heyitslapis - Tumblr blog

[heyitslapis]

heya folks, happy lesbian visibility week! my bday is next week and i'd be super appreciative of some financial help since i've had shit luck getting hired since moving. i just wanna get thru my lease so every bit is helpful, ty!

i've been on hiatus for a bit but i'm aiming to get back into gear next month so my patreon is also an option if you wanna keep up with progress on my comic or see art early or get a sketch bust from me!

⭐ MY KO-FI ⭐ MY PATREON ⭐

[heyitslapis]

why do we always have to ship characters as in love why does no one have divorce headcanons

[heyitslapis]

Gaza, Palestine 1960s

[heyitslapis]

im not immune to animated women in button-ups & ties

[heyitslapis]

"we need less sanitized queer stories" yall keep saying fucking she-ra romanticizes abuse. you couldnt possibly handle less sanitized queer stories

[heyitslapis]

Mentally floating face down in a river

[heyitslapis]

that chimera ain't right

[heyitslapis]

the bravery of a girl who has to decide what is for dinner and then cook it and then wash dishes every day forever and ever.

[heyitslapis]

I wish i had space for a desk cause i draw/write from my bed for the time being & i can feel what it does to my hips/lower back but the only alternative is to go sit at the kitchen table which creates glare on my screen and also those chairs are terribly stiff & uncomfortable

[heyitslapis]

Shout out to everyone who is just so tired So so exhausted So very very tired so very fatigued so sleepy and tired So

[heyitslapis]

U.S. conservatives always talk about creating jobs but get SO MAD whenever anyone mentions banning prison labor like imagine the insane ammout of jobs that would be created literally overnight if companies in your country had to actually employ people instead of using slave labor from people that got caught with weed 10 years ago.

[heyitslapis]

ONE HOUR AGO: greg abbott, who i have the great displeasure of calling my governor, is calling for the expulsion and jailing of ut austin students exercising their first amendment right to freedom of speech an assembly. every single motherfucker on the right soooo concerned about the first amendment seems to be creaming their pants over college students being brutalized and arrested for protesting. its fucking reprehensible.

[heyitslapis]

What is the highest number of notes on a post you have made? What's your most "successful" post?

[heyitslapis]

american gun culture literally has so many people convinced that the plot of Funny Games might happen to them at any time and the only way to prevent it is to vigorously defend their right to murder anybody who steps foot in their home

[heyitslapis]

Since the OP made their post unrebloggable (and blocked me. Both actions they are well in with their right to do)

I'm going to make my response it's own post because I think the point is important

-

As someone who is autistic and has BPD and CPTSD and loads of trauma yes you sometimes need to change how you interact with others to keep people around

When I was 13 I hit the few friends I had when I was angry

I had to change that in order to keep those friendships

When I was in my early 20s if I was losing an disagreement with my husband I would threaten to kill myself. My husband told me it hurt him and was cruel and manipulative behaviour, because it was.

So I worked hard to change that to keep my relationship

It's easy to say "I shouldn't have to change for others" and that's true to an extent. You shouldn't change your interests or passions or dim your light. And you should have space to be imperfect and flawed and not have to pretend your ugly bits aren't real. But if something you are doing it causing other people harm you kinda need to change that.

That's called "living in a society"

People adapt to each other and make space for each other in their lives. You adapt to them and they adapt to you

You start being more diligent about throwing away the empty toilet roll because it really bothers them. They start warning you before they run the blender because you hate loud noises

I stopped threatening to kill myself because I was mad I was losing an argument and my husband stopped being so vocally judgemental amount media he personally dislikes

There is a certain type of person who heard the phrase "your emotions are valid" and took that to mean "my emotional reactions and my behaviour are always objectively correct because my emotions are valid and if you have an emotional response or react to what I'm doing negatively then you are wrong and you can't be hurt because my emotions are valid"

And that's a recipe for disaster

Your emotions are valid to feel. They are how you feel and there are reasons you feel the way you do

However, your reactions and behaviour are something you can learn to control and can be irrational

We live in a society and we as people change each other as we interact and that isn't necessarily a bad thing