head.
The tapes were pulled up from the front of the diaper and it was pulled open–revealing both my stinky load and my locked-up little cock. Ava removed the chain from around her neck and used the key to unlock me. The moment she pulled the cage away, my manhood came to life.
“But here’s the thing,” Ava cooed. “If you wanna get off, you have to do it in your diaper, okay?”
Sure. Of course. Anywhere you want–you just tell me where. I nodded my head again.
Ava pulled the front of the diaper back up again, covering up my erection. She did her best to pull the tapes back into place. Some seemed to stick, but some had torn in her initial effort to open the diaper up. It probably didn’t matter. Now, her hand was on the front of the diaper, and she was slowly caressing the bulge under the padding. Down beneath me, I could feel my ass sliding back and forth in the mess my diaper was still holding.
My eyes closed as I felt pleasure slowly overtaking my body. But then…I felt something I wasn’t expecting. Were there…two hands on the front of my diaper? I opened my eyes to confirm that, yes, Mommy was now knelt down at my side, and her hand was also on my diaper. And Lyndie was kneeling down on the other side of me, and now her hand was on my diaper too. Mommy and Lyndie continued rubbing at the bulge in the front, while Ava’s hand slipped between my legs to feel the squishy lump where my mess was.
“Go on, Baby,” Mommy said softly. “You know you want to.”
“And we all want you to,” Lyndie said.
“Cum for us?”
I closed my eyes again. What if I’m dead? Sometimes, like now, that felt like the only reasonable answer to all of this. Moments like this surpassed even my fantasies, and I just couldn’t believe that it was actually happening to me. I couldn’t believe any of this was actually happening to me. 
What if this whole thing was just a dream?
I’d open my eyes and I’d be back in that hallway at the old office. I’d have that award plaque in my hand, the one that Anderson–well, Thomas Pritchard–gave me to hang up. Gabrielle Heller would approach me from seemingly nowhere.
“Are you the one making all the racket out here?” she’d ask, just as she did before.
“Oh...was I being loud? I didn’t mean to…”
“What is that? In your hands?”
I would nervously hold up the old award I had planned to find a dark hiding place for. I’d still feel like a little boy holding some shameful mistake up to my mother for inspection.
“The Carmichael Award from 1998?”
“I was...putting up a new award,” I’d say, pointing to the plaque I had put up in its place.
She’d scoff and shake her head. “Well, just be a little quieter about it, okay? People are trying to work here.” And then she’d turn around, walk away, and vanish. That might be the last I ever see of her.
There’d be diapers. No chastity. No network of kinky executives and their pet assistants. Lyndie wouldn’t help facilitate a nursery. I wouldn’t go to Seattle. Thomas Pritchard wouldn’t humiliate himself and inadvertently cause a number of us to leave our jobs.
Maybe I’d be friends with Lyndie, but maybe I wouldn’t. Maybe I’d fall in love with Ava, but maybe I wouldn’t. Maybe I’d meet Megan–but maybe I’d meet Martin. Paige would continue delivering pizzas to Evan and I, but we’d still only know her as Pizza Girl. Kylie would have no idea how much she loved diapers.
I could still feel the hands on my diaper, but I was almost convinced that they weren’t actually there. When–if–I opened my eyes, they wouldn’t be there, and I’d be back in that hallway by myself.
“He’s lasting longer than I thought he would,” Mommy said. 
Okay, well, I heard that.
“You can do it,” Ava cooed to me. “Make your diaper all sticky for me. For us.”
I opened my eyes, and they were there–all three of them. They were staring back at me with big smiles on their faces while they rubbed my diaper. 
This was real. It was all real. That settles it, then–I’m the luckiest person who has ever lived.
And then I came, moaning loudly and arching my back as I felt my cock spit up into the padding.
Later–much later–I was by myself in my mostly unpacked studio. Ava had offered to stay with me for the night, but was very understanding of the fact that I wanted the space for myself for that first night. More than anything, I just wanted to prove to myself that I could do it. 
For a while, I didn’t do anything at all. I just walked around, imagining where things would go when I was finishing unpacking. I stared out the window. It probably wasn’t the best view in town, but seeing a small part of a new neighborhood lit up beneath a clear sky of stars was still a sight to behold.
Tomorrow, I’d get out of bed and brush my teeth in my own bathroom. I’d take a morning piss in my toilet. I’d make my own pot of coffee. I’d heat up some of the Pop-Tarts I bought for breakfast. I’d get dressed–putting on some boxers under my pants–and I’d start working on unpacking my things. At some point, I’d meet up with Ava. 
But tonight, now that I was left to my own devices, there were a few other things I wanted to put my attention towards. For starters, I closed my blinds. I doubted anyone else could see me–save for potential perverts spying on my window from other buildings–but I liked the certainty of feeling sealed within my own space. This was my sanctuary now. I took off all my clothes, and grabbed a diaper from the stack that had been growing next to my bed. I’d been telling myself that I’d be taking a little ‘break’ from baby things once I moved–maybe I wouldn’t completely excise them from my life, but I’d try and limit my time in diapers so that they didn’t become a security blanket of sorts. 
Tonight would be the exception. I needed to feel the comforts of home, and nothing felt like home more than thick padding wrapped around my bottom and my chastised manhood.
I told myself that I wasn’t going to use the diaper–but I already knew I wasn’t going to keep that promise.
One adventure had ended, and a new one was starting. This felt like the perfect time to sit down and reflect on what I had learned so far. I sat down on the couch, the comforting sounds of the crinkling diaper filling my empty space, and I opened my laptop.  
Where to start? 
Well, the very beginning felt as good as any place to start. And the beginning would be the first time I met Ms. Heller.
The words began to pour from my fingertips:
An intern wasn’t an employee. An intern barely qualified as a human being. An intern was just a body–a hollow husk–that was only acknowledged when a task had been found that absolutely nobody else on the payroll would want to do.
I imagined that the arrangement was good for both the company and my school. Both would consider me an example of their institutions aiding and growing students with “real world experience.” And being young and naive, I believed it to be a privilege. An honor.
Thus, I was spending my daylight hours wearing a shirt and tie, discarded in a small office that was likely a supply closet before interns were brought in. It was just Lyndie and I. Watching YouTube and complaining about how warm or how cold our office was on that particular day.
My phone lit up–it was a text message from Megan. “Congratulations on your promotion to adulthood,” it said. “We all hate it here, but I’m glad you could join us.”
Me: “Thanks for your help.”
Who was this even for? I reread what I wrote and laughed a little. If this sounded dramatic–and it did–how was it going to sound when I talked about things like being passed around the spanking-gauntlet in the conference room? Or messing my diaper in the mall when I was under Kylie’s watch? Or just about everything involving Thomas Pritchard?
Whatever. This wasn’t for anyone else–it was for me. And that’s all it had to be.
But…��
Well, there was that need for humiliation, rearing its head from my subconscious again. I thought: Wouldn’t it be fun to find a place where I could share this tale? Some message boards. Social media? What if I put it all out there, and watched how people reacted to it? I had no delusions about this sordid tale being published and sitting on the shelf at a bookstore. But somewhere there was probably an audience of strangers who maybe wouldn’t believe this was true–but wanted to believe.
I told myself I’d write for a few more minutes, but the minutes became hours. My diaper swelled beneath me, though I didn't realize it as soon as I should. And when I did realize its current state, all I had to say for myself was: “Oops.”
I knew that I should probably change out of this diaper before I go to bed. Who wanted to start adulthood with a diaper rash?
Actually, that sounded like exactly the sort of thing I’d do.
Epilogue: Approximately One Year Later
The girls were in rare form, with energy levels hovering somewhere between ‘college bender’ and ‘5 year old’s birthday party.’ I got it, there was a lot to be excited about, but I wasn’t sure I had ever seen them so animated before. 
There was this country song–or maybe it was a pop song that just sounded like a country song, seeing as how I couldn’t imagine any of them actually admitting to being into country music–and they’ve been singing it to each other nonstop. Sometimes it’s a solo act. Sometimes it’s a duet. Sometimes it’s a wall of noise because all four of them were singing at once and, well, they weren’t professional performers.
“I’m telling you,” Paige said with the cadence of a warning, “you’re going to have to lasso me and drag me out of the ocean when it’s time to go.”
“Well I don’t know about that,” Lyndie smirked, “But I was planning on tying you up at some point.” 
“Ew,” Ava said, though the little smirk on her face suggested that she didn’t find the idea as repulsive as she sounded.
“This is why we got separate rooms,” Lyndie said. “You don’t have to know anything about what we do at night.”
“We might as well have gotten one room,” Megan sighed. “Because Paige is just going to tell us all about what happened anyway. With all the details.”
Paige blushed and shrugged, picking up her suitcase and sliding it into the trunk of Megan’s car. “I don’t have to share these things with you. I just assume you like hearing about them.”
“Don’t let them fool you,” Lyndie said, bending a little to kiss Paige on the cheek as she walked past. “Any grumbling you hear from them is only because they’re jealous they’re not participating themselves.”
Ava and Megan glanced at each other and laughed a little. I couldn’t really tell if that confirmed or denied what Lyndie had said. Anymore, it was like these four had their own language of specific glances, laughs, and snarky comments that I had a loose, at best, grasp for. Not that it bothered me. In fact, I was very happy for them–they had found friendship. Sisterhood. The four had combined in some Voltron-esque manner and were now a single entity.
“Aw, what’s wrong, Clarky,” Paige teased. “Are you sad because you’re not going with us?”
“Are you kidding?” Ava asked. “He’s going to a better place.”
“You make it sound like he’s going to Heaven,” Megan laughed. “He’s not dying.”
“For Clark, it’s probably the closest thing on Earth to Heaven, right?”
I nodded, feeling my cheeks warm a little. She was absolutely right about that. “I mean…a cruise does sound fun. Maybe next time.”
Things were good. Maybe things had never actually been ‘bad’ before, but they still seemed ‘better.’ We were all, as Megan was apt to say, living our best lives.
“Given the option between sunbathing on the deck of a cruise ship and having Mommy wipe his ass, I think we all know what Clark would pick everytime,” Lyndie said.
I had stopped wearing diapers to the office, leaving Risa as the last baby–something she’d probably be for the foreseeable future, considering how much she loved that role. This, in turn, seemed to free up some extra time for Lyndie around the office, who was now taking on more responsibilities and seemed to be a more integral part of the company than she’d ever been before. She was an honest-to-goodness professional now–a concept she likely would’ve rolled her eyes at, had I gone back in time two years and told her.
Still, she was a professional on her own terms. She wasn’t rotting away in a cubicle like she might have at the old company–had we not discovered the joys of diapers–she was working with close friends at a company that she practically helped build. Maybe the old Lyndie would be proud of that.
“Look, for what it’s worth,” chimed in Paige, “there’s a lot of things I’d just drop without hesitation if Gabby wanted to put me in a diaper too.” With a glance over her shoulder to Lyndie, she added: “Uh, no offense, babe.”
“None taken,” laughed Lyndie. “She’s my mentor. She’s who I aspire to be.”
Paige’s sister was back in town again, deciding that she’d be taking a break from touring for a little bit. She had a little extra money in her pocket, and Paige had some big ideas. The result was a new joint venture–a food truck operation called Pizza Girl. Now, Paige was making the pizzas instead of just delivering them, and she seemed much happier for it. Paige still had dreams of opening a brick and mortar shop, and seeing the success of the food truck thus far, I was sure that it’d only be a matter of time.
Paige ‘officially’ still lived with her sister, in the same way that Ava ‘officially’ lived with Lyndie still. Paige was practically a permanent resident at Lyndie’s apartment, just as Ava was at mine.
What Paige didn’t know–what nobody except for me knew–was that Lyndie had an engagement ring in one of her bags. At some point over the next week–maybe on the ship, or maybe on some beautiful beach–Lyndie was going to ask Paige a very important question.
“Shit, that reminds me,” Megan sighed as she stuffed her suitcase into the car. “I meant to pick up some wipes from the store but never got around to it.”
“Oh, I’ve got plenty,” Lyndie said. “Like…an absurd amount. We’ll all be fine.”
“I probably don’t need too many,” Megan shrugged. “There’s no way I’m going to be able to hide a diaper under the bathing suit I bought–and I plan on spending a lot of time in my bathing suit.”
“Is this the purple one you showed me?” Ava asked.
“Same style,” nodded Megan, “but I went for the red color instead.”
“I can’t wait to see that! I bet it’s stunning.”
One of my biggest regrets of the last few years was not getting to know Megan sooner. Now, I was ecstatic that she was not only one of my best friends, but that she had also been welcomed with open arms into our little friend group. Everyone loved Megan–how could they not? 
As always, Megan was excelling at everything. We had recently celebrated yet another promotion for her. VP of…something involving analytics, I think? She was important. Deservedly so. 
Her love life had been doing pretty well as of late too. Felix was now an occasional guest star in our lives, and the early buzz was that he was the ‘real deal.’ I’d been nervous to ask if he’d been introduced to diapers yet or not, though I did catch him quietly asking Megan at our last hang out if she needed a ‘ba-ba’ or not–and that felt like a good sign to me.
“I want to wear a diaper on the plane,” Ava said. “That’s not going to be a problem, is it? Is security going to, like, make me show them?”
“Yeah,” Lyndie teased. “They’re going to strip you down. They might even spank you if the diaper is dirty.”
“Is that how it goes, Clark?” Ava asked me. I assumed she was talking about my trip to Seattle, seeing as how I hadn’t flown since.
“Uh, yeah, something like that.” I blushed a little, unable to help myself from imagining that scene playing out in my head.
“You’ll be fine,” Megan said. “People have legitimate reasons for wearing diapers, and they fly everyday.”
“I don’t know what you’re insinuating,” Lyndie added. “Because Ava needs diapers. Don’t you, sweetie?”
Ava blushed and shook her flustered head. “I don’t need them! I just…uh…”
For a time, things were a little awkward for Ava when she went to work–to be expected when you still work closely with the guy you just broke up with. It seemed that they worked through it, though, as she now considered Caleb to be a good friend. There was a moment or two where I felt a little threatened by her friendship with Caleb–nervous that she’d one day decide that he was better for her than I was. Sensing my fears, she quickly squashed those anxieties by sitting on my lap in a diaper and whispering in my ear that she’d never do this for anyone else. ‘This,’ of course, being pushing a spectacular load into the back of her diaper. I’ve remained convinced since.
Some days, I was her baby, and she was blossoming into an incredible mommy. She had help, of course–Mommy herself was more than happy to teach Ava everything she needed to know. But then there were times when she was feeling small herself, and she needed someone to take care of her. I never imagined myself as the daddy-type before, but it was a role that I almost immediately took to. It was fun, and I was surprisingly good at it. 
Lyndie often teased us that we were just practicing for becoming real parents. We always laughed it off like it was an absurd concept. But, honestly? I could see it happening. I think Ava could too. 
“Alright,” Megan said to everyone. “Are we ready to go, or what? We gotta drop baby-britches over here–” she was pointing at me, “–off at the babysitters, and then I need some coffee before we get to the airport.”
“Hey,” I whined. “I’m not even wearing a diaper.”
“Not yet,” Ava smirked, giving me a firm slap on the bottom.
“I think we’re all packed up,” Lyndie said, closing the trunk. “Let’s get out of here.”
We’re packed into Megan’s car like sardines in a can. Someone smells like babypowder–maybe even a few someones. Megan turns the car stereo on. It’s that damn song again. Everyone’s singing. Both the song itself and the performance is lacking, but it feels so damn good to hear everyone enjoying this time together. 
And then I joined in. I added no real talent to our disaster of a choir, though everyone seems delighted by the addition of my voice.
You know what? I get it now. I fucking love this song.
We pulled up to Mommy’s house a few minutes later. The initial plan had been for everyone to stop in and say hi–but it turned out that the girls were running a little later than expected, and if Megan was going to get her extremely important pre-flight coffee, they’d have to forgo the extra socializing. 
I didn’t bring anything with me. Mommy usually made sure that everything I needed was already there. Worst case scenario, the apartment wasn’t that far away. Ava got out of the car long enough to hug me goodbye, adding a kiss at the very end that caused my cock to ache in its cage.
On that note… I opened my mouth, ready to ask a question.
Ava seemed to already have the answer: “Mommy already has the key. Maybe if you’re a good boy, she’ll unlock you. But that’s up to her.”
“I love you. Have fun.”
“I love you too,” she smiled. “And I know you’re going to have a good time with Mommy.”
“Alright, lovebirds,” Megan hollered from the open driver’s side window. “Let’s get a move on.”
As quickly as we had arrived, the car was peeling out of the driveway and back out onto the road again. That song was blasting again, and they were already singing along. It almost made my eyes well with tears, honestly. Look at what we created. These relationships and friendships, these were the best things that came from meeting Gabrielle Heller.
“Well hello there,” a voice said from behind me. Speaking of.
“Mommy!” I said, practically squealing like an excited little boy. I spun around and ran towards her, throwing my arms around her and squeezing her tightly. If my reaction looked like one of someone who hadn’t seen her in a while, that was because I hadn’t. She had only just gotten back from a trip to Japan, and before that, she was in France. This would be the first time I had seen her in about a month. Which, in baby time, was a few years. 
Her hands wrapped around me as well, venturing down my back to my ass where she gave a practiced squeeze.
“They couldn’t even send you over in a diaper?”
“They were in a hurry,” I pouted.
“Silly girls. Well I’m sure they were just excited about their little girls-only trip, hmm?”
I nodded, feeling the years already being shed from my body. Her touch, and that signature mommy-tone in her voice, had me practically shrinking in her arms.
“First things first,” she said, “we’re going to have to get you into a diaper. And these icky adult clothes are going to have to go too. Lucky for you, I picked up this adorable new onesie for you while I was in Japan. I think you’re going to love it–it’s supposed to make you look like a little duckling!”
I felt a little spurt of warmness in my pants. It wasn’t much, but it only took a few drops to soak through my boxers and my pants. “Uh oh,” I muttered, barely realizing I was even saying it aloud.
Believe it or not, I hadn’t had any accidents since giving up the 24/7 diaper lifestyle. I thought for sure there’d be a few stories to share about pissy pants and messy underwear, but aside from a few close calls, I had a perfect record. That was, except for the times I was around Mommy. The scent of her perfume, the sound of her voice–it just did something to me, and suddenly I was just a helpless little baby again.
Mommy giggled, glancing down at my crotch. “We really need to get you into a diaper. Come on.” She took my hand and led me into her house. 
Home. 
The smell was still there if I sniffed hard enough–baby powder and stale diapers. Maybe I just wanted to smell it, but I swore it was there. Too, very little had changed since I left. It was all the same furniture, in all the same places. 
Home.
It took a long time to figure it out, but I eventually realized that you could have more than one home. There was the place I lived–that was certainly home. There was the conceptual ‘home’ that I was creating with Ava–a home that was getting bigger and bigger. And there was this place. 
Ava had been right earlier–this place was the closest thing on Earth to Heaven.
“I have so much to tell you about,” Mommy said as we walked up the familiar steps to the second story. “All these pictures to show you. All these stories to tell you. And, well, just wait until you hear about the very nice man I met in Paris–I don’t think I’ve had the chance to tell you about him yet.”
My thumb was in my mouth by the time we got to the nursery. It was still there. Would it always be there? I used to think it would, but I’d learned to take nothing for granted. Things were always going to change. Mommy’s adventures hadn’t ended yet, and neither had mine. Who knew what tomorrow would bring? 
“You coming?” Mommy asked from the nursery.
If all I could be sure of was the moment I was currently in, then I was going to make the most of it. I was going to be the best damn baby I’d ever been.
I stepped through the doorway. It was good to be home.
5/9/2021 to 4/1/2024
***
I want to thank everyone who read, liked, or reblogged the story. And thank you, too, to the fine folks I chatted with about the story, the folks who gave me excellent feedback about bits I wasn't 100% certain about, and the folks who offered helpful editing suggestions. And an extra big thanks to my subscribers on Ream, whose continued support helps to make stories like this happen.
And now, onwards towards new things. Next up is a story called Milk! which, subscribers to my Ream are already a few chapters into. And, soon enough, I'll be sharing it with you here too.
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hellothere1061 · 11 months ago
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Daddy said to get me into practice for wearing big boy pants that we would need to start some training. Every time I need to go poopy I now have to go and sit on the toilet like a big boy. Daddy said I’d only need to do this for a few weeks but it’s now been several months and he said I’m still not ready to lose the diaper.
Today, I needed to poop while at one of Daddy’s friends. I tried to hide it and just go in my diaper but Daddy noticed me try to squat and marched me onto the toilet. His friend followed us in there and they both watched me do my business in my diaper. I asked to be changed straight away but Daddy said that because I was naughty and didn’t tell him when I needed to go, I would have to stay in my mess until we got home
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hellothere1061 · 1 year ago
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I feel super called out 😳
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hellothere1061 · 1 year ago
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i want someone to make me have an accident in my diapers then use the buzz wand on me 🥵
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hellothere1061 · 1 year ago
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Sometimes I just get a little too excited about a wet diaper :P
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