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I'm am influencer 😊 *influences all of my followers to attack*
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straight friend groups: *the blonde* *the jock* *the brunette* *the chad*
gay friend groups: *the suave scientist* *the exiled spy* *the repressed engineer* *the resistance fighter* *the unwitting religious figure* *the exasperated shapeshifter* *the soft dramatic dork practicing rugged frontier medicine*
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Your sims house is very decadent for someone who hates the rich.
It’s the sims…
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this theatre magazine from 1993 really gets it
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me: im feeling pretty Stable right now
brain: (shooting at my feet with a gun like an evil cowboy) I wanna see ya dance!!!
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i’m obsessed with shows like supernatural, teen wolf, etc. where a person gets attacked and the doctor in the ER is immediately like “it looks like they were attacked by a wolf” like it makes me FEEL INSANE
HOW many wolf attacks is the average US ER doctor seeing to make this instant assessment
as a wildlife biologist I wouldn’t assume a wolf attack unless the victim was found while being Actively attacked by wolves
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checking your phone in the middle of a task
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i honestly am welcome in most buildings, im an eager guest; and they love to have me
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thinking about the woman at work earlier who, upon me telling her we were about to close, immediately abandoned her half full cart of stuff and BOOKED it out of the store
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(hillary clinton voice) you’d better get yourselves to those Wet Ass Polls!
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Tony Hawk is like fucking Perry the Platypus because if I saw him without a skateboard I'd be like "A man" and the second he picks up a skateboard I'd be like "TONY HAWK?!?!?!?!?!"
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