honestunmerciful - Tumblr blog

[honestunmerciful]

The true irony is that your leave me as a shell of what I once was if we continued, but darling I am shell because of what we missed out on.

[honestunmerciful]

It's all the same, really. "You can forget" "Forget yourself, forget me"

But actually I can't. I've forgotten myself, that's true. Not even forgotten, I lost myself. Or you stole what made me, me. Here we are buried between years and distance without any conversation to end this once and for all. I wish i could stop this but it will eat me alive until the day i die. Dramatic? Sure, but it's been so many years and I still feel this gaping hole of a soul gnawing at any attempt to gain back my core. I'm lost. I'm stuck. I'm your prisoner. You have no mercy. I have no strength.

By all definitions I have become insane. All I want is to be whole but I know that cant happen. Atleast not entirely.

You are like a modern day succubus, except you suck the love and lively hood out of a person. You became a hollow shell and that's what you turn other people into.

You reach out when the person is most vulnerable, present yourself new. Promise a life where you can coexist with eachother only to feed on their happiness.

The victim is left high and dry, turning to substances to remember, forget, or feel something again. You have made us all numb. But you dont care, you love this shit. You think our lives dont matter. We are sheep and you are the wolf. We cannot defend ourselves nor turn away from your hungry gaze. We ravish in the kind humble words you utter from you mouth.

We kill ourselves to be better, to be whole again. But we cannot when you dont own up to the responsibility of destroying a person. This is what we are. Empty, hollow, shells of people we once were. The essence of our being is taken, and you bask in the glory of knowing you have stolen a person's life just as someone did to you.

But you are killing yourself too.

[honestunmerciful]

““Why should I be sad? I have lost someone who didn’t love me. But they lost someone who loved them.””

— Unknown

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I wish I had the guts to say this to your face

[honestunmerciful]

I can’t stand it to think my life is going so fast and I’m not really living it.

Ernest Hemingway,  The Sun Also Rises

(via kushandwizdom)

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[honestunmerciful]

im rlly whatever the opposite of a manic pixie dream girl is.,. depressed goblin nightmare man . thatsa me

[honestunmerciful]

be your own sun and be your own moon

[honestunmerciful]

I was so much more than you would let me be

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I’d cut up my heart for you to wear if you wanted it.

Margaret Mitchell, Gone with the Wind (via wordsnquotes)

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[honestunmerciful]

Brand New. Science Fiction. Waste

[honestunmerciful]

[honestunmerciful]

8/13/17

I found lots of old pictures on my laptop while I was transfering things to my new laptop, it brought back alot of memories that my mind had hid. I wanted to go see Seawolf at Juanita's on my birthday, Feb. 23. You started listening to them on your own and loved the song "Old Friend". I also remember one day I came over and you had just found out you're friend with the same name as mine had died.