henlo-krista

[henlo-krista]

i could be friends with a criminal, i could be friends with an addict, i could be friends with the sick and dying and contagious and violent and miserable, but i could never, ever be friends with someone who is willing to compete on family feud

[henlo-krista]

[henlo-krista]

(Context: a magnitude 4.8 earthquake hit jersey/new york this morning. No reports of injuries or major damage)

great joke but also 👀 bootleggers I'm begging you to do the lord's work here

[henlo-krista]

The divorce arc was something else

[henlo-krista]

Why don't they make stained glass fish tanks? Give those fish Catholic guilt

[henlo-krista]

Alright girls, you know what we need to do

[henlo-krista]

no boyfriend no girlfriend no money no prospects but at least i got all these images on my cell phone

[henlo-krista]

[henlo-krista]

Happy Halloween season to this tweet specifically

[henlo-krista]

a post containment breach is usually when a specific fandom post is vague enough that folks outside of the fandom start reblogging it bc it's relatable. the opposite of this is when a random post accidentally vibes too hard with a fandom and op has to respond with "who's [this person you keep tagging]" and I for one, love that genre of post.

[henlo-krista]

[henlo-krista]

Hi this is jigsaw. last week in starbucks you did a gross fucking burp that put me off my panini. In front of you is a panini press. You will notice also, that your dick is out,

[henlo-krista]

was anyone going to tell me that the pope's dressmaker posts dick and cock on instagram or was i supposed to find out for myself

[henlo-krista]

i lead a simple life. i see a traumatized fictional man and i want to call him babygirl

[henlo-krista]

[henlo-krista]

your minimalist child getting destroyed by my baroque baby

[henlo-krista]

loudly going "YOU'RE GOOD YOU'RE GOOD" to myself to ward off the memory of every embarrassing thing i've ever done