hey-future

[hey-future]

February 16th, 2024

Hey, Future. It’s been awhile.

We’ve been trying to make you for eight months now. I’ve changed your name a dozen times since I first told you it, and now it’s a running joke of what your name of the month is.

Listen, can you do your old mom a favor? Come on over earthside. I promise you can stay warm and cozy in my tummy as long as you’d like, but I’d really like to have you on this side of the universe soon.

I can’t wait to see who you’ll be, and Auntie-Mom and Uncle-Dad are dying to meet you. Even your big brother wants you to exist! We’re all just waiting for you to be ready.

I’m still folding your stars, but not every day anymore. It makes me a little sad, so I limit myself to making them during the window where we make you. There are 235 stars in my waiting-for-you jar.

Come home soon,

Mama

[hey-future]

April 29th, 2023

Hey, Little Future! Auntie, Uncle, and I have decided when we’re going to try for you.

It’s a little earlier than I originally said, but not by too much. We hope to make you in July, and for you to be with us in April.

Little Future, we are so excited for you!

Some people say it’s bad luck to buy things before it’s “safe”, but just between the two of us, I already have lots for you, packed up nice and safe in a hope chest.

My favorite thing is the blanket I’m going to wrap you up in on your first day. It’s covered in rainbows!

You’re not a rainbow baby in the traditional sense of the term, but my tiny future, you are the rainbow after the storm of my life.

Until you’re you,

Mama.

[hey-future]

April 8, 2023

Hey, little future. I've been thinking a lot on your name lately, and talking with Auntie and Uncle about when to start trying to make you happen.

I'm thinking August. That would make you a May baby, and what better Mother's Day present could there be? May is also Uncle Don's birthday month, which will be so fun for you to share! I'd also like a June or July birthday month, but I don't want to take your cousin's birthday month of August.

I want you to be born in a warm month. Besides the realistic reasons, like not trying to dress you warmly enough for a Pittsburgh winter, summer is just my favorite time of year! Everything is brighter then, and you know what they say about summer babies. (Actually, you probably don't, but they're statistically healthier!) It will also be nice that you won't be a fragile little newborn being born into respiratory virus season — Mama works in a children's hospital, and it's a really scary season. Being born in the summer means you'll be old enough for a flu vaccine and maybe even the RSV vaccine that's being worked on now.

But that's all stuff I'll worry about for you.

For your name, I've decided that I want to wait to meet you to decide on your middle name. Your first name is set in stone, depending on your sex. But there are so many middle names that I feel would suit you... I'm not going to be able to decide until you're in my arms.

Naming a human who's going to grow up into an adult member of society is hard. Maybe it'll come to me when you're a reality.

[hey-future]

April 2, 2023

Hey, little Future! You have a probable name now.

I've been attached to these names for as long as I remember, and the more I imagine you, the more they seem you.

If you're a girl, your name will be Daisy. That's mama's favorite flower and the name of my favorite marvel character (next to Natasha.) You'll learn very quickly that mama's a big nerd. Daisy is also a reference to a Taylor Swift song — just like Mama's middle name is.

If you're a boy, your name will be Augustin. That's your grandpa's mom's last name — sadly, you will not be able to meet him. He died when I was only 21, but he would have loved you. His name was Jose, and he would have been a wonderful abuelo to you. Less importantly, Augustin(e) is a reference to a Taylor Swift song. It's silly, but it's important to me that we share that.

I thought I hoped you were a little girl, but now I've fallen in love with the idea of naming you after my dad. I'm probably the only child of his who's going to have a baby, so this is my one chance to honor him. I'd love for you to have that piece of him, passed down to him from his mother.

[hey-future]

March 29, 2023

Hey, little Future. It's mom. I've been dreaming of you for a long, long time.

You don't exist yet, you're still just an idea, a plan, a hope. But you will exist soon, and I'm so excited to meet you.

I always thought you wouldn't have family, that it would just be me and you... but I've met the most amazing people along the way, and I've made us a family.

You'll have lots of aunts and uncles. There's Aunt Tyleen, Aunt Jessie, Aunt Beth, and Uncle Jack. They're my best friends. All of them live far away, but they'll be rooting you on from afar.

There's also Auntie Laura and Uncle Don, and they'll be right around the corner! Auntie Laura and Uncle Don are special — they're the reason you'll exist. When you're older, I'll tell you the specifics, but for now, Aunt Laura and Uncle Don are giving me the gift of you — Just like another woman gave them the gift of your cousin, DJ.

Your Grandma will be around sometimes, I think. She'll be a better grandma than she was a mom. I can't wait for her to meet you.

You have some aunts by blood, too. I have two big sisters, Aleshia and Callie, and two little sisters, Teresa and Carisa. Unfortunately, you probably won't be able to meet Callie. But that's okay, you have plenty of other aunts.