hhoneyu

[hhoneyu]

auguri nonna,

dicono che il tempo guarisce tutto ma tu mi manchi ogni anno sempre di più.

vorrei che le cose fossero andate diversamente quando c'eri e vorrei poterti avere ancora qui per un ultimo abbraccio.

spero tu sia fiera di me ovunque tu sia.

mi manchi sempre, ti amo.

[hhoneyu]

sometimes all I want to do is crawl into my mother's lap and whimper. hold onto her shirt with tight stubborn fists and cover her in my sadness. ask her why she can't love me. ask her why she won't love me. ask her why she'd give birth to a child she could barely look at

[hhoneyu]

e anche questo compleanno rovinato vaffanculo

[hhoneyu]

scema io che continuo a rimanere in sta casa per aiutarla invece di andarmene e lasciarla nella merda che lei stessa ha creato

[hhoneyu]

Never underestimate the way an abusive parent can kill the vibes

[hhoneyu]

growing up in a toxic yet loving household has gotta be one of the meanest things ever. of course my family loved me, but their actions are always so backhanded, and i never know if it's gonna be a good day or not. and if i you pointed out something wrong you became the problem, it was all your fault. never realizing how abnormal the behavior is until you see other parents w their kids. are you overreacting or being manipulated? i dont think my grief will ever be understood, and will live as a thorn in my heart eternally

[hhoneyu]

“you can’t heal in the same environment that made you sick”

i didn’t get this until someone put it into words. i’d never understand why i always felt better when i locked myself alone in my room rather than spending time with my toxic family. i never understood why i was bubbly and outgoing when i was with my friends but my energy was immediately drained the second i got home. i didn’t understand why regardless of the effort i put into healing i would keep getting triggered by people in my family. i never understood it until i read that sentence and it all just clicked. i can’t heal in an environment where the people are benefiting from my suffering. where the people don’t want to change the behaviour which affects me negatively.

[hhoneyu]

it’s not fair💔🕊️

[hhoneyu]

[hhoneyu]

[hhoneyu]

comunque è proprio vero che se nasci povero muori povero

[hhoneyu]

[hhoneyu]

auguri nonna mi manchi 💘

[hhoneyu]

I try so hard and its never enough.

[hhoneyu]

like i'm so fucking angry that i was the only one that truly cared about the store but i was the one that had to quit it's not fair i just want to go back and do my job in peace why do shitty people always get the good parts and i get to be home and sad because of them

[hhoneyu]

i quit my job because it was really messing with my mental health and now that i'm home i feel worse than i did there.

i gave so much for this job and i truly saw myself growing up there and i came back today to give my uniform back and i was so. fucking. angry. at the thought that people that hate that place get to stay there and i don't because they made my life miserabile and i had to leave because of them.

i loved that place more than anything and i deserved more than anyone to help make it grow and now i just have to watch people that don't care about it still be there just because they decided to make my life a living hell. and now that i quit they're still messing with my head and i hate them so much.

i'm so fucking angry and so fucking sad

[hhoneyu]

to feel unwanted is the worse thing