herest0nevergrowingup

[herest0nevergrowingup]

in primary school we had a creative writing assignment where we had to ‘write about a character in a new, strange situation!’ and i wrote about a squid that was somehow teleported from the ocean to the forest floor and slowly choked to death for two pages and i’ll never quite forget my teacher’s face because it turns out she wanted ‘this new school is scary, i hope i make friends!’ and not a graphic description of a squid dying

[herest0nevergrowingup]

[herest0nevergrowingup]

The reason why I dislike Amy's husband is the same reason why I dislike Danny's brother, they both pretend to be nice guys but turn into awful people at any inconvinience.

The minute Amy refused to lend Paul money he started being disrespectful towards her.

Not the same situation of course, but Amy's husband also pretends to be nice and all, but he was ready to keep their daughter from seeing her mother, just because of relationship issues. Amy was wrong to cheat on him, but it's not a good reason to keep her daughter away from her. And he isn't blameless either going around saying I love you to his wife's employee.

These men are both convinced that they are the "nice ones" at least Danny knows he's not flawless.

[herest0nevergrowingup]

Amy's tragedy (or one of them, at least—Amy has many tragedies) is that she turned a hobby she loved into a lucrative career and in the process sucked all the joy out of it. She turned her peaceful reprieve into a stressful trap. And she doesn't have anything to replace it with.

Danny's tragedy (or one of them, at least—he also has many tragedies) is that he's bad at the thing he tried hardest to be good at. He put in the work and the time and the effort, but he doesn't get to be proud of himself, because the work didn't translate into skill and accomplishment.

And I think there's something comforting about these kind of tragedies.

Not the "there is a light at the end of the tunnel" kind of comfort.

But the "you are not alone in the dark" kind of comfort.

[herest0nevergrowingup]

amy and danny spend the majority of the season trying to get enough money to step back and just be with their families. amy in particular is trying to get back to her daughter, back into the space and time when she was with her after her birth and at peace— something was finally hers alone and then she gets it after a lot of bullshit posturing and jumping through hoops and it’s unfulfilling anyway because her daughter grew up and is becoming her own person and even then after years of working away from her, she’s more so her husbands than hers. they can never be alone like that again. she gets everything but it’s still not what she wants. it’s material— another facade to put up and showcase for everybody else. what she really wants is companionship, a relationship without exchange. no give and take, push or pull. she wants to be unashamed and free and i love that she and danny get stranded out in nature together where they can let go of everything after it all goes to shit. they’re like adam and eve, except without the guilt and before all the sins and without religion. they’re an adam and eve that were just HUMAN. neanderthals. no god/society punishing them or judging them. like. they concerns are for the basics. food and water. no bullshit plant store. no bullshit deal. no bullshit messy relationships or family or expectations. THEY GET TO LIVE. AND THEY GET TO RECOGNIZE SOMETHING SO HUMAN IN EACH OTHER. THE PIT IS LONELINESS IN A WORLD WHERE YOU ARE SURROUNDED AND WATCHED BY PEOPLE 24/7. THATS WHAT SHES TALKING ABOUT THE ENTIRE SERIES. EMPTY BUT SOLID. EMPTY BUT SOLID. EMPTY BUT SOLID. in the end they’re not spouses or siblings or neighbors or business partners or enemies or even friends. they just are. and that’s all they wanted. Oh my god.

[herest0nevergrowingup]

Beef episode 10 “Figures of Light”(2023) dir. Lee Sung Jin

[herest0nevergrowingup]

LAST ONE BORN IS NORMAL IS HAPPY IS FREE WINS

hasan minhaj, homecoming king / sing street (2016 + 2022) / little women (2019) / @/feefal_ on twitter / ferris bueller's day off (1986) / beef (2023) / the banshees of inisherin (2022) / jackie kay, "got you" / beth ann fennelly, "two sisters, one thinner, one better dressed" / michael torres, "my brother is asking for stamps" / the king of staten island (2020) / maggie stiefvater, the dream thieves / chelsea martin, "mcdonalds is impossible" / jonathan goldstein, ladies and gentlemen, the Bible!

[herest0nevergrowingup]

not me thinking beef would turn out to be enemies to lovers done right but then it’s dropping generational trauma, loneliness, the feeling of helplessness and utter despair that comes with being an adult, sibling trauma, asian parents and their inability to talk about their feelings, repressed rage- at me all at once. IM UNHINGED AND CAN BARELY SLEEP ALREADY WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?!?!

[herest0nevergrowingup]

BEEF | 1.07

[herest0nevergrowingup]

BEEF (2023) EP 10 | “Figures of Light” 

[herest0nevergrowingup]

“ There’s always something.”

BEEF — 1.07

[herest0nevergrowingup]

“I thought: what if my mother could have been happy if I’d never been born? People would die for their kids. And in a way my mother was my giant baby I grew in, and emerged from, and took care of. Couldn’t I give up my life for her? And for a moment I did.”

— Sharon Olds, “Holding To A Wall, Treading Saltwater” (via fearlastyear)

[herest0nevergrowingup]

[herest0nevergrowingup]

Found family shows what love truly is. That it isn’t a transaction or a complusion of any sorts. It’s a choice. A choice to make a home, a life, with the people you care about most. A choice to stay through it all and to trust others with your heart, and for them to trust you with theirs. 

It shows how love is perfect because it’s chosen, not forced, not required, not limited.

[herest0nevergrowingup]

“Women, teach your sons to be better!” but why? but why? nobody had to teach me how to be kind, i learned it naturally, i learned it easily. i watched and listened and took turns and sat pretty. i don’t understand. what could i teach them better than they could learn just from breathing? why is it my job to curb my brother’s anger when i’ve got my own well stewing and bubbling? why do i have to reign in my father’s spite when i can barely survive on my own at night. why is it my fault how the men act when the men are supposed to be leaders and authorities. you don’t tell a drunk driver it’s okay to do as they please. if they need a woman to show them how it’s done, maybe every single one of them should hand over the keys.

[herest0nevergrowingup]

LAST ONE BORN IS NORMAL IS HAPPY IS FREE WINS

hasan minhaj, homecoming king / sing street (2016 + 2022) / little women (2019) / @/feefal_ on twitter / ferris bueller's day off (1986) / beef (2023) / the banshees of inisherin (2022) / jackie kay, "got you" / beth ann fennelly, "two sisters, one thinner, one better dressed" / michael torres, "my brother is asking for stamps" / the king of staten island (2020) / maggie stiefvater, the dream thieves / chelsea martin, "mcdonalds is impossible" / jonathan goldstein, ladies and gentlemen, the Bible!

[herest0nevergrowingup]

“you cannot kill me in a way that matters” is so raw and powerful but it comes from an incomprehensible shitpost about mushrooms