holographheart

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New sleep style: hitting the snooze button so many times that you sleep two additional hours in ten minute intervals. I call this Horse Sleep

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fucked up that theyre advertising ball shaving kits on a website where a lot of the users dont grow body hair and have purple eyes

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the fact i have a cat who loves jerma is so insanely funny some people put on baby sensory videos of dancing strawberries i have to search youtube for shit like "jerma clips that make me feel like a microwave burger"

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when my coworker doesn’t know something he simply makes it up

rather than say a snake is non-venomous he is currently telling guests that pythons and rat snakes “have no teeth”

I want to correct him but I also want to see how this plays out… sometimes experience is the best teacher

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IM F***ING DEAD?????

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absolutely shattered that i cant tweet on my academic twitter the same way i speak on this blog

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cricket finds compliments very alarming

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Literally nothing in Elden Ring has filled me with more joy than the turtle pope. I saw him and his big handsome hat and I audibly gasped.

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you’re telling me a gay coded this

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woman called and spent ten minutes ranting to me over the phone about how domestication ruined the wild spirits of bees

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when I was a kid my mother told me not to stand in the way of the beam between the TV and the remote but what I heard was “bean”

so for YEARS I just imagined an invisible lima bean traveling through the ether across the room to reach the TV, where it presumably sprouted and grew into the electronic command. I was terrified that my body might block the Way of the Bean and knock it astray where it could not take root and would just wither and die… I did not want the magic bean that made electronics work to suffer

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Right on the heels of the fires at the Maria Prymachenko museum, news that an archive documenting Nazi crimes has been destroyed, in the name of “de-Nazification.”

Ukraine’s KGB archives are declassified. They have been crucial for historians in understanding the Soviet Union, gulags, the Cold War, etc. Will they burn too?

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antivaxxers who hate big pharma are 'treating' COVID with... viagra (pfizer)? spironolactone (pfizer)? prozac (eli lilly & co)?

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when I am emperor I will demand that you put the tracking number directly in the shipment confirmation email, and if you make me go to your website and sign in before I can access any tracking info, you’re going straight into the coliseum to fight for your life

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X

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Queuing this for January too.